Tiger Tiger Burning Bright

“I promise I’ll stay on my side of the bed.”

“at least let me clean the wound!” “you’ll be even worse off if you don’t let me bandage this.” “i really think you need to see a doctor.” “i made you some soup, and i’m going to sit here until you eat it. i can wait.” “your feelings matter too! i can’t help you if i don’t even know what’s making you upset!” “..i’m here if you need anything, okay?” “stop trying to push yourself! you can’t do this on your own!” “listen, i know you don’t want to, but.. maybe you should rest for a while. you’re not going to get anywhere like this.” “i’ll make you a deal: i’ll just get you some bandages, and nothing else, and you stop making a fuss over it.” “how long has it last been since you slept?” “have you even been taking your medicine?” “i know you think you have to get through this by yourself, but you have people here to help you.” “let me take care of you, for once.” “you’re gonna hurt yourself even more if you do stupid things like that!” “i hate to break it to you, but you’re not supposed to do any strenuous physical activity for the next couple weeks, and if i have to personally make sure you don’t every waking hour of the day then i’m fully prepared to do that.” “it’s okay to cry in front of me, you know. you don’t have to carry this alone.” “stop trying to act like you’re not bleeding out in front of me!! this is serious!” “listen, asshole. i’m gonna carry you home whether you like it or not. you’re not in any condition to get there yourself.” “oh my god, why didn’t you tell me it was this bad?!”

Han Kang, Human Acts (translated by Deborah Smith)

ÖZGE YAGIZ & TOLGA MENDI Sol Yanim

“I don’t feel so good.” “It’s seeping through the bandages.” “My head is throbbing. I think I have a concussion.” “I can barely breathe, it hurts so bad!” “It looks worse than it is. I’m sure it’ll be gone in a couple of days…” “You should see the other one.” “Don’t look at me like that. I don’t want your pity.” “It was my fault, really. I wasn’t paying attention and got hit in the face.” “Getting stabbed wasn’t really on my bucket list.” “I don’t think I can walk.” “Leave me behind, please. I’m just going to slow you down.” “Am I going to die?” “I can’t stop the bleeding.” “I think the bruise matches my eye color.” “Don’t touch it, please! It hurts.” “I don’t want to go to a hospital. I hate doctors!”

closeup of a golden tabby tiger.

