dreamscape.

"...Minako."

The name left her lips before she could stop it. Her eyes widened almost immediately. Why did I just say that? She quickly clapped a hand over her mouth, mentally kicking herself for the slip-up. Before he could say anything, she grabbed the front of his collar and gave it a sharp tug, pulling him a little closer.

the reaction of her slip of the tongue made him chuckle. " a beautiful name for a beautiful lady. " cat ears flatten slightly as the blonde pulls him closer by the collar, causing him to stare straight into her eyes.

" no boy likes it when a girl acts so feisty and aggressive like you do, minako ", her name is said as a whisper, as if it is merely a secret for only both of their ears. even though he only knows her for a bit, he already loves teasing and pestering her.

clasping  his  hands  behind  his  back  ,  he  hummed  at  the  others  introduction  ,  silently  pondering  if  he  should  make  an  attempt  to  change  the  course  of  destiny.  then  again  ,  what  would  be  the  fun  in  that  ?  ah,  but  if  he  did  ,  heaven's  court  would  definitely  scold  him  for  breaking  the  rules  again.  ❝  please  ,  the  pleasure  is  all  mine.  lulu  mentioned  you  briefly  ,  said  a  friend  had  newly  joined  the  student  council.  i  hope  you  haven't  run  into  any  .  .  .  problems.  ❞

he  knew  many  students  didn't  take  kindly  to  japanese  ,  &  if  it  weren't  for  his  looks  ,  he'd  probably  be  getting  harassed  by  now.  not  that  he  already  wasn't  ,  divine  beauty  was  a  double-edged  sword.  albeit  ,  thinking  about  such  things  reminded  him  of  his  life  as  an  eighty-six  ,  hated  &  oppressed  white  pigs.  ❝  oh  ,  that's  because  i'm  a  bit  sickly  &  often  told  to  just  stay  indoors  to  be  safe.  ❞

it takes one, two breaths as he lets ren's words settle in ━ before finally realizing what he means. suzaku franctically waves her hands in denial, head shaking as a pinkish hue settles upon his cheeks. " i ━ n━━ no! that is ━ that is not what i meant!! " he's nearly panicking, obviously not intending to have such a implication.

his gaze averts, obviously embarassed and not wanting to make eye-contact for the moment. " i... my first days here were quite difficult, i won't lie. an eleven in a britannian academy, it's sour for the students. " even despite that he's piloting the lancelit for the britannian army, it makes no difference. it's only thanks to lelouch and arthur that students started to treat him better and nicely.

" oh.. is it fine for you to be out now, then? " his brows furrow in concern as he finally does look back over at him, though soon regrets it as the other steps way too close, causing him to take a step backwards and prevents himself from involuntarily blushing once more.

When  he  suggested  she  join  the  bad  side  she  blushes  again,  but  this  time  because  he  was  quite  close,  close  enough  to  whisper  and  feel  his  breath  on  her  ear.  '  Back  off  buddy! '

a swish of his tail, followed by a lazy grin. his hands remain in his pockets as he simply stares at the sailor senshi. " so agitated... reminds me of this girl i once knew. she was as easily flustered as you. i always thought it was cute ", he smirks, indirectly calling her 'cute' as well.

" hm.. disappointing. i would've loved having you by my side ", he tilts his head as he says so, with a slight tug at the corner of his lips. it definitely isn't his main purpose to have her defect to his side ━ simply her reaction and blushing is enough for his entertainment.

before  he  could  speak  however  ,  a  role  had  already  been  placed  upon  him  by  the  other  /  a  role  he  would  play  to  the  best  of  his  abilities.  ❝  eh  ?  but  you  know  curiosity  killed  the  cat  ,  right  ?  ❞  adorable  tilt  of  his  head  ,  big  ,  round  eyes  blinking  slowly  before  smiling  (  or  was  it  a  smirk  ?  )  ❝  mm  ?  yeah  ,  that's  right  ,  me  &  lulu  are  friends.  oh  !  were  you  curious  about  the  rumors  ?  ❞

lulu, a nickname only a few he hears mention lelouch with that, thus only further indicating how close the two may be. " yeah, but satisfaction brought it back, didn't it? " suzaku retorts, giving a smile in return ( one that seems a bit too friendly ).

ren seems so unlike any of lelouch's friends. maybe he simply doesn't know him as well as he once thought. as far as he knows, shirley is the only one that calls ( and is allowed to ) call him lulu. " ren? ", he repeats, as if there is any uncertainty. " a pleasure. i'm suzaku kururugi, a friend of lelouch as well. "

alas,  the  past  could  not  be  erased  nor  could  his  sins.  though,  he  doubted  the  other  would  ever  believe  him  if  he  were  to  admit  her  tragedy  was  due  to  his  folly.  an  accident  due  to  his  inability  to  control  his  geass.  'neath  his  cold  exterior  lay  a  man  shattered  &  damaged,  silently  carrying  the  weight  that  came  from  having  blood  on  his  hands.  innocent  blood.

however,  he  couldn't  stop  now.  he  was  the  self-proclaimed  messiah  who  would  bring  about  a  new  era.  hence  he  had  to  press  onward  no  matter  the  consequences   &   trail  of  blood  left  in  his  wake.  only  those  keen  enough  &  privy  to  hold  him  behind  closed  doors  knew  the  toll  euphemia's  tragic  death  had  taken  on  him.  no  one  would  ever  understand  him.  𝐧𝐨  𝐨𝐧𝐞  𝐞𝐱𝐜𝐞𝐩𝐭  𝐨𝐧𝐞  𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐚𝐫  𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐨𝐧.

❝   i  cannot  fault  you  for  hating  me.  her  death  was  [  ...  ]  accidental.  of  course,  i  don't  expect  you  to  believe  me.  however,  know  that  i  feel  no  joy  in  anything  that  happened  ,  but  i  must  press  on.  i  once  offered  you  my  hand  &  you  rejected  it,  but  that  is  neither  here  nor  there.  if  you've  come  for  revenge   ──  then,  i  won't  stop  you.  ❞

it's difficult for suzaku. to be before the man who's responsible for the death of euphemia. at times it is hard for him to see through the fog before his eyes, blinded by the hatred and anger and immense sadness of his ━ no, all of britannia's loss, even if the country believes she is a wicked princess who lied and betrayed them.

yet now, now that lelouch is before him and he is given the chance to end it all, he cannot will his hand to raise his gun he subconciously grasps. cannot bring himself to end his life just like how he ended hers.

he still remembers holding her bleeding body, remembers the paleness of her skin and the exhaustion in her eyes ━ a clear display of her trauma, of how it killed and drained her to have given the order and be responsible for thousands of deaths.

" accidental ", suzaku repeats with contempt in his voice, as if it will make him believe those words. " nothing about the execution seemed accidental to me, zero. " it is difficult, suzaku notices. so very difficult to see him differently than the childhood friend he'd grown up with. lelouch and zero overlap, unable to differentiate between the two at times ━ even if the two are far from alike.

" do you know how it felt when she asked me if they were happy? if the japanese were happy with the piece of land she'd given them? not elevens. japanese. do you know how awful it was, having to lie to her face and pretend she didn't massacre everyone? just so she could... so she could pass away without any guilt? "