would i still

be the one

to make dinner?

step up or

is

nothing

the bad place

is going to end

believe the worst

of me

because it’s easier

than doing any

week

just

gets

but then

weaponise

everything.

a deliberate act

of undressing the soul

to ensure i could be put back

into the space you needed

to rip off the bandaid knowing

i wouldn’t run?

i am just not

destined for

motherhood.

(quieter:

maybe

i am not

wholly. will see you and want

that life and won’t want to wait.

won’t want to drink instead.

when it is sexualised.

know the answer anyway.

line eyes from staring too hard;

cry on the sofa secretly.

i’ve been hot 0 days this month.

smoke will scorch the sky.

black boots and rage;

inside me there is an alligator

that has never tasted flesh.

of the walls;

choose poorly