Watching the scene in the shed, watching Will scream, “WHY AM I TIED UP?!” with such desperation. This scene hits so different now.

I mean obviously most of his strong reaction is the mindflayer controlling him, But what if what’s left of Will also feels triggered by being tied up again?!The last time he was tied up, horrific things happened to him.

Does a part of him remember Vecna tying him up to that wall in the library with those vines?!

Ever since the release of the first five minutes of Stranger Things season 5, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. Not only because of how shocking and unmistakable the scene is, but because of how it reframes everything about Will’s suffering throughout the series. It puts his pain, his fear, and his identity into devastating perspective.

When Will tells Mike, in his hidden confession, that he feels “different” and that being different makes him feel like a “mistake,” it’s clearly tied to his sexuality and to the homophobic abuse he’s endured — from his father, from classmates, and from the wider society around him since childhood. But there’s another, deeper layer: Will also feels like a mistake because of what was done to him by Vecna (and possibly even by Lonnie).

It’s no longer a secret — the allegories and imagery make it clear, especially after the opening of season 5. Even the scenes with the Mind Flayer in season 2 point toward the same truth: Will was sexually assaulted. And we shouldn’t be afraid to call it what it is. He was violated — orally penetrated — by Vecna in season 1, and again symbolically and physically by the Mind Flayer in season 2. He was raped. There are also strong implications that Lonnie may have committed similar acts during Will’s childhood, even if the show has not explicitly confirmed it.

When you’ve been through that kind of abuse, you don’t just feel broken — you feel like an error, as though your existence itself is wrong. That feeling transcends gender or sexuality. Such trauma implants the belief that you will never be capable of healthy intimacy, that you can neither love nor be loved without hurting or contaminating someone else.

Will doesn’t feel like a mistake solely because he’s gay; he feels like one because he was broken by violence. He’s terrified of becoming what hurt him — terrified of being the predator he once fell victim to, terrified of “infecting” those who care about him. That’s why his love for Mike, the person who makes him feel safest, is both healing and frightening. Mike is his safe space, the person who helps him see his difference as something beautiful — yet the same love that saves him also terrifies him, because Will feels tainted by what was done to him. To him, intimacy and sexuality have been twisted into symbols of danger.

This loss of bodily autonomy — of ownership over his own self — still haunts him. His trauma lives within him, represented through the supernatural metaphors of the show: the Upside Down, the psychic link to the Mind Flayer, the sense that something dark inside him is never fully gone.

When, in season 3, Will insists he doesn’t want to grow up, fall in love, or move on from Dungeons & Dragons and his childhood safe places, it’s not just nostalgia. It’s avoidance. Growing up means entering the world of desire, romance, and sexuality — things that, for him, are laced with horror. Puberty is the age when most people begin discovering intimacy for the first time. But for Will, those discoveries are terrifying reminders of his trauma.

Personally, I relate to this deeply. When I was in middle and high school, I wasn’t interested in relationships either. I experienced a strange disconnection from my own body — my puberty came late, and I didn’t care. In fact, I avoided it. As my friends began exploring relationships, I tried to do the same just to feel normal, but it brought me no joy, only anxiety. I didn’t understand why until I later uncovered the truth about what I’d gone through as a child — memories buried by traumatic amnesia.

Unconsciously, I had been avoiding intimacy because it had once been the source of danger, violence, and pain. And I think that’s exactly what’s happening with Will. His conflict isn’t only about being gay in the homophobic 1980s — it’s about how intimacy itself has become contaminated by violence. For him, love and danger are intertwined.

So while the people around him fall in love and grow into their adolescence, Will cannot follow. It’s not only fear of rejection or of being outed — it’s fear of reliving something he never chose, of entering an intimacy that feels inherently unsafe.

For years, even long after high school, before my memories returned, I kept asking myself: What’s wrong with me? Why did I always need to be drunk to sleep with someone? Why did being desired make me panic, cry, or dissociate? Why did I crave love yet sabotage it every time it got close? Why couldn’t I just be normal, like everyone else, when intimacy seemed so easy for them?

