siri

Realize why you’re scared: Is it because you’re afraid of being different or picked on? Are you afraid of change? Do you think your friends/peers won’t care about you anymore? These are all valid reasons, and once you know why, you can start to tackle it. Change isn’t bad, everyone changes, change is natural. Look around at nature, seasons change, we grow and age, animals migrate and go through metamorphosis. You don’t have to be confined to one thing forever just because you weren’t born that way. As for the fear of being picked on, fuck those people. Do you know why people tease others? It’s because they’re insecure. Hurt people hurt people. When people see you being yourself and they wish they could do that, they take it out on you because in their heart, they’re jealous. You’re not the problem, they are. (If you’re afraid of being physically hurt, that is completely different and I would not advise putting your safety in jeopardy)

Start slow. While you’re still building your wardrobe, you can start slowly stepping out with small accessories and such. Add some kandi to your outfit or a tattoo choker. This is mainly to ease yourself into it. Big changes can be pretty scary and jarring, so easing into it can help you.

Have some role models. By this I mean, have people you look up to, people that are inspiration to you. Me? Some of mine here on tumblr are @xx-may4-malic3-xx , @xx-k1tsun3-k1d-xx , @xxdespairfactionashtonxx , @cigsnvalentines to name a few. Theres also some old scene queens, musicians, ect. Find whoever you want. I’m reccomending this, because when you see other people doing the same as you, it makes you go “if they can do it, so can I”. Most people probably wont even mind if you send them an ask about specific things (ik i dont, i love them).

Kinda the same point, but build a community. We have a pretty good community here on tumblr. Community is the backbone to everything. Ideally it would be someone irl, but not everyone is lucky enough to have cool irl friendz.

Fake it till you make it. Nobody has to know you’re scared but you. I’m not saying get super extroverted if you’re introverted and go around exuding confidence like a lazar beam. Dance in your mirror, hype yourself up. Take cool pictures and edit them, even if you don’t post them online. Learn to walk with your head up, again SLOWLY. As you start introducing more alternative elements into your wardrobe, wear them with pride.

Be the change you want to see. What I mean is if you want people to be kinder, you be kinder. Try to compliment someone every day. People actually aren’t as rude as you think, maybe I’m an optimist, but I think the average person isn’t terrible. Complimenting other people also makes you feel good, try it. Piggybacking off this point, don’t take things so personally. I know if can be easier to harp on the negative looks and comments you got versus the good ones, but you have to look past this. There are gonna be bad apples always, but their misdeeds can blind you from the people who think you’re pretty cool. Don’t let one bad apple ruin the bunch.

Lastly, realize being cringe is okay. Not just realize it, but internalize it. What even is cringe? Define cringe… Weird? Different? Everyone is different, everyone is weird about something. As I said earlier, some people are just too scared to be themselves. In 80 years when you’re old and looking back on your life, would you rather regret not being your authentic self, or think of all the fond memories of your life? Regret is one of the worse things in life, it’s terrible. There is nobody you can be but yourself. You’re you, so be you.

Remember that this is something that can take months or years. I feel like this past year and a half I have become fully confident in my fashion. I have been dressing alternative for 5 years for reference. I hope this could help someone.