The Wistful Whisp

Darth Vader

A planted explosive on the shuttle.

How it was missed, he didn’t know.

All he knew was that you were caught in the blast as you exited the shuttle when it landed on Mustafar.

He had been on the Executor in the planet’s orbit wrapping up meetings before he would join you. Then he felt your force signature flicker and his world stopped.

Who? Who dared?

Who dared to try to take you from him?

No matter. He would not lose you. He could not lose you. Already making his way to his ship as an officer rushed to inform him of the incident.

As the TIE advanced made its descent to the palace hanger, Vader could see workers were still attempting to put out the flames from the charred remains of the shuttle. However that was of little concern to him, at the moment. Ships were replaceable. You were not.

Finally touching down, Vader disengaged the ship’s engine and exited the ship. He then briskly made his way to the palace’s med bay.

As the bay doors opened, he observed medical droids scurrying across the room tending to the victims of the explosion. And yet he could not see you.

Stepping forward, he approached the medical droid nearest to him.

“Where is Y/n?” He demanded.

“My Lord Vader, Y/n’s injuries were quite severe and extensive. We have placed them in a Bacta tank so that they may recuperate faster. They are currently residing in a private room we have created for them. This way, please.” The droid stated guiding the Sith Lord through the med bay and down a hallway filled with doors

Finally they stopped in front of one door. And the droid turned to face Vader. “Should you require anything, please let one of us know. I will take my leave.”

And so Vader was left standing in front of the door. He took one step forward and the door opened with a hiss. The room’s lights automatically turned on, revealing the bacta tank in the center of the room.

Vader took a moment to take in your form before he approached. Already, you had deep bruises all over your arms and torso. You had a deep cut on your right cheek. He couldn’t even imagine what you looked like internally.

Slowly, he walked forward until he was directly in front of the tank looking up at your unconscious face. Hesitantly, he reached his left hand out and placed it against the glass of the tank. He bowed his head after a moment, guilt making him feel unworthy to look at your slumbering face for very long.

“This should not have happened. It is because of me that you are in this condition. I am…sorry, bright one.” He apologized.

He was faced with a choice. Did he go after your attackers or stay by your side and ensure that he was present when you awoke?

The part of him calling for vengeance stated that this act could not go unpunished for any longer. They had tried to take what belonged to him. And they must pay the price for their insolence.

If he were still Anakin Skywalker, he may have been able to push those feelings of retribution aside, focusing on you.

But he was not Anakin Skywalker. And he would have his revenge.

You awoke several days later, resting in a bed instead of a bacta tank. The droids had determined that your serious injuries had healed and your more superficial injuries could heal with time. Though that did little to soothe the discomfort you were feeling.

You were informed that Vader had visited you once while you were in the bacta tank, but left the palace immediately after. He had not returned since. And so, you began your road to recovery alone, save for your droid companion.

Days passed and the soreness began to lose its edge, allowing you to begin leaving your bed for short bursts. Still requiring great amounts of rest in between each activity, you were often left alone in your thoughts.

You wondered if Vader blamed himself for this attack. Or if he was worried you would be upset with him and that’s why he left. Vader knew that you didn’t want to come with him when he offered you the choice all those years ago, and for a while after, you wondered if death would have been a better option. But then things changed, and love set in. And you came to know the man beneath the mask. You often tell yourself if given the same choice now, you wouldn’t hesitate in making the same decision you did all years before.

You lived your life with Vader with no regrets. Come what may.

The next day, you heard whispers from the servants as they delivered your meals.

A rebel base was attacked. Essentially razed to the ground. No survivors. And the bodies that were found had been massacred.

The Empire claimed responsibility for the attack, but you had the sinking suspicion that these were the actions of a certain Imperial.

That afternoon you were visited by your lover, having returned from his absence. He approached your bedside and gave you a once over.

“Your condition has improved.” He noted.

“Greatly. Though I still have a couple weeks before I’m fully recovered.” You smiled.

“Good. Those that were responsible for the attack have been dealt with. The Rebellion will think twice before making such a bold move again.” Vader promised.

You nodded your head.

A silence fell between you. Neither knowing how to begin the conversation that was looming over your heads waiting to be discussed.

“You were not responsible for what happened, Vader.” You finally said.

Vader was silent for a moment before speaking. “It would not have happened if you were not with me.”

“Did you plant the bomb? Were you in charge of doing the shuttle’s security check?” You asked already prepared for this argument.

You were met with silence.

“Then it wasn’t your fault. It was my choice to be with you and if this is a consequence of that choice, so be it. I love you and accept everything that comes with loving you.” You state with a look of determination in your eyes.

“Are you aware that your skills in debate rival that of some senators?” Vader asked.

A smile grew on your face. “I may have been told that before. Now, sit. I’d like to spend some time with you.”

“Yes, little one.” He agreed taking a seat next to you as you began to talk about your recovery.

Maul

You stupid little fool.

Why did you have to be so selfless?

Those were Maul’s thoughts as he carried your unconscious body over his shoulder. Running down alleyways through the cover of night.

Minutes earlier you were taking a moonlit stroll as you had done many nights before without incident. Until tonight, when you were ambushed by an inquisitor. Maul didn’t know what dulled his senses, but all he remembered seeing was you shoving him out of the way as the swing of the inquisitor’s lightsaber struck across your back. You let out a scream of pain as you collapsed to the ground.

In that moment, Maul felt one of the strongest bouts of rage he had ever felt in his life. Letting out a roar, he ignited his lightsaber and fought the inquisitor, nearly overpowering them in just a handful of moves. The inquisitor, knowing that this was not a fight that they would win chose to flee, leaving Maul to deal with the aftermath of the attack.

When Maul approached you, he noted the all too familiar smell of burnt flesh that often came from lightsaber wounds. You were lying face down which allowed Maul to see the extent of your injury. A deep lateral gash which began at your left side and ended at your right. And what concerned Maul most was that the gash went across the middle of your back, and was deep enough that he could see the charred, exposed bones and tissue of your spine. Maul was no doctor, but he knew the more time he wasted standing there, the more your chances of survival diminished.

Carefully, he lifted you over his shoulder, ensuring he did not jostle you too much as to aggravate your wound. Once you were secure in his arms, Maul began sprinting away from the scene of the attack. A destination already in mind.

Maul knew this wound was beyond what the Mandalorians in his collective could treat. You needed a doctor. Having lived on Janix for quite some time, he became very familiar with aspects of its criminal underworld. Including physicians and medics who offered care to less than savory types, perfect for those who needed medical treatment with no questions asked. Though it often came at a steep price.

That didn’t matter to him though. He would pay any price if it bought you more time by his side.

As he made one final turn down an alleyway he came to a street lined with garages. The repair district. All the doors were shuttered for the night and the street deserted, save for a large Duros sitting in a comically small chair in front of one garage, appearing to be asleep. Maul approached until he was standing in front of the sleeping giant. Seeing as the Duros was still sleeping, Maul gave him a firm kick in the shin to wake him up. The Duros awoke visibly agitated at having his sleep so painfully disturbed and glared at Maul silently.

“I am in need of services from the owner of this shop. You can either let me pass or I will force my way through.” Maul said coolly.

The Duros continued to glare at Maul as he leaned back in his chair and knocked on the shuttered door behind him. The door began to ascend upwards revealing a speeder repair shop. Maul stepped forward into the shop and was met by an older human man.

“What can I do for you, sir? Need something repaired?” The man asked politely. “I can fix anything, so long as you meet my price.”

“My friend is wounded and they require medical care that is off-the-record, so to speak.” Maul explained.

“Patient privacy is one of our specialties. This way, please.” The man gestured with his hand.

Maul he entered a side room that was filled with medical equipment. A metal table was at the center of the room with surgical supplies on a tray next to it. The room wreaked of disinfectant.

“Please place your friend on the table so I may examine them.” The human asked, placing surgical gloves on his hands.

Maul walked over to the table and gently placed you faced down on the metal surface, with your head resting on one side.

The man made his way until he was standing across from Maul and began inspecting your wound.

The man took a step back and a look of horror fell on his face. “I’m sorry, but you need to go. I can’t treat your friend.”

Maul felt his jaw begin to clench, but tried to remain civil for your sake. “Why?”

“I’ve been in this game a long time. Long enough to recognize a lightsaber wound when I see one. I don’t know what kind of trouble your friend got into and I don’t want to know. So take your friend and leave, before you get me involved in this mess.” He said obviously frightened since he was doing anything but meet Maul’s developing glare.