For Will, that same internal questioning must be constant. Except in his case, there’s also the crushing weight of queerness in a world that condemns it. As a heterosexual woman, I can’t even begin to imagine the complexity of what he feels. But as a survivor, I recognize the shape of it.

He was mocked for being gay before he even knew what that word meant. Then, when he’s violated, he later realizes that he actually is gay — and that realization feeds an unbearable self-hatred. He might tell himself: I deserved what happened. It happened because of what I am. That’s what internalized shame does: it makes you believe the violence was justified.

And to make things even worse, Vecna’s behavior during that violation — the tenderness, the caress, the chilling words, “We’re going to do beautiful things together, William” — turns the act into something grotesquely intimate. Vecna treats Will not as a person but as a masterpiece, an object of his own making, as if Will were his creation, his possession. That twisted admiration — the soft voice, the touch on the cheek — mirrors exactly how real abusers manipulate their victims: through counterfeit affection that cloaks control in the illusion of care.

I suppose that’s why this scene has affected me so deeply. It doesn’t just depict a fictional moment of horror — it echoes something real, something many survivors recognize. I know that feeling: the grooming, the gentle touch that follows violence, the soothing tone that makes the unspeakable seem almost intimate. It’s the cruelest kind of manipulation — when the person who hurts you makes you feel chosen.

With a couple mentions of events from the first five minutes (you’ve been warned) !!

I’ve actually been working on this analysis since before the first five minutes came out, but after seeing it, I had to drop everything to finish it. Because the EMOTIONS I FEEL RN.

I’m sure many of you have heard the theory, or analysis rather, of Will Byers experiencing SA in Stranger Things, specifically referring to two instances: when Will is found by Hopper and Joyce in the Upside Down with a tendril down his throat that ‘impregnated’ him (implied when he throws up the baby demogorgon), and when he gets possessed by the Mindflayer (after having watched the first five, the depiction of his s1 SA is even more uncanny). I want to talk about these representations (and their possible allusions to Lonnie), their significance, and what they mean for Will’s character.

Part I: Henry as the predator

Okay, let's break down Will's arc in each season in regards to these two events. His plot in s1 represents the act of violence itself, the loss of innocence that comes with it. He is taken from his home, the circumstances of which we are still not 100% sure of. A demogorgon spends a week hunting him, Will singing to try and self-soothe as he is living in hell.

In the finale, we have Hopper and Joyce finding Will, covered in vines, a tendril shoved into his throat which they must remove. At the time, it's unclear what exactly happened, but I think most of us assumed it was just the demogorgon impregnating him. We can infer this because of the epilogue of the s1 finale where we see Will go to the bathroom and throw up a slug-looking creature, which we later find out is a demogorgon.

Now, the first five minutes finally showed us the missing scene -- what happened to Will when the demogorgon finally got him?

The demogorgon drags Will from Castle Byers to the library where Vecna is revealed to be waiting for him ('at long last, we can begin'). The rest of the scene was incredibly difficult to watch as we see Vecna (AKA Henry, a human adult, not just a predator blindly acting on instinct) control the tendril. It was a man, controlling the tendril, intentionally. Forcing it into Will’s mouth, emptying something into him, and we know at least part of that is the baby demogorgon. Just watching it felt so so violating. The look of enjoyment on Vecna’s face watching it. Vecna stroking Will's face when he wakes up and starts crying/choking. The fact that the tendril is coming out of some kind of sac, and the vines around it look like veins.

It’s not just an allegory anymore.

This shot makes me feel sick. And want to cry (which I did). It is incredibly clear what this moment is actually depicting.

In s2, much of Will's initial plot revolves around PTSD from his time in the UD, being tormented by the same monster, even if it was under a guise. He experiences a series of visions where he is being chased by the Mindflayer, completely dissociating as the mental slowly becomes the physical. He is faced with Dart, the product of his assault, and doesn't tell anyone (except Mike) that he knows what it's from, and even then, he doesn't reveal that it came from him.

