.

           you've got your passion, you've got your pride               but don't you know that only fools are satisfied ?       dream on, but don't imagine they'll all come true.            

please. ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ 

near was born into an average household of two induvials who liked the idea of having a child more than actually having for one. being autistic, nate wasn’t behaving in the way that they expected a child to act.  born in a year where autistic children were still seen as something to be fixed, his parents agreed that if he didn’t show signs of regulating by the time he was three, that they would give him up. he’s yet to speak, he doesn’t emotionally respond, and only cries when they move his toys in a manner that appears to bother him. they lost interest quickly, never having paid enough attention to notice his other gifts. ( something akin to matilda. )

they drop him off at a local orphanage. living close to winchester, england, it isn’t long before he’s moved to watari’s wammy house once his intelligence is realized. 

it’s hard to process. the boy further recedes and is considered difficult to work with. this isn’t anything new to watari, however. and he’s offered time to adjust. slowly, he explores. finding that with “good” behavior he’s rewarded and given puzzles and trinkets - complex problems that bring him joy to solve. 

when he turns four, after a year of finally making sense of everything, he finds that he doesn’t exactly mind no longer seeing his parents. the kids aren’t the kindest, but there’s an older boy like him.

L is quiet, and doesn’t mind sitting in silence. he doesn’t try to force near to talk, and sometimes he shares his sweets ( even if the young boy isn’t supposed to have them. ). in an attempt to show appreciation for his first friend, nate begins coping his mannerisms. he sits like him, holds things like him, wears white and stops brushing his hair. 

it’s L that near speaks to for the first time. 

but then L leaves. near has always been alone, and can’t figure out why it hurts. he chalks it up to being overwhelmed via his routine changing - which likely adds to his stress. he decides he’s going to be fine, and that is that.

he turns to his studies. doing better and better without trying, it’s nice. it worsens the treatment he receives from other students, but he never interacted with them much. why should he care.

an issue arises, however: people are comparing him to L. to the first family member he ever had. with the other gone, he’s back to being something he’s not. he isn’t near, or nate, or just a simple boy. once again, he’s being forced into a category that just isn’t him. it doesn’t help that witch each passing day, resentment grows.

how could his family leave him again ?

L comes to visit soon, though. near is 8, and already expected to fill a shadow that swallows him whole. when he arrives, nate ignores him.. staying in his room and trying to distract himself from the anxiety creeping in. noticing his absence, lawliet finds a moment to peel away and visit his younger friend. 

but he’s acting like they can just pick up where they left off - and they can’t. that’s not fair. he doesn’t get to just do that. the boy ignores him, focusing on the white puzzle in front of him. falling into old traditions, L sits next to him and offer’s him a piece of candy. rather than happily except it, near can only reply with a void: i’m not supposed to have sweets.

he insist. so near takes it, emotions bubbling over as he does. so, he throws it across the room with enough force that it shatters against the wall. it’s here that watari walks in, tension thick he asks’ what’s going on - L answers for them, assuring that it was nothing. he just wanted to check up on all students, nate included.

he leaves. 

watari begins talking to L about his successors: mello and near. when he get’s to near, he mentions how similar the two are. that the others tease the boy about it. for either not realizing or not caring, watari doesn’t mention the effects this has on him. L knows better. he knows there’s something he should do, but for now, he needs to focus on the case at hand. he’ll come back later.

near is masc nb. using he/they pronouns. 

he does like affection. however with very specific induvials and on his terms. he won’t react well if you just walk up and hug him without a warning or trying to be overly affectionate.

they have a very complicated view / bond with L. while they know that it isn’t his fault of how they were raised, they still can’t help but feel that he holds some responsibility. 

being compared to L so often was nearly traumatizing. it hurts them to know that those who look at him only see a mimic of the other. nate doesn’t hold much self worth regarding their internal view of themselves. all they see is a clone / copy of the man they’re supposed to replace. 

he is absolutely the kind of person to do something strange in a room with one person as a prank, say “no one will believe you,” and then leave.

they know how to ballroom dance, and have training in ballet.

they know how to play a tiny bit of guitar, however have full mastery of the harp.