i am a problem

im thinking about the past and thats bad

please.dont leave me here in this life alone.

i feel so pitiful and pathetic. there is no comfort to be found

i thought about saying something and i figured id just embarrass myself so i didnt. important lesson about how things fall through your fingers if you dont close your fist around them

god fucking why did he do that

i say i knew but honestly i still cant tell if that even was him… maybe the patterns were fake and he just. got over it

im sorry. i should have. i dont know. made the ultimate fool of myself and accepted the patterns to be true even if i felt crazy. i knew didnt i. but it… last time he was so obvious. i knew and i ignored it because i was scared of being wrong and the scariest thing is getting my hopes up.

one whole fucking year of silence capped off with a death.

im sorry im sorry i didnt mean it i didnt mean it

why would he come back only to do that?????he must hate me What if hes dead What if that was burying the final remnants of the phase in his life that was All that scott bullshit

i feel so horrible

i didnt mean it i didnt mean it i promise i was just angry i didnt mean it

is this the end? what the fuck am i going to do