Cerize

In a darkened room, the flames of ten (plus a few more) candles on top of a round cake illuminated the space with their flickering light. People started clapping their hands and singing to the beat of the birthday song. What sort of expression should I wear at a time like this? Soshiro Yonaga hesitated. The right answer was probably a smile. He knew that much. And so, he plastered on a fake grin in the dim candlelight. At the end of the song, both parents clapped and exclaimed, "Happy birthday!" They both looked expectantly towards Yonaga who responded with, "Oh, right," as he leaned forwards and blew out the candles.

Did that flip the switch? "Wahhhh," a baby cried out. Everyone jumped as the flustered parents rose out of their seats and turned on the lights. The blinding reality of daylight was a total contrast from the candles earlier.

The baby being held in his mother's arms, Yonaga's much younger *half-brother, cried out louder and louder. Yonaga felt like he couldn't take it anymore and looked down at the birthday cake. It was still cloaked in the lingering smell of smoke. "…I need to go do some cram school homework so I'll have cake later." In the cheeriest voice he could muster, he then said, "Thanks for celebrating my birthday." He expressed his thanks as if it was a period on the conversation. His dad and the person who had become his mother called out to stop him, but the cries of his younger brother drowned out their words.

He returned to his room and leaned against the closed door. The sigh he let out was heavy as lead. "I…might have worried them." As he said it, he felt crushed by guilt. So he gave his head a big shake and sat down at his desk. Textbooks, workbooks, reference books. These were the sorts of things anyone his age would have. He picked one up and flipped through it. Perhaps a future might lie for him beyond those pages. "…" He shut the book. In frustration he scratched his head then sunk his weight into the back of the chair. All he got as he looked up to the ceiling was an oppressive feeling. Even as his eyes darted around the room, as if trying to escape it, there were always these four walls.

If things kept up like this, he would be continually stomped down until he grew smaller and smaller. Like the sort of tiny pebble one could find anywhere on earth. He felt suffocated. His chest hurt. So he closed his eyes. In the darkness, he found a light in his memory.

"I…" Yonaga sat himself up. He pulled out the desk drawer. A marble inside rolled around and made a noise in surprise. The drawer was full of all sorts of things adults would label as junk, just waiting there expectantly. He reached his hand deep inside it. There was a scene in his memory. It was just a few years ago, but it felt like something from long, long past. And yet, it felt so clear to him in that moment: the memory of kids having fun at a shrine.

"Kisa-chan, Tsuki-kun."Yonaga held the application form for Univeil Drama School in his hands. *********

The sky above him was vast. "Practice was awesome today, huh?" someone said in a loud clear voice. Yonaga naturally turned to look. The things that vividly stood out in his memory now just happened to be in front of his eyes. Over there was his childhood friend, Kisa Tachibana. And behind her stood the Univeil Drama School building.

Much like how he hid that application form in his drawer, he prepared for the entrance exams in secret and passed with flying colours. Now he was allowed to step foot in that very building. Just getting accepted into Univeil alone was like a dream come true for Yonaga. But he had the painful realization that the path ahead of him would be more treacherous than expected. It already was, even now.

As the fresh-faced first-years, they would be the ones taking the lead roles during the newcomers' performance. But some of them got roles while others didn't. The winners and losers in the class were already being decided. Yonaga had gotten a role like he hoped, but much of his inexperience came through as he tried to perform it. As a result, a sense of friction developed with his classmates.

Yonaga knew to expect these things from this kind of world. For the guy who by far spent more of his time watching other people than being watched himself, the stares of his classmates were heavy and painful. Strangely, he took things too seriously and yet sometimes wouldn't take in anything at all. There was no space to be found in his heart to put these things.

He was probably like this back then too: slouched shoulders, head low, holding his breath. But he told himself over and over that he had to set these things aside while at Univeil and just do it. His ability to think that way was no doubt due to Kisa.

Kisa, the girl who would sacrifice anything in the world to see out her dreams there, was now playing the role of a boy. Even through her indifferent words and her unconcerned expressions, she conveyed her level of passion for Univeil theatre. He was definitely not the only one affected by Kisa this way.

