Fallen Soldier

'Sorry mate, sorry. Truly. Wasn't tryin' to scare ya I promise' He assured Xavier, assuming the most submissive pose that a wolf like himself could, sitting before the other with his head slightly lowered. At the why, he let out a low huff, his lupine equivalent of a shrug. 'Out for a run and just happened to see ya' He replied, a more amused huff leaving him now at the man's question.

'I would love, but ya gonna see a lot more of me than ya likely bargained for' Ciaran chuckled. 'How 'bout we head up to mine? Ain't so far from here, and I promise I won't say a word again till I'm on two legs'

The journey to Ciaran’s was awkward. They walked side by side, like owner and dog, not saying much. Xavier wondered if Ciaran felt the same but didn’t dare ask. “You really staying here for good, hm?”, he broke the silence with a more general question instead. “I thought with everyone else leaving… I don’t know, I thought maybe you would join them too”  

"It's alright," she said gently. "I didn't mean to intrude or anything like that," she said. "I was just out for a walk and here I am." She chuckled a little bit, shrugging her shoulders and allowing her hands to fall to her sides, shoving them in her jean pockets.

"What are you doing?" she asked curiously.

At her question, Xavier merely shrugged, pausing a few moments. “Not sure”, he admitted. Looking at the Mistress, he realized that he had not seen her before. But with the diminishing population, this would no doubt change in the future. “I went out for a run and found these on the way” He held out his pouch with coins. “Probably from people who left in a hurry” – or have too much to care.   “You?”

Had Xavier ever seen his wolf form? Ciaran for the life of him couldn't recall, and wasn't sure what was going to scare the hair off the man's sack first: seeing a huge-ass wolf right behind him, or hearing his voice in his head. Eh well, may as well do both.

'Aye, my ninja trainin' is payin' off then. Good to know' He projected, with a rumble of a chuckle, then was quick to reassure Xavier of who he was. 'Relax mate, it's just me'

“Jesus, Ciaran!”, Xavier cursed, quickly straightening himself. If he had paid a little more attention, perhaps he would have realized sooner that something was amiss. Cautiously, he eyed Ciaran’s wolf form and knew almost instinctively what the other must be thinking. Although it was technically not a fall, his posture had been no less comical. It was more than probable that a stupid joke had already been formed in his lupine brain.

“I’m getting too old for this kind of magic. Why-“ But he stopped himself just in time. Why what? Begrudgingly he remembered the conversations he had with Qhuinn and her wasted efforts to get him excited about her wolf form. He couldn’t blame them for being who they were but there was no denying that part of him wished that they were human. “Never mind” With a dismissive wave of the hand, he sat back down on the stone, pausing. “Can you shift? Hearing voices like this is the last thing I need”  

She saw someone near the fountain as she walked and made her way over just as he threw a coin into the water. "Sorry if I scared you, I've been told I'm pretty quiet." she said quickly. Sasha nodded to the fountain, "Did you make a wish?" she asked, stepping closer to the edge and looking into the water. "You'd think there would be a lot more wish-making on this island." she mused, when there were fewer coins inside than she expected. Then she turned to look at him and noticed the pouch. She looked at him quizzically, "Are you collecting coins?"

Thoughtfully, Xavier looked at her and eventually shook his head. “I wasn’t sure what to wish for” As he sat down on a stone, he listened to her response and her words about wish-making made him chuckle. “I’ve been here long enough to know not to trust any wish-granters”, he pointed out. Djinns came to mind straight away but there were others too. He was uncertain if it was due to the powers they held but any creature capable of granting wishes would only do so at a – usually hidden –cost. “Not really. I found them on the way here” Xavier held out the pouch, indicating for her to take it. “You can try your luck if you want”

"You might have cheated death, but I've defied it. I've died twice now. This is the third body I've occupied. My third chance at life." She took a long sip of her drink. Let him ponder over that and see if he'd heard it before.

"The first time I was burnt at the stake. It was only a matter of time, I was living in Scotland at the height of their witch hunts and had somehow made it to 91 years old. It was only a matter of time before the finger was pointed at me," though it was irritating to know Peter had actually been the one to officially throw her under the bus, or rather on the pyre. Still, she likely wouldn't have made it much longer if he hadn't.

"The second, I was sent back to the death realms by my vessel using the very spell I'd acquired to save her," there was a bit of venom behind her words, the betrayal still aggravating but Winter's feelings on the vessel still walking this island were complicated at best.

"Now I hope never to face death like that again," it was the very reason she came back to study necromancy. She took another sip of her whiskey.

