i'm not sorry

“ Well to be fair and give credit where credit is due, like three percent of you are okay. But the other ninety-seven need to be sent off to an island of Amazons for one hundred years of reconditioning the species.” She laughed. “Honestly I think I’ll be off dates for a hot minute and focus back on work for a while , just to wash the taste of this one out of my mouth so I don’t go into the next one with a clipboard and a checklist.” Laughing, she took a sip from her glass before her eyes lit up.  “Yes! Dinner, yes!  Here for it. Honestly I have been living off Lean Cuisine and Hungry Man dinners and no gym for like two weeks so I could use a not-frozen meal as much as could use half an hour on a treadmill. But .. She paused to snort. “Just to be clear, am I the one who can’t make dirty jokes? Because that’s gonna be really difficult for me. Notice I said difficult and not hard because that one was too easy.”

“That is if the 97% can survive at least a quarter of that century. Reconditioning.” He scoffed, knowing fully well it’s what the world needs now that their country, one of the most influential countries in the world, is run by a fucking joke. “Anyway!” He gave Hayley a smile that only grew wider when she accepted his dinner invitation. “Oh god, ew. I’m not judging your diet but, ew. We need to get you a real dinner, Hayley. You can bring your clipboard and your checklist for all I care, you need a real dinner. I can bring you something homemade. You pick the place or I do? And nahh, you can make dirty jokes, you get a pass from that last date you had.”

Loo’s eyes met his, as they always did, and she was once again shocked at how she didn’t cringe away at the eye contact. “Yeah, of course I’m sure. Wouldn’t be a point without you there.” Her blatant honesty never seemed strange to her, even though people often told her to hold more back and choose what she said carefully; she just couldn’t find the time. She feared for a few moments that he would reject her offer, and she knew if he did she would undoubtedly throw the empty list away and never mention it again to anybody. It never took much to take Loo to a dark place — but it took even less to take her to a high place, which was where she went when Warren agreed and signed his name. “’Course you can! You can even choose the snacks if it means you’ll show up.”

And there it was, her bright smile. It looked the most genuine he’s ever seen, too. He hasn’t even gotten hold of any book but he was already loving his decision. Proud of himself, even more. He couldn’t wait to tell Bethany, his sister, pretty much the only sibling who’d relate to him once he announces what he did today. Warren smiled even more that looking happy became an understatement. “I can choose the snacks too? Just how many good things am I getting out of this?” He chuckled. “When are we starting? I put my cell there but that’s my business number. I can give you my personal so I can see your text right away. That alright?”

     “You’re sweet and I wish it were that simple but no… I’m talking about my husband. He died and i’m feeling sorry for myself after a long day, so!” Ava pulled out a chair for him. “Sit. If you still want to?”

A little nod was Alex’s only response to Warren’s repetition. He couldn’t go back to Scotland - no matter how much he desperately wanted to, for more reason than one — he never could. Not for a long while, anyway. A really long while. Alex raised his brows in almost shock - who didn’t want compensation? Especially spending time with his own miserable personality — he figured anyone would want money for that. “Oh,” he said, a little taken aback but accepting Warren’s excitement all the same. “Alright, then. Fair enough.”

He couldn’t stop the smile that spread a little across his lips when Warren swept past him. It wasn’t often that anyone at the station was excited about questioning someone, and it was a refreshing feeling to have a lively spirit around. “Thanks, Warren,” Alex said, once he followed him into the interrogation room. He didn’t think ‘Mr. King’ fit the young man; it reminded Alex too much of Warren’s father. “Y'know - y'could even intern here,” he continued, with a tiny sparkle of humor in his eyes. Even though it came off as a joke, Alex wouldn’t have minded having Warren along at the station.

"I swear chief, I'm never gonna dread working with you. Loosen up!" He smiled and almost put a heavy yet comforting hand on the police chief's shoulder. Almost. Good thing he ha time to hesitate. HE didn't think they were close enough for him to break through personal boundaries like that.

    “ No, um… seat’s not taken. Not anymore. ” 

His response immediately puts her at ease, and she can’t help but chuckle at his confession about her threat. She lolls her head to the side and then nods toward him. “Fighting isn’t so hard– you’ve gotta at least know how to throw a punch, I mean– come on.” She encourages, already pouring him the drink that she’d suggested to him a few minutes before. As he requests for her coworker’s attention, or rather, help in seeking it. She’s not sure she understands. Technically they had an extra set of hands tonight, some girl that Ivy had taken pity on and given a shot. She’s not sure if he means her or Maya. She slides the drink over and leans forward, “What? Like Maya– or the new girl– cause if you mean the latter– I don’t know how much sway I’ve got.” She pauses, rotating her jaw. “But I’m pretty sure Maya wouldn’t need too much convincing all things considered.”

