show me what you got !

Updated!  Links now included for Comin’ Home With Me Tonight and the new story in 808 SeXXX: Nainoa’s Story. Enjoy!

808 SeXXX - (ongoing new anthology project)

So far this has been the most interesting story title that someone has suggested.  Let me know what you guys think.

Caleb’s Story

Caleb takes us into his first time getting to play with another guy and a very intimate late night encounter in the park. 

part 1   part 2

Danny’s story

Danny’s weekend off turned into an all day sex session with a few of his friends with benefits and you get to come along for the ride.

part 1   part 2   part 3

Keola’s Story

Keola’s had a hard time keeping his interest in his hot coworkers on the DL but he couldn’t have expected his best friend and coworker would be down to have some fun.

part 1   part 2   part 3

Nainoa’s Story

Nainoa accidentally sent a dick pic to his straight friend Kimo but after he calms down, Kimo admits he’s curious when Nainoa tells him he could give him the best blowjob he’s ever had.

part 1

Comin’ Home With Me Tonight - (1 part maybe more?)

When Keoni spots a hot chub named Ikaika in the crowd while playing music at a concert, he decides that like the title of his song, this chub was comin’ home with him tonight…

part 1

The Lockerroom Series - (28 chapters + bonus chapter posted work in progress)

What starts out as a strange dream leads two best friends to discover something special between them. 

The school semester is done and the boys are headed home for the holidays.  What kind of mischief will they be able to get into?  When James, Matt, CJ, and Kevin are feeling frisky, you know they’ll find a way to get in some playtime before going on good behavior back home.

part 1  part 2  part 3  part 4  part 5

part 6  part 7  part 8  part 8.5  part 9

part 10  part 11  part 12  part 13  part 14 

part 15  part 16  part 17  part 18  part 19 

part 20  part 21  part 22  part 23  part 24

part 25  part 26  part 27   part 28

Partnered By Chance - (2 parts done for now)

School projects with random partners usually suck… Unless you’re partnered with a sexy chubby guy who just might have the hots for you too!  Tyson and Jeremy get partnered up and may just have more in common than they would have thought.

part 1  part 2

The Business Trip - (3 parts done for now)

When an out of town hook up falls apart what’s better than a sympathetic friend buying you beer?  A sympathetic friend buying you beer and then giving you some mind blowing head of course.  Grant may not have been what Jason had in mind when he arrived in town for work but things have a strange way of working out.

part 1      part 2     part 3  

They Set Me Up - (one part only)

This one isn’t the first story I wrote but it was the one that really started my creative juices flowing and the stories from being a random “why not?” and into a “hey I can actually do this!” 

Josh’s friend Christy has been trying to get him to break out of his shell but needed help to get him there.  A well thought out plan leads Josh to a night of fun with not just one but two sexy guys.

“Come on, man. Give me a hand.”

I did. Pulled him up and caught a whiff of his stank. It wasn’t stank, really - more like man-smell. Strong man-smell. I couldn’t stop myself from growling. The minute I did I blushed, caught, because he was staring at me. Smirking, really, but with a twinkle in his eyes.

“You gay dudes - I’m tellin’ ya.”

I looked at him with that “I’m like - what?” look. It didn’t work

“Don’t even - I caught that. Here, you want to snort up close?”

And then he lifted up his muscled arm, giving me full access to his pit.

I was speechless, even as my cock got a jolt and my own pits dripped a fresh slurry of sweat.

“Dude, come on. Ya know ya want to.” Then he stuck his nose under his arm and took a long hard whiff. “Fuck - smells good to me, too. Your sister always makes me shower - sometimes twice a day. I miss my own rank.”

It was just us guys on vacation. My sister had been stuck in the city - new-job emergency - and was joining us on the weekend. He’d volunteered to stay at home but she insisted. The flights had already been booked.

He snorted again, then looked at me with those sun-glassed eyes. 

His other hand raised up and grabbed me - gently - by the neck and lowered me into his aura. I grabbed on to his waist, steadying myself. 

“Yeah - you gay guys - you luv this shit, don’t you?”

I nodded. Breathing in, head spinning. This was my fucking brother-in-law. Then his hand caressed my head.

“Oh I know - I’ve always had a few of you dudes taggin’ along.”

