#StateOfMind

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She didn't jump off the boat.

She wanted to.... But she didn't.

For years and years she cried about taking the leap

But as much as her feet itched to go off the edge.

The fire in her heart for the ones on board pushed her to stay.

And when it finally seemed like she no longer needed what was waiting on the other side.

When we finally thought hey, maybe this time it's actually going to be okay.

Cause everyone would fix their eyes on the one threatening to jump off the boat.

Did you even notice that I left the boat?

Or did you just assume that I knew how to swim?

One never wants to leave and one is never there. Nobody pays any attention to the latter.

Then again why would they? there was always a good reason behind the absence.

Ever wondered why I was never there? Ever asked yourself what exactly it was that I was trying so hard to escape?

Mental breakdowns come in their various forms and sizes. The ones waving red flags and threatening to jump are usually noticed but the ones smiling at you as they sink. Those ones you won't notice until they're six feet under and all they've left you with are question marks.

That I still find happiness outside of you

It doesn't seem fair...

Even when you win

Ever feel like it's cause deep down you know that you yourself are really not enough?