And today was a day just like any other...

Alright. I guess we are going to do this. Time to figure shit out before you text anyone. What the fuck do you want from life? How can things get better? Go!

First, there is one person I’m done talking with. He was an asshole to one of my friends and talking needs to stop. You need to do this now. *pauses for hinge message*

Okay that’s done. It might have been too harsh, but I really don’t give a fuck anymore.

Two, I can’t decide what I think of that other person. I’m kinda over talking to them, so maybe I stop that too. But I’m going to hold off on that until tomorrow. It’s not a drunk thing to do.

This is my current Tumblr Bio: 

I'm a 22 year old college graduate with a degree in communications and film from UMass Amherst. I don't know what I want to do with my life, I just know that I want to end doing something full of awesome. This is pretty much a look into my head. I apologize in advance. It's a bit insane, but the best people always are. ***** I play quidditch. I like Harry Potter, Doctor Who, Sherlock, and various other things. I hate blenders, sleeping with the light on, and most green food. Pottermore: NightHawthorn153 DFTBA<3</h3>

So much of it is no longer true and it makes me so sad that I’ve let my life turn into whatever this is: 

I’m 28 years old with an MFA from Boston University in film production. I currently work at a local access cable station, I hate my job, and I’m probably never going to do anything awesome with my life.

It’s still a look into my head. I’m still insane, but only the crazy, unadjusted people are. I’ve lost friendships and deeper relationships because I can’t work out my shit in a productive matter.

*****

I don’t play quidditch anymore. I run marathons because it’s the only thing keeping me sane (and I like the free banana at the end). Harry Potter is keeping my childhood alive. Doctor Who is just only re-entering my life after 6 years of being away. And I have no clue what happened to Sherlock. Luckily I’ve gotten over my fear of blenders and hatred of green foods.

I miss Pottermore.

And I’ve definitely forgot to be awesome.

Where I try to post something and it won’t let me post it. But maybe that’s a good thing because, honestly, it’s just me complaining about how much I hate my job and how I’m trying to find a new one far away from New England.

Maybe it’s a good thing the world doesn’t know how I feel. I don’t even know how I feel. I just know I need to stop feeling this way. I need to find a job where I’m respected by the people around me. I need to find a place in this world where I can fit into the types of relationships with people that I want and not force something I don’t.

A lot has happened since I posted that I was running away to Montana many years ago. But a lot has stayed the same. One thing I know for sure, I miss my blog. So I’m back! For now at least. That might change. I don’t even know if any of my old friends are on here anymore, but that’s okay. I just need a place to vent for me.