“”Involved”? Why doctor, you are already involved. You are involved in the dilemma of whether or not that person lying there lives. And I promise you, the consequences of refusing to treat them will be far worse than the consequences of not. So what will you do?” Maul asked walking over to the doctor until he was towering over him.

The doctor wordlessly turned to face your body again and began to reexamine your wound. “It’s not gonna be cheap. And I’m adding a hazard fee.”

“Do what you must, but I want them healed.” Maul responded stepping back from the bed to quietly observe the doctor at work.

Whatever the cost to save you.

You awoke to cheek lying on top of a pillow on a cool metal table. You could feel something was wrapped around your torso. You reached a hand down and found your shirt had been removed and bandages had taken its place. You furrowed your brow confused as to how you got here until your memories came flooding back to you. You attempted to push yourself up and called for your lover only to collapse back onto the metal surface in stinging pain.

Almost immediately you felt a gloved hand on your shoulder. “Careful, my love. You’ll tear your stitches if you move recklessly like that.”

You looked up and saw Maul with a look of relief on his face that you were awake.

“Where am I?” You asked trying to look around the room seeing if you recognized anything that could clue you in to your surroundings.

“A private medical office. They specialize in these types of injuries.” Maul explained, knowing you could put the pieces together of what he was implying.

You nodded your head in understanding.

“The doctor determined that a portion of your spine and nerves in the area of the wound were damaged beyond what he could repair. He made the decision to implant an augmentation to replace it. And the surgery was a success.” Maul explained.

Once again, you tried to sit up, this time, with the assistance of Maul. You found that with slow and careful movement, it hurt less when you transitioned into a sitting position. You still felt incredibly sore though.

Maul was now standing in front of you with a sad look on his face and what you could’ve sworn were tears in his eyes. “I had no idea the inquisitor was there. And I almost lost you because I failed to protect you.”

You smiled softly and lifted one hand to wipe the tears from your beloved’s eyes. “But you did. You protected me from death itself by bringing me here. You didn’t fail me. You saved me. Just as I saved you. I have no regrets about any of it and would do it all over again.”

Maul couldn’t help but chuckle. “You stupid little fool.”

“Yes, but I’m your stupid little fool.” You responded leaning forward to place a soft kiss on his lips which he reciprocated almost instantly.

Often times, you begin your day alone. Your lover already out of bed and going about their business, having started the day hours ago.

However, there are some days. On very rare occasions, you would share a morning with them.

And this is what it would look like.

Maul

Slowly, and with great effort, you tried to open your still drowsy eyes. Your senses just beginning to stir as you did. And then you felt it. Warmth. Not from the blankets, but the broad chest your head was currently resting on. The strong arms wrapped around your torso, as if they were sheltering you from the world.

You smiled. Knowing who was beside you and still asleep based on their steady breathing.

He had stayed.