“This is simply what you do”, Xavier dismissed the other as soon as it became apparent that, dream or not, he would be part of this scene for a little while longer. “No offense but you supernatural beings live by a different set of rules” He didn’t need another chance at life. He already made his choices. Yet the circumstances of his life often made him wonder if there was a larger force out there, something like a God, and if so, why they chose to send him back.

“How would I know?”  Uriel asked, growling softly at the lack of the required honorific.  “I am neither omniscient nor a deity.  I was tasked to guard this location so I do not know what is going on outside.”  Uriel started to turn away when the slave spoke again, drawing his attention back to the slave.  “Well, considering that I do not know why the power has gone out outside of speculation, I do not know what you could do to assist.”  He started to turn away before stopping and holding out his hand, a ball of light forming in his palm.  “Here, take that to the other side of the shelter and see if any others need light.  I can make a few of these for those that need it.”

His patience should be rewarded as just when Xavier believed that he would be left alone, the guard turned back to assign him a task. Magic never ceased to amaze him and he watched the ball of light with caution. To his surprise, the essence was not as fragile as it appeared and he could feel its weight in his hand, warming his palms slightly. It was perhaps the first time he was so close to a source of magic, at least discounting the series of punishments and events the Institute had dished out. And it was very much unlike himself to accept it so willingly. “I will be right back”, Xavier promised him, despite the feeling of strangeness within him. “Thanks”

"Haven't ya heard? I'm an evil killer. Boo.." He grumbled, before rewarding himself for that effort by draining his glass in one single long swallow.

His words were quiet, an honest sliver of his mind, his burdens. Though there was little to go on, Winter guessed at their root...

Survivors Guilt.

It was the mark of a truly empathetic person to carry your own luck as something requiring penance. Winter herself had never suffered such a burden. Peter had trained that out of her very early in her life. He'd nurtured her coldness and ruthlessness. Then, after her first death, after seeing the world she'd be doomed to without a vessel, Winter became a monster clawing at life with a desperation that superseded any guilt.

Still, she wasn't immune to grief, to the weight mortality could place on anyone reminded of it.

Easy. Xavier almost had to laugh out loud at that. Most people were in a terrible state and in a building that could easily collapse at any given time. Fortunately, life had shown him enough blood and terror for him not to be squeamish anymore, but that was all he could bring to the table. How was he supposed to know which injuries would be emergencies? Would they even be able to speak? But as he looked at Qhuinn, he found himself nodding without another word. He couldn’t do this to her, not now.

feel free to edit or elaborate as you please .   ( add  ‘ reverse ‘  to your message if you’d like to see how my muse would perform the action ) . otherwise , send in one of these for my muse’s reaction to   …

[ lit ]  your muse lighting a cigarette , spliff , etc. for mine . 

[ order ]  your muse ordering for mine at a restaurant or bar .

[ guide ]  your muse putting a hand on mine’s back to lead them .

[ pay ]  your muse paying for mine at a store , bar , restaurant , etc . ( you can specify where or for what . )

[ open ]  your muse opening a door for mine .

[ dry ]  your muse drying mine off with a towel after a shower , bath , swimming , etc . 

[ instruct ]  your muse giving mine instructions / telling them what to do . 

[ groom ]  your muse adjusting mine’s appearance , such as straightening a tie , fixing their hair , or buttoning their shirt for them , etc . 

[ direct ]  your muse taking mine by the chin and telling them to look yours in the eye .

[ disagree ]  your muse sternly telling mine  ‘ no ‘ .

[ rest ]  your muse resting their arm over mine’s shoulder / s .

[ clean ]  your muse cleaning a smudge of something off mine’s cheek , forehead , etc .   feel free to specify what and how . 

[ answer ]  your muse answering a question meant for mine . 

[ coat ]   your muse holds mine’s coat out for them while they put it on .

[ pilot ]  your muse taking mine by the arm , hand , shoulder , etc . to lead them . 

[ stare ]  your muse staring mine down . 

[ placement ]  your muse telling mine to sit down .

[ teach ]  your muse taking control of mine’s hand , arm , hips , etc . to make sure they do something correctly .  

[ patience ]  your muse telling mine to be patient .

[ tears ]  your muse wiping away mine’s tears .

[ swat ]  your muse swatting mine’s hand away from something they’re not supposed to touch .  

[ jewelry  ]  your muse clasping a piece of jewelry for mine , such as a necklace , or earrings . 