It was an individual practice day and almost all of the Quartz 78th class, his year, were gathered together. "Even though we started here 'bout a month ago, this might be my first time talking to anyone else in our year like this.” Suzu Orimaki spoke with a beaming smile. From day one, he treated everyone in the same bright friendly way. Yet even he seemed worried about his relationship with the others.

In response, Yonaga said, "It feels like there are a lot of walls between us," as he thought back on these words. (…Walls, huh?) He felt as if wherever he went, the walls would be the same. Could his choices even change this path? Should he just give up? But even though he was once alone inside those suffocating walls, now he had others to talk to under a sunny sky. He suddenly had a memory. About what happened that day. About his birthday.

After his brother's cries stopped and the house returned to quiet, he gently opened the fridge. One large slice of cake was left inside. He hated himself for even something like that making him feel so heavy. If that cake were here right now, how would that scene look? He still couldn't picture it well. Leaving home to live on his own was probably the best he could do for now. He took in a big breath.

In that room from before, the breaths he took over and over were heavy and dull. Now, in the clear Univeil air, he was worried whether he could even breathe it in well. But he wanted to.

"I really feel like we're going to be working together with the others a lot for the next three years." Kisa spoke up next to him while Suzu nodded. ――Today is a good day. Then, he suddenly thought, it's nice to have a birthday on a day like this. Despite that parts of himself that wished for so many things, for right now, this was enough.

*TL Note: the original JP word used here 義理の弟 is somewhat ambiguous between half-brother and step-brother (in some contexts it can also mean brother-in-law). But the Q&A used the phrasing 異母弟 which is much more clear as half-brother.

What I wanted to capture was Mitsuki's essence: that specific quality of quiet strength wrapped in gentleness, someone who observes more than they speak, who carries deep feelings beneath a calm surface. The snow-like piano pieces are supposed to reflect Mitsuki's introspective nature, that thoughtful distance he maintains while still being deeply present.

I especially focused on mixing Japanese neoclassical with soft indie folk music because it mirrors how Mitsuki bridges worlds:

traditional and contemporary, reserved yet expressive through performance.

I wanted this playlist to balance the feeling of solitude and longing for closeness. He's someone who exists beautifully in quiet moments but is also learning what it means to let people in, to share space with others (Kisa especially).

For the playlist art, the soft watercolor aesthetic with pale blues and delicate flowers (& Mitsuki gazing towards them) captures that same tender quality as the music.

The words I'd use to describe the feelings of this playlist: vulnerability, connection, the courage to be seen.

"Class is starting now." Sunshine trickled in through the windows with the scent of spring in the air. All students' eyes in the room were focused on the Quartz homeroom teacher, Rokuro Enishi. This is unusual, he secretly thought to himself. Sitting before him was the 78th class of Univeil Drama School, a freshly-enrolled brood of baby birds. Yet some of the students already had an impressively strong sense of presence. They were quiet, yet powerful. The student staring at him so intently, Kisa Tachibana, was one of them.

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After class ended, Enishi was headed back to the staff room. A lighthearted voice called out behind him. "How're the first-years doing?" Turning around, he saw the face of Sarafumi Takashina, Quartz's Al Jeanne. And there a bit behind him was Kai Mutsumi, the Jack Ace. "Wanna join a practice?" "The both of us aren't gonna have a lot of time to meet after next week. Now don't try to change the topic." The grin on Fumi's face looked much more childlike than the one he typically showed around his classmates.

"It's only been a few days since they started. I can't say anything notable about them just yet." "Hmm, y'know sometimes I can read people just at a glance. Will that work with you, I wonder." Fumi looked Enishi directly in the eye as if he were searching for something. "...Fumi, don't make extra hassle for our teacher," Kai warned. "But weren't you the one curious, Kai? About those kids from the entrance exams?" "We'll find out eventually." He neither confirmed nor denied the claim. It seemed Kai was also wondering about the first-years. "Well in any case, we made it to third-year, huh?" Fumi tilted his gaze upwards. He looked weighed down with far too much responsibility for his age. Kai did too. "Back when we were first-years, Tsuki was still around."