I pushed back, looking up, trying to be pissed off or … I don’t know - something. Defensive of my sister’s honor or my community. But he caught the strain of my cock against the board shorts. I wasn’t wearing underwear. My horniness was revealed. Then I followed his stare down and saw his own mound impressively growing. Fuck - I’d seen it before - skinny-dipping, at the gym. But never hard. 

Fuck.

“Don’t be shocked, Stevie. Nothing like some really good head, ya know? And a tight ass? Nothin’ like it.”

I fell back into his stength, this time without his urging. 

“Besides,” he said, whispering in my ear, rough chin caressing my forehead, “Your sister doesn’t swallow.”

“Fuck,” I groaned, this time out loud.

“Yeah. Knew you would. Fucking knew it. Been watching you watch me, stud. You want some of this, don’t ya?”

“Unnnn,” I said, trying to say “no” but not being able. Trying to remain non-committal, but failing. He pushed my head into his pit, asserting his frame on mine, going for it now.

“Problem is - since I got married, I ain’t got time to hunt down a hot throat or tight ass but I been thinking - maybe I don’t got to hunt at all, huh? Maybe all I got to do….” and he trailed off as my hand searched for his crotch, clutching, grabbing.

Then he stepped back a half step - pulled away, while I was clutching his crotch - unbuckled his shorts and pushed them down. His cock swung out - dark and hiary and … fucking big. Really big.

Then he surprised me - his lips pushed into mine, gently at first, then more assertive. It was a male kiss - not some straight-dude-who-didn’t-know-how-to-kiss-a-guy kiss. “I been missing this,” he said, growling, grabbing at my ass, my neck, my pec - all of me.

I let him - my tongue entered his mouth, getting the taste I’d been thinking about for a long damn time, not caring about the violation of norms - of my sister’s marriage. 

“Aw fuck,” I grunted, all in now, tasting him. Feeling him.

He just pushed me down, demonstrating his own urgency and need. 

“You swallow, don’t ya, Stevie?” he said, eyes glazed over, looking at me - pleading almost. I just nodded and then took his cock in my mouth, learning him, nurturing him.

“Aw fuck ya,” he said, loudly, the water below us covering the sounds our coupling. He was in me in seconds - deep soon after - but he gave me the time to learn him so that when I took it to the root, I was ready.

“Fuck I knew you wouldn’t choke like she does,” he grunted, beginning to fuck my throat, gently at first, then more aggressively as he felt me catch my rhythym, adapt to his size and girth. “Fuck I knew you would be good,” he grunted, beginning to saw me now.

He grabbed my head as I clutched his ass, pulling him into me - strength showing strength - men in full. His orgasm was quick, but controlled, a deliberate pouring of himself into my gut, pumping and pumping seed that he seemed to have saved while my sister was - what - on the rag - on the new job? I didn’t know - I didn’t care. This was something I’d lusted after for a time, then tucked away as he had integrated into our family.

Now - here we were. It felt right, not wrong, even though it was wrong and that just made it hotter than fuck.

“Love this so much,” he nearly howled, pushing one more thrust into me while my eyes watered and I snorted like a bull, taking him, full-bodied now, wantonly showing him my lust.

Suddenly I was up on my feet - he’d yanked me up -  blood rushing to my head while I gasped for air, then his mouth was on mine, snaking into me, tasting the remnants of his seed and my snot. 

It was passionate - sweaty, raw. Then he grabbed me, held me, grinding his half-hard cock into my crotch, clutching my ass, gripping my neck and waist.

“You like to get fucked, Stevie,” he whispered to me, grinding, slowing our rhythm, easing my overwhelming desire. 

Taking control.

Not really a question.

“Please,” was all I said, gripping his wet dick, which hardened again in my hands. “Please.”

He held me tight, meaningfully - like a brother can. Then he loosened his grip tenderly, nuzzling my neck, pushing away. His lips brushed mine. I felt his tongue caress my chin. Then he tipped me back. I stumbled. He laughed, stepping out of his shorts and skivvies, which were bundled around his ankles.

“Come on, fucker,” he whooped, sliding down the bank, laughing like a maniac, cock still swinging out in the breeze. “Let’s swim.”

I followed him down, stumbling clumsily, dropping out of my shorts and falling into the cold water behind him. I lunged and he turned, pulling me under the waves, grab-assing my ass and wrestling in the cold ocean.