“Of course I know how to throw a punch!” He sat back, lifted his fists up to his chin and swayed in his seat like he was ready to fight. Broke out of character just two seconds after and laughed lightly as he watched Emma pour him a drink. “Dodging, however. Boy do I hope they’d at least spare my face.” He took the drink in his hands and leaned forward when she did, so he could hear her better. “Oh no, not the new girl.” He replied defensively. “It’s---it’s Maya. Not because you said she wouldn’t need to much convincing, please don’t get me wrong. It’s just... I don’t know. I’m not crazy about her but if it’d be nice to talk to her.” He shrugged shyly. Not really used to asking people for help when it came to girls. Or when it came to everything. “You don’t hear requests like this all the time, do you? Because I’d hate to be one of those boys.”

“Now things are getting interesting,” he mused, brims curving upward and a smirk forming on his face. “What’s that secret talent you have there? If it’s good enough it might change my mind.” He nodded at the statement, that was something Dominic could wholeheartedly agree with. “And that’s why I listen, but never talk,” he pointed out.

Seeing Dominic’s smirk put a big grin on Warren’s face. He lacked that playful side, and it’s what he’s always admired about the Armada boy. He was starting to regret responding the way he did --- it was hard to keep up with Dominic’s personality. “How good is good enough for you? Because mine could be a little boring for your standards.” He chuckled and nodded along. “Yeah I guess it’s better to be on the knowing side, for a change.”

“You know the older one is supposed to be nice right? Even if their younger siblings temporarily forgot where the hell they were.” She scoffed, even if she would be the first to admit she’d lucked out when it came to siblings. Especially Warren, without him to run to when she needed someone to talk to, she wasn’t sure how far she would have got. Following him to the seat next to the window, she smirked over at him. “Noted, I’ll be sure to buy you all spa vouchers in time for finals.” She nodded as seriously as she could, though it wasn’t a completely ridiculous idea. She might do it anyway, just to do something nice. They might have all had the money to go themselves, but sometimes it was just better when it was a gift. “The proudest.” She laughed, placing her hand over her heart. “The restaurant being busy is a good thing, right? People clearly like what you’re doing with it.” 

“I am nice to you 24/5! Let me have two days of break from that.” It was true though. The older one is supposed to be nice and Warren is the oldest of four siblings. It was his responsibility to look after them, to be there for them during times when their parents can’t. But that didn’t mean he did it only for that reason --- he loved his siblings. Warren had closet arrogance, thinking he’s better than anybody else because he’s a member of the King family. But he was willing to put that aside if it meant being there for his family. “It is a good thing! I think I care more about how it doesn’t stress me out like it used to. You saw how it ruined me the first year, remember?" He laughed, remembering how often his office reeked of liquor and self-loathing. “Hurry up with your law degree so I can stop playing safe and run the restaurant a bit rebelliously and have you to bust me out of any trouble.” 

“Well excuuuuuuse me for not wanting to assume your gender! God, you can’t please people these days…” She scoffed jokingly. “Well, if you are indeed male then you do in fact have cooties. It’s just fact. I have it on good authority that you went to Jupiter to get more stupider, too.” She laughed. Reaching for her glass and sipping her wine, Hayley started making her way back to her stool glancing over her shoulder with a chuckle. “Um, you’re really settling me about for a not PC joke and I really wish you wouldn’t put me in this position.  It’s not my fault, I’m on the internet almost all day and offensive jokes just come naturally to me.”

He knew she was chill. Well, maybe for most people she’s not --she’s a YouTuber for christ’s sake. She has encounters with trolls and snowflakes on a daily basis. If he had this conversation with her 5-6 years ago, he would’ve felt offended. Not now. Now that Warren’s become a little more socially aware. “Well thank god for Jupiter, then. How else would I learn that males could be any more stupid than we already are?” He laughed. He took a sip of his glass of wine and laughed. God he could talk to her about social issues all day and not get tired of it. “Putting all that aside though! Careful with your next date. If you need a witness to back you up when you had to be all crouching tiger on a perv, I can be that witness. Or if you want, you can take me to dinner instead. No sexual jokes --- that’s a guarantee.”

A deep sigh rolled off Alex’s lips, and his shoulders slumped a little. It wasn’t the conversation, or the cold cases, or even the bad coffee the station produced that had him in such a slump; he hadn’t had a good night’s sleep in months, and it was starting to really affect him. “Yeah,” he replied simply, his accent building in strength as his tiredness grew. He double-looked Warren then, opening his mouth a little. “I sound scary?” His lips turned downward as if in thought. He listened to the rest of what the young man had to say. “I don’t plan on going anywhere,” he said, shrugging a little and allowing the smallest of sad smiles to creep onto his face. “I’ve got nowhere else to go." 