Not wanting to disturb your lover, you laid your head back down on his chest and closed your eyes. Letting the symphony of two beating hearts lull you back to sleep.

~~~~

An hour or so passed, and the Zabrak found himself awakening from the world of sleep. Blinking his eyes, he looked down to see you fast asleep. A soft smile spread on his face as he lifted his hand to gently brush hair from your slumbering face.

He lived for these moments. Moments where his mind wasn’t focused on the criminal underworld or his grand plans for vengeance, but could just focus on enjoying your presence. Committing your beautiful and peaceful face to memory as he had done hundreds of times before.

The face of the person who made him believe that a future could exist after his goals were achieved. A future of peace and love. Concepts that his younger self would have scoffed at, but now were treasures beyond anything the galaxy could ever offer him.

He felt you begin to stir in his arms, and so he brought your body closer to his, placing a chaste kiss on the top of your forehead. “Rest, my love. Just a little longer.”

For just a little longer, let him cherish this moment.

Vader

He had been awake for several hours. Many things may have changed, but he was still a creature of habit. Deciding to remain in the Bacta tank instead of that accursed suit. Calling it life support felt like irony considering the pain it caused him when he wore it.

Then again, he considered, the constant pain may have been penance for his failures in his past life. A life that had been destroyed by his hand.

And yet he had somehow found relief for that pain. In the form of you.

His gaze fell upon you. Sleeping soundly in the bed close to his tank. A look of serene peace on your face.

A wistful smile grew on his pale, scarred face.

He had known the joy of being entangled in the legs of the one he loved most. There was truly no better feeling than embracing your lover so closely that it felt as if your very beings would intertwine.

But he could never give you that joy.

You always had issues with your appearance. Never quite meeting society’s beauty standards or expectations. No matter what you changed, you always looked out of place.

And just when you start to feel comfortable with yourself, something reminds you of your differences and you start all over again.

Today you were back to square one. Poking and prodding yourself in the mirror. Smushing this and stretching that. Completely unaware that you had a silent observer…

Maul

“While I agree you should admire yourself in the mirror more. I do believe you’re going about it the wrong way, my dear.” Maul said announcing his presence.

You nearly burst out of your skin from fright, so preoccupied with your internal criticisms. You whip your head around to find your lover casually leaning against the doorway watching your reaction.

“How long have you been standing there?” You ask turning to face him.

“Long enough to recognize that look on your face. You think you hide it better than you do.” He says stepping forward to hold you by your waist. “Why do you do this to yourself, my love?”

You don’t look him in the eye as you give your answer, too afraid of how he would look at you. “I wish I could change myself so I could be beautiful.”

You hear a chuckle stir from Maul as you look to see that a soft smile has spread on his face. “Oh my silly love. You already are. You are a work of art that I would rather hide from the galaxy than have undeserving eyes gaze upon. For the galaxy does not know how to admire you as I do, if this is how you view yourself. The expectations society has will come and go with time, but you. Your beauty is timeless, eternal even.”

“You really mean that?” You ask softly almost overwhelmed by his sweet words and loving gaze.

“With all my being. Now shall we take this matter to our bed where I may worship every inch of your body until you begin seeing yourself the way I see you?” He asks, his gaze now becoming a mix of adoration and desire.

You feel warmth spread across your face as you burrow your face into your lover’s chest, flustered by his words, as you squeak out at a “Yes, please.”

And oh, did he make you feel beautiful.

Vader

“For what purpose do you do that to yourself?” Vader asks, making his presence known to you.

You yelp in surprise as you turn to see Vader standing about ten feet away from you, waiting patiently for your answer.

This was not the first time the Sith Lord had snuck up on you. You had been with Vader for so long that the breathing from his respirator had actually become a sort of white noise to you. Something that you could tune out. Sometimes, you think he actually enjoys the fact that he can creep up on you.

“I..I just wish I could remove the parts of myself that shouldn’t be there.” You say as you look away from him, too ashamed of your insecurities.

You hear footsteps slowly approach you, and then feel a gloved hand take hold of your chin and gently turn your head so you were looking up at him.

“If you removed every part of yourself that you thought imperfect, you would not be the beautiful person I adore.” He remarks.

“I just don’t see what you see, I suppose.” You say shaking your head, still unconvinced.

“Then I will change that.” He said, releasing his grasp on your chin and turning to leave the room.

You were left there confused but had a sinking suspicion that this was not the end of the conversation.

And in the coming days, you were proven right.

You found yourself surrounded by tailors. Taking body measurements, comparing swatches of fabric to your skin tone, note taking what complimented you and what did not. Until finally, the swarm of couturiers dispersed, leaving you alone again.

The next morning, you opened your wardrobe to find all of your clothing replaced with what you could only describe as couture. Each new addition complimented and highlighted every feature of your body.

Oh, little one.

You truly know how to twist the knife, don’t you?

You had travelled with Vader to an Imperial colony for inspection. As you both exited the ship, the governor and his family stood to greet you. All stoic and serious, save for the toddler standing by the governor’s wife. She took one look at you and toddled over, making grabby hands as she went. When she stopped at your feet, she looked up at you with a toothy grin and made the gesture again, asking to be held.

“May I hold her?” You ask the governor’s wife.

“O-of course!” She stuttered out, flustered that of all times, now her daughter chooses to be friendly.

You reached down and lifted the toddler into your arms, bringing her so she was resting on your hip, instinctively sway back and forth as you held her. “Aren’t you a friendly little cutie?”

The governor after pausing his introduction for a moment to marvel at the fact that the paramour of Darth Vader was currently rocking his child, he continued.

Vader tried his best to pay attention to what the governor was saying, but found himself distracted as he watched you out of the corner of his eye. You were busy entertaining the child, whispering to her and smiling.

You looked happy. Beaming even. Like holding a child was second nature to you.

And that made Vader think thoughts. Thoughts he shouldn’t have because they would only cause pain.

Of a child that had a combination of both your features running around the palace, squealing with laughter as you chased after them. A little girl of your own.

A second chance at fatherhood.

Vader stopped himself before he fantasized further. That was a different man. A different life.

He brought his focus back to the present, just in time for the governor to announce that he would begin a tour of the imperial headquarters.

As the group made their way through the building, you stayed close the governor’s wife talking about her daughter’s development and what it was like raising a child on an imperial colony. All while still holding the little girl, who at this point was fast asleep in your arms.

“Do you have any children? You seem to be a natural with them.” She asked you.

“No. No children. Just us.” You politely smiled.

“Well I think you’d be a wonderful mother.” She smiled back.

You nodded your head and turned to look at Vader’s broad back in front of you.

What would raising a child even look like with Vader? Would he want a child? His life was so busy already. Adding a child to the mix seemed…unfair.

And then your thoughts wandered to a little toddler similar to the one sleeping in your arms, in the palace hanger running to greet Vader as he returned home. How he would kneel to the ground and present them with a little trinket from a planet he visited. You would smile a few feet away, watching as the child would embrace their father. And he in turn, would embrace them.

You were disturbed from your thoughts when the group came to a stop at what you realized was the shuttle that you and Vader arrived in. The tour had finished while you were busy daydreaming.

The governor and Vader exchanged farewells with Vader stating he would send a report to the Emperor regarding the progress of the colony. Meanwhile, you carefully handed the sleeping child back to her mother, attempting not to wake her. After that, you both made your way up the shuttle ramp and into the cockpit.

Vader took a seat in the pilots’s chair and you sat in the seat beside him. As he began piloting the ship from the dock, he broke the silence that fell between you.

“Your thoughts are quite loud.” He stated.

“Are they?” You asked feeling warmth spread to your cheeks in embarrassment.

“Indeed.” He replied.

“I’m sorry, I hope I didn’t distract you from your inspection.” You apologized, now worried about what thoughts he had heard.

“It did not interfere with my duties. There is no need to apologize. It was merely an observation.” He responded.

“I see.” You stated as you nodded your head in understanding.

As Vader steered the shuttle so it began its ascension into the atmosphere, another silence fell between you. A subject hanging overheard waiting to be addressed.

“I…was not aware you were so skilled with children.” Vader commented with what you assume was hesitancy in his monotone voice.

“It’s not so much skill, rather children are just easy to understand for me. And they seem to sense that.” You explained.

“You should be aware that it is probable that we cannot conceive a child.” Vader warned.

“I know.” You say softly.

“But if you wished it. I would do everything in my power to make it so.” Vader promised.

You felt a lump grow in your throat as tears grew in your eyes. You reached forward to hold Vader’s hand that was closest to you. Giving it a squeeze.

“Thank you.”

“Of course, little one.”

You have good days and you have bad days just like anyone else. Just your bad days can last for weeks or even months. But today’s pain was the worst you had felt in a very long time which caught you off guard. And in that moment, you forgot all of your coping strategies. The only strength you had was to curl up in the fetal position on your bed and cry. Silently pleading to whoever was listening for the wave of pain to pass.

And that is where your lover found you…

Darth Vader

He had been in the palace hanger doing personal inspections on his ships, when he sensed your pleas for the pain to end. He immediately stopped what he was doing and made a beeline for your quarters. He found you still lying in the fetal position on the bed.

He walked closer to you until he was at the foot of your bed. You only then noticed him and tried and failed to focus your eyes so you could see him.

“You are in pain.” He stated. “I will fetch a medical droid.” And began walking towards the door until you held up your hand.

“Wait!” You gasped. “Stay. Please? I don’t want to be alone.”

And in that moment, Vader felt his charred heart skip a beat. Your relationship with Vader had greatly improved in the last year you had been with him, but this was the first time you had asked him to stay with you. He knew his next actions would either improve or hinder your relationship.

Cautiously, he walked to the side of your bed. Now facing you. “What do you require?”

“Can I hold your hand, please?” You asked between labored breaths.

Wordlessly, he outstretched his gloved right hand for you to take.

You held his hand and squeezed it as you faced another wave of pain. You groaned and gritted your teeth trying your best to breathe through the pain.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the pain lessened. You felt your brain was able to focus on its surroundings, now that it was not overwhelmed with pain. And the first thing you noticed was you were still holding a certain Sith lord’s hand.

Immediately, you attempted to let go of his hand, but found that he was still holding it. A gloved thumb gently brushing over your knuckles.

Vader’s reaction to your chronic pain has two sides. The first being out of everyone in the galaxy, this man could empathize with you the most about it. He will make sure that you get the best medical care possible. That you take your medicines and that you take care of your health. And he will do his best to comfort you, however you may need or ask.

