Wizarding Garms Emporium @wizard-garms - Tumblr Blog

Shadow Wizard Tailors Gang

we love making robes

I'm just a guy in a tailors shop really, I don't have an apprentice, yet (aspiring robemakers get in touch), I just get by with my shears, a wand and arnold, my enchanted sewing machine.

I've made all sorts of robes for all sorts of wizards in the past, if you need robes making or want to set up an order, shoot me an ask or a DM!

We also supply some wizarding accessories as is standard, a good robe needs a nice brooch to hold it together after all.

Important tags:

#garms inspo

- possible designs we can supply you with

#conjecture

- conversations with other wizards and such

#ramblings

- I'll probably post under this if me and Arnold have a fight, again

It happens a lot

My other blog is @gingertomcat

#wizardposting #garms inspo #conjecture #ramblings #wizard garms #wizard tailors #wizard fashion

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glitched00000

draconym

Bothers me when the distinction between Witch and Wizard is drawn according to gender. The Witch/Wizard distinction is one of class. Wizards live in towers and have cursed artifacts. Witches live in shacks and have crooked teeth.

draconym

Both witches and wizards can be evil, of course. But when a witch is evil they turn you into a frog. When a wizard is evil they try to tear a hole in reality or raise an undead army. You don't see witches doing that shit because they're working class.

ecoeschatologist

The witch is looked down upon because they are competition to the hierarchical work of wizardry; they present an alternative to state monopoly on magic.

draconym

Absolutely. Witches perform folk magic--you'd never catch a wizard getting overly preoccupied with practical magic like soothing ulcers or curing the flu, but witches are always brewing up stuff for those kinds of reasons.

Magic is like programming. When it's seen as practical and tedious, it's "women's work." When it's seen as academic and intellectual, you get a huge salary and an audience with the king.

draconym

"so why aren't there female wizards" because of sexism, duh. Women have been shut out of magical academia the same way they have been shut out of so many other kinds of academia.

Maleficent was absolutely an evil wizard. She has a castle. She has a staff. She shouts "FOOLS" in an especially wizardly way.

Mad Madam Mim was every bit as magical as Merlin, but she didn't have ambitions of--or access to--power. She's a witch.

dogpuppy

breadassassin0

the nine hells must pay for this

wizard-garms

Cmonnnn everyone knows the spires were an inside job

This is all done by the wizard council to justify a war, leave the nine hells alone

#wizardposting #conjecture

the-faultofdaedalus

magic system where “dark magic” and “light magic” are literal terms - dark magic consumes photons, making an area around the spell visibly darker, sometimes to an Extreme extent, and light magic releases photons.

because of this most dark mages tend to work in very brightly-lit areas (either artificial light or outside in the daytime) to fuel their spells and wear and use lightly coloured clothes and tools so that they’re easier to see in the dimness their spells create, whereas light mages wear heavy, sometimes leaden robes (depending on the work being done) and the magical equivalent of welding masks to protect themselves from what can be an extreme amount of light, and sometimes other kinds of electromagnet radiation!

needless to say this is incredibly confusing for anyone unfamiliar with the culture

the-faultofdaedalus

due to the fact that both magics react with basically all of the electromagnetic spectrum - not just the visible light part of it - dark magic is enormously useful for radiation protection (uv-eating spellwork as sunscreen, anyone?), but also has the slightly uncomfortable effect of eating infared as well - which does have the effect of making areas around powerful or prolonged dark magic uncomfortably chilly.

nothing that a nice fur coat or enchanted light-magic IR-emitting lamps can't fix!

evilwizard

okay this is some truly genius world-building

sighinastorm

post the light cone

wrought-tweaks

This light cone?

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dailybeef

7-28-25 Cool Wizard

mold-wizard

Yeah, okay, I was feeling kind of uninspired so my latest cursed amulet is just... it's kind of a choose-your-own-curse thing. Yeah, you just decide on the curse yourself. Make sure it's something suitably unpleasant, though. You're on the honor system here.

wizard-garms

Cursing myself with BPD

(big penis disorder)

😎😎😎

mold-wizard

Yeah, I... I really feel like you're not going with the intended spirit of the thing here...

wizard-garms

Yea no you're right,

Funnily enough as I was trying to set the curse someone shouted "BEES" and the amulet registered that instead so now my tower is full of bees and they follow me wherever I go. Idk what to do about it :/

