♥️ Yasaki 💙

Sasaki's rambling was cut off by Goto who spoke to him in an intimidatingly stern voice

"Nope. You will go in there." She instructed, point at Sasaki's face. "Yamada's shift ends in 5 minutes. You can go in there, get some snacks, and by the time you are checking out Yamada will be gone. But she will see you, and that should be enough to get you too talking again."

Sasaki's eyes went wide at Goto's suggestion. He waved his hands in front of himself

"no I'm not avoiding the store because of her-"

Cut off again by goto, she stated

"You don't have to lie. But, just let her see you walk in, then its her choice if she wants to stop you on your walk home yes? "

Sasaki sighed, "I suppose so...but, I don't want to make her uncomfortable at work. I think its best if I just stay away."

Goto rolled her eyes, and crossed her arms,

"Listen, I can't make anything happen, I'm just saying I don't think how things have been are good for either of you. Maybe I'm wrong, maybe you are just strangers. But I think you miss Yamada, and that she misses you too. So go in there and resolve it."

Sasaki cringes when Goto calls them strangers. Every part of him does not want to go into Supermarket S, but at the same time Goto has a point. If he wants to talk to Yamada he has to do something, he can't just wait for her to make a move. She doesn't have his phone number, or the knowledge where he works or lives. Coming to that conclusion, he let's out a sigh of defeat

"I...Okay. I will"

Goto smiles, and begins to walk away, feeling victorious, she yells over her shoulder,

"good! I expect an update soon."

On the inside Goto is barely containing her excitement. She has missed the workplace romance that holds her over while her favorite Mangas are being updated. But in a more real way, she has also hated to see Yamada so down, and she hopes that what she just did helps resolve their issues

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Yamada was having a rare, mind-numbing, boring shift. The store itself was nearly void of customers, making her night drag by slowly. She couldn't wait for her shift to be over so she could go home and enjoy the little bit of her night she would have left.

Just as she was organizing her register for Oono to take over for her, she heard the mechanical hum of the automatic doors opening, announcing a customer's presence. She instinctively looked up, only to see Sasaki. She did a double take, then looked away as fast as she naturally could. She felt a mix of emotions. The usual, wanting to run away, but also a small amount of butterflies. She almost wanted to laugh watching him deliberately not look at her.

Seeing him, she wasn't sure if she was happy or sad that she wouldn't be able to check him out as register two.

________________________________________________

When Sasaki entered the store, he forced himself to not look towards register 2. He knew Yamada was there, as Goto had told him, but he couldn't bear to look and potentially make eye contact. Instead he went to his normal snack aisle, then to the drinks. Checking his watch every minute he was there as he walked though the store.

As he checked out, he felt sad not seeing Yamada, even knowing that it would have been painfully awkward he couldn't help the instinct of wanting to see her smile.

Sasaki made his way to the exit. Feeling his nerves in every part of his body. He couldn't possibly predict what would happen next, he wasn't sure if he even wanted anything to happen. Well, that was a lie, of course he did. But he never knew the right thing to say, and while things couldn't get worse he certainly didn't know how to make them better.

He left the Supermarket S, heading towards the back of the store. He stopped in front of the gate, staring for a moment, when Oonos words came back to him.

"But also lazy, somehow."

Remembering those words, he walked towards the back. He would not dissappear from Yamada's life pretending that he was being selfless, and doing what was best for her. He would confront this issue. How of course he still wasn't sure, but that didn't matter. As he turned into where he and Yamada smoked, he found it empty. He stood there for a moment, then turned to leave. If Yamada wasn't there he wouldn't want to scare some unexpected worker, like he did to the manager.

Then, just as he was about to leave, the door opened, he turned, and saw, Yamada? Tayama? Tayama. While she wasn't dressed like her usual self, she wasn't in "Yamada mode" either.

Yamada froze, looking at him like a deer in headlights. Sasaki stepped forward, and sat down.

"Join me for a smoke?" He smiled, trying his best to hide his nerves.

"Oh um, sure" Yamada said quietly, sitting down without another word.

Sasaki let out a sigh, staring at the ground as he spoke.

"Sorry, I have never been good with resolving problems. But I missed this time with you. Probably more than I should have. I got off the train and had such a long day that my feet brought me here without my brain catching up. I was going to leave, but Goto caught me and convinced me to stay. If I misread our relationship I can go, I don't want to make your workplace uncomfortable."

Yamada, also looking down, grabed the sleeve of his jacket

"don't go."

Saski finding his courage, looked at her and smiled "I won't, as long as you'll have me, I'll be here"

Yamada looked up at Sasaki, after not seeing him for so long, he felt too close. She felt like she was remembering all the little details in his face, in his eyes, in his smile.