On the other hand, your chronic pain can be so debilitating that you sometimes rely on him. And that makes him feel a certain way, because since he donned his suit no one has relied on him. Sure he was the Emperor’s right hand, but that didn’t mean he thought he was irreplaceable. The Emperor’s will could be carried out without him. Yet here you were, looking up at him with those pleading eyes asking, no, begging him not to leave.

Don’t worry, little one. He’s not going anywhere.

Maul

He had just returned to his base when he sensed your distress. He immediately made his way to your shared quarters. Once he was inside, he searched each room until he found you.

Instantly, he was kneeling at your side cupping your cheek. “It’s alright, my love. I’m here.”

“It hurts.” You groaned looking at him.

“Have you taken any medicine?” He asked softly as he stroked your cheek with his thumb.

You shook your head. “It came on so suddenly. I didn’t have time.”

He nodded his head and removed his hand from your cheek. He turned so that he was facing the nightstand by your side of the bed and opened the drawer. Inside, he found your medication.

He stood up and promised he would be right back. He made his way to the kitchen opening a cabinet to collect a drinking glass and then filled it with water. He quickly returned and handed you your medication and the glass of water. After you took the medicine and had a sip of water you handed the glass back to Maul who put it on your nightstand.

He turned so he was facing you again. “What can I do, dearest one?”

“Hold me. ‘Til it passes.” You replied.

Maul nodded his head and walked to his side of the bed and laid down. He then gently brought you into his arms so your back was flush against his chest and his head rested on your shoulder.

And whenever a wave of pain overwhelmed you he would whisper soothing words of comfort in your ear, placed soft featherlight kisses on your cheek or neck, and rub circles into your arms. All in an attempt to distract you from the pain.

And when you fell asleep in his arms, free from the pain but utterly exhausted, he knew he had done his job.

I’m going to start by saying if we are going with canon, this is going to be a possessive relationship. And by that I mean, you are a glimmer of light in his life he refuses to be extinguished by darkness. So you’re staying in his quarters. End of discussion. The only time that you leave is if you travel with him and even then that’s going to be very rare. Being with him means a target is on your back and he takes that very seriously. He’s already lost one love, he’s not losing another.

And that’s what I think would spark his interest in you. You reminded him of Padmé in some way. Maybe the Empire was interested in your home for its tactical position or resources and you openly opposed that. Telling anyone who would listen how wrong it was. Which caused you to gain overwhelming support from the people of your planet and neighboring planets in the system. And that got the Empire’s attention, which meant you’ve gained his attention.

When he’s sent to deal with you, he’s stunned to think a pretty little thing like you could cause so much trouble. You look at him with a brave and defiant face, knowing you’re about to die but refuse to be afraid, for you’re dying for what you believed in. And that thought is what saved your life. That bravery in spite of impossible odds caused a stir in his human heart. And he needed to investigate that sensation further. So he offers you a deal: come with him and the Empire will withdraw their interest in your planet or refuse and die. You choose the former.

In the beginning, Vader brings you to his palace on Mustafar and places you in a room next to his. Guards are posted at your door, for your protection(and to make sure you don’t leave). If he’s in the palace, he tries to visit you once a day. For an hour or two. Not wanting to overwhelm you with his presence as he understands that can be done very easily. When he visits, he asks if the quarters are suitable, if the food is adequate, and if you require anything that would make your life more enjoyable. At first, you say everything is fine, which is true. Then you think about a hobby you’ve missed doing and you offhandedly mention it to him. The next day a servant delivers to you the finest materials needed for your hobby.

When he leaves Mustafar for the first time, he builds a droid to keep you company. It soon becomes your best friend while he’s away. You find yourself as the days go by missing his visits and awkward small talk. When he returns, the armor on his right shoulder is scorched from the blaster bolt of a lucky rebel. Usually he would immediately head to his chambers to repair it, but he had to see you first.

When he enters your room, you feel your heart beat faster for a moment, excited to see him again. Then you notice the scorch mark on his armor. You ask what happened and if he was hurt. He explains what happened and states that he’s unharmed. And that’s what starts your mutual fondness, that genuine concern for him. That and he’s really the only person aside from your droid that you talk to nowadays.

With time, he would have you moved to his personal quarters. That was the eventual goal, in his mind. He would have your bed next to his bacta tank that way you could be close to him.

The first time you saw him without the suit was a test of trust. Would you run away in disgust and horror? Or would you stay? He would’ve brought you back if you did run, but that would probably have ruined the relationship. From then on it would only be one-sided, and Vader would make his peace with that. Having you in his heart is better than nothing.

Let’s say though that when you see him without the suit, you do stay. Trust would slowly grow between the two of you. Your conversations would go beyond mere small talk. He would actually discuss his frustrations with you and seek your opinion on them. Though he can’t discuss everything with you since some may be top secret, but I could absolutely see him vent about the incompetency of officers or Moffs to you.

And don’t get him started on Krennic, you’ll be there for a while if you do.

Vader’s affection for you is shown through his protectiveness and gifts/acts of service. Making improvements to your quality of life while living with him would be an example of this.

Physical touch would be something that I believe Vader would want to do early on, but he would wait until you were comfortable with it. Sometimes he just wants to touch you to make sure you’re real. And if you seek out this man for physical touch, he will oblige in an instant. His hugs are surprisingly comforting, just be mindful of the suit’s control panel on his chest. If you place kisses on his hands, this man thinks he’s died and gone to paradise. He lives for these soft moments.

For much of Maul’s life he’s been surrounded by men. This left little to no opportunity to learn about your monthly ordeal.

The first time it happens when he’s present, it’s the week before your period begins. He knows something is amiss by how you seem to show more frustration or sadness than you usually do. And you seem to just look miserable.

He asks if you’re coming down with something. Thinking that you’re ill and you’ll just say your period’s coming.

He blinks and then asks what a period is.

He nods his head as you explain the process, why it happens, and for how long.

He’ll ask questions such as what helps, what makes it worse, and most importantly, how can he help.

Will research in his free time about remedies for cramps, nausea, and general pain.

Come the following week when your period actually arrives, Maul hands you your heating pad, a cup of tea, and any painkillers you take for cramps. Will offer to massage your abdomen and back if it helps.

Will lay in bed with you, letting you try to sleep off the pain snuggled up to him. Will binge any holovid series you want with you. Though he makes no promises he’ll follow along with the story(secretly becomes invested).

Has casually mentioned to you that he’s read sex helps with period cramps since it helps improve blood flow and endorphins production. You nearly choked on the drink you were sipping when he said that.

Never judges you for the pain you feel, the mess you make, or the emotions you’re trying to manage. Your body is literally tearing a piece of itself out every month. He thinks you’re incredibly strong for trying to continue with your life as that happens.

You stood in a maze of caverns, red fog sweeping across all you could see. The air hung heavy with a sense of eeriness. As if warning you that you were somewhere forbidden. You continued pressing forward feeling as if there would be consequences if you stopped.

And then you heard it. Roars. Roars of anger and unbridled rage. A flash of red came from the cavern to the left of you along with the unmistakable sound of the swing of a lightsaber. You felt yourself being drawn to the tunnel, a need to investigate the source.

As you made your way slowly down the tunnel, whispers began to surround you. Some in a language you could not understand. Some that you could.

“We have watched you for a long time. The outworlder who captured the heart of the son of Dathomir.”

You progressed further down the tunnel as the voice continued.

“You think you bring him peace, but you only delay the inevitable. He is a tool of vengeance. And he will die by its hand.”

You tried shaking your head, denying the voice’s foretelling and attempting to remove the voice from your mind.

Finally, you came to the mouth of the cave, thinking you were free from the voices, only for them to intrude your mind again.

“You think me to be a liar, outworlder? Observe the fate of your beloved.” The voice stated.

As you exited the caverns came into a clearing free of the red fog, and found yourself in front of a seemingly ancient structure. The structure was a circle, made of stone bricks surrounded by torches that were ablaze with green flame. It seemed almost ceremonial in nature.

And at the center of the circle were two dueling beings. One was a white haired and bearded man, dressed in a brown robe and white tunic who wielded a blue lightsaber. The other you identified immediately as Maul. Though the Maul you saw before you appeared older than the one you know now. His ferocity in his fighting style though had not seemed to change with age.

Their fighting crescendoed until the blue lightsaber wielder stabbed Maul in the chest. You screamed and ran toward the two but you felt your arms being held back. You looked down and saw that the green flames from the two of the torches on either side of you were holding you in place. The flames did not burn you, merely restrained you.

You were helpless to watch as the blue lightsaber wielder now held Maul in his arms. They whispered to one another, but you could not make out what was said. Finally, you saw the light leave Maul’s eyes as the two figures faded into red mist.

You sobbed as you now knew the fate of your love. You did not know where it would happen or when. Only that you would not be there to hold and comfort him in his final moments.

“Do not weep. For it does not have to be this way, outworlder. There are ways for your lover to live once more. Through the old ways of Dathomir.” The voice soothed.

“How?” You asked as you blink away tears.

“A daughter.” One voice whispered.

“A daughter.” Another repeated.

“A daughter of Dathomir. A new generation of Nightsisters. Give us your daughter.” The main voice commanded.

You furrow your brows in confusion and horror. “But I have no daughter.”

You were surrounded by a cacophony of mocking laughter.

“You will. And when you do. We will be waiting.” The main voice promised.

“….waiting.” The voices echoed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Y/n, my love, wake up.” A voice called.

You opened your eyes with a gasp. No longer in the clearing, but lying in your bed with a concerned Maul beside you.

“Are you alright, dearest? You seemed to be having a nightmare.” Maul asked reaching forward to hold your hand. “Would you like to talk about it?”

You looked into his eyes and for a moment thought back to how lifeless they looked in your dream. You shuddered and shook your head. “No, it was a just a dream. I think I’m going to go splash some water on my face.”

You let go of Maul’s hand and climb out bed to make your way to the bathroom. Turning on the room’s overhead light, you made your way to the sink and turned on the faucet. Lowering your head and cup your hands underneath the running water, you splash cold water on your face. Feeling the sleepiness fade at the sensation, you lift your head to look into the mirror to look at your reflection.

“Y/n, where are you? Please tell me, my love.” You heard Anakin’s voice echo in your mind.

Your eyes widened for a moment in fear, thinking he'd found you. Then you calmed yourself when you realized you couldn’t sense the connection you had when you communicated with him before. He was calling out into the darkness with no idea you were there.

“Y/n, wherever you are, know that I love you. And I will find you.”

"Oh Anakin." You said aloud. "I'm so sorry."

If you listened closely you could hear your own heart breaking all over again.