#wizardposting #wizard posting #curse #cursed amulet

mold-wizard

Yeah, okay, I was feeling kind of uninspired so my latest cursed amulet is just... it's kind of a choose-your-own-curse thing. Yeah, you just decide on the curse yourself. Make sure it's something suitably unpleasant, though. You're on the honor system here.

wizard-garms

Cursing myself with BPD

(big penis disorder)

😎😎😎

#wizardposting #wizard posting #curse #cursed amulet

wyrmoftheweb

well yeah i have a pet hydra and it only has one head. i'm not going to cut its head off just to make it look cooler, you asshole. that's seriously unethical. and i'm not letting you cut its head off either. if you really want a hydra with multiple heads, you should go for a rescue- but if you want your pet to look cooler at the cost of its physical health, maybe you shouldn't get any kind of pet at all. no, the hydra's not for guarding my evil tower, it's my pet. have you ever heard of a pet? like a puppy or a kitty? you think i can't defend my evil tower by my self?

wizard-garms

Cutting a hydra's head makes them weaker anyway, it'll just split their capabilities!

Whereas a hydra with one head can do all the biting and flamethrowing and eating, a hydra with two heads will split those responsibilities, three heads and while they can attack from all sides they lose the ability to switch between.

Furthermore, I imagine a single headed hydra is harder to come by since they often get their heads cut at young ages for aesthetics. It's like not cutting a cat's polydactyl fingers.

#wizardposting #conjecture

teathattast

what's the verdict? 👀

free him 🚫🔗‼️

lock him up 🔒⬆️👮‍♀️

Voting ended onAug 1, 2025

wizard-garms

Free up my man he ain't do nothin wrong 😤😤🫡

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wizard-council-bureaucrat

“King” sized “Queen” sized, even sized for “Twins” but no “Wizard” sized? Discrimination. How will I dress my impossibly dimensioned bed now Bed, Bath, & “Beyond”?

wizard-garms

That's the beyond part

Extradimensional futon

#wizardposting #futon

apolladay

would you be okay with living next door to a cemetery or graveyard?

yes, i have no problem living right next to one

i wouldn’t live right next to it, but maybe like a street or two over

no, i would prefer not to live anywhere near one

Would you be okay with living next door to a cemetery or graveyard?

yes, I have no problem living right next to one

I wouldn’t live right next to it, but maybe like a street or two over

no, I would prefer not to live anywhere near one

Voting ended onMay 6, 2025

#i literally live up the road from the cemetery

wizardaweek

The Clover Wizard & The Dandelion Wizard

i know i’m terribly behind on wizard drawings, but i plan on trying to catch up with double the wizards for a bit! i hope you like this spring themed pair ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ

#we even sew plant matter!

gavamont

Drink my potion derived from vermouth

Sweet and dry and ever so smooth

Gives you the courage to climb your roof

Not really drunk, it’s rather low proof

But it’s complex and herbal for recreational use

My sweet potion derived from vermouth

ratazom

Drink my potion of foul angostura bitters

Turns alcohol snobs into alcohol spitters

The creature that stirs it makes harsh awful chitters

Among awful potions, it's the heav'yest of hitters

The vile greenish flavor will make you all quitters

When you taste the potion of angostura bitters

numamazza

drinky my potion

it is smol

jusț one cherry

that is all

no effects

just good juicy

goes with drinks

follows theme loosely

mundanemurphy

Drink my sweet potion of jungle juice

Smells like pure sugar, hits like a moose

Drink it at the party and tighten the noose

Think you'll stay sober, but there's really no use

I'm not really a wizard so "potion" is loose

But anyway try my sweet jungle juice

mundanewarren

Try my imported craft IPA

It’s magical how no one else likes it this way

I drink one at a party and give none away

It’s colored like a

ah fuck! It’s fucking biting me! Fuck! And I spilled my beer!

jimkinnz

drinking my potion of warren,s blood

better than alcohol' better than mud

he drops to the floor with a deafening thud

when i,m drinking my potion of warren,s blood

(⁠ ⁠◜෴◝⁠ ⁠)

gavamont

Hell, I’m not driving, pour me a glass

The cocktails have knocked me right on my ass

So I’ll sip some blood and have a blast

I’m not driving tonight, so pour me a glass

mundanemurphy

Dude. What the fuck.

gavamont

Hey. I technically don’t have a valid license to drive in this world. And last time I did, you complained because I wanted to try making a tunneling car because flying cars are too cliche.

So like, call a taxi or let me just summon a horse.

mythicgarden-deactivated2025030

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victusinveritas

poorly-drawn-mdzs

I love you Safety Wizard.

(Inspired by @keroascrazy)

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