thechubbychronicles

Let’s talk about this amazing thing that has saved my reputation. 

Now you may be thinking what in the world is this chubby girl talking about, but if you are a chubby girl like me, then you might relate. 

The extra 20-50 pounds that leaves me, or you, unconventionally overweight is the main and leading reason that I am not a total SLUT. And granted, being a slut is not a bad thing. Being a feminist myself I find no harm in the promiscuity of women because we are breathing humans with needs. If it’s social acceptable for men, then it should be for women. 

But I’m talking about the mere cock block that is my additional body poundage and the main reason my “barrel of scores” is empty. Not the kind of barrel where there’s a little water at the bottom half, I’m talking dry… the kind of old dusted barrel that you don’t even use to put old moldy towels in kind of dry. 

And the reason for my not so promiscuous behavior- I strictly relate to the numbers I see on the scale and my inability to charm a man with the curvature of my ass, or more so, that of my stomach. And let me tell you, if I was the sexiest thing to walk this earth I may or may not feel the urge to lunge after any dressed man with semi-impressive music taste and a beard. 

Many of you may be thinking you shouldn’t read this just based on the title alone. 

Having the cute boy that sits across from you in some lobby somewhere read the words “fat” or “chubby” will automatically make him look at your body and assess whether you’re reading about yourself. Heaven forbid you might actually be fat or chubby and if in fact you are, then this man sitting across from you is picturing you naked and we can’t have that. 

And hell if you have 10 extra pounds around your waist where your jeans button then you might as well have a BigMac in your lap and a garden of fries at your feet. So take caution and be prepared before reading. 

You might even want to invest in those nifty book covers that you used to buy at the book fair in the 5th grade, or in this case a really good secret spot because you’re probably reading this on your computer.

 And here’s another disclaimer, I’m not a writer. 

I like to think I am because I occasionally put words together that can sometimes be funny when in reality I just write down all the fucked up shit in my head. Turns out it’s pretty funny. 

Or people are just laughing at the pain they feel inside because they can relate. So don’t check my grammar or my run on sentences because you will be here all night. I’m going to talk about the chubbery that happens to me. Because I’m chubby. And shit happens.