[ enough ]  your muse commanding mine to stop talking . 

[ retrieve ]  your muse requesting or ordering mine to retrieve them something .

[ invite ]  your muse inviting mine to sit on their lap .

[ lean ]  your muse inviting mine to lean into their side while they’re sitting or laying together . 

[ calm ]   your muse telling mine to  ‘ just breathe ‘ .

[ scold ]  your muse scolding mine for something .

[ comfort ]  your muse pulling mine into a reassuring hug .

[ approval ]  your muse complimenting mine on a choice they’ve made .

[ beckon ]  your muse beckoning mine to them without speaking . 

[ laces ]  your muse lacing , tying , or zipping something for mine , such as shoes , a dress , or a jacket , etc .

[ stay ]  your muse telling mine to stay in the car . 

[ defend ]  your muse defending mine’s reputation , dignity , or safety for them . 

[ feed ]  your muse feeding mine something , feel free to specify what .

[ volume ]  your muse demanding mine speak louder .

[ read ]  your muse reading something to mine .

[ refill ]  your muse refilling mine’s glass for them . 

She hadn't anticipated his apology or changed answer. She weighted his words and they felt more true than anything she'd told herself late at night. She was a bad person, selfish and vengeful and proud, but she wasn't evil. She was a beast made by the hands of other monsters.

She felt more settled now, which was likely why something snagged her attention from his earlier words.

Her questions made him cringe and Xavier was reminded why he came to drink in the first place. Winter wasn’t as self-absorbed as he had once believed. She even had more wits and courage than he’d given her credit for.  This was a wonderful revelation; He only wished that he was more ready for it.

"Aww, a basket of beer! Ya know the way to this man's heart love" The wolf chuckled, a brow quirking at the way Xavier looked him over. He was pretty sure it wasn't in a checking him out kind of way but that didn't stop him from striking a dorky pose before dropping down next to the other and greeting him with a knock to the shoulder as he took the offered bottle. "Darlin', I'm fine. Really. Just bloody confused if I'm bein' perfectly honest. What in the good goddamn is goin' on here?" Ciaran asked, as he nearly choked on his beer at the question. "No...why?" This was getting more bizarre by the moment...

Only a faint smile painted his features as his friend posed for him. There was a brief moment of wonder if he could perhaps seduce the man to keep him away until the week was over but this idea was short-lived. Xavier could not lie to him and Ciaran would see right through him. And so he was left to his usual, honest ways. “You’re not confused. You’re fucking blind. Or hexed. I don’t know which one yet” He sighed. “Because that’s how she uses her magic. Watch her put candy in her mouth and you’ll be in pain the moment after” But, of course, that sounded crazy to someone who apparently witnessed nothing odd. Xavier looked up at Ciaran intently. “You should stay with a friend if you don’t want to kick her out. Please, you just have to trust me on this one”

“I just..wanted to help. Simple as that” Evie remarked softly, shrugging. “I figured even if it was someone who didn’t like me, or who I didn’t get along with, I would just give them their space. I have a full enough class load and my shop so I’m not home a lot anyway. So..it’s just an opportunity for someone to sleep in a real bed and have some privacy for a week. I would add homecooked meals to that but I have a feeling whatever they have in the cafeteria would be better than whatever disaster I would try to cook up. But you’ll have your choice of takeout!” She laughed. “Well..I’m going to grab a quick shower. Make yourself at home. Please. The takeout menus are in the drawer next to the fridge. And feel free to talk to my sugar gliders! Rufus is the brown one, and Titania the white” And with that, she gave Xavier one more shy smile then went across the narrow hallway to her own bedroom.

She just wanted to help. Xavier repeated the words in his mind. Why did people think helping was so damn easy? Why not simply help someone they knew? It didn’t take a raffle for Evie to take someone into her home. And there were a dozen other people who would be more grateful and more wanting of this help. But he said none of that. He already spent enough time around her to know that voicing these doubts would only upset her. Besides, there was nothing that could be done about this decision now. “I’m shit at cooking too. Sorry to disappoint”, he said instead and grabbed the stack of menus she mentioned. He would offer to pay but was promptly reminded that he had no job – and thus no money. “You got a preference?”, Xavier called after her but Evie was already gone.

And so Xavier was left pondering. The sugar gliders eyed him suspiciously, or maybe hoping that he would order something they liked too. “Forget about it, mate. I don’t even know what you are”, he heard himself mutter towards their direction before picking up the phone. Pizza felt like a safe choice. He ordered a large one to share and a salad, just in case, and waited for either Evie or the delivery guy to join him.