~~~

'She's alive.' Anakin thought to himself as a tear rolled down his cheek. A feeling of joy warmed his chest and being.

'Fool!' Another part of him says. 'Calm your feelings. The Emperor will sense this shift in your emotions, and know something has changed.'

Quickly he wiped away the tear and took a deep breath to calm himself.

He still had duties to perform, and so he quickly made his way to the bridge of the ship.

After he completed his duties, he retired to his quarters, he then began searching for answers as to what happened to his beloved.

Much to his personal reservations, he recollected what he believed to be the worst day of his life.

He had just killed the last of the Separatists, when a planetary sensor detected a ship entering Mustafar's orbit, which he immediately recognized to be your ship.

He quickly walked out to greet you as you descended down the ramp of your now landed vessel.

"I saw your ship. What's wrong? Are you both alright?" He asked embracing you and then gently placing a hand on your swollen belly.

"We’re both alright, Ani. I had to see you. I'd heard such horrible things. Terrible things...about you." You uttered your breath hitching as tears began to overflow your eyes.

"What things, my love?" He questioned his brows furrowing.

"That you'd turned to the Dark Side and that you betrayed the Jedi." You whispered as if you were unable to believe what you were saying.

"That's not true. The Jedi betrayed me. They never understood my potential, or my power. They were going to let you die because they believed I wasn't worthy to wield the power to save you. I couldn't let that happen." He explained.

"Power? Potential? Do you not hear yourself, Ani? You sound like a Sith! The very thing we laid down our lives for so many times to fight. Obi-wan was right. You have changed." You stated, a sob slipping your trembling lips.

Anakin moved his hand from your abdomen so that his arms were both now by his sides. His eyebrows no longer furrowing with confusion, but with anger at the mention of his former master's name. "Why were you talking with Obi-wan?"

"He came by the apartment asking about you. He was concerned because he believed you turned to the Dark Side. He asked where you were. Please just come with me, Ani. We can start over away from all of this pain and suffering, and just be a family. Please Ani, I love you.” You pleaded now no longer able to hold back the sobs that escaped from your mouth.

Anakin's face contorted into one of further anger as he looked behind you to see his old master standing at the end of the ramp to your ship. He then returned his gaze, which was now a furious glare to you. "You brought him here to kill me, didn't you?!"

Horrified to see that Obi-wan had stowed away, immediately you began to deny his accusation. "No! No, I had no idea! I swear to you Ani, I didn't know."

Reaching for his lightsaber, Anakin looked at his frightened wife. "I trusted you! Go. Now. Before I do something I'll regret."

"Ani, please." You uttered softly, as you took a step forward.

Anakin lifted his dominant hand and used the Force to freeze your movements. Invisible hands wrapping around and squeezing your neck. "Liar!" He shouted.

"Let her go, Anakin!" Obi-wan shouted, horrified that his former apprentice would turn against his own wife. "Let. Her. Go."

After a tense minute, Anakin spread the fingers of his raised hand out, commanding a wave of exhaustion to fall over his wife and releasing her from his invisible grasp. Which caused Y/n to collapse to the ground unconscious.

"You made her betray me!" Anakin yelled accusingly.

"Anakin, she came to this planet with the sole intention of trying to reason with you. She only wanted to save the man she loved from himself. But your anger and hatred has clouded your judgement to the point that you cannot recognize her actions as well-intentioned. You've changed Anakin, and not for the better." Obi-wan stated.

"She doesn't understand, neither of you do! How everything I've done, I've done for her! For the galaxy! The Jedi were becoming too powerful!" He countered, his voice raising in anger.

"I'm sure that is what Sidious poisoned your mind to believe. Jedi are not concerned with power, unless you have already forgotten my teachings." Obi-wan remarked.

After an intense five minutes of arguing that grew in volume, both men came to the same conclusion: the other was too far gone, and needed to be stopped, permanently.

A lightsaber duel ensued. Apprentice versus Master. Dark versus Light. Both believed themselves to be in the right of their actions. The fight crescendoed when Obi-wan leapt from the floating platform over the river of lava, to the black gravel shore.

"It's over Anakin!" He shouted. "I have the high ground!"

Anakin knew that if he attempted to leap to the shore, there was great risk of Obi-wan striking him down before he landed.

