heeyeon + soojung [ things you said that made me feel real ]
( PROMPTS )still accepting!
the will to live is a luxury that many take for granted; the ability to dream without fear is a blessing disguised as something achingly common. but she doesnât face those nights every time the sun goes down--but she shakes and shivers through them just enough that the restless hours show through shadows under her eyes, in the hollows of her features.
past tense: those shadows are retreating. they were there.
present tense: they are almost gone.
she sinks down, weightless, to bridge the gap that exists between them. it is also the only bridge that links them, time flowing like water underneath that link that binds them to each other, inexplicably--fatefully.
sometimes, it takes her hours of wandering just to find her, though.
soojung canât see heeyeon, canât find a trace of her in these woods that they always find themselves in. but she knows that the other woman is here. if not, then sheâd be tossing and turning in some pitch dark place where her own skin seems to tear at her insides. sheâd be struggling to breathe, fighting to force her eyes open, waking up in a cold sweat with a heartbeat too fast to be healthy.
instead, she is simply wandering; the rustle of the leaves hum the melody that her heartbeat keeps time. the sun shines through the canopy above her, printing quaint shapes into her hair, over her skin, temporarily.
it feels like heeyeon is avoiding her, tonight.
but she knows how much these meetings, how much these woods, mean to soojung.
heeyeonâs helped her in more ways than she knows.
soojung wants--needs, to see her tonight. because there are things that need to be said. there are revelations that she needs to share--but most of all, she misses her.
her voice echoes something hollow, as if the syllables and sounds that travel through the air know of the unspoken, undefined, rules that soojung are about to break. âmeet me while weâre both awake.â the air seems to quiver with the anticipation of heeyeonâs response--as if itâs alive, and waiting with bated breath. âyouâre so much more than you give yourself credit for.â
ducking under a low-lying branch, she tucks her hair behind her ear, eyes continuously roaming around her, trying to catch a glimpse of the girl thatâs meant everything to her--especially now that soojung knows sheâs alive.
the flowers felt cheap in her hand earlier that day, while she was awake. too gaudy and bright for the soft colors of the east ward where sheâd gone to visit her mother. lingering feet and maybe, an intuition that begged to be listened to, had her passing by a name on a door, of another room, that she knew.
âpromise me youâll try.â thereâs an ache to her voice that she recognizes, a desperation, a longing. âiâll meet you in our dreams--forever and ever, if youâll just try--â
emotions are inherently selfish. they impose themselves and blind people, make them forget all sense of others to be validated through the self. itâs not fair for soojung to ask this of heeyeon. she doesnât know the circumstances that forced her into that stasis--
they find each other, as they always go.
her hair is as wild as the look in her eyes, but not nearly as hopeful as they shine. fingers tangle quickly, intimately, as if theyâve done this a million times (and perhaps they have, whoâs counting?).
when i count down to one, you are going to awaken;
every night that they meet--though the rhyme and reason behind which nights they do will forever be a mystery--Â heeyeonâs welcome is one that makes her heart stand still, then sing.
the feeling makes something in her soar.
heeyeon gives her courage, she makes her feel invincible.
feelings like the ones that she posses are not supposed to survive without the sustenance (the truth, the physicality, the expression) to properly nourish them. but the intimacy of a secret, shared world of their own makes this plane of existence just as important to her as the one she spends her physical life in. the roots of her emotions are rooted in something as old as time, they are ancient, and powerful; they are magic and they are a vital necessity, a human right.Â
her eyes open too soon, but she remembers the expression on heeyeonâs face. her eyes open to the morning light but sheâs still remembering the contours of the womanâs features, the mouthing of a response that she didnât manage to catch.
âmeet me here,â soojung draws her knees up, arms wrapping around herself as her blankets pool around her waist.
