yeehaw

do you think they didn’t remember to charge the switch

the simultaneous “slow, clean and safe” fucking ended me

"kiwi doesn't taste like anything" ???? just saying whatever

If I keep practicing I might even be a person soon

i do think it's really cute seeing them in their house making a tiktok about phil telling us they kissed during pinof and dan spitting his water out like. they know that for us that's WILD to hear them talk about and like i'm sure it also is a little wild for them that they're talking about it too just because, well, they haven't been able to before. but in their little bubble it's like yeah we kissed when we filmed that, we kissed the first day we met, we've kissed thousands of times since. i kissed you this morning after calling you a bitch. i kissed you before setting up the camera to do a spit take when you come out in your cunty sunglasses to tell the audience we kissed during pinof.

the problem is giving up genuinely feels so good #imnotdoingthat