Will's possession by the Mindflayer is incredibly graphic, and it's depicted in such a violent and intrusive way, unlike many horror movies I've seen. The possession is not some invisible force entering the body; no, it's physical. It's particles that make up a being, prying their way into Will, tearing his mouth open. We can only see the shot from the shoulders up, but the Mindflayer (an extension of Henry based on what we know) is invading Will from every possible pathway into his body.

This shot perfectly depicts just how suffocating of an experience SA is, regardless of whether or not its depiction this way was intentional. Similarly, when Will opens up to Joyce about what happened, his line "I felt it everywhere" further fits into this narrative as a common way that many survivors describe the experience (especially CSA where it's a young person unable to more specifically describe what happened).

The doctors and Will's family believe that these visions are just mental, that is, until Will starts acting off. He insists on avoiding warm water, saying 'he likes it cold,' representing sensory flashbacks and being re-immersed in a traumatic experience. However, by the time anyone can realize that what happened to Will was not just in his head, even when they were with him as it happened, it’s too late.

After s2, there are no more specific depictions; however, the experiences continue to haunt Will. In s3, our monster takes a fleshy human-eating form, representing puberty as the party grows up. Around Will, his friends' romantic relationships and sexualities are emerging, but it doesn't feel like a carefree coming-of-age. No, it feels violent, tormenting, and disgusting in its grotesque embodiment. It's a reminder of what happened to Will. It's a reminder that he is always going to be different from his friends, not just for being gay. He's never going to be able to express himself, to fall in love, like the rest of the party is (but of course, we know this isn't true).

God and after all that we've seen (now in more detail), all he wanted to do was play his favorite childhood game. Mike Wheeler count your days (I still love him though).

Will was used by predators, then discarded, ignored, and discounted. His lack of perspective and distinct plot in s3 (besides his realization of his developing feelings for Mike) is symbolic of the way his experience has repressed him. And of course, he still has a lingering connection to Vecna, a persistent reminder of his trauma. Yet, anything he’s been through is no longer significant; he's pushed to the side because he's queer. And therefore, whatever he went through must not have been that bad, must not have been uncalled for, right?

There are fewer direct depictions of Will's SA plotline in s4 as the California gang is incredibly removed from Vecna and the UD (I'm convinced the entire point of their plot was just to show Will's feelings for Mike, because otherwise he'd be too wrapped up in the action). California seems like it could be a period of escapism as Vecna targets other people with their traumas. However, I believe we're just seeing the more subtle and long-term effects of the experience on Will, specifically, his views of himself and his queerness. Growing up in Hawkins and with Lonnie as his father already shrouded Will with internalized homophobia, I'm sure. But I believe this is furthered by his association of his queerness with his trauma, especially if his SA depictions in the UD are meant to represent Lonnie's abuse.

There was (and still is) a common narrative that boys who were victims of CSA by men would become gay (nature vs nurture being applied in a crazy way). Further, being in the kind of violated position Will was in is seen as emasculating (like homosexuality). This ties his queerness to those traumatic events (especially if the UD represents queerness and his experiences of SA occurred in that space). It makes him feel wrong, like a mistake, because his queerness makes him feel like the men who have taken advantage of him before (we'll get to Lonnie in a second).

But Mike makes him feel like he isn't a mistake. Like his queerness, his love for that boy, isn't gross or wrong or violating.

Now, as for s5, beyond the flashbacks to Will in the UD, there are serious implications for Will from his SA. The scenes from the trailer hit even harder now as Vecna strokes Will's face again, and there is such a visceral and raw terror in his eyes as he looks at Vecna. This is the man who shoved a tendril down his throat with the goal of reproduction and seemingly derived pleasure from it. This is the man who tore the Mindflayer into his body, and he felt it everywhere.

And now, he's going to make Will 'help him one last time.' This line in itself is already terrifying, but especially if you consider the two past times we've known Will has 'helped' him, it was both of these SA depictions. So, what on earth does that mean Vecna is going to make him do this time?

