Things Not to Do in a Tarot Reading
Most readings go over great! However, there is definitely some level of etiquette expected. Here’s a list of some things that can instantly turn a reading sour!
💎 Be Disrespectful. This should really go without saying. If you’re getting a reading, treat them with respect! They are providing a service just like anybody else you would give money to. Even if they’re doing it for free, they’re still taking time out of their day to help you out.
💎 Cram Questions. Typically, it goes one question, one card, with more cards providing more insight or addressing different facets of a single question. It makes a reader’s head ache when someone purchases a single card draw, but sends the reader a billion questions. They’re trying to get the insight of a ten-card spread for basically a dollar, and from the reader’s end it feels like they’re being slighted. It’s simple: if you want more insight and more detail, choose a reading that fits your needs.
💎 Fight the Reading. There are two ways people do this: fighting the message, and fighting the reader. In the first, if the cards say something the querent doesn’t like, and they get upset, trying to get the reader to “fix” their answer. This mostly comes from people who wanted a tarot reading for self-affirmation, rather than insight into a problem. If you want a feel-good tarot sesh that’s fine; be sure to either purchase a reading designed for that, or let your reader know you’re not up for bad news right then. The second comes from fellow readers! The reader will be going about their business and the querent will say, “I read tarot and that’s not what that card means.” It may seem like a kind gesture at first, but not all decks have the same meaning for every card and the reader’s intuition and unique interpretation are just as important as the card. If the meanings were set in stone for every card, we wouldn’t need to go to other readers!
💎 Treat the Reader Like a Hack. Skepticism is understandable. Skepticism is completely fine! A lot of skeptics end up getting tarot readings either for the novelty of it, or because their friend dragged them into it. It’s okay to approach a reading with a healthy amount of reservation, waiting to see what’s in store before totally investing in it. However, there’s a line between being skeptical, and being a jerk about it. Don’t spend the whole time trying to “expose” your reader as a fraud, constantly critique on how vague or not they’re being, and just steamrolling over the message they’re trying to give you so that you can feel superior somehow. It doesn’t make you look like a hero, it makes you look like someone I impersonate with an annoying voice to my friends over dinner.
💎 Ask Questions that are Clearly Out of Line. Tarot can get pretty heavy sometimes. A lot of experienced readers have at least one story of someone who really opened up to them about dark subjects, and they worked through it together. A lot of different subjects are acceptable, but some just… really aren’t. My friend had a querent approach him online, all but straight-up saying they were meant to be together and asking for a reading about their future. I’ve had people approach me asking for me to diagnose their illness. If you have a question about a potentially triggering subject, please please ask your reader if they are comfortable reading for that topic before just unloading a graphic description on them. Also, don’t hit on your reader. It’s the occult equivalent of hitting on your waitress.
💎 Minimize the Querent’s Concerns. This person came to you with a question in mind, and is putting their trust in you. What seems trivial to you may be a big deal to someone else! If someone approaches you asking what they can do to bond with their cat more, don’t make them feel silly for choosing that question; that’s their prerogative. If they’re concerned enough about it to get a tarot reading, maybe there’s more to it than meets the eye!
💎 Judge Their Question (to their face.) I won’t say “don’t judge them at all,” because often that’s impossible. We’re only human, after all. Let’s say your querent is considering leaving their long-term relationship for a sketchy but passionate fling. You might think this person has garbage priorities, but I promise any lecture you feel like giving them, they’ve already heard. They’re not paying you to nag or bestow your personal ethics onto them. They’ve already done whatever they’ve done, and now they would just like some insight before moving forward. It’s not a reader’s job or a reader’s place to place moral judgement on a reader. (It’s a lot like being a therapist… everything is neutral and confidential, unless there’s evidence of abuse or potential harm to the querent or someone else. If the querent did/is doing something illegal, that’s a different matter.)
💎 Be Disrespectful. Again, this should go without saying. Our querents deserve a little dignity! It’s okay to laugh with them, should the atmosphere allow for it, but never laugh at them. A querent’s feelings are perfectly valid and should be treated as such. They are not inherently foolish or less wise than you, so let’s all agree to not present ourselves as these sages of wisdom helping the poor little mortals.
💎 Half-Ass It. Someone is actually giving you literal money! We get that you’re tired. We get that you hate the question, but literal shapeshifting master of darkness Aku could kick down the door to your Tarot Shack, slap down a five dollar bill, and ask for a reading on his love life. You would still be ethically obligated to actually try and give a reading based on what the cards say, and in a reasonable amount of depth that someone who doesn’t read tarot would feel like they got a sufficient amount of insight. Basically, you’re offering a service. Give it your all!