This happened during a Family Party at a Rec Center. Me and my family arrived at around 7pm, signed in, and looked for our table and sat down. We grabbed pupus (Hawaiian language for Appetizers) and waited for everyone else to arrive. While everyone stay talking story’s with one another, I’m waiting here anxiously for my uncle (who I fantasize about) and his family. Around 7:30ish they arrive and lucky for me their table is right next to us. They come over to say “Hi” before sitting down. When it was my turn to get a “Hi” from my Uncle I get all kiddy inside.

Uncle - gives me a handshake “aye what’s up Sean”

Me - “hey what’s up” shakes back.

His firm handshake along with that smile of his just makes me feel some type of way, and the smell of his cologne just makes me want to take a bite out of him.

-As the night goes on we all start eating and having a few-

After a few beers I know my Uncle was feeling some type of way. Staring at him from across the room, I start to slowly undress him with my eyes, wishing all this would actually happen to us one day. A few minutes passed and I see my Uncle get up from the table with his keys in his hand and left. I’m assuming he’s going to his car. I see my chance and I take it. I got up from the table and followed him.

I see him in his car looking for something, I stand fairly close to his car and lit a cigarette. A few minutes later he leaves his car and starts to head back in when I see this I look up to try and make eye contact with him, to my surprise he looks my way and starts heading over. 

Uncle - “eh I heard you came out to your family, I just wanted to say I’m proud you, that takes a lot of balls”

Me - “thanks uncle, what my dad told you?”

Uncle - “yeah, he seems okay with it which is good”

Me - “yeah I was shocked, I thought he would’ve kicked me out haha”

Uncle - “nah, he loves you. We all do”

Me - smiles “I know, thank you" 

-We talk for a little bit longer until the questions started getting personal-

Uncle - "so what made you the way that you are?”

Me - “I just knew, I mean I had sex with my last girlfriend but it didn’t feel right" 

(At this point the liquid courage is the only reason my we’re having this conversation)

Uncle - "oh I see…….so did you try with a guy?" 

Me - "just fool around that’s all”

Uncle - “oh…..how was it?" 

Me - thinking why does he care? Is he curious?! "felt good, I mean guys do it better to be honest” *laughs*

Uncle - “oh yeah?” With a look on his face, “I wouldn’t know…..”

-We both stand there in silence-

Me - “can tell you something. but promise to keep um between us?”

Uncle - “yeah what….”

Me - “I kind of have this *thing* that I wanted for try………..with……..someone”

Uncle - “with…..who?” He stares at me

Me - “idk…… YOU”

(I no believe what just came out of my mouth, I mean this is gonna get out somehow)

Uncle - “mmmm……What is it?”

Me - is he really asking? “Nothing drastic I promise…….I just wanted to maybe give…you…head" 

-He stares at me in shock-

Uncle - "uhh whoa, you know I get one family right?……and I no go that way Sean" 

Me - "I know I know, I mean no one has to know, it would be our little secret” I sounded so desperate, but I couldn’t help myself, here I stay face to face with my uncle who I find really hot and I really want to see what his dick look and tastes like. I mean he has 5 kids, I’m pretty sure it won’t disappoint. 

My Uncle just stands there like he’s actually gonna consider taking me up on that offer…….after a few seconds he looks at me,

Uncle - “I mean I shoot a good load in a while…..”

Me - *in my head* HOLY SHIT IS HE REALLY GONNA LET ME SUCK HIM OFF?! 

Uncle - “let me give this to your aunty and I come right back”

-he walks back in while I wait to see if he really comes back out. While I’m waiting I’m thinking to myself, of course he won’t you dumbass, I’m his nephew. But FUCK at least I gave it a shot- 

10min past and to my surprise he walks back outside towards me with a beer in his hand, I’m guessing he had to have a few more before doing this, which I no mind.

Uncle - “where we gonna do this?” His breath reeked of alcohol 

Me - “uhm…..” before I could finish he recommends we do um in his car.

-we both agreed, headed to his car, cracked the windows a bit (thank goodness he get tint) and got to business-

We both are in the backseat, he sips on his beer, at this point I’m breathing heavily, just the thought of doing something this bad gives me a rush.

