special agent box muncher

mr. beast in 2008

for real tho it feels exhausting that ive seen this whole "woman should be allowed to abstain from X beauty standard" -> "i perform X beauty standard, am i evil? do you think im evil? please forgive me i came up with a dozen excuses 🥺" since like 2015 (and i know its been going on longer than that) like girl thats not the poiiiiint

look me in the eyes. repeat after me. "i face societal pressure to perform this beauty standard. i should not face that pressure. i conform to this standard. i am rewarded for performing to this standard. i need to respect women who do not perform this standard. this is not about whether or not i am a sinner for wearing makeup."

my sister has apparently had to stop playing Skyrim because she stole every book in the game to stock her house so now her house is full of books to the point where it almost breaks the game and every time she tries to read one guards teleport into her home and arrest her

Ray Bradbury - Fahrenheit 451 (1953)

SLUT WORLD IS UNDER ATTACK

One time I came home from uni very upset and my younger siblings asked what's wrong. I said that mutated flies in our lab escaped because someone broke their jar. I didn't even realise how scary it sounded to them until I saw their faces lmao. I was upset because we were short on said flies (they don't reproduce very well) and my siblings thought that some crazy radioactive fly monsters escaped and we are all fucked now. Love being a mad scientist in their eyes lowkey

Mitch McConnell will die two weeks from today (8/31/23)

there is no need to charge or cast i just be Knowing

hi my name is dark yagami and my goal is to give birth to billions of people

If the only thing that has kept you going was outliving Mitch McConnell, imma need yall to pick a new person to outlive and fast. Your mission is not over.

This is one of your worst posts yet man

You called me dirt sucking poor and told me my carrot looks like a cock