Part II: a metaphor for Lonnie’s abuse

Now, this is another theory many of you are probably familiar with, which is that Will was a victim of CSA from Lonnie. We know Lonnie was abusive towards his children already, and we know he insisted from a young age that Will was gay and needed to 'man up.' He was so worried about his kids being gay or not 'man' enough, projecting his own insecurities onto them. He was terrified of Will being gay because in his mind, it was a result/evidence of what he did to him (also, note the graffiti done by Steve and his friends in s1, 'Byers is a perv').

Looking back on Jonathan visiting Lonnie and Lonnie coming to the Byers’ house in s1 gives me the heebie geebies. First of all, we see Lonnie shove Jonathan against a wall, immediately displaying his physical aggression. Jonathan checks Lonnie's fucking trunk for Will. Once he arrives at the Byers' house, his and Jonathan's conversation in front of a graphic poster of a woman being SA by a tree (which Lonnie calls inappropriate) hints further at what their home dynamic was before he left. After Lonnie's arrival, the Byers' house shifts quickly -- Joyce stops believing herself, and starts thinking that she might really be crazy, that Will isn't still alive.

She briefly lets go of trying to find Will -- demonstrating how Lonnie is able to distract them from the truth, to dismiss it, to lead Joyce astray.

Lonnie’s abuse influenced his children in different ways, likely because his abuse was different between the two.

With Jonathan, he lacked boundaries, was authoritative and controlling, leading Jonathan to push back but also make… questionable decisions regarding boundaries of others (like photographing Nancy without her knowing oop). He had to be tough to stand up to Lonnie, and had to mature fast to comfort Will when things got rough.

Will, however, has some level of secretiveness. He does lie to others despite 'friends don't lie', and with Mike, he is careful to only tell him things when he’s ready to and insists he keep it between them.

I would suspect this has something to do with being forced to keep certain secrets by Lonnie. Being forced to be honest about things going on makes Will defensive and cagey. It makes him scared. This is further demonstrated by how no one knows about Will’s s2 possession even as the violation happens in front of them, because Will keeps it internalized, too scared to tell others, made to keep it a secret. He learned that violations like that are secret. That you don’t tell others.

The fact that Will is able to be honest with Mikes marks him as having been a safe person for Will, something I hope we’ll see in the miwi flashback and understand how much of his home life Mike really knew about (This makes his seeming indifference towards Will in season 3 even more heartbreaking). But considering Will was willing to let Mike in to some capacity regarding what was going on in s2, this could represent Mike knowing in some capacity what Lonnie did to Will.

I even think in s1, his time in the UD could be representing this as Will hides in Castle Byers. Jonathan built it with Will as a place for him to escape to, and I think it could be possible that Lonnie didn’t know where it was. So Will would use it to hide from him, like how he uses it to hide from the demogorgon, a predator. Remember, Jonathan says that Will is “good at hiding.”

Further, during Will's possession, when he is fully out of control of his body, I think this could very clearly represent his time while being abused by Lonnie. He lashes out at everyone (except Mike, really), leads soldiers to their deaths (a representation of making out-of-character decisions and hurting others), and yells as he denies it. Will was in denial while experiencing the abuse, dismissing it. However, he cracks and cries, "he made me do it."

This scene is heartbreaking. But it also provides them with a chance to free Will.

Further, if his SA at the hands of Vecna is also meant to mimic his abuse at the hands of Lonnie, this would tie Will's connection of his queerness to his assault more closely. Wondering if he's only gay because of what his dad did, fearing that he could turn out like him, repressing himself and taking it out on a kid, fearing that his love is somehow perverted and violating just by existing.

We know Vecna feeds off of other's trauma, and loves using it against them. So would it really be surprising if he took inspiration from Will's lived experiences in his torment of him?

Part III: Bringing it all together

Regardless of whether or not Will’s experiences with SA in the Upside Down are meant to mimic events from his real life or not, those by themselves are enough to relate Will’s experience to SA. He is physically and reproductively violated by a phallic-like object in a way that asserts Vecna's dominance and that he seemed to derive a sadistic kind of pleasure from.

