wild eyes.

    Birdie opened her mouth to say something else but stopped herself.  She let out a heavy sigh.

    “I shouldn’t’a snapped at ya.  Y’didn’t mean it.”

“Birdie, it’s fine.” Bambi knew she had shit going on. Fae being taken by the government, and the way in which it happened, had to be weighing heavy on Birdie’s mind. “You don’t gotta apologize for that shit, y’know that.”

   “Bambi, what the fuck?” Remi went after her. “I told ya I ain’t fuckin’ makin’ excuses. You asked why ‘n I’m tellin’ ya.”

   “I get that y’don’t understand what it’s like. I’m glad y’don’t, because bein’ an addict is hell. But don’t ask me to come all the way out here just to give me this fuckin’ talk-to-the-hand shit, ‘cause I really ain’t got time for that type’a childish fuckin’ game right now.”

Bambi stopped and listened to what Remi had to say. When he was finished she turned out, biting at the inside of her cheek. “You fucking disappointed me, okay?”

    “I’m not decapitating my gummy bears.  They don’t deserve that treatment.”  She reached for one of each nonetheless.  “I’ll just combine them in my mouth.”

“Fine, fine. No chopping heads off of the bears.” She held her hands up in defeat. “It is your birthday celebration after all.”

   “I’m a drug dealer. I offered a stranger a hit. She said yes.”

   “As for the rest, I’m a junkie, too. ‘N junkies’re selfish cunts. It ain’t somethin’ I’m fuckin’ proud of, but it is what it is. I wasn’t sober.”

“‘Course that’s your excuse.” It was a shitty excuse, and she could feel the conversation going nowhere. So she let out a sigh and shook her head, shrugging her shoulders. “I’m gonna fuck off now because this is pointless.”

   “I didn’t say y’couldn’t care. Don’t put words in my mouth. I said I ain’t apologizin’ to ya.”

    Harlee watched as Bambi took everything out of the bag and laid it out on the table, saying what it all was.  “Raccoon chocolates!” she exclaimed and even Colie seemed interested in those.     As Bambi got to the last bag, Colie sat forward and listened to everything the bag contained.  “Thank you!” she said, first looking at Bambi and then at Bunny.  Harlee ruffled Colie’s hair like Remi always did, though it pained her to do so.

    “Okay, so, what should we start with?  Sugar lips or champagne bears?  What do you guys think?”

“I think we could start with....champagne bears.”

   “That ain’t how it works, B. What happened was between Charlie ‘n I, ‘n how we worked it out’s between us as well.”

   “I thought you ‘n I were friends. Y’wanted to talk to me about this, you coulda come to me two years ago. But you decided y’didn’t give a shit when Charlie told ya we’d put it behind us, ‘n you decided I wasn’t worth your time. That I wasn’t worth even a single fuckin’ conversation to ya. So why should this be worth my time now?”

   “I love Charlie,” he continued, “I want ‘er to be happy. And I know that your feelings about me puts a strain on ‘er – so if y’wanna move on I’d be more than willin’ to – but I ain’t layin’ down like a doormat for you to fuckin’ step on when what you’re mad about has been put in the past by everyone except you. Especially considerin’ y’weren’t even involved. I’ve apologized to those who were affected by my actions.”

“You are such a piece of fucking shit. I decided to care about it the moment she told me. Which wasn’t at a time where she’d put it behind her.” 

“I am gonna say it.”

“It ain’t your business.”

“Except that it fucking is.”

     So much for bein’ polite, Remi mused to himself, a vague smile playing on his lips as he followed Bambi towards the back; and down they went, past a security checkpoint and down a hall into an empty room. She turned to face him and went straight to the point, a quality he’d always liked about her.

     When she finished, he felt near dumbfounded – mostly as to why she’d made him come all the way out here for something that she could’ve said in a text. Frankly, he had more dangerous, more important things to take care of back in the city. Maybe she wasn’t done. Maybe there was more.

   “Alright,” he replied, unsure if there was anything she really wanted him to add to the conversation. “Thanks?”

“Have you always been such a fucking dick? Actually- don’t answer that.”

Bambi felt incredibly stupid for not realizing it before. She’d thought he was good- and then she’d read all that shit. It was like a smack in the face. “Why the fuck would you do that to her?” She bit at the inside of her cheek, shaking her head. “And don’t say it’s not my business because it is. Harlee has done the same shit for me.” Harlee and Bambi always said they’d do anything for one another, and had proved it on numerous occasions.