"This is far from over, Obi-wan! I will see every surviving Jedi hunted down! I will make the galaxy safe for my family!" Anakin pledged, leaping onto the head of a nearby droid hovering over the river of lava as it collected it for mining processing. The droid returned to its mining facility, placing him away from the control center and out of harm.

~~~~~~~~

Unbeknownst to Anakin, Obi-wan returned to the control center to find you still unconscious. Placing his right arm under your knees, and his left arm under your shoulders, he carried you back to your ship and placed you in the ship's small med bay.

Slowly coming to consciousness, you briefly opened your eyes to see the Jedi Master look down at you with a look of pain and guilt. "Obi-wan, is Anakin alright?"

Unable to find the strength to answer your question, he left to enter the ship's cockpit, piloting the vessel to the nearest medical facility. This way, he could be sure Anakin's use of the Force didn't harm you or your unborn child. He had failed Anakin, but he wasn't going to fail either of you.

Meanwhile, by the time Anakin returned to the control center, You and Obi-wan were gone. Unable to sense where you were through the Force, confused by this, Anakin left the planet to travel to Coruscant to report to Lord Sidious of what had transpired. He hoped the Sith Lord would allow him to search for you once he reported back to him. As he made his way to what was once the Chancellor's office, he found his new master seated in his chair observing the skyscrapers as the evening sun set. Without turning in his chair, the Emperor seemed to sense Anakin's troubled presence.

"Ah, Lord Vader. I take it your task of dealing with the Viceroy and his compatriots was a success? And yet I sense turmoil within you. What is it, my young apprentice?" He asked.

"Y/n came to me. She knew everything. Obi-wan was there, I thought she brought him there to kill me. And.." He couldn't find the strength to say it.

"And you lashed out at her." The Emperor finished his sentence with. "You restrained her using the Force."

"Yes." Anakin quietly admitted only able to look at the ground in shame.

"I'm afraid there was an unforeseen consequence to your actions." The Emperor said with what sounded like sympathy.

Anakin immediately lifted his head his face becoming pale at the thought of himself hurting the woman he loved. "Is she alright? What happened?"

"It seems when you immobilized and choked her, for those moments she was frozen, she also could not breathe, the unborn child was frozen as well, and therefore was without oxygen for those precious moments. It seems your actions led to such irreparable damage that caused the death of them both." He explained.

Anakin felt as if he could no longer bear to stand and fell to his knees. His fists clenching in growing rage at such an accusation. "That's not true! She was alive! I felt it!"

“And can you feel her in the Force now, Lord Vader?" He asked now turning in his chair to face his apprentice.

Anakin tried to reach out in the Force to sense you, but felt nothing but emptiness. It was almost as if your force signature had vanished, almost as if- as if you were dead.

Anakin felt sick at the thought that not only had he killed the love of his life, but his child as well. His overwhelming guilt turned into horrifying rage. At the Jedi for not giving him the power to save you. At Obi-wan, for making him believe you who had always been faithful to him, was capable of betraying him. And most of all, rage at himself for extinguishing the one joy he had in his life.

The already battered room began to tremble at the exertion of force Anakin released through his grief and anger. The desk the emperor was sitting behind, bent and tore as if it was paper, the lights that brightened the room exploded causing sparks to fall to the floor, and finally the two guards that were in the entryway of the office were lifted into the air and screamed as every bone in their bodies were broken by the intensity of Anakin's use of the Force. The screams ceased moments later as they both dropped to the ground dead.

This rage continued to build until he finally released all of his emotions in a single angry wail "No!"

He had lost so much.

The loss of his mother.

The loss of his brother.

He thought he had suffered enough for one lifetime, but fate decided he was to lose you as well.

He hated the last memory he had of you was cradling your lifeless body in his arms. How cold and limp you felt.

He felt as if he should rip his hearts from his chest to stop the aching that continued to spread throughout.

Rage and sorrow were his constant companions. If he did not feel one, the other took its place.

His carefully laid plans now fueled by emotion, losing the calculating edge they once possessed. Focusing on carnage and viciousness rather than stealth and execution.

He would make everyone suffer as he had suffered. He swore it.

And late at night, when he was alone in his thoughts, he had visions. Visions of you.

You would be standing before him dressed in white flowing robes. An ethereal glow surrounding your being. Tears would flow from your eyes as you gazed at the shattered state of your beloved. Your hand cupping his face as you softly pleaded for him to turn from the path he had chosen. How this will not bring you back or give him peace.

And in turn, he would rest his head against your hand, allowing himself to be immersed in the dream. But then he would lift his head away from you, his amber eyes blazing with determination. He would promise that he would be reunited with you soon.

He was woken from his sleep to the feeling of vibrations. In his sleepy state, he initially thought a ship flew too closely overhead of the base. You were in the city after all. Then he realized the vibrations continued and they were too localized to be from a distant source. After becoming more alert, he realized that the source was right next to him: you. You were curled against him shivering intensely in his arms, a layer of sweat on your brow.

He reached out his hand so the back of it could feel your forehead. When he made contact, he could tell you were warm. Too warm.

“Y/n, my love, wake up.” He asked using the hand that took your temperature to cup your cheek and gently stroke it using his thumb.

“Cold. So cold.” You whisper sleepily, your eyes still closed as you nuzzled into his hand, enjoying the feeling of the new source of warmth.

That’s when his suspicions were confirmed. You had a fever. A very high fever. Any sleepiness that was left in him disappeared, as worry took its place.

High fevers on their own, could be treated by him easily. But a high fever at eight months pregnant? That was a bit more of a challenge. Now there was risk of the fever impacting you along with the baby, if he couldn’t bring it down.

Growing up on Dathomir, he learned basic practices for treating illnesses as there were no trained healers among the Nightbrothers in his village. If you fell ill to a sickness they didn’t know how to treat, you either recovered on your own or died. And he would be damned before letting either of you die.

Gently wrapping an arm underneath your legs and another under your shoulder blades, he lifted you so that your body was leaning against his as he maneuvered you both out of your shared bed. You groaned in protest as your joints ached painfully from movement.

“I know, my love. I know.” He soothed placing a soft kiss to your forehead. He continued making his way to the en suite bathroom. “Almost there.”

Once he was inside the bathroom, he placed you on the ground with your back leaning against the tile wall. “I’ll be right back.” He promised.

He then made his way to the bathtub, plugging the drain and turning the faucet ensuring that the water was lukewarm by running his hand under the stream that was falling into the tub. Once the tub began to fill with water, he returned to where you were sitting and began gently undressing you.

Still in a feverish daze, all you could do to aid your lover in undressing you was weakly lifting your arms over your head, so that he could remove your nightgown. Once you were free from any garments you were wearing, you felt yourself being once again carried until you were submerged in water up to your clavicle. The temperature of the water made you sharply inhale air.

Your lover gave you a look of sympathy before taking a washcloth, wetting it in the tub water, and then wringing any excess water out of it. He then proceeded to lightly dab the cloth across your forehead, face, and neck trying to cool you off and wipe off the layer of sweat that been caked on. “I’m sorry, my love. This will help bring your fever down. I promise.”

“Too cold. Need to be warmer.” You whisper shakily.

“No, that’s the fever talking. The water is right where it should be. Just a few more minutes and you can come out.” He says leaning forward and kissing the cheek closest to him. “You’re being so strong. Just a little more. You can do you that for me, right?”

You nod your head as your eyes flutter closed, trying your best to steady your breathing.

Finally after he deemed enough time had passed. He stood up and walked to a nearby folded pile of towels. Once he grabbed the largest one, he returned to your side and began helping you stand up from your position in the tub. Once you were standing as firmly as you could manage, he brought the towel over your shoulders and secured it so most of the areas that required warmth, stayed warm. He then gently helped you step out of the bathtub. Keeping you in your standing position, he then leaned forward to remove the plug from the drain to allow the water to drain out of the tub.

Having completed all his tasks in the bathroom, he once again picked you up and carried you to your shared bed. After having you gently placed on the bed so you were sitting upright, he took several steps to the left until he was in front of your dresser. He opened it and retrieved a fresh, clean nightgown and underwear for you. He made his way back to you, delicately removing the towel that was wrapped around your body.

Usually, he would take a moment to admire your naked form any chance he got. Especially now that you were swollen with his child. However, this wasn’t time to admire your ethereal beauty. He could do that when you were well.

Helping you into your new nightgown and undergarment, he softly guided you to your side of the bed, lifting the covers so you could slide in them. After making sure you were lying on your side, he lifted the sheets so that they covered you comfortably. He then made his way to his side of the bed and laid down letting the covers fall on him. He then scooted closer to you using one arm to reach around your back to bring your upper body to his chest, and the other arm placed so his hand rested on your stomach.

After you nuzzled into his chest, he softly began to purr, naturally trying to comfort you. And there you stayed until midday.

When you awoke you found that you were alone in bed. Your head feeling slightly clearer and less dazed. No longer did you feel chilled, but you still felt ill. You slowly brought yourself to a sitting position, with some difficulty thanks to the growing life inside you.

Taking in your surroundings, you noticed that your lover is not in the bedroom. And then you smelt it. The scent of something savory wafting in the air. You pushed yourself off the bed, letting your feet fall onto the cool metal floor. You follow your nose until you find yourself in the kitchen and see that your missing lover is busy pouring a steaming brown liquid into a mug.

Finishing his task and putting the pot back on the stove, he notices your presence. “You’re supposed to be resting.”

“I smelled something good and couldn’t help myself.” You say with a bashful smile. “What is it?”

“Bone broth. I thought it would be something safe for you to drink that could help get some strength back in you.” He smiled walking over and handing the mug to you.

You take the mug and bring it to your lips, tilting it forward slightly so you could sip some of the liquid. Warmth engulfs your body as soon as the broth touches your tongue. The savory and salty flavor soothing the hunger that was growing in your stomach.

“How is it?” He asked.

You nod your head, closing your eyes for a moment in contentment. “Really good.”

“How’re you feeling? You look better.” He asked as he brushed hair out of your face.

“Better, but still a bit sick.” You respond taking another sip of the broth.

“Well then let’s get you back to bed.” He says turning you around and leading back to your shared bedroom.