Now this is so important for Will going into the final season. He has spent the entire show having his power stripped away from him, being used by predators, and hiding himself away. However, we know in s5, Will is at the center stage, with his connection to Vecna more important than ever. The truth of what Will has suffered at the hands of this monster will be revealed, no longer so cleanly covered up or brushed over. We are going to get a full play-by-play of how Vecna used Will, how he violated him, how he tormented him.

And yet, through it all, Will has remained a kind person. He has kept his pure heart, his genuine care for others, and his sensitivity. People are used to seeing characters who go through hell and toughen up because of it. But Will didn't. He got stronger, he had to adapt, he definitely repressed himself. But he never turned cold and emotionless. He stayed kind, selfless, and fiercely loyal to his loved ones. He has sat on the sidelines the past two seasons. But this is his moment.

This is Will's moment to stand up for himself, to reassert some of the autonomy he lost under Vecna. I am incredibly confident that out of everyone, it's going to have to be Will who ultimately takes down Vecna and the UD. Not just because of it making sense world and lore-wise, but also because of the larger message it sends.

Will was sexually assaulted by Vecna, abused and tormented beyond comprehension for years, and has internalized it all. For him to be able to stand up to this predator, this abuser, and renew his sense of personal power and belonging in his body, is one of the most symbolically important messages that could come from the show. And Will reconciling this trauma that he has deeply linked to a core part of his identity while having that identity reaffirmed to him -- by being shown that his love is not gross or wrong, by having that love reciprocated -- sends such a beautiful message to all survivors of SA. That their experiences do not make them less valuable, less lovable, or 'impure' in any way (because I'm sorry, Mike quite literally views Will as being bathed in golden light). That they can and do deserve kind and gentle love. That they deserve to feel empowered.

This is the kind of message that would've meant the world to me years ago in the immediate aftermath. This is a message that would still mean so much to me now. And to so many others. To anyone who has felt violated in their body, like their body will never really be their own again, disgusted with themself for just existing.

It adds more depth to Will's love for Mike and will make the reciprocation even more meaningful and crucial.

Knowing what we learned in the first five minutes especially, it appears that this depiction of SA is critical to Will's character and arc. To his whole experience of the UD in general -- a complex web relating his experience of queerness to his abuse. Will's story began with being used by the UD. And now it will end with him destroying it.

Thinking about how consent (and being forced) is constantly involved with Will’s scenes in s1. Same with safe spaces and doors.

Aside from the fact that the first scene we have with him is with Will being framed in front of Mike’s The Thing poster (a movie about possession, about an alien getting inside people’s bodies without consent), I’m gonna focus on flashbacks, and scenes where Will isn’t there.

The first Will flashback we have in s1 (which showed how he was/how his life was like before getting kidnapped) is this one

Will inside castle byers (his safe space). His mom wants to enter, but to enter she has to know the password. She knows it, she tells him the password and then waits until he says she can enter to actually enter.

She respects his boundaries and only steps into his safe space when he consents. Sure, I can’t imagine Will telling his mom “no” even if she didn’t remember the password, but the point is that Will is in charge here. He allows people to enter, and if he doesn’t allow it, then they don’t.

There is a handmade “door”, that is metaphorically locked, unless you have the password and Will’s permission. Will is in the other side of this “door”, nothing can touch him unless he allows it to. Castle byers is a safe space.

In his pre-kidnapping life, his boundaries are respected by his mom, and he’s in charge of who he lets in.

*his dad is nowhere mentioned in this scene, however the password to castle byers is Radagast, one of the Istari (wizards) of lord of the rings. Radagast the Brown was mainly involved with nature and animals, and was good of heart. He lived near Mirkwood, just like Will. Lonnie forced Jonathan to learn how to shoot by killing a rabbit, and we can assume the same happened to Will, since he has no hesitation handling a gun in the first ep. If Jonathan cried for a week straight, I can’t imagine Will, who is much more outwardly sensitive and merciful. Will probably choose Radagast as the password because he’s the protector of animals and nature, and protects life instead of ending it. So, he is making the choice of associating himself with life and animals, instead of killing, like his dad forced him to.