Me - “just relax uncle Jeff”

Uncle - “show me how guys do um”

When he said that I started to get hella horny!

I slowly rubbed his thighs, I leaned in closer to his neck and started giving him a little lick and at the same time letting my warm breath caress his skin. He let out a little moan which tells me he’s getting into it.

Uncle - “shit Sean you turning me on”

Me - whispers “you haven’t felt nothing yet”

Uncle - “holy shit” he moans while I work my hands up his thighs making sure not to touch his growing dick just yet.

I continue to kiss his neck and breath on him, he moans out of satisfaction. I stop rubbing his thighs and I straddled him thinking he would push me off of him, but to my surprise he never. I could feel his throbbing cock through his jeans rubbing against my dick that was also throbbing. At this point I start dry fucking him, and while I was doing that I could judge the size of that piece of meat. 

Me - moans “damn uncle Jeff your dick feels huge”

Uncle - moans “fuck Sean what are we doing?!…..this feels wrong”

Me - “it is wrong, but feel good?”

Uncle - “fuck yeah!" 

Once he said that, I leaned in and placed my lips on his and started to kiss him. His breath was so warm and smelled of alcohol. He was hesitant to kiss me back but he eventually gave in and we started making out. His lips were so soft against mine and his tongue was so juicy, I continue to dry ride him. He starts moaning and breathing heavier, I start to do the same, our thick hard throbbing cocks rubbing against each other through our jeans,

Uncle - "fuck yeah Sean ride your uncle”

I was so turned on when he said that, I could literally feel my pre cum through my jeans

Me - “yeah you like that?!”

–we both are so lost in the moment that we continue this for a few more minutes–

Uncle - “suck me!”

Me - “what?” Is he demanding me to start sucking him off?

Uncle - “i like you suck my dick now”

Me - whispers in his ear “how bad do you want it?”

–I could tell the moment my hot heavy breath graced his ear and down his neck he wanted me to go down on his throbbing dick–

Uncle - “BAD! I like see you choke on your uncle’s fat dick” he replied

–at that point I stopped straddling him and before I knew it I was face to face with his massive dick, the only thing in my way was the zipper on his jeans and his Calvin Klein boxers that were soaked in his own pre cum, I unzip him and reach in–

Me - “damn uncle Jeff you’re soaked!" 

Uncle - "sorry, I pre cu…..” he stopped suddenly 

–before he could finish his sentence, my hand was fully wrapped around his throbbing wet dick which was now exposed through his jeans, I start stroking him slowly using his pre cum as lube–

Uncle - “ahhhh fuck” he moans quietly

Me - “after this uncle Jeff you’ll know why guys do it better”

Uncle - “show me boy, show me why" 

–just like his lips I start making out with the head of his dick kinda teasing him a little and gradually the head of his dick disappeared in my warm filthy wet mouth–

–seeing him squirm and moan out of pleasure turned me on so much that I start rubbing my own dick–

Me - "you good uncle Jeff?”

Uncle - “fuck yeah…..you’re mouth feels so fucking good, you like uncles dick in your mouth yeah?”

Me - “mhm” I replied with his dick head in my mouth

Uncle - moans “yeah suck me, go down lower!”

–I start taking every inch of his shaft into my mouth, each time I would take in more and more of his shaft he would let out a hot deep moan and before I knew it his thick throbbing wet dick was in my mouth–

–before, I could only imagine how my uncles dick looked and tasted like and now I’m literally sucking him off in his own car. He had a fucken nice looking brown Asian dick, not too long and not to short and his girth was perfect enough to fit in my mouth–

Me - “you’re cock is just like how I imagined it would be” as I got up for air

Uncle - “oh yeah?….you like uncles dick huh!”

Me - moans “fuck yeah!”

Uncle - “yeah, keep sucking me Sean until I CUM!”

–from there my sucking got intense and so did his breathing, I deep throated him–

Uncle - “HOLY SHIT!” he moans “fuck yeah keep doing that!”

–both dripping in sweat I continue to suck his dick alternating between deep throating and casual sucking, each time I did this I can tell my uncle was just moments away from releasing his thick warm load into my mouth–

Uncle - “fuck yeah Sean suck me, uhhhh yeah suck uncles dick!" 

