The Wizard, trying to convince Elphaba to help him: Weâre doing one small murdery thing for a bigger, better reason. The ends justify the means!

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@wicked-shitposts
The Wizard, trying to convince Elphaba to help him: Weâre doing one small murdery thing for a bigger, better reason. The ends justify the means!

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Glinda: you canât do this to me!
Elphaba: this is not a democracy.
Fiyero: will you please stop playing Uno so loudly?
Elphaba: A peaceful life sounds nice :)
Elphaba, five seconds later: Im going to wreak havoc on the world.
Fiyero: haha I havenât showered since last year :)
Elphaba: itâs January 14th thatâs disgusting.
Fiyero: Youâre one to talk.
Glinda: Please donât talk to me today. I barely got 10 hours of sleep last night.

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whenever you donât post for a few days I get very concerned that youâre going to disappear again
dw the semester is over so Im funny again
if wicked took place in like a real world 2023 setting Fiyero would be an influencer
Me: itâs just fiction itâs not that deep
Also me: What does Elphaba drink? How does she bathe? What is the exact percentage of water that makes it toxic? Is has to be the hydrogen atom sheâs allergic to since sheâs not allergic to oxygen, but then sheâd also be allergic to sugar. Is it the combo? I donât understand. Someone explain.
Fiyero on January 1st: I havenât showered since last year haha.
Elphaba: I havenât been able to shower ever.

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Elphaba, planning to release the lion cub: feeling a little silly. Might go commit some tomfoolery later. Maybe even some shenanigans.
Glinda: I have him blocked on Pinterest.
Elphaba: How badly do you have to fuck up to get blocked on Pinterest?
Glinda: badly.
Madame Morrible: Because of Mr. Tigelaarâs actions, you will all be staying after the bell.
Boq: Group punishment is a violation of the Geneva Convention!
Madame Morrible: Sit down, Mr. Boq.
Boq: Yes maâam.
Glinda: My New Yearâs resolution is to drink more water :)
Elphaba: must be nice.
me after successfully getting my password to this account reset

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Flight Attendant: Is there a doctor on this plan?!
Boq: Yes!
Elphaba: Boq, you have a PhD. She means a medical doctor.
Boq: You donât know that.
Wait okay would this have not melted her?
im so upset you guys didnât like my phd joke that shit was funny