    Birdie set her jaw.  She didn’t want to say anything unnecessarily hurtful and she knew she would if she opened her mouth again.  She stood there, arms crossed, and took deep breaths through her nose as she waited for Therese Talks A Lot to scurry off down the hall.     When she was gone, Birdie turned her gaze to Bambi’s.

    “Y’shoulda texted me.”

“I should have texted you, you’re right.” 

     It was a long drive from the city and out to the Resistance base that was the Haven, but when Remi had gotten a text from Bambi asking him to meet her there he could only assume it was important. She had’t talked to him in… what? A year? Two? And according to Charlie she’d had no desire to. What had changed?

     Though he was firmly opposed to the Government, he had never had any strong ties to the Resistance, and had only been out here a handful of times – usually to meet someone, like he was now. There were a few cars parked out front, but no major activity. Remi flicked the butt of his cigarette aside, exhaled the last of the smoke in his lungs and headed for the entrance.

     Inside, the place was a little more lively, but far from full, still, and he saw Bambi right away, sitting in a booth towards the back. He wondered as he approached whether they were staying in the main area, risking civilian eyes on them, or if she was taking him down and back into the network of tunnels and rooms that were built into the rock and the ground behind the roadhouse.

   “Hey, B,” he stopped next to her table. “How are ya?”

“Not here,” She said, getting up from the booth she was sitting in. Sitting up front opened them up to a lot of different dangers. Ones that she didn’t feel like worrying about. 

A few years back she would have thought herself paranoid. But things were different now. After everything that happened with Arden, and subsequently Ulrich, she’d grown weary of strangers around her. That wasn’t to say that she’d ever been particularly friendly or open towards them, but the events of the past 4 years had changed her. Ever since her face had been plastered around the city she’d been especially aware that people might recognize her. Talking about identifiable problems into front of civilians just wasn’t a good idea. 

    “What the fuck,” Birdie muttered under her breath as she opened her front door and headed down the hall.      She’d been waiting for Bambi for over twenty fucking minutes already and she was growing restless.  The longer she sat in her apartment, the more her mind filled with images of Bambi being taken before she got to the resistance cell, Bambi trapped with Ulrich again, Bambi’s lifeless body laying next to Faeryn’s.

    Not a hundred feet down the hall and she found her sister standing with someone else, both of them silent.  She suppressed the urge to scream as she marched over to the pair of them.

    “Is this what the fuck y’been doin’ while I sit on my ass waitin’ for ya?”

At first, she didn’t put two and two together. She was about to snap back at Birdie when it clicked in her mind. Birdie was on edge because of what happened with Fae. And it wasn’t like Bambi hadn’t disappeared before either. The anxiety that might cause was understandable. “I was waitin’ for you here.” She said calmly, not acknowledging her sister’s tone. “You really think I’d rather listen to Theresa Talks A Lot than be with you?”

    Harlee laughed.  “Yes, this is where Old Man Corbin lives.  It’s nice, right?”  She led them through the apartment and into the living room where Colie was waiting for them.  She was sitting sullenly with her eyes on the television screen as the movie played quietly.  “Look, peanut!  Visitors!”

    Colie looked away from the movie and Harlee paused it, then turned off the television.  “Hi,” Colie greeted Bambi and Bunny.  She sat up a little straighter and tried her best to smile brightly at them both.  Harlee kissed the top of her head.

    “Looks like they brought lots and lots of treats.  Do you wanna see what they have?”         Colie nodded her head.  “Yes, please.”

“Nice as f-” She cut herself off upon seeing Colie. “Fun. Nice is fun.” 

Bunny’s face lit up when she saw Colie. Her daughter nearly dropped the bags she had on her arms and ran over to her. At the last moment Bunny seemed to catch herself and gently placed them down, running over to her friend. Bambi picked up the bags, and placed everything on the nearby table so both Harlee and Colie could check it out. “So we got champagne gummy bears for Harls. The sugar lips, chocolate confetti, and raccoon shaped chocolates are for everyone.” She also had the pancake snacks for Colie, but wanted to save them until last. “Then we have some vegan food.” She gestured to it, not remembering which dish was named what. Most of it was bought, but she had tried her hand at making two. “And some non-vegan food.”

She knew that Harlee would want the guy she loved and her best friend to get along. Which was why Bambi, over the past few weeks, had been trying to work herself up to arrange a meeting with him. For Harlee’s sake she wanted to try and move past the issues she had with him. Finally, after a few weeks of telling herself she’d do it...she did it. She texted Remi and arranged to meet up at the Haven. Maybe they wouldn’t come out of the conversation the best of places, but one that was at least better than what Bambi was feeling now.