Cerize

Lovebrush Chronicles:

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - the vacancy of your smile is a curse

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - Preciously, endlessly, I long not for you, but your smile.

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - i thought you were like a plane, high in the sky and unreachable (but she gave you feathered wings)

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - shh, a new thread has been created.

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - I don't know what yearning is

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - off in the distant future and past

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - wheat grains would rather be eaten than forgotten to wither away

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - interest

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - the long walk back home

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - the "someday" I've dreamt of (pt1) (pt2)

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - snow kissed sin

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - give me your daughter

⟢ (Cael Anselm) - thoughts hued by drunken red

⟢ (Clarence Clayden) - specifically, a tiny bamboo rat.

⟢ (Clarence Clayden) - sweetest sin

⟢ (Alkaid McGrath) - dammit, he's a fool in love. someone punt him.

⟢ (Alkaid McGrath) - say hi to cancer~

⟢ (Alkaid McGrath) - how can I touch the moon?

⟢ (Lars Rorscharch) - Charles

⟢ (Lars Rorscharch) - there for you, every step of the way

⟢ (Headcannons) - Their girlfriend sends three built men to the hospital. What do they do?

⟢ (Headcannons) - How obvious it is when the boys like an overthinker.

(search under #for all time~☆ tag to find my LBC content)

Arcana Twilight :

☆ (Vega) - Restless Nights

☆ (Vega) - don't look back (but that's impossible)

☆ (Alpheratz) - inside the train is a lullaby to be sung

☆ (Sirius) - Can you hear my voice?

☆ (Sirius) - all the world's a stage (and its crumbling by the beams)

9 R.I.P. :

❀ (Kureha) - the 9th School Wonder

❀ (Koyo) - hope for the future

❀ (Secret LI) - this can't be happening

❀ (Kureha, Koyo, Sena) - first kiss problems

❀ LE Short Stories - (pt1), (pt2), (pt3), (pt4)

Jack Jeanne:

𖢻 (Mitsuki) - a satiation brought by you

𖢻 (Mitsuki) - il vaut mieux rire que pleurer

𖢻 (Fumi) - enchanted by streetlights and cobblestone

𖢻 (Fumi) - what if I stained you in scarlet

𖢻 (Fumi) - atlantic bluefin tuna

𖢻 (Fumi) - we found her in april

𖢻 (Fumi) - here's looking at you, kid

𖢻 (Suzu) - my good friend

𖢻 (Carlo, Adra, Isaac) - when showtime's over

𖢻 (Otori) - line without a hook

(search under #jj ✧ tag to find my JJ content)

sins of KALEIDO :

𖤐 (Orsem) - that kind of agony

Tensei Akujo no Kuro Rekishi :

𓋜 (Iana x Isaac) - how do I make everyone happy?

Secrets of the Silent Witch:

𖤓 (General) - numbers, only numbers

𖤓 (General) - flashy retaliation

𖤓 (General) - apollo did it better

Tilkett Route: 9.5/10

consistently fantastic with angst, there was one single stutter which threw me off but i forgave

Kanoa Route: 8.5/10

not as angsty in tone as tilkett's but he gets extra 0.5 points bcuz i love him 🥺 can be boring in the early parts for some but i personally was engaged and it really picked things up around chapter 4 (which had me crashing out)

Heath Route: 7.5/10

was on the fence with him most of the time while still enjoying his route but the ending of his route swooped in on me like a hawk only to drop me from a high altitude to splat onto the ground ow

Eugene Route: wtf 10/10

genuinely what the hell who hurt you ushio-sensei

Orsem Route: 9/10

"Not once have you ever considered yourself mine."

She was a heartless witch who gave no thought to him as she shackled him with the burden of saving the world. The very reason and cause for the Fatal Rewinds that had rendered his attachment to life dull and dead.

A curse teeters at the edge of his tongue, and he swallows it back away from her curious eyes that now hold steady on him. Instead, he tosses his gaze to the side, along with the truth.

She would believe his lies this way.

"Nor have I ever once wished for you to be."

And so he lied.

The coffee mug, now emptied and forgotten, rolls around atop his desk, before it topples over the edge. The crash of its fall is swallowed whole by the soft rug. He doesn't notice it.

Orsem wished he could lie to himself as well.

His thoughts are hazy, and every attempt he makes to grab them by the tail slips through his fingers as the alcohol pulls him under.

Orsem hears a clink. The bottle once held in his hands is now magically on the other side of the table he sprawls himself over, colliding with the brass of scales. His fingers twitch, itching for something, searching for something—

'Where's my gun?'

His humanity must have devolved, truly, if he was seeking out a weapon of murder for salvation. But the constant pings ringing from his comm incessantly remind him of the chaos that has spiralled out of his control, making his clumsy movements hasten.

'I want to die.'

And no, not just because he wants to use the Fatal Rewind. What he searches for is not another chance, not another beginning, not a redo or anything of that sort.

He wants to die.

One click. Bang. Done.

Another bottle off the table, but it crashes atop another laying on the floor. The sound shakes awake what little coherency Orsem has left in his mind, and he realizes that he's long forgone his chair, as well as his dignity, arms clinging to the table in an attempt to keep himself upright.

"Eugene..." A growl that'd turn any beast on their tails snakes out of his throat, followed by a rare slew of curse words. "...F### you, you son of a—"

Orsem heaves a long and heavy sigh, as he squeezes his eyes shut, hoping to gather his thoughts.

He sees her instead, beneath the shadow of his eyelids.

She's as beautiful as he first met her; fingers dainty, neck slender. Within him, the desire to cripple and crush those petite bones is aroused, to bruise her fair skin so that she'd be stained by his existence.

"Orsem..."

He hears her voice. Or rather, the ghost of it.

"Stop."

And now, he's begging her.

"Can't you just let me die?"

The overconsumption of alcohol must really be doing a number on him, if he can hallucinate about her to this extent.

"..."

His hand finally, finally finds his gun, and he holds it up to his head. But before he pulls the trigger, he speaks to her phantom amidst the haze of his addled brain.

"I loathe you deeply, you wicked woman." He vents, voice slurred and stuck in a staccato from the wine, spitting out his hatred and madness at her memory. "You could have chosen anyone else, I'm sure. You could have trapped them under your spell of honey and dreams, and made them save the world instead of me."

His hatred for her is real.

But maybe, the reason why things have turned out the way they did was because Orsem couldn't love her enough to save her first.

"Next time..."

His comm continues to light up with notifications even now, all detailing news and reports of the poison rain that continued to drum down on the land of Skyless.

"...Let that bastard fall in love with you, too. See how he likes it."

He pulls the trigger, knowing that even as he wishes for true death, it will not be granted to him.

Because as twisted as a form it may take, he still loves her enough to make everything more complicated.

His kisses carry no tenderness, only the primal urge to covet and affirm the existence of the young woman who holds his heart in her hands. He takes and takes and takes from her, as if it'd make up for all the pain he'd offered as a sacrifice.

It's her warmth that quells his anxiety, her hands that soothes his fears, and her sweet voice that makes him understand that he's become the sinner that he is today.

That's why he has no choice but to devour it all.

Understanding that this is all he can do, Orsem realizes that he has long forgotten what pure love was.

Ever since he'd lost Tilkett to that accursed Grimnal, his preconceptions of "love" has gradually become more warped, even though it was his source of strength.

Thus, he shall subject Yolca to all of the broken parts of him, as she so desires.