Here are the Monsters you Ordered

A Japanese Demon capable of folding space, domesticated by Halflings and ridden into battle. A Warp Oni.

A giant burrowing insect which hatches from an ovum that resembles the Egyptian crux ansata. An Ankh-Egg.

Inspired by the Thriller music video, an insane wizard has revived the corpse of Michael Jackson. It turns out that the zombie is super into the old school rules and doesn't care for this newfangled "Base Attack Bonus" stuff, so the tabloids have taken to calling him "THAC0 Jacko".

A quick dinky guy who can run about at will without provoking attacks of opportunity. His salary is brought in by rolling around in public, amusing all in sight and filling his hoard with up to 3d6 gold coins a day. No consonant draws his wrath, but his sight must not find a particular monogram, thus all know him as "Tha Tumblr."

An Irish Treant who spends all his time in the sea and has grown a fish tail as a result. His family name is Murphy, but people call him the Murph Oak.

After the local constabulary have collected the evidence from the many crime scenes where roving bands of murderous psychopaths calling themselves "adventurers" have murdered and looted, they summon the metallic bull who cleans things up by saying "Bring in the Gore-gone".

A band of cat person bards who find it hard to play their instruments with their backwards hands but nonetheless tour under the name Rock-shasa. The hyphen is a lightning bolt, BTW.

An equine mount appropriate for small sized creatures made of Italian cream cheese which an insane wizard made really heavy and added wheels and an internal combustion engine to so he could call it a Mass-Car-Pony

An apiary designed to keep its honeymaker moneymakers safe in the anti-magic field emanating from its large central eye known simply as a Bee Holder.

A vessel which, when filled with spaghetti, animates it and begins engaging in devilish mischief. Science says it can't exist, so legend calls it The Impossible Imp-Pasta-Bowl.

A betentacled feline who decides where the souls of the damned will reside within the sixth through ninth circles of Hell. Dante called it something Italian but it translates to Dis-Placer Beast.

A half-orc who travels from house to hours waging a battle against vermin of all types but specializing in termites. The business card he leaves reads "The Orc-kin Man".

After the trees democratically choose who among them will become a Treant, but before the winners are inaugurated, the Secret Service is on high alert for a brain with legs known as an Ent-Elect Devourer.

The animated corpse of Luke Skywalker’s gunner from the Battle of Hoth who actually survived being shot and then crushed by an AT-AT, but was killed by a touch of pure evil which turned his skin gray and elongated his face. In his post-life he has taken up archery, giving him the appellation "Bow Dack".

A cord holding up a small vessel containing Sodium Hydroxide which turns into a wolf during the full moon. Folks call it the Lye Can Rope.

An enjoyable series of plays-on-words about clergywomen spoken by a kobold so powerful, even his minor utterances get statblocks. This one is under the header "Fun Pun-Pun spun nun pun run".

An outsider resembling a giant humanoid toad who rules as dictator for life of the Roman republic, addressed by his friends and countrymen as "Caesar Slaad".