Several months after my Sayeon post and I feel like I need to add a follow up. Anyone who looks at Sayeon and calls her a psychopath or a sociopath, who questions her ability to feel empathy or guilt... I don't know how to break it to you, almost everything wrong with Sayeon nowadays is literally a product of her extreme childhood guilt.
Everything she's ever done is out of guilt, constantly apologising for existing but also wanting to justify her existence. That's her duality. She desperately wants the people she cares about to be safe, to the point of obsession. She doesn't trust other people to be safe if she's not there, she doesn't believe she's worthy of being alive but she desperately wants to be told otherwise. That's why she's always proving herself, making herself irreplaceable, perfect. She literally keeps asking Ryujin if she hates her and rewinds the timeline when Ryujin says she doesn't BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T BELIEVE HER and she doesn't need anyone to see her be vulnerable.
She's a very traumatised child getting thrown into a literal dog eat dog world and trying to survive, keep her cellmates safe, while watching the system she desperately clung to as the absolute opposition to her sister's underworld (and thus as an "absolute good") prove itself to be just as corrupt if not more than the literal crime syndicates she swore she would never be a part of. She spent her entire life destroying herself inside and out because it was her only chance at escaping her sister and the criminal underworld she knew she was born from. And out of every career option she chose CRIMINAL PROSECUTOR.
She asked if "a parent being guilty of a crime makes the children guilty by proxy" she said with full conviction that since Sara Lee killed an innocent daughter she should have her family (specifically her daughters) killed as well like? How is it not obvious? She's not talking about some abstract daughters or about Samin, she's talking about herself. The more she learns about her mother and her sister's crimes the more she understands that she should be punished alongside them, but she doesn't want to! Because she wants to live! So everything she does is to prove to herself that she doesn't deserve the same fate as her family!