Having him here again, it almost felt like they could just pretend nothing happened, and go back to normal. Yamada knew if thats what she wanted to do, that Sasaki would allow it. Knowing that brought her a feeling of warmth but also pain. He was such a kind person, and seeing him smile at her after what she did put an ache in her chest.

"Sasaki I...I still do have to tell you what I was supposed to tell you after your ceremony."

He tilted his head at her, and if the mood were lighter she would've made a joke about him looking like a dog. But she needed to be serious for once, and reveal her secret to Sasaki.

"Tayama isn't real Sasaki, I'm just Yamada. I know I shouldn't have lied to you, initially I did it because I thought it was funny you couldn't recognize you favorite cashier out of uniform. But then we started to hang out more, and you became my pick-me-up in the same way that I was yours. I didn't want to ruin Yamada for you, but selfishly I also just wanted to keep smoking with you, and teasing you, and embarrassing you. And now I dont want to lose what we have, but I also don't want to lie to you. But I have already lied so much I..."

As Yamada rambled on, she realized Saski was being far to quiet for what should be a huge revelation for him. He should be shocked and falling off of the milk carton he was sitting on. She paused and looked up at him, to find him staring back at her.

"You...You already know that don't you?!" She whisper-yelled in astonishment and a hint of anger.

A flash of emotions went across Sasaki's face before he began explaining, not sure where to start.

"Do you remember when I was sick, and you hit me with your bike on accident? That night was the first time I thought you could be Yamada, but I wasn't sure. After that moment? I kept wanting to ask you, but I didn't know how to, and if I was wrong, I would feel crazy for thinking such a thing. I think I had finally figured it out when I was drunk, and raced your co-worker Murakami. And, I know you probably don't member but, when I found you at the park, and carried you back, you thought you were dreaming. You asked me to stay oblivious until you were ready."

Sasaki was smiling, remembering that night, it was ironic that she confessed to him already months ago.

Yamada's whole face went red, especially when Sasaki revealed that he really did carry her. She shoved her face into the side of his arm to hide her embarrassment.

Shocked by the sudden closeness, Sasaki yelped "AH-uh Taya-uh Yamada are you alright??"

Her head shot up hearing him say her real name. Looking up at him she smiled

"It's nice, getting to be Yamada now. And it is nice to see you again Sasaki. Im...Sorry. for a lot. For hitting you for lying to you, for calling you a stranger. You never deserved any of that. I dont think I'll ever understand why you stayed, or even why you came back. But thank you, Sasaki.

Sasaki looked down at Yamada with fondness.

"I'm not blameless either Yamada. I deceived you when I found out who you really were, and then when things got tough, I left."

Sasaki looked away, frowning "I'm sorry I didn't come back sooner." Sasaki reaches into his work briefcase, and finds the present he had bought for Yamada because of course he kept it on him

"I got this when I was on by business trip, and it was supposed to be a gift just because, but I suppose it is an apology gift now"

He handed over the wrapped cigarette case, and Yamada eyes light up in shock and excitement. She took the present from him, opening it quickly. She held it close to her face.

"Its got my favorite character on it! Thank you Sasaki"

Seeing Yamada happy made Saski think that he was lucky to be able to come back into her life and make her happy.

"Your welcome, I saw it and remembered when you said that the normal packs get bent out of shape."

Yamada reached out and hugged him, Sasaki awkwardly held his arms outwards, before slowly lowering them to hug Yamada back. He thought he felt her hug tighter when he hugged her back, but before he was sure she sat back.

Yamada pointed a finger at Sasaki's face

"You better not leave again, cause now when I smoke I'll always think of you."

He blushed and laughed

"I won't as long as you dont push me away again."

Yamada looked down, her face fallen.

Sasaki bent down and, hesitantly, grabbed her chin, making her look up at him.

"I didn't say that to make you feel bad, I'm sorry. I just didn't know if you wanted to see me again. I was worried that our relationship was one sided, if not for your manager seeing me, I don't know how long it would've taken me to come back. And being here now, thinking that, it scares me a little. I'm not saying that my actions are your fault of course. But,"

Sasaki's realized that in his rambling, he had moved his hand to the side of Yamada's face and was stroking her cheek. He quickly pulled his hand back in embarrassment

"Im sorry yamada, I got caught up in what I was saying i didn't mean to make you uncomfortable"

As he stumbled back and bowed in apology Yamada began to laugh, happy that they were, more or less, back to normal. She was glad Sasaki was back to being himself, and while she didn't mind him grabbing her chin, she wouldn't admit that to him not yet at least.

"I'm glad you back Sasaki, and I won't push you away again, but don't get to bold on me."

For a minute they both smoked in a comfortable silence, and neither of them would admit it, but both felt that smoking felt better with the others company. After they finished smoking and it was time for both of them to head home and end their night.

"Still walking me home Sasaki?" Yamada asked

"Of course, Yamada" Saski replied

Yamada blushed a little "It is going to take a minute for me to get used to calling me that"