The Bare Minimum Is Not A Love Language: Why This Generation’s Standards Are In The Gutter
Let’s get one thing straight right now: if I have to write an article explaining the basics of being in a relationship to a generation glued to their notifications, we are already in a spiritual crisis. We are walking around with iPhones that have more processing power than a NASA computer, yet somehow, common decency in love has been deleted from the system.
We need to talk about the absolute bare minimum, and how half of you are treating it like a grand romantic gesture.
It starts in the morning. You wake up next to your person. Their hair is a mess, their breath could knock out a horse, and they’re still the one you chose. The move? A “good morning” whispered into the skin, a kiss on the forehead, a hug before your feet even hit the floor. That’s the foundation. That’s the "we in this together" energy.
But if you aren’t waking up together? Fine. Life happens. So then it becomes the Good Morning Text. Not a "wyd" at 2 p.m. because you finally rolled out of bed. An actual text. A phone call. Something that says, "Yo, I was thinking about you before the world got a chance to get in my head."
But instead, we’ve created a generation that can fire off a meme to a group chat at 7 a.m., yet can’t send a simple "morning, hope you sleep well" to the person they claim to love. You’re quick to hit "like" on a TikTok your friend sent, but the person laying right next to you? Ghost mode.
And speaking of laying right next to you: if you are in the bed, your partner is laying there awake, and you decide to get up and leave them in the bed alone to go sit on the couch and scroll—what are we doing? You just abandoned the huddle. You left the warm to go sit in the cold alone. That’s not independence, that’s isolation. You are physically present but emotionally absent.
Then comes the evening. The TV is on. The game is on your phone. You are in a full digital coma. But the second your phone buzzes with a friend’s drama? You’re alert. You’re responsive. You’re tending to everybody’s needs except the one breathing next to you. You’re giving your attention to the world outside your door while the person inside your door starves for connection.
That is backward. That is broken.
Real love? Real partnership? It’s the check-ins. It’s the random videos sent throughout the day that say, "I saw this and thought of you." It’s the gifs that make them laugh in the middle of a stressful workday. It’s the "you good?" texts that aren't about suspicion, but about genuine care.
We are so busy trying to curate a perfect love life for the highlight reel that we forget to actually live it. We’ve traded intimacy for convenience. We’ve traded presence for a notification.
It’s fucked up. It’s bad out here. And the scary part? Most people don’t even realize they’re starving because they’ve never been fed.
Put the phone down when they’re in the room. Stay in the bed for five extra minutes. Send the damn text. It ain't rocket science. It’s just love. And right now, we’re failing at it. -Wezzy