The second flashback is this one, with Jonathan.

This is a Lonnie-focused scene, and the consent/being forced theme is more obvious.

They are listening to music, until Joyce starts fighting with Lonnie on the phone, and Jonathan gets up and closes the door. Shuts Lonnie and their discussion out, Jonathan’s room becomes a safe space for the two of them, with a door separating them from the outside world (just like how the “door” in castle byers separated Will from his mom) (Joyce is getting shut out both times, interestingly. But when it’s just her the door can be opened and she’s welcomed in, but when she’s involved with Lonnie in any way, the door closes and she’s shut out).

They began to talk about the way Lonnie acts with Will. He doesn’t outright force Will to be involved with baseball, because even tho Will doesn’t like it, he does it anyway (he chooses to do it) because he wants to spend time with him (whyyyyy). However, we know he does force him to do things. Or, specially, to like things.

He's trying to force you to like normal things. And you shouldn't like things because people tell you you're supposed to. Okay? Especially not him.

During all this conversation, Will is sitting in the same place, in front of Jonathan’s The Evil Dead poster. It’s framed on his head (maybe because it’s on his mind?). The scene presented in the poster is a SA scene. While talking about Lonnie forcing Will to like things there’s a poster depicting SA right behind Will, at full sight, being framed on his head. Yeah, I’m gonna stop here.

Talking about Lonnie, one thing we know about him is that they don’t want him there.

There’s also this parallel, credits to @thewisewill80sbyers

Right…

Jonathan closing the door reminds me of

Will’s door with his “no trespassing” sign.

Does he need one? We have seen Joyce being very mindful of his privacy and respecting closed doors, and I imagine Jonathan is the same, so what’s the point of the sign?

It’s for the viewer.

It’s letting the viewer know that Will likes having his privacy, likes being able to shut people out, and that he doesn’t like it when people “trespass” on his property (aka, enter his safe spaces without permission).

(I can even go to the point of saying that if he put it on is for a reason, meaning someone was trespassing into his room. It wasn’t Joyce, it definitely wasn’t Jonathan, which means…)

Except, you know, when Will is not there (he’s in the ud), Joyce enters his room without his permission (because he’s not there). She also looks inside castle byers without permission.

So, we have seen Will’s boundaries being respected pre-kidnapping, but they are ignored during the time he’s kidnapped.

(No shade to Joyce, she wasn’t doing anything wrong because Will literally wasn’t there and weird things were going on and she just wanted to find him etc) (And the one entering without permission is Joyce, a parent, just like Lonnie is a parent)

Basically: pre-ud, his boundaries are respected, except that Lonnie forces him to like things. While in the ud, his boundaries no longer are respected, and Lonnie shows up at home despite no one really wanting him there.

The next time we see Will, after his time in the ud is finally finished (and we see the effects the ud had on him), what do we see?

In the real world, his boundaries were ignored during his week in the ud, and in the ud, his week there lead up to… that.

I don’t think I need to make it more explicit (his boundaries being ignored in the real world is a representation to how they were ignored in the ud during the same time)

But! The flashbacks are not the only piece of information we have of pre-canon Will’s life. We also have Jonathan reminding him of building castle byers (another memory involving Lonnie, meaning castle byers, his safe space, exists because of him) and

Once again, Will’s old life included autonomy. He became Mike’s friend because he wanted to, because Mike asked and he said yes.

We learn this in a moment where Will is possessed, when he has his body violated (trespassed) by the mf/Henry, and what Mike reminds him of is a memory of Will saying yes, agreeing, consenting, deciding and being in charge.

To be a human body is to be an agent; but it is also to be passive and vulnerable, an object of history as well as a subject of it. (―Terry Eagleton, Tragedy)

There's only one option I can't kill the pain so I must kill myself (―Kim Hyesoon, Face of Rhythm)