Final Message

She shouldn’t have said that. Trench and Darling were friends, being so casual about what he did and went through was only hurtful.

She caught what Darling was implying as well. It definitely seemed like a good idea, making him and Emily joint heads of research - he’s the only reason there was still a Bureau to save when she arrived. Still, she wondered how Emily would react. Would she feel like her potential was being undermined, that Jesse didn’t actually trust her? But Darling wouldn’t be her boss, he’d be her partner. And if she didn’t, Darling would think she didn’t trust him.

“As long as you don’t try to manage her projects and yours.” Jesse finally said. “She needs to be able to prove herself.”

There was probably enough research to go around anyway.

     Dr. Darling snaps out of a daze of Trench thoughts completely now, the pity and guilt being pushed away. He’ll have to unpack that later, possibly when he’s alone-- which could be never. He smiles, slightly and sadly, comprehending what the current Director was saying and knowing full well he made a lot of mistakes in the past that could affect his and Emily’s current work relationship. He put her aside too much, he hid so many things from the other researcher... he feel ashamed to admit it. But that was just how things went. He tricked himself into believing it was for her own benefit-- but that was not the case, he knew it. Casper feared for himself and only himself.

Jesse nodded and blew out a breath. “And the Hiss twisted that. Made him release it into the Bureau. Something else like the Hiss could do the same thing.”

Like the Former. Or the Board.

“We need something stronger than the HRAs. Something that can shield the entire Oldest House.”

     Dr. Darling nods, however, absently. It’s barely input but he can’t stop thinking through it. He knows the new Director is right, but also-- he’s too hung up on losing his closest friend and being reminded of it. It hurt, more than he wanted to admit. Even if the argument and fighting, Trench mattered to him more than anybody else in the building... Casper knew why. But wouldn’t admit it.

Pre-established relationship meme || Status: accepting

Casper & Zeke ( @sollumin​ )

FRIENDSHIP.     childhood friends  /  work buddies or coworkers  /  family friends  /  friends with benefits  /  smoking buddies  /  adventure buddies  /  fake friends  /  recently friends  /  party buddies  /  friendship of need  /  dying friendship  /  circumstantial friendship  /  partners in crime  /  old friendship  /  [ your muse ] is the good influence  /  [ your muse ] is the bad influence  /  [ my muse ] is the good influence  /  [ my muse ] is the bad influence  /  opposites attract  /  ride or die  /  frenemies  /  roommates or flatmates  /  penpals  /  exes to friends  /  enemies to friends  /  other .

ROMANCE.     childhood sweethearts  /  [ your muse is mines ] childhood crush  /  [ my muse is yours ] childhood crush  /  exes  /  exes to lovers  /  forbidden lovers  /  highschool sweethearts  /  secret relationship  /  opposites attract  /  long distance  /  unrequited [ from your muses side ]  /  unrequited [ from my muses side ]  /  unrequited [ from both sides ]  /  skinny love  /  friends to lovers  /  enemies to lovers  /  spurious relationship  /  power couple  /  newly entered  /  soulmates [ metaphorical ]  /  soulmates  [ literal ]  /  awkward  /  turning toxic  /  toxic love  /  cheating [ on your muse ]  /  cheating [ with your muse ]  /  other .

FAMILIAL.     siblings [ half ]  /  siblings [ step ]  /  [ my muse ] is an older sibling figure to your younger sibling figure  /  [ my muse ] is a younger sibling figure to your older sibling figure muse  /  [ my muse ] is a parental figure to yours  /  [ my muse ] is a child figure to your muse  /  guardian figure  /  legal guardian  /  adoptive child  /  foster child  /  [ your muse ] is taken under mines wing  /  [ my muse ] is taken under yours wing  /  other .

@sollumin ||  Things that are hard to hear Status: No longer accepting 

     ❝Zeke, what--? I’m not... I’m...❞ Dr. Darling sighs then shakes his head. As he looks directly at the younger’s eyes, he weighs his options of what to say or how to respond. It wasn’t easy to decide, wasn’t easy to figure out. The reality of the situation, as it was, Casper didn’t want to admit most truths about his personal life to himself. Didn’t need that struggle. It was easier to ignore the misery and play dumb...  But he needed to reply now, make it known. Stop it from returning. ❝Maybe you’re right, but I don’t see a point in bringing this to me. I’m fine with this.❞

〚 ❣ 〛 He seems so disoriented, though can she really blame him? Being stuck here for who even knows how long? So many people thought he was dead, or at least that his mortal body had passed, even if his consciousness was still behind looking for answers. Darling doesn’t seem to directly speak to her, asking questions and looking around as if thinking, processing a lot of information quickly. It might be a while before she gets any answers from him at all.