–he starts thrusting his hips causing his dick to go deeper and deeper into my throat that I start to gag out of pleasure–

–his moans became more intense and so did his breathing, I knew right then and there he was close to shooting–

Uncle - "fuck Sean I’m close”

Me - “yeah”

Uncle - “where you like me shoot?!” he whimpered 

Me - “in my mouth” I moaned

Uncle - “you sure?”

Me - “fuck yeah I wanna taste you!” as I shoved his dick back into my filthy mouth

Uncle - “okay…..yeah you want it?…..you want it?…..” as he continues to thrust

–the sound of his dick puncturing the inside of my hot wet mouth fills the car, you can literally hear my saliva whooshing around his fully erect dick–

–I place my hands on his hips to make him stop thrusting so that I can have the satisfaction and control of finishing him off–

Uncle - “uh yeah…..Uh Yeah…..UH YEAH” he moaned every time the back of my throat came in contact with the head of his dick

–I slowly start to feel him tense up, he puts one hand on my shoulder and the other above his head, I can feel his grip getting tighter and tighter on my shoulder–

Uncle - “I’m gonna……uh…..uh…..I’m gonna……cum” he moans while I continue to swallow every inch of his dick

Me - “cum for me uncle Jeff!”

Uncle - let’s out a series of moans that got louder and louder, leading up to his big finish “uhh…uhh…Uhh….UHHHHHHHH!" 

–just like a bullet fired from a gun, his warm cum hit the back of my throat and started to slowly fill the inside of my mouth–

Uncle - "UHHHHHHH FUUUUUCK……UHH…..UHH….UHH” he moans while I still milk his dick

–I keep sucking him to the point where each time I go down the feeling becomes more and more sensitive that he can no longer handle my mouth being around his dick any longer–

–I slowly retreat my mouth away from his dick making sure I get every last drop of his cum before swallowing–

Uncle - exhales deeply “DAMN…….that was intense” as he sat there gasping for breath

Me - “damn is right” as I wipe away the remaining spit off my mouth 

–he puts away his once hard throbbing dick back into his pants, and we both get cleaned up–

Me - “how was it?”

Uncle - still gasping for breath “I must say, that was pretty fucken hot!”

Me - laughs “better than a women?”

Uncle - “honestly yeah!” He replied hesitantly 

–I think he was embarrassed and ashamed to admit the fact that getting serviced by a guy, yet alone his nephew, was a better experience than with any woman he’s been with–

Me - “I think we should head back, aunty must be wondering where you stay”

Uncle - he grinned “that’s the least of her worries now…." 

–we both stared at each other and laughed, and then carried on like nothing even happened–

It’s been a week since my Second Sexual Encounter with my cousin Jesse. I’ve been anxiously waiting for this day to come, what made me even more impatient was his voice replaying in my head saying ~ “you better be there” ~ what also turned me on was how his face looked when he winked at me! Oh I was fucken ready for this!

~we finally arrive at the beach~

We quickly greeted everyone including Jesses sister and apologized for being late. Everyone was pretty much eating or close to being done. My other cousins were either down at the beach or playing football.

As I’m scoping out my cousins trying to locate Jesse, I finally spotted him getting out of the water all soaked and wet.

As he got closer to the tent, I couldn’t help but focus my attention on his smooth tight body dripping wet.

Jesse: “sup Ryan! you made it!” He said to me as he catches his breath.

Me: “yup, how’s the water?”

Jesse: “felt good, just took a quick dip”

Me: “oh I see”

We both stood there in awkward silence for a while before he turned to me and gave me the look. The Look which meant now that I’m here we can get to doing what we planned on getting into.

Jesse: “so…..are you gonna jump in the water?” He asked.

Me: “um idk, maybe not…..why?”

Jesse: looks around to make sure no one was listening in on our conversation “follow me” he whispered.

Me: “okay” I said as I followed him 5 mins after he left.

He began to head towards the bathrooms at the far end of the park. As we’re making our way there he kept on looking around making sure no one was watching.

I can slowly start to feel my adrenaline pumping through my body, my hands and feet start to get sweaty. My body was then over powered by an intense  warm feeling that caused me to sweat a little bit.

As we both discreetly entered the bathrooms without being noticed, Jesse took one last look around and made his way to one of the bigger stalls where no one will notice there’s two guys inside.