Once you were on your side of the bed, you placed your mug on the night stand next to it. You then climbed into bed and pulled the covers over yourself.

Your beloved stands over you, lifting his hand so that he could stroke your cheek. “You’ll be the death of me, if you wake me up like that again. I was so worried about you and the baby.”

“We’re alright, thanks to you. I knew I chose you for more than your good looks.” You say a tired smile on your face.

“Mmm glad I’m more than just a pretty face to you.” He chuckles before leaning forward to place a soft kiss on your lips. “Now get some more rest. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

First off, this man is praising the will of the Force, fate, deity, whomever or whatever is responsible for bringing you into his life.

In his world of anger, darkness, and vengeance you are light personified. Your smile stir hearts hidden within him that have been closed to all things for most of his life.

It doesn’t matter if you met him as a civilian or on a job, he refuses to have you involved in the underworld. You are familiar with his crew, as they are apart of your protection detail, but that’s as far as he allows it.

He has lost too many people in his life. He will not lose you in his quest for revenge.

Due to you not being involved in his underworld dealings, you often spend your time on base in your shared quarters. He does allow you to explore the nearby city, accompanied by him or one of the crew of course.

He is a busy man, so when he has the time, he spends it with you as much as possible. It could be anything from sharing a meal together to reading books together. Any time spent with you is worthwhile to him.

Due to the fact you spend most of your time on base and he’s often away from you, he strongly encourages any hobbies you may have. He’ll supply you with the finest materials, instruments, and books.

If you have any particular interests, Maul would be interested in hearing you discuss them. He would love if you both shared any so you could have hours long conversations about them.

We all know this man loves tea. And if you are not a particular fan of tea, by being in a relationship with him you will still gain an impressive knowledge about it.

Just because he won’t allow you to be involved in his less than savory activities, does not mean he is ignorant enough to believe that you are not in danger.

He teaches you self-defense. Hand-to hand. How to disarm an opponent. He even teaches you how to use a knife. You can take care of yourself, he makes sure of that.

If he comes to you after a long and frustrating day. Please offer to give this man a massage. The amount of tension this man carries on a daily basis could bend Beskar. And don’t think he won’t reciprocate the gesture. His large, warm hands are perfect for massaging away any tension you may have.

He prefers to be the big spoon in bed or have your head resting on his chest. Any position that allows him to place kisses on the top or back of your head. Forehead kisses are also acceptable.

He has night terrors. You can try to comfort him while it’s happening, but sometimes it’s best to let him wake up on his own. Just be there to comfort him afterwards. He’s more grateful for any help you give him than he could could ever put into words.

Overall, a relationship with Maul can be very loving and healthy. The only downside is certain freedoms you have are limited. But maybe one day, when Maul finally has exacted his revenge, you’ll have them back. One day.

You have no idea how you ended up in this situation. Well, that’s not entirely true.

You and Maul had been visiting a night market. A welcomed change of setting from spending your time at the hideout. When all of a sudden you both see a wailing child alone in the middle of the crowd.

Maul, instinctively trying to avoid bringing attention to himself, chose to ignore the child. Someone would come to collect them, eventually.

You made a different choice.

You weaved your way through the crowd until you were able to stand in front of the still crying child. You knelt down to be at the frighten child’s level. “Hello, little one. What’s the matter? Can’t find your parents?”

You now see that the child could not be more than two or three years old.

The now sniffling child babbles in a language you don’t know, adding a layer of difficulty in helping the child be reunited with its parents.

“It’s okay, little one. I’ll help you. First though, let’s get out of this crowd.” You say trying to further soothe the child before offering your hand.

The child chose to instead wrap its arms around your neck, signaling that they would rather be held.

“That works too.” You say to yourself as you lift the child up and make sure that they are comfortable in the position you were holding them.

Slowly you made your way back to Maul who now had his arms crossed in front of him and brows raised, waiting for your explanation.

“I couldn’t just leave them in the middle of crowd. What if something happened to them?” You reasoned.

“That would not have been our concern. However, it seems that does not matter. What is your plan?” He sighed, not enjoying having further attention brought to himself.

“Well going to the police station is out of the question. So our next best option would be to wait in the market for the parent to come back. Though I’m not sure how long that will ta-” You explain until you are interrupted by the loud sound of a growling stomach.

You both turn your heads to look at the source of the sound and find the child giggling at the attention now on them.

“Well then, it seems the child has already told us what our next move will be.” Maul says with a slight hint of amusement in his voice. “Wouldn’t want them to starve to death before being reunited with their parents.”

“Alright, little one, let’s get you something to eat.” You say as you begin to walk towards that section of the market dedicated to food. “You pick whatever looks the best to you.”

The three of you spend several minutes walking down different food stalls seeing all kinds of food for sale from produce to freshly cooked meat. Finally the child begins squirming in your arms and begins to excitedly point at a particular food stall.

“Goldcurrant scones? You certainly have a taste for the finer things in life.” You remark with a smile as you step closer to the stall to make your purchase.

The older woman running the stall smiles at you. “What can I get for you, dear?”

“One goldcurrant scone, please.” You answer.

“Of course.” She says turning her back to package one of the scones.

You reach into your pocket and pick out the necessary amount of credits to hand to her.

Once she turns back around you place the credits in one of her hands and then take the scone.

“Thank you for your business. By the way, you and your husband have such an adorable child.” She says with a smile.

You immediately feel blood rush to your face and your heart skip a beat at the compliment. “Oh they’re not-. He’s not-. Thank you.” You stammer out as you turn away from the merchant.

You make your way back to Maul who is only a few feet away. And close enough to hear the compliment you were just given. With a grin on his face, he places his hand at the small of your back. “Well wife. Let’s find a place for our child to sit.”

For a moment you swear you think your heart is going to explode.

You both make your way to a seating area and pick a table that has very few neighbors. Still trying to keep as low a profile as best you could.

After sitting down, you hand the scone to the child who squeals with glee as they take a bite of it.

You chuckle watching how happy the child is munching on the baked good before meeting Maul’s gaze across the table.

Often his gazes towards you communicated love, but this gaze was the softest you’d ever seen.

“What?” You ask breaking the silence between you.

“You’re really good at that. Being a mother.” He says to you softly.

“I don’t know about that.” You say shyly looking away from him.

You feel his gloved hand lightly take hold of chin and slowly turn your head until your e/c eyes meet his golden ones. “You are.”

A feeling of warmth pools in the pit of your stomach at the topic being discussed. Your cheeks flaring with a deep blush.

Given Maul’s line of work the topic of children was never discussed previously. A topic you felt would not end happily.

Yet now, you see that there’s a chance the conversation would not be so bittersweet.

A giggle breaks both your train of thoughts as you turn to see the child had finished eating the scone but not without having their cheeks covered in crumbs.

“Oh look at you. You’re a mess.” You say using your sleeve to wipe off the crumbs. “Someone has to teach you etiquette.”

The child giggles in response, before turning to face Maul and for a moment there is silence once again. Until the child leans forward against the table with their arms outstretched, wordlessly asking Maul to hold them.

You can see Maul’s posture tense at the toddler’s request.

“You don’t have to, if you’re not comfortable.” You say giving him an option to decline.

For a moment you see Maul’s posture relax as a cheeky grin grows on his face. “Now what kind of father would that make me?”

He stands and walks around the table until he is standing right in front of you and the child. He crouches down like he saw you do earlier and lifts the child under the shoulders. It takes him a minute to find a good position that is both secure and comfortable for the toddler before instinctively starting to sway back and forth.

You feel your heart melting at the scene in front of you. “You’re good at that. Being a father.”

Maul looks at you with a soft smile on his face at your parroted words.

Suddenly you hear a yell and the sound of approaching footsteps.

Maul immediately places the child back in your arms and stands in front of you both, his hand resting on his concealed lightsaber.

The yells and footsteps become louder until a man and a woman are standing front of you both pointing at the child in your arms. The child in turn, leans forward excitedly once again speaking in a language you didn’t know. However this time, you didn’t need to understand. You knew that these were the child’s parents.

You step forward from behind Maul and hand the child to the woman. Both parents give their word of thanks repeatedly and begin to walk off keeping the child close to both of them.

As you watch the parents walk off, you feel a lump grow in your throat as tears start to well up in your eyes.

While you were happy the child had been reunited with its parents, you were saddened that your time as a little family had come to an end.

You felt a hand wrap around your waist and bring you close until your head rested on the chest of your Zabrak.

“I am saddened too, my love. Come, let’s go home.” He says guiding you toward the exit of the night market.

As you both make your way through the hidden path back to the hideout. Maul breaks the somber silence between you.

“If we were to have child, I would like them to have better table manners by the time they were that child’s age.”

You feel a smile creep onto your face as you let out a small chuckle. “Yes, dear.”

You sigh in your seat at the kitchen table, as you wait for the kettle to boil. For weeks, you had been attempting to perfect making the favorite blend of tea of a certain Zabrak. Yet each time, the taste was off. Too weak, too bitter. And for the last few days, your attempts were close to the taste you sought. But close wasn’t good enough for you.

The desire to master this skill stemmed from your romantic relationship with Maul.

Being the leader of the Shadow Collective caused the former Sith Lord to be gone on missions for weeks at a time. And in that time apart you wondered what you could do to make his life better in some way. What could you do for the man who desired intangible things?

You could not give him the power he sought nor his revenge.

And then you thought back to the first time you and he shared tea.

It was in the early hours of deep night. He had been in his study, working through reports of necessary supplies to keep his collective operational, while you attempted to sleep in your shared bed.

Your attempt consisted of two hours of tossing and turning, until finally you admitted defeat and climbed out of bed. Padding your way barefoot to the doorway of his study. If you were awake you may as well check on him.

And there he sat, facing you but focused on his work as he held his hands in front of him on his desk.

You took another step forward to make your presence known, and based on his raised head, you succeeded.