“Yeah, I’m the new director,” she says, holding the service weapon for him to see. She assumes he knows what her having it means. Maybe even knows how terrifying the responsibilities that have been placed on her shoulders are. A lost girl looking for her brother, working years as a janitor, lived a couple years in a mental hospital, alone and searching - only to wind up as director of an entire federal bureau. “Trench died right as I got here. He…” He shot himself, but she doesn’t say it. It seems like too much to put on his shoulders right then. So she follows the topic change gladly.

“Alive? Um…Arish, Emily, Marshall, Langston, Underhill, Ahti…a lot more.” And a lot more who aren’t alive, but that’s a longer list than Jesse can pull up offhand. “Everyone’s been doing really well. Better than I think people have any right to. Some are scared, but a lot are fascinated It’s…” Overwhelming. “Interesting.”

     The scientist nods, absently, as he listens. He knows, of course, he obviously knows, that if she has the service weapon that Trench is not really... around, anymore. It feels like it should weigh him down more, but everything has been happening so much lately, that he’s just content being lost in this absent feeling of emptiness. Lack of emotion running through him, besides light fear and serious confusion. No sense of time here, so really he has no clue how long he’s been here. But that is beside the point. 

   ❝Good, then I believe that you have a full team working on this? That’s great.❞ He rushes past this, his hands meeting to begin fidgeting more. Casper tries to tell himself-- “You’re ok, calm down. You don’t have to panic this hard.” but it’s moot, he’ll have to figure this out later. ❝So the question remains-- how can I help? You probably already have a new head of research and I did leave most accounts of my findings in The Oldest House... What is it that I can do for you now?❞

Zeke must have been getting better at this whole ‘city’ thing, it was evident from having an easier time with keeping close to Darling and weaving fluidly through the crowds that moved and pushed their way through. It was a reflection that left the younger man proud of himself, feeling like he might actually stand a chance here. A possible opportunity to explore for himself, once Darling goes back to work.  As they walked and Casper spoke to him, a smile grew on his lips. He felt privileged but a little sad for the older man. It’s not like Darling was the hardest person to approach– sure he looked business-minded, whimsical but who wouldn’t want a friend like that?  “I would never turn down a chance to spend time with you, Cas’! I’m having a blast so far, thanks to you! You could ask me to watch paint dry on the cement and I would gladly accept it-er, you know.. if you’re into that kind of thing.”  Stopping where Darling stopped in order to answer his phone, Zeke adjusted the hood of his hoodie and shook off the accumulated water already soaking it’s fabric. He chuckled to his own words, not noticing Darling on his phone until he heard the man’s name from before. Trench. An instant knot that stopped him in his tracks, only tightening to see his friend’s expression that followed with it. He felt sickened, anger at it’s fringes as Zeke fought the urge to grab Darling’s phone once more and smash it to the cement below- once and for all.  “Give me the phone, Cas’. I’ll make it HIS problem..”  He hissed, holding his hand out. 

    Darling doesn’t like the aggression in Zeke’s voice, instead, he chooses to turn away then panicked and look around the area. Feeling like he might as well be watched by the omnipresent big brother then. It doesn’t take much to realize he doesn’t like it.

    “The problem is that you fucked off for the day, leaving the entire Research Department screwed and useless.”

    ❝They’re smart kids, they can manage--❞

     “I don’t give a shit how smart you think they are, they can’t do shit without you. So, tell me, was the Zoo nice?” Trench was scowling for sure, but Casper could bet he snarled at that, pitching his voice in the last part. It scares the scientist, how the hell does the Director know all of this? Uncomfortable, the doc turns back to Zeke, and pleads for advice with his eyes. 

    ❝I have no idea what you’re talking about--❞ Darling says, anxious, afterward hanging up the phone as he hears the other man begin to speak and staring at it for a good several seconds. It doesn’t ring again. ❝This isn’t going well...❞ Casper mutters, eyes glossing over. This was, in fact, going terribly wrong.

     He looks at the boy, still the same expression on his face. In all honesty, the doc looked like he was about to sob again. Why was the world being so unfair, when he just wanted one day off. 

Funny, that he’s not at his best at these gatherings while being so versed in the social; after all his doctorate is well earned. At least, Gillian himself thinks of it with some amusement. Talk here is easy to slip in and out of, anyway. He’s just on the rim of a conversation among colleagues when that small circle is interrupted and it warps itself to accommodate the man.

“You have?”  He needn’t act so stunned—the one settled next to—nor shoot out the question, but when Gillian looks at him he’s obviously trying to place him. Climbing nearer to the top of academics, as elsewhere, the crowd thins out and everyone ends up knowing everyone in the field, usually. Losing track of names and faces isn’t something he wants at such a tender age, considering. Still, that surprise’s got nothing but an amiable quality to it, come critique or praise.

Yet he can’t place the guy, so, before pretending gets awkward, “I’m sorry, I haven’t caught your name all night.”