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Singing came in through an open window. Enishi naturally turned to see what it was and noticed Mitsuki Shirota in the courtyard. He decided it best not to bother him, but- "...Mr. Enishi?" Shirota noticed and looked over in his direction. Well this was a rare occurrence. Normally he just avoided making eye contact with Enishi. "Oh uh, sorry for calling your name out." Shirota grimaced as if he was also surprised by his own actions. "The other day I met this first-year here. Wait, why am I even talking about this?" Shirota's usually orderly mind was now strewn about in a confusing disarray. "Who?" "Huh? Oh, Tachibana. It was Kisa Tachibana." A first-year has only seniors in the classes above them, but a second-year has juniors below them to consider too. From this point forward, Shirota would have to confront things he had been trying to avoid. Would he reject the call when the time came for it, or....

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That evening, Enishi spotted Soshiro Yonaga carrying a stack of books. Nothing about him stood out as strange next to the other Univeil students. Nobody noticed him working to hide his childhood friend's secret. In class, he always looked quiet at a glance, but his words were interspersed with nuggets of creativity. But whether he turned out to be a polished gem or just the cruft to be thrown away remained up to him. Like digging up fossils resting in the earth, he had the capacity to dig up the talent that lay dormant in his thoughts. If he managed to pull it off, it would be a whole new world for him.

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"Oh, hello, Mr. Enishi!" A bright energetic voice passed him by. From the voice alone, he knew it was Suzu Orimaki. "This Univeil place is amazing! A whole day of acting classes! The day went by in a flash! And all the other guys are so talented! Some incredible singers! And dancers! And actors! And some I don't know too much about yet, but they're incredible too! Everything here is just...wow!" His words were cheerful but vague. But then, "Tachibana is one'a those ones. That guy's just...crazy good." On a hunch, he decided to keep his mouth shut on what he really wanted to say. "Uh I mean, I wonder how the newcomers' performance script is gonna turn out!"

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That should be my line, the class leader, Kokuto Neji, wanted to cry out in despair as he entered the staff room. Script submission deadlines were already long overdue. "The big event is at the end of next month and needs those freshly hatched newcomers as the leads. So I must ask you, Mr. Rokuro of Enishi, to introduce me to talent to suit my tastes!" Neji placed his hand on Enishi's desk and leaned in as if to say, 'now you've gotta tell me'. "Takashina said something similar too." "Oh did he now? And what answer did you give him, perchance?" "That classes only started a few days ago. It's too soon for me to say anything notable yet."

"But now you can tell little ol' Neji in private, right? You're sooo nice!" Neji's strength of will was quite remarkable. But Enishi's stance remained unchanged. "It's best for you to judge with your own eyes," he countered. "But I want a variety of different opiniooons," Neji persisted. "In that case, teacher, just tell me this," Neji raised his pointer finger as he spoke, "whose name has come up the most?" Without even needing a moment to think, one student came to mind. "Neji, about the script situation...." "Hey, that's bullying!"

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It was now night on the mountain. The hazy spring moon was cloaked in an angel's robe of clouds. While doing his final rounds before leaving work, Enishi headed towards the Quartz dorms, carrying the student register in hand. He wanted to check how the new students were adjusting to the unfamiliar living environment. They had probably finished dinner and were finally enjoying some free time. "Hm?" One student was just walking out of the Quartz practice room. It was Kisa Tachibana. Enishi quietly concealed himself. He could still see flickers of her girlish shadow as the moonlight shone under her feet. He vividly remembered the day Univeil's principal, Shuri Chuza, had told him about her. He didn't take that memory lightly. Enishi flipped through the student register as if waiting for her to walk past him. He didn't intend to treat her differently than any other student. Yet she still naturally stood out as someone special. Out of just this handful of days, hers was the name he had heard the most.