We both enter the stall, he closes the door and locks it. Finally the moment I’ve been waiting for is about to happen….again.

~we positioned ourselves towards the back of the stall~

Me: “you wanna do it here?” I asked.

Jesse: laughs quietly “yah, why not”

Me: shrugs my shoulders “idk, what if someone walks in?”

Jesse: “that’s why we’ll be quiet” he said.

Me: “I guess……so what do you wanna do?” I asked eagerly.

Jesse: “idk….” he replied quietly under his breath.

He then gravitates his hands towards his crotch and begins rubbing himself. I can slowly start to do the same. I could then notice his bulge growing bigger and bigger, his dick was about to almost puncture a hole though his swim shorts.

Jesse: moaning softly “uhhhh my dick is so fucken hard cuz!”

Me: “yeah….stroke that shit!” I whispered.

Jesse: “you wanna suck this dick again huh?!” He said with a cocky look on his face.

Me: nods “fuck yeah!” I moaned deeply while stroking the imprint of my dick.

Jesse: “take out your dick!” He demanded while biting and licking his lips.

Me: “only if you take out yours!”

~we both then undid our swim shorts exposing our hard throbbing dicks~

Jesse: “Uh Fuck yeah cuz!” He moaned while stroking his dick.

Me: “Fuck Jesse your dick is fucken hard” I moaned.

Jesse: "fuck yeah cuz!” He groaned before leaning in towards my face and began to kiss me vigorously.

As we’re getting more into the kiss, so did our stroking. The stall was then filled with the sounds of our lips and tongue spit swapping each other, along with the sounds of our hot heavy breathing.

The taste of his spit coating the inside of my mouth turned me on so fucken much, and the feeling of both of our rock hard dicks rubbing up against each other felt amazing.

~we stopped kissing and stroking~

Me: “fuck that was hot!” I said, referring to our make out session.

Jesse: “fuck yeah!” He moaned heavily.

Me: “now what?” I asked.

Jesse: “let me suck you off first cuz!” He insisted.

Me: shocked by his response “okay…..”

Before I could get a response from Jesse he already had pulled down my shorts, kneeled down in front of me and began sucking my dick.

My eyes start to shut tightly as I tilted my head back, the feeling of my dick being swallowed by his warm wet mouth felt fucken good! He started gagging when the tip of my dick slammed to the back of his throat.

Me: “UH FUCK YAH!” I moaned deeply, making sure not to be too loud.

Jesse: gets up for air “you like that cuz?!” He groaned deeply while stroking my dick.

Me: “FUCK YAH!” I moaned.

I then focus my attention down towards him as he continued to suck me off. Watching my dick disappear into his face was something I could watch all day and night, I even noticed that his dick was still rock solid which made me even more turned on.

He continued to suck me off for a few more minutes until he had his fill. He stood up in front of me while still stroking my spit soaked dick.

Jesse: “my turn!” He said smiling.

Me: moaning heavily “Fuck yeah Jesse!” I replied while pulling down his shorts.

Jesse: “FUCK!” He moaned heavily.

Jesse then backed himself up and leaned his back against the wall. I then kneeled myself in front of his thick hard dick and began to tease him a little.

As I’m teasing him, I begin to give in to my fetishes indulged myself with the taste and scent of his body. I start off by sniffing and licking his balls that were so musky and tasted like sweat and ocean water. As I’m doing this I notice Jesse start to tense up and clench his eyes even tighter as I took in his whole sack into my mouth, playing with each of his balls with my tongue.

I then worked my nose up towards his dark, curly pubes sniffing that musky odor of dick sweat and oils from his body. I’m so horny and turned on that my dick stayed rock hard the whole time.

Jesse: “Ryan!” He moaned deeply “can you stop fucken teasing me and suck me already?!” He demanded.

Me: looks up at him and grins “Fuck You!” I  responded jokingly.

Jesse: “punk!” He said with a slight giggle.

Thinking he’s had enough, I decided to relive him from this sexual torture and give him what he wanted. I firmly gripped his shaft with my right hand while stroking myself with the other.

As I’m about to indulge myself in his long hard dick, I was stopped dead in my tracks by the sound of someone entering the bathroom and going into the one of the stalls next to ours.

We both stopped, and stared at each other with that nervous look on our faces hoping we don’t get caught.

