Phrog Town

21+

queer and deeply neurodiverse.

I answer all asks unless they’re actively harmful

they/them, ✨genderless✨

I deleted a picture of us yesterday because it made my heart ache

I want to start writing again. I can’t keep track like I used to though.

Gotta be low-effort in order to be sustainable. So here goes.

Anniversary is on the 2nd. I have a lot of ideas but no time or energy

I love her so much and I hate how my disabilities limit how much I’m able to show her my love. I feel like acts of service and gift giving are escaping from my grasp (on account of: no job, no money, no energy or strength or ability) and it’s so discouraging. I need to just talk to her about it.

I haven’t worked in over a year and I still don’t “feel better” on account of,, I’m disabled and will never be able to work. All my disabilities work together to make most things impossible.

Had nose surgery and it was a very remarkable case for him because my nose was profoundly fucked lol

It’s 1am on the 16th actually lol,

Hi

After a month, I’m finally feeling a little better. From an arthritis flare, to a stomach bug, to migraines (I get vestibular migraines), and now FINALLY I am feeling somewhat normal again (as normal as I can while still being deeply disabled)

I still have to be super careful all the time and make sure I’m not triggering anything but I am feeling really blessed and trying to incorporate coping skills into my life that will help with my disabilities😪

I’ve not done any work for like a month and now I’m finally doing a lot of work and getting shit DONE and it feels really nice to finally be productive again. And I made two plant sales this week!

It’s 2am on the 10th but I’m calling it the 9th because I haven’t slept.

My heart hurts. Wedding planning is so hard and we already have so much else going on. Let alone the fact that we’re not paying for it so now we’re being held hostage by my wife’s parents’ demands. I broke down about it and then she had a panic attack and all I could do was just hold her and tell her that she didn’t do anything wrong :/

I’m stuck between wanting things to be perfect and not wanting to give my opinion at all for fear of rejection. I’m also in a flare right now so I am just not okay.

We did find our venue which is good. It’s really pretty and lovely and perfect.

I’m so tired and sad and empty. I haven’t had anything for months and it just keeps getting worse.

My mind is racing and it has been all night. I’ve been gone from work for basically two weeks and now it’s becoming impossible to go in. Which is horrible because I haven’t done any work in months even without being at home.

My top surgery is in like 75 days and I scheduled a nose surgery for December. I’m really hopeful that they’ll both really improve my quality of life. Even just not having tiddies anymore I think will help me a lot. But breathing will be really nice too.

There’s too much in my mind. I wish I’d taken a Xanax before bed but here I am. I don’t want to complain but I don’t know what else to do and I’m just so exhausted of being alive right now. It doesn’t help that I ran out of weed yesterday too and have approximately -$10 yeehaw. During a week when my back is murdering me👍 I don’t want to do this anymore but I don’t have a choice and I’m so tired of being here. I am not trying to be openly suicidal but jfc. I’m just tired. Everything takes too much energy and I don’t know how I will ever pull myself out of this burnout.