Then he wiped his face of emotion and nodded. He glanced down at his watch, then at the door; he had plenty of people to find and question, and not a lot of time to do it. "Alright, then. If you’re sure.” He walked towards the door, glancing back at Warren and laying out the game plan. “We’ll start with the most important and work our way down, that way —” He thought of something, turning to the young man again. “Y'know, I’m sure the station will compensate you for your time here, if you want. Might make spending the day with me worthwhile.”

Warren tried his best to ignore the tiredness that showed on the older man’s posture. He’s been around busy men too many times to know when one is sleep-deprived, or when one has just got off a whole day’s deskwork. “Nowhere else to go?” A pause as he debated whether or not he was gonna ask what the police chief meant. He decided he wasn’t.

She glances in the direction he’d nodded towards and heaves a sigh of relief. “My bad– most people that come in here have a usual– anyone who lingers tends to have ulterior motives,” She confesses, leaning toward him. “Personally, I’m a big fan of whiskey– if you want it mixed I’d say Irish whiskey is good with ginger ale,” She suggests. “And really Warren I’m sorry– I shouldn’t have assumed.” She apologizes. “Kind of reacted without thinking.”

Seeing her reaction change, Warren felt guilty for responding the way he did. Of course she’d react like that. She would deal with assholes every day, and there’s no telling when she’ll get a shift without one pain in the ass trying to get her number. “It’s okay, Emma. I mean, you threatened to break my arm ---that scared the shit out of me. I know almost nothing about fighting.” He chuckled, fiddled with his fingers as he leaned forward on the bar. “You could make it up to me by helping me get on your colleague’s good side though,” he said in a low voice, his smile void of malice and arrogance. “If she thinks I’m cute ---or, okay more than cute, I swear to god, Em i’ll be paying for a round of everyone’s drink tonight.”

❝ Anytime Warren, your boy Mateo’s got you ❞ He was more than happy at how well received his words were  ❝ No, no- I promise you don’t look miserable, I just thought I’d share some of the good stuff I know. They say misery loves company, well happiness likes company too so… I’m sharing ❞

Loo bit her lip as she realized she had just said too much, too quickly. Warren was always nice about it, though; other people would get angry, tell her to shut up or slow down, and sometimes they’d just leave and she’d get another job strike for running off another customer. She never worried about that with Warren, though — he was kind-hearted, and Loo was slowly realizing that he was the only man in her life that she trusted. “Yeah, but that’s the point of a book club! To get people to enjoy reading, y’know? And oh, I have plenty of books lying around my desk. It’s like a leather-bound to-do list!” She was smiling again, her eyes alight with imagination.

No matter how over-enthusiastic she gets, Warren never once thought she was too much. Nor that she’ll ever be too much. His generation thinks apathy is a cool thing ---they forget that there’s something much more satisfying in hanging out with someone who isn’t afraid of showing emotions. “Are you sure? I swear, Loo, I could take forever to finish it. But...” He bit his lip, thinking it over. The gears in his mind started running, mentally scanning his schedule for that week. It wouldn’t hurt to try, would it? And looking at Loo, it broke Warren’s heart to imagine the look on her face if he turned it down. Taking the pen, he shook his head as he smiled and signed his name. He gave the list back to Loo and said, “Can I at least choose a genre? A... general fiction?”

“you’re better than me that’s for sure.” the woman admits with much conviction in her tone. she had been pegged as the judgemental type once or twice before, but she could never fully get down with that label. clara liked to consider herself someone who enjoyed having every piece to the puzzle, even the ones that were left over. for every drunk quip or story reveled, she believed it would always be with reason and somehow in the end make sense to things that had yet to come full circle. warren was an interesting being, beyond his surname he had much more to offer than the easy label that had been placed upon him. even she knew that he was much more than the pretty rich boy who many people assumed had minimal problems. “no, no, not yet. but i think anyone can experience one of those after a few too many bad decisions and too much alcohol. it just goes hand in hand.” 

“Me? Better than you? Hang on, I’m actually better than you in something? Well, I’ll drink to that.” He smiled so wide as he raised his bottle of beer for a clink. Paying attention to her body language, Warren thought it was nice that she looked like she was telling the truth. Saying things she actually meant. This is one of those moments when he thinks, just how lucky am i to have the chance to be this close to her? “Oh, cool. I guess we can say we’ve only reached the latter, no? I’m not entirely great with decisions but at least the worst decision I’ve made this year so far is that one time I approved an outside event over the restaurant without checking if it was gonna rain or not. Remember that? My men had to rush all the equipment to my sis’ club. A last-minute change of venue. That was crazy.” And he didn’t even realize he was already rambling.