Jesse: “what the fuck are we gonna do?” He whispered.

Me: “Shh….just wait until he leave, hopefully he no take long.” I whispered back.

Only a few minutes passed by, which to us felt like forever. Here we were in a Musky dirty stall waiting for this cock blocker to finish doing his shit before we could finish ours.

As Jesse took a seat on the toilet as we waited, I decided to take a peek over the next stall to make sure he wasn’t someone we know.

As I looked over above his stall, I noticed that this guy was pretty good-looking. What also caught my attention was the size of his dick, which was soft, and his body wasn’t bad either.

As I’m glancing down at him, I start to get horny again, and Jesse knew it too in fact his dick went from soft to fully erected in seconds.

~I worked my way back to where Jesse was as quietly as possible~

Jesse: “what are you gonna do?” He whispered.

Me: “suck that fucken dick of course!” I said in a soft voice.

I slowly positioned myself and my mouth around Jesse’s dick and began sucking him slowly, swallowing him inch by inch making him not able to hold in his moans and groans.

At this point we’re both starting to breath heavily and loudly, the sounds of me sucking his dick gradually became louder and sloppier. There were times where he would have to grip my head tightly just to warn me about the noise.

Jesse: moaning softly “uhh fuck yeah cuz! suck my fucken dick”

As Jesse became more and more close to cumming I decided to hold off from sucking him for a bit and have him get a go at my dick again.

As I’m getting up, I noticed that Jesse was suddenly struck with a surprised and a scared look on his face.

Me: “what’s up?” I said softly.

Without saying a word I followed Jesses eyes to where he was staring at, I was then too struck by the same look he got.

To our surprise the guy that was in the stall next to us was now peeking over and staring at me and Jesse, while I was sucking his dick.

Me: “oh shit!” I blurted out.

Jesse: “dude please don’t say anything!” He nervously asked him.

Me: “how long you was staring at us?” I asked.

Guy: “long enough for me to catch a boner!” He answered.

By the looks of it he kinda looked like he was jerking himself off as I was sucking Jesse, and to be honest I found that kind of hot.

~there was a brief moment of silence before the guy asked us a shocking question~

Guy: “so….i can join the fun?” He asked nervously. “I promise, nothing major, maybe just oral”.

Me and Jesse stared at each other with a surprised yet confusing look on our faces, was he actually offering to suck us both off?.

Me: “wait…..so you just wanna suck me and my cousin off?!” I asked.

Guy: “whoah! Wait he’s your cousin?!…..” he paused.

Me: “yeah…..” I replied shamefully. Jesse had a shame look on his face too.

Guy: “…….that’s……honestly kinda hot” he replied.

Jesse: “really?!”

The guy nods his head yes and then makes his way in the stall with me and Jesse.

As he entered the stall, his dick was already sticking out of his swim shorts leaking with precum.

The three of us stood there in awkward silence for a bit, until I decided to break the ice by stroking Jesse off, Jesse then reached down and started to stroke me off.

The guy stares at the both of us and starts to jerk himself off as well. His dick was pretty big and by the looks of it Jesse  was fascinated by it too.

Guy: “fuck yeah that’s hot!” He moaned “stroke those dicks!”.

I was totally getting turned on by the whole encounter, but what got me the most worked up was that Jesse was actually into it as well, I mean it was hard enough for me to get with him.

But whatever, it’s happening and this guy is willing to suck us both without anything in return. We were both so thrown off by his offer that we didn’t even bother asking him his name, it was obvious that he’s a local,  Hawaiian Filipino mix.

As me and Jesse are jerking each other off, we started to breath heavily which then led us to full on making out. By the looks of it our buddy was enjoying it to, jerking his thick 7 inch dick.

Guy: “fuck yeah you guys are fucken hot!” He moaned as he bit his lips.

Me and Jesse continued our make out sesh, each stroke of our lips against each other made us moan and whimper in lust.

At this point my dick and Jesses were hard and so ready for cumming, but before that I decided to give some attention to our buddy who I then pulled over to us and included him in our make out session.

As the three of us were lip locking and tongue swapping, I could feel Jesses hand grip the left side of my butt cheek. I looked up into his eyes and without exchanging words I basically told him that he can’t fuck me at the moment.