She just wanted to help. Xavier repeated the words in his mind. Why did people think helping was so damn easy? Why not simply help someone they knew? It didn’t take a raffle for Evie to take someone into her home. And there were a dozen other people who would be more grateful and more wanting of this help. But he said none of that. He already spent enough time around her to know that voicing these doubts would only upset her. Besides, there was nothing that could be done about this decision now. “I’m shit at cooking too. Sorry to disappoint”, he said instead and grabbed the stack of menus she mentioned. He would offer to pay but was promptly reminded that he had no job – and thus no money. “You got a preference?”, Xavier called after her but Evie was already gone.

And so Xavier was left pondering. The sugar gliders eyed him suspiciously, or maybe hoping that he would order something they liked too. “Forget about it, mate. I don’t even know what you are”, he heard himself mutter towards their direction before picking up the phone. Pizza felt like a safe choice. He ordered a large one to share and a salad, just in case, and waited for either Evie or the delivery guy to join him.

winters-lust​: 

There was silence, though he wasn’t sure for how long. Much like her, he seemed to get caught up in his own thoughts. In the previous weeks, it became increasingly harder to untangle them and to find his way back to the present. Looking at the glass was just another way of stalling time, to appear normal in the company of others. Sometimes he wondered if it was possible to get stuck forever. Would he become mad if he allowed himself to?

Winter seemed much more shocked by his acceptance to drink rather than his silence. It made him wonder if he had been right to hesitate, though he did not comment. If she wished to trick or harm him, ultimately, there was nothing he could do. And where did such thoughts come from, anyway? She’s never harmed him. “That’s a shame”, Xavier sighed eventually, leaning back against the cushions. He was not a frequent visitor but remembered that they had been much closer when she still threw parties regularly. “You were good at those. I think it gave people comfort” He burned his throat again, then set the glass on the table, thinking that she probably should have brought more if she wanted to get them both drunk. At her response, a small, half-dry, half-kind chuckle sounded from his lips. “This place really is fucked up if I was the only person to tell you ‘no’ and mean it”

His eyes found hers, then landed back on the bottle, on the table. How had it come this far? Xavier felt dirty for being so unjust, for needing the alcohol to relax, maybe. How had they managed to tease and play and show affection just one year ago? “Go on, ask me something too”, he urged her then, only a tad out-of-character. “This is never going work if you don’t distract me”

Winter bowed her head at his words about her party skills. That's how she'd seen it too, throwing decadent and salacious parties for everyone to let go. Now she wondered if that was the truth. Was everyone letting go or was she justifying another twisted act. She could no longer look at her past objectively. It all warped and twisted until she could no longer see what had really happened.

She gave a humorless laugh shortly after his. "You have no idea," she agreed without further explaining. Instead she took a swig of her own drink to dull her twisting gut.

She tried to think of a question more like her old self to ask. She stalled by topping up Xavier's drink a bit after noticing his eyes take in the bottle. When she finished, she still couldn't think of anything fun and diverting, so instead she asked...

Once they got to her place, she let Xavier and Remus greet each other and shuffled into the kitchen to put on a pot of coffee. “Look..there’s something that I want to talk to you about. Before the silly stuffing and whiskey and movies. And I want you to really think about it before you tell me no. Can..you promise me that? Please? It’s..really important to me Xavier. And yes I know I already played that card to get you here. But deal” She smiled tightly, pouring a steaming mug for each of them as she waited for Xavier’s promise. Or flat out refusal to even hear her out. Not that that would matter..

He sat down by the kitchen as Qhuinn started to make coffee. The smell was perhaps the nicest he had sensed since the punishment. Xavier realized there weren’t many nice things that happened since the punishment, and hearing the she-wolf talk as she did, he began to suspect that she had brought him here for a reason. He sank deeper into his seat, head resting against his hands, expecting terrible news. “Then you already know I don’t wanna hear it”, Xavier frowned. What could possibly be so important that he needed to know now!? “OK. I’m ready. What is it?”  

He sat down by the kitchen as Qhuinn started to make coffee. The smell was perhaps the nicest he had sensed since the punishment. Xavier realized there weren’t many nice things that happened since the punishment, and hearing the she-wolf talk as she did, he began to suspect that she had brought him here for a reason. He sank deeper into his seat, head resting against his hands, expecting terrible news. “Then you already know I don’t wanna hear it”, Xavier frowned. What could possibly be so important that he needed to know now!? “OK. I’m ready. What is it?”