     ❝Really, I’m not surprised, you could say I work in the shadows.❞ Darling winks then, as if to let on he’s joking while actually not at all doing so. But a cover story, was a cover story so he sticks to it. ❝I’m Dr. Casper Darling, suppose I haven’t made much of a name for myself being an expert in the field of paranormal studies. Work at the local university teaching psychics by day.❞ He explains. This wasn’t far from the truth, but he knows he sounds like a joke when he says this. ❝Busy disproving and looking for the truth, but it seems the world of science views me as a clown.❞ A loose shrug then, as he raises his glass back to his lips. He’s curious about the other, however, he slips him out of the train of thoughts how he’d rather be in the lab with some Altered Item instead. Or talking to Dylan over pizza. The kid was bright, he’ll go far, but for tonight he should concentrate on collecting ideas for the FBC. Make the Director proud-- that made him sound like some sort of lap dog, which at any rate-- he might as well be. Dammit.

〚 ❣ 〛The idea had been a long shot, and not something Jesse had wholeheartedly put faith into. But Polaris has always been a guide, a friend, a constant companion that eventually brought her to the FBC, and that ultimately gave her answers she’d spent seventeen years struggling with. Polaris hadn’t led her astray before - so why not listen again? Why not? (Why not?)

“Darling?” she asks incredulously when she sees him, disheveled and alone. She’d only seen the man in videos through shaky projector reels, a veil of distance between them, only knowing him through the impersonal nature of being a voyeur on another’s life with no reciprocation. It almost feels surreal to be here with him now, and for a moment, she doesn’t quite hear his question. Takes a long pause to consider.

‘What will he think of you?’ she asks Polaris, feels a soft pull in her mind that almost makes her smile. ‘You’re right.’ He’d probably love it.

“I had some…help.” It’s all she offers for now, deciding Polaris can come later. From what she’s seen, Darling is a scientist through and through, and a passionate one at that. Her attempts to get him out of here might be interrupted by a slew of questions about Polaris. “And it can help us leave. We have a lot going on outside of this place.” But also, within this place. The FBC is strange.

    ❝You’re the new Director?❞ He avoids answering, feels it’s obvious but still asks. Just as obvious as the answer to her request -- yes, he’ll help. He’ll help the bureau, no matter what. After all that has happened, that might be his only purpose. But he doesn’t anticipate taking a strong position in the FBC anymore... was he still the head of research anyway, or did they move on? They wouldn’t come to find him if they hadn’t right? It had to be safer than before, but that provided little to no comfort. 

    ❝Who’s still alive?❞ He continues, worry burning deep inside of him. Is Emily okay? God, he hopes so... The girl was like a daughter to him. He’d rather she be okay, amongst everybody else. However, seeking him out, seemed to encourage him to think that The Resonance didn’t break out of the Oldest House. Or at least he hopes.

The little round pill goes down without protest, even though Max had left his own beer sitting alone on the coffee table in the other room. Dry swallowing was an easy enough feat, and chewing (whether advisable or not) worked in a pinch. Those pinches where you were afraid you’d end up CHOKING TO DEATH before you could swallow. Those pinches where bad guys had guns and itchy trigger fingers to boot.

He isn’t expecting the other man to make his way inside the small bathroom with him, but when he does Max returns the bottle back to the medicine cabinet in a more nonchalant manner than when he had fished it out; no trace of hesitation, and when he does he makes a point of turning the label away. Probably Darling wouldn’t make anything of it. Max wasn’t as clearly branded by the words “ADDICT” as he sometimes felt like he was.

“Right,” he says, switching gears for another time as he goes for a rag (fresh, still smelling faintly of laundry detergent, unlike most other things in the apartment). Running one corner of it under some water it’s held out toward Darling while the other hand roots around for the Band-Aids in the cabinet.

    Darling couldn’t shake the pure awkwardness of the situation, it bothered him. Unlike his friend, that is --Trench, it wasn’t like he was unused to kind acts, but something about the other man was alarming him. He doesn’t spot the pill bottle being put away, avoiding looking at specifics. Or maybe the doc ignores it after seeing it, doesn’t want to bring it up... Instead, thinking about how he should cover up the pathetic cut on his throat, which was probably only making this even more embarrassing than it needed to be. It’s pretty much done bleeding at this point, just a small slit to inconvenience him. Barely pierced the skin at all, if anything, it was just a prick. 

    He knew that the next day when the Director asks if the Bureau’s golden child got into trouble, he’ll lie that he cut himself while shaving and Zachariah will choose the benefit of the doubt and nod along with him. He won’t bring up coming over to a complete stranger's house, won’t mention almost getting mugged or passing through a hell of an area, knowing his boss would frown upon that. Casper didn’t want another ridiculous argument to erupt, it was easier just playing dumb. The Director would agree. 

    When handed the towel, Casper takes it with his free hand, and presses it onto the wound; winces when it stings but holds it there till the other hands him something to cover it up for good.

Don’t hang up yet, I’m not done--

Tagged by: @minttexan​ Tagging: none / feel free to steal