Placing her hand on her chest to be equally dramatic, Hayley gasped. “You’re a male?! I would never have known had you not told me. Good heavens!” She chuckled. “I’m too nice? Now there something I don’t hear every day. I think you’re just biased cause you have a crush on me, obviously.” She teased, shrugging her shoulders. Sure she tried not to judge people and give them the benefit of the doubt, but it didn’t always work out in her favor. Gasping again for real, she shot up from her chair and straightened her posture. “I am five-foot-eight! That is above average for a woman! I am not smol. Just because you’re a freaking giant doesn’t mean everyone else isn’t average height. Don’t make me practice those self defense techniques on you.”

“I know right?? I can’t believe I had to point that out for you! But I’m happy to have provided you that brand new information.” When she mentioned the word crush, Warren didn’t know how to react. It wasn’t completely true, but it wouldn’t be a lie either. He may have never seen her like that, but she was a good friend and he’s always admired that. Hiding his face into his hands, his chuckle showed with the slight shake of his shoulders. “Now you sound twelve! Next thing I know you’ll be accusing me of having cooties.” Warren openly laughed when Hayley straightened up. “The thing is!” He held up his index finger to excuse himself because he was laughing in-between his sentence. “It’s not self-defense if I didn’t do anything physically threatening! There’s no danger for you, just danger for me. It’ll be assault, although I think I’d like to see these techniques in action. I think it’d be interesting to have an activist like you as my bodyguard.”

“Are you sure we’ve even met before?” She asked, looking over at him in distrust before a smile broke out on her face. “Almost? Are you saying my acting skills aren’t up to par? If you are, I am very offended.” She finished turning her nose up slightly as he walked past her, using the time to hit refresh once more. “I’ll have the same please.” She smiled at the barista, figuring it seemed quicker that way and it saved her trying to work out what it was she wanted. “We’re supposed to get the feedback from our last assignment today.” She explained, using every bit of her willpower to put the phone into her bag, so she could focus on Warren. “The longer I go without seeing the grade, the more time I have to convince myself I failed miserably. I honestly don’t know how any of you managed to spend time around me during finals. I feel like I should buy you all a trophy for getting through that.” No matter how many good grades she’d gotten over the years, without fail, she still convinced herself she failed everything. Especially since anything besides an A was basically a fail mark to her. “But enough about me, how is your day going? Please tell me you have something more interesting going on? Or even make something up.” 

“Yeah, almost. Be offended please, that was my purpose. Given you’ve offended me by forgetting I’m here!” He said, carrying on the joke. Even making the effort to clutch his chest dramatically. Their order came up faster than he expected. Or maybe he was just caught up with his sister’s reply to his question. Warren handed Bethany’s cup to her and led them to a table by the window. “What, a trophy for getting through your stressed out days? We don’t need trophies for that, sis. We need monthly full-massage sessions. That’s what we deserve.” He laughed, a little too louder than he intended. He didn’t need to look around to realize that a few people turned to his direction. “But seriously, it couldn’t be that hard? Come on, keep your phone in your bag. You have the rest of today to worry about your feedback. Right now, we’re here to relax.” Closing his eyes, he slowly took a deep breath through his nose and exhaled just as slow. When he opened them, it was the exact same moment Bethany asked how he’s been doing. His mission to relax got replaced with excitement. “Can you believe I just fucking joined a book club? Me! Things have been real fast at the restaurant, I don’t have time -or the patience- to finish one book but I still joined. Are you proud of me yet or what?”

 Standing in line at the local coffee shop, Bethany’s attention was placed firmly on the phone in her hand, instead of what was happening around her. The feedback from her latest essay was supposed to be emailed at any minute, and that had put her on edge. Frantically just refreshing her emails waiting for the notification to appear, she froze when she realized she’d somehow made it to the front of the line and still hadn’t made up her mind about what she wanted. Turning to the person behind her, she offered them the most polite smile she had. “Do you want to go first?”

“Just how busy are you with that thing to forget it’s your brother behind you? Almost bought that polite smile though. If you want me to pay for it you can just tell me, you know.” He chuckled and playfully brushes her aside as he stepped closer to the counter. Both Warren and Bethany are regulars in the coffee shop, or so he thinks. Given the amount of time she has to stay up to study, it doesn’t take a genius to realize that she goes here often. But most of the crew were new, so for the first time in days, he had to actually say his order. “Iced latte please, yeah that’s it. And give us a few seconds, my sister’s still deciding.” He told the crew before turning to Bethany. “Is it about school?”