Whatupang.

Up all night I can’t let go. I really just want to fade like you faded away that early morning. I watched you slip away and all your pain I saw in your eyes for 6 hours and 23 minutes went away too. I prayed all night for us to just both wake up to it being one hell of a bad dream. Until I laid my ear on your chest and couldn’t hear your heartbeat. Why didn’t it seem real to me? So I laid there with you for about another 3 hours until I knew we had to bring you to the vet. My worst fear was you actually leaving the spot u took your last breath. I only let one person touch you...stefy....she carried you to the car. But yet....my mind still was in denile. The whole ride to the vet dreaded it. I didn’t know how I was going to deal with actually leaving you there because that meant it was real. Once they took you away to cremate you I knew I had to actually open my eyes and deal with you being gone. So we pulled up....and inside I went to tell them we made it to it’s you and your lifeless body. For some reason I was angry when I went to sign some papers. They asked if I wanted them to come get you from the car and all’s I remember saying is no please I need to see where your bringing her. So we pulled the car down to a basement. And once again stag carried you which broke my heart even more for her she was so upset and still carried your lifeless body for me. I just remember asking if you were gonna be cold. And I laid on you and just cried and cried. Until I had to go...and I told myself just leave but once I did I stopped dead in my tracks. And lost it. Crying asking everyone who was there why her why me. I said I couldn’t leave but Heather grabbed me and said I got you and it’s all okay but we have to go. And yet I’m still here crying over you. And wishing I could have faded away with you that night. -Ang

I think the hardest part of loosing a dog you love isn’t having to say goodbye...it’s the way your ENTIRE world changes without them and the emptiness that’s left in your heart when they go away. There’s something missing in my home, I feel it day and night, I know it will take time and strength before things feel quite right. But just for now, I need to mourn....my heart...it needs to mend. Though some may say ‘it’s just a pet’ I know in my heart I lost my baby. You’ve brought so much laughter to my life, and richness to my days. With gentle loving ways. Companion, pal and confidante, I will never forget you my baby. I remember the first time I met you...and you immediately laid your head on my chest. And that’s the true definition of true love. I will never forget you my baby. My sweet pookie. I know your in a better place now. I’ll miss you every single day of the rest of my life. Give Grandma D a bunch of kisses for me. I love you so much 💕❤️❤️❤️. Rest easy my sweet beautiful Angelica. #mamalovesyou