“My dear, what are you doing out of bed? You should be asleep.” Maul asked pushing back his chair and standing up to walk towards you. “While I may be able to work into the late night, you need your rest.”

“I can’t sleep.” You shrug.

Maul sighed before wordlessly placing his hand on the small of your back to guide you out of the study. He continued guiding you until you found yourselves in the kitchen.

“Sit.” He stated walking ahead of you and pulling out a chair at the kitchen table for you.

As you took your seat, Maul turned to the stove and took the kettle to the sink to begin filling it with water. “Do you know how many cultures value tea not only as a drink, but as a form of art?”

“Thousands?” You guessed.

The galaxy was a pretty big place, after all.

“Hundreds of thousands.” He replied. “Tea is more than just something to drink, it can be medicinal, aid in conversation, and allow us to be in the present.”

He placed the kettle on the stove and turned it on. He then moved to a nearby cabinet and took out a teapot along with two cups. Once that was done, he grabbed a tray and placed the brass tea set on it and set it down on the table. He returned next to the same cabinet to retrieve a small box of tea leaves.

“Be in the present? You make it sound as if drinking tea is a form of meditation.” You say arching your brow with curiosity.

Setting the box of tea leaves on the table, Maul opened the lid to both the teapot and the box. “In a way, it can be.”

Using a small spoon he had grabbed earlier, he began to scoop tea leaves from the box to the teapot. “I have found that it serves to clear the mind of all thoughts, and allow you to ground yourself. A useful tool to have in these dark times.”

Once he deemed enough tea leaves had been used, he closed the box and returned it to its place in the cabinet. Closing the cabinet, Maul saw that the kettle on the stove was boiling, and proceeded to turn off the stove and bring the kettle to the table.

“Can you teach me, to ground myself?” You ask, your interest piqued.

Maul stopped tilting the kettle towards the opening in the teapot to look up and make eye contact with you, pondering your question for a moment, before silently nodding and resuming pouring the boiled water.

Several minutes had passed as Maul allowed the tea time to steep. Once he deemed enough time had passed, he poured tea into the two cups and then handed one to you.

“Note the warmth that emanates from the cup. How the heat spreads from the palm of your hand to your fingers. How the steam slowly billows its way higher into the air. And finally, before drinking, note the smell of the tea.” Maul instructed.

As you were about to inhale the scent of the tea, your eyes wandered from your cup to Maul’s face.

His eyes were closed as he took in an inhale of the tea’s aroma, and that’s when you saw it.

Gone was the tension he kept in his jaw, the furrow of his brow, the frown often etched on his face.

He looked peaceful.

And that was what you wanted to give him. A moment of peace. For so much of his life was filled with chaos.

“My love, are you alright?” A familiar voice asked breaking your train of thought and bringing you back to your seat at the table.

You turn to your right to find Maul standing in the doorway with a slight look of concern on his face.

You immediately smile while you stand up and rush to embrace him in a hug. “How long have you been back?”

You feel him slowly wrap his arms around you, placing a kiss on the top of your head. “A few minutes. Long enough though to see that the kettle has been boiling for quite a while.”

“I was distracted.” You responded with a sheepish grin.

“I can see that.” Maul stated, his voice and face tinged slightly in amusement. “So this is how my tea has been mysteriously disappearing.”

“I’ve been trying my hand at making tea.” You say not making eye contact with him after your secret was revealed.

“Well then, let’s see how well your practice has progressed.” He stated as he side stepped you to take a seat at the table.

You moved to the stove, switching it off and grabbing the kettle and bringing it to the table.

You began pouring the water into the teapot until it was filled to your desired amount. Returning the lid to the teapot, you placed the kettle back on the stove.

Now all that was left to do was wait.

“What made you suddenly so interested in making tea?” Maul asked, filling the pleasant silence that had fallen between you.

“I just wanted to have a go at it.” You say nonchalantly, avoiding eye contact with Maul, as if making eye contact with him would make your half truth fall apart.

“Hmm..” Was all that Maul responded verbally with, though based on his tone of voice you could tell he doubted your answer.

“The tea should be ready now.” You say, thankful for the change in focus.

You tilted the teapot to pour tea in both cups, careful not to spill or cause an overflow. Gently you placed a cup in front of Maul.

Maul’s eyes narrowed slightly, noting the sense of eagerness that you were beginning to fail to conceal.

After placing your cup in front of your seat, you waited for Maul to take a sip.

Sensing that you would wait to drink your tea until he had tried his, he brought the tea closer to his face. Inhaling the light floral aroma from the tea, Maul could feel the muscles in his shoulders and back become less rigid. His brows unfurrowing from their usual resting place as he let out a sigh before taking a sip.

The light floral flavor engulfed his tastebuds leaving one final note of sweetness before disappearing.

In that moment, he was not Maul the leader of the Shadow Collective or the personification of vengeance. He was just a man sitting at the kitchen table in front of the person he loved more than anything in the galaxy.

“How is it, love?” You ask breaking his train of thought.

Maul’s amber gold eyes met yours as a small genuine smile formed on his face.

Hidden. Safe. Unknown.

These were the words used to describe the act of separating you from the man you loved and being forced to live in secret with your two infant children.

Every day while you are grateful to have two healthy and beautiful children, you can't help but imagine what life would've been like had you been successful in persuading Anakin. You wonder how he would've held your children for the first time, or how he'd soothe their midnight wails.

As you look over at the right side of the bed, your heart aches slightly. The idea of seeing his peaceful sleeping face makes the pain hurt even more.

Your marriage to him was one of the best decisions of your life. You had met Anakin when he first came to the Jedi temple after he became Obi-wan's padawan. You both became good friends and over the years acknowledged your romantic feelings for each other. However, you understood that if either of you were found out, you would both be expelled from the Order. You decided to leave The Order after the Battle of Geonosis. While you were saddened to leave, you knew that it was the best for the both of you. Already Anakin had the makings to be an excellent general as the Clone Wars began. He was even given the nickname 'The Hero Without Fear'. One year after your departure, you both married in secret. You found work in the botanical gardens on the upper level of Coruscant as you had a natural affinity for horticulture. This allowed you to have an apartment near the Temple so you could spend time together away from watchful eyes.

Finally after what felt like an eternity of staring at the ceiling, you felt your eyes grow heavy and your anxiousness fade. And after several minutes you were able to fall asleep.

You found yourself where the embers of your love for Anakin became roaring flames: the Nabbrie Villa on Naboo. You both were assigned to protect Senator Amidala after several threats were made on her life. As you both were away from your masters, the mutual attraction between you escalated into love. However, as you approached the balcony overlooking the lake, it was not Anakin as a padawan whose back was facing you, but an older Anakin, one you had not seen before. Gone was the short hair and padawan braid, replaced by longer luscious waves of hair that you had never seen him wear, even before the twins were born.

Still, even with the change in his hair, the way he held his hands clasped behind his back added to the certainty that this was your husband. And it seemed that just as you had realized who he was, he sensed who you were, and he turned around. It was a bittersweet moment to look into the eyes of the man you loved and then remember the sensation of invisible hands wrapped around your throat.

Looking into his cerulean blue eyes, he was still your husband. Though based on the bags under his eyes, he had been having trouble sleeping recently. You had a feeling your last encounter had something to do with that.

Finally, he was the one to break the silence between you: “This isn’t real.”

You nodded your head in agreement. “It’s a dream.”

He nodded his head in agreement, but did not continue the conversation.

“Nightmares?” You asked pointing to your under eyes.

He scoffed bitterly. “Why do you care? You’re dead. Our child is dead. Nothing is real here. No matter how much I want it to be.”

You didn’t respond to his comment, instead choosing to walk over next to him and lean over the railing of the balcony to have a better look at the lake. It was still as beautiful and picturesque as you remembered. “Do you remember this moment? It was the morning after you had the nightmare about your mother.”

“Of course I remember. I was meditating and you came to check on me. I could have sensed your worry and concern from the other side of the planet.” He grumbled.

“Yes, well, you didn’t worry about yourself enough, so I worried for the both of us.” You mumbled looking to see his response.

You saw a small smile flash across his face, but it quickly morphed into a deep scowl. “Enough.”

“Enough of what?” You asked crossing your arms turning to face him.

“This. All of this. You’re not real! I killed you. I’m the monster who murdered his pregnant wife! I don’t deserve to have pleasant dreams about love, happiness, or of anything good. Only nightmares about watching myself kill you over and over again. About having to see your face as I choked the life out of you!” He yelled.

“Hey! You don’t get to be angry! I’m the one who should be angry. It wasn’t just my life that you affected, because of you, my friends are gone, my master was murdered, and I-“ You yelled back, your voice growing in volume with each word, but caught yourself before you said “nearly died.”

A strained silence fell between you both as you tried your best to keep your composure. This, you thought, was all that was left of your husband’s feelings towards you: anger and resentment.

You tried your best to bite back the sob welling up in your throat at this realization, you covered your mouth with your hand in an attempt to muffle it as it escaped and looked to see if Anakin had heard it. And as you looked, at the the man you once and somehow still loved, you saw tears falling down his cheeks. In a moment of what seemed to be mutual sorrow, you reached your hand out to hold his, a reflex to comfort him, but as soon as you did, you retracted your hand. A warmness engulfed your being that you thought had been extinguished: Your force bond.

The villa faded away morphing into what looked like officer quarters on a ship. Durasteel walls facing three sides, save for a window that allowed for a view of the passing stars.

It was as if all of the anger faded from Anakin’s face and was instead replaced with awe as he turned to face you fully. He slowly reached out his hand and made sure that you were comfortable with his actions. When it appeared you were, he gently held your cheek in his gloved right hand. It was if he needed to be sure you were real. You leaned into his caress having done so countless times before, your action almost instinctive.

The tears of sorrow were replaced with tears of joy. “You’re alive.”

As you were about to speak, the window of the quarters suddenly shattered, causing a vacuum to pull you from Anakin’s touch and into the cold space, unable to do any other action except scream his name. The coldness and lack of oxygen caused your vision to fade to blackness.

You gasped awake sitting up in your bed. You greedily inhaled as much of the air as you could, your heart still racing from the dream. Trying to process what you've just done. The one being in the universe who should've thought you were dead, now knew that you are alive. And that brought you more joy than it should.

After months of having to stay silent while the one man you'd ever loved thought you were dead, was one of the most agonizing things you had to do.