’ I want to play a game. ’ ’ My name is Very Fucking Confused; what’s your name? ’ ’ Most people are so ungrateful to be alive, but not you, not any more… ’ ’ I’m having a blast! This is the most fun I’ve had without lubricant! ’ ’ I want you to make a choice. ’ ’ Listen carefully, if you will. There are rules. ’ ’ What’s the last thing you remember? ’ ’ I went to bed in my shithole apartment, and I woke up in an actual shithole. ’ ’ I’m sick from the disease eating away at me inside… ’ ’ I’m sick of people who don’t appreciate their blessings… ’ ’ I’m a kill you, you sick asshole! ’ ’ Congratulations. You are still alive. ’ ’ Most people are so ungrateful to be alive. But not you. ’ ’ You don’t know me, but I know you. ’ ’ Live or die, make your choice. ’ ’ You’re probably wondering where you are. ’ ’ Now I see you as a strange mix of someone angry, yet apathetic. ’ ’ At least we’ll have the cover of darkness. ’ ’ Help! Someone help me! Is someone there? ’ ’ Hey! Oh shit, I’m probably dead. ’ ’ Who said anything about a warrant? ’ ’ If you are so sick then why do I have so many photos of you up and about? ’ ’ How much blood will you shed to stay alive? ’ ’ I’ll leave you in this room to rot. ’ ’ I know it’s you, you son of a bitch! ’ ’ My camera, it doesn’t know how to lie. ’ ’ You tell anyone you were here? ’ ’ Stop the lies! You’re a liar! I need to know the truth! ’ ’ You don’t recall getting your picture taken in that parking lot? ’ ’ How can you go through life pretending that you’re happy? ’ ’ Does that mean you saw what happened to me? ’ ’ Oh for fuck’s sake! I give up! ’ ’ You think it is over, but the games have just begun. ’ ’ You feel you now have control, don’t you? ’ ’ I don’t have a fucking soul… ’ ’ Will you learn how to let go and truly save them? ’ ’ What you can’t do, is save everyone. ’ ’ I promise that my work will continue. ’ ’ If you can’t do it for me, do it for yourself. ’ ’ I do, but addiction has ruined your life. ’ ’ I’m bleeding man. Please just let me go. ’ ’ Killing is distasteful… to me. ’ ’ How did you walk out of that building? ’ ’ So unless you’ve got something else to say… back the fuck off. ’ ’ Playing with matches again? ’ ’ I want to know if you have what it takes to survive. ’ ’ They say imitation is the most sincere form of flattery… ’ ’ We killed eight people and stole a property and nobody cared. ’ ’ Why? Was it for money? This was your plan? ’ ’ You’re a monster! ’ ’ Fix me, you motherfucker! ’ ’ Why don’t you fucking tell me something that I don’t know, you stupid cunt?! ’ ’ For three years I wanted to kill you. ’ ’ I’m never gonna be able to forgive myself for what happened. ’ ’ You may not remember me, but I most certainly remember you. ’ ’ There’s no preventative treatment for what you have. ’ ’ Please don’t do this to me. I have a family. ’ ’ You’re asking me to do the impossible. ’ ’ I’m sorry, but your own actions have caused this. ’ ’ What?! What am I supposed to learn from this?! ’ ’ This is the piece taken from the latest victim. ’ ’ How many next times are there gonna be? ’ ’ Get used to me, ‘cause I’m not going anywhere. ’ ’ When the time’s right, you’ll know what to do with it. ’ ’ That rolled off your tongue real smooth. ’ ’ Wait! What the fuck are you doing?! ’ ’ Please don’t let me die! Please don’t! ’ ’ Oh, well that’s it, isn’t it?! It’s over! ’ ’ Look at me! When you’re killing me, you look at me! ’ ’ I never saw any indication of psychotic behavior. ’ ’ You can never really tell what someone’s thinking on the inside. ’ ’ Well, there’s a problem with that, though. ’ ’ Go on, fucking pussy! Go! Go! Go! ’ ’ Maybe addiction’s just part of human nature. ’ ’ Remember, don’t trust the one who saves you. ’ ’ You want a chance? I’ll give you a chance. ’ ’ What do you mean you don’t know about this? ’ ’ You didn’t cut your own arm off? ’ ’ What condition? There is no condition. ’ ’ I didn’t have it penciled in on my schedule. ’ ’ It’s not the first time some psychopath called me out. ’ ’ That’s a problem you’re gonna have to solve before it’s too late. ’ ’ How do you just wake up in a room and have no idea where you are? ’ ’ I guess you’ve never been drunk before. ’ ’ I spent three years at college drunk. ’ ’ You asked me what I wanted and I told you. ’ ’ You seem to know a whole lot about me. ’ ’ I feel a whole lot of things right now. ’ ’ The only dooryou know how to open… is between your legs! ’ ’ Why don’t you shut the hell up?! ’ ’ That’s your luck, bending on over in prison, you little dickhead! ’ ’ If you’re gonna threaten me with a knife, you might as well cut me a little. ’ ’ You savor everything, be it a glass of water or a walk in the park. ’ ’ It’s the tool, thats going to save your soul. ’ ’ I didn’t do anything to you! ’ ’ Don’t open the door! ’ ’ You have to save yourself. ’ ’ Do you wanna play a game? ’ ’ That’s exactly it, you didn’t do anything. ’ ’ You identify more with a cold corpse than you do with a living human. ’ ’ You should know better than anyone, what happens then. ’ ’ I go for the neck, but I’m not the brain surgeon. ’ ’ Now you better start fucking paying attention. ’ ’ Suffering? You haven’t seen anything yet. ’ ’ Yeah, that’s right. I’m a murderer. ’ ’ So, do you have everything you need? ’ ’ You’d be surprised what tools can save a life. ’ ’ Then help me! Fix me! Fix me motherfucker! I’m standing right here! ’ ’ You have to play by the fucking rules! ’ ’ The human body is a miraculous creation. ’ ’ Game over. ’

― Friedrich W. Nietzsche  ©

Morning Rituals Full res linked here