As disappointing as that felt, he knew that my ass is not going anywhere, I just wanted the both of us to indulge in this unexpected addition to our plans.

~the three of us continued to kiss before our buddy went down on us~

He pulled away from me and Jesses faces, and aggressively pushed us up against the wall, he was so horny and ready to take it all.

Guy: “fuck you guys’ dicks are fucken hard!” He said as he stroked each one in his hands.

Jesse: “fuck yeah!” He moaned as he placed his arm over my shoulder.

The both of us were so heated that our skin was quickly drenched in sweat, and our breaths caressed our faces with warmth.

This was it, me and Jesses dicks we’re about to be devoured by this horny stalkers mouth, he gripped our dicks firmly and then began to tease us with his juicy lips and warm breath.

We both braced ourselves for the soon to come overwhelming feeling of sensitivity that it almost made us weak in the knees.

Never more ready, we then started to feel our dicks against each other as it entered his slutty juicy mouth.

Me & Jesse: “Uhhhhh fuck yeah!” We moaned.

Me: “you like that Jesse?!” I asked.

Jesse: “uh UH!” He groaned, holding back his loud moaning.

This guys’ mouth was working marvelously on our dicks. Each time he pushed down, shoving us deeper into his throat, our dicks would rub up against each other giving us an over powering sensation that we could not hold back.

The stall was then filled with the sounds of me and Jesses moaning plus our buddy’s slobbering mouth. We were both so close to cumming, it’s a good thing he stopped sucking us both together.

He then proceeded to suck us individually, starting with me. As I was getting sucked, Jesse took part and began kissing my neck, and played with my hard tan nipples.

Me: “OH FUCK YOU GUYS!” I groaned in pleasure.

I could literally feel my eyes roll all the way back of my head, and I began to tense up and shake a little. My dick was so close to erupting that my moaning turned silent and my eyes clenched tightly making me close to losing myself.

Guy: “your dick tastes so fucken good man!” He says as he jerks and sucks my dick.

Me: “yeah?!…..why don’t you give my cousin a taste!” I demanded.

As he slowly stopped sucking my dick he gave me a stare that looked so evil, but it felt so right.

He then positions his mouth above Jesses still rock solid, teasing him for a moment before taking it in all the way.

Jesse letted out a moan so intense that it made the stall doors shake. By the looks of it This guy could probably make Jesse cum quicker than me.

Me: “yeah….fucken gag on that huge dick!” I said.

Jesse: “yeah you bitch! Choke on my shit!” He moaned.

As Jesse was getting sucked, I decided to return the favor and massage Jesses sweaty muscular body, and pinch and nibble on his brown nipples.

This encounter escalated so quickly that we didn’t even pay attention to how loud we were getting. The sounds of our moans vibrated through my skin, making me moan without any sexual contact.

~our buddy continued to suck us off, alternating between our dicks~

He kneeled down comfortably before vigorously jerking our dicks waiting for our dicks to explode.

Me: “OH FUCK CUZ IM CLOSE” i moaned.

Jesse: “YEAH FUCK ME TOO CUZ”

Guy: “FUCK YEAH, LET ME TASTE YOUR FUCKEN LOAD” he demanded.

I turned to Jesse and locked his lips with mine, exchanging one last intense kiss.

Jesse: pulls back from my lips “uhhh fuck yeah I’m gonna CUM!” hearing this, the guy quickly shoved jesses throbbing dick in his mouth, deep throating every inch. “oh FUCK I’m CUMMING!….UHHHHH…UHHHHH…!” he yelled with each warm shot filling his hungry mouth.

Watching my cousin shoot load after load down this strangers throat is so fucken hot that i can’t hold it any longer.

Me: “oh FUCK yeah I’m about to CUM!!”

Jesse: pulls his dick out of our buddys mouth “SWALLOW his fucking load!” he demanded shoving his head onto my cock.

Me: “OH FUCK…UHHHH…YEAH….FUUUUUUCK!” i moaned in ecstasy.

Before we knew it his mouth was filled with our warm thick salty jizz, he then proceeded to play with our cum in his mouth before gulping it down his throat.

Our buddy quickly departed from us after doing the deed, not even a single goodbye or hand wave came from him as he got dressed and exited the stall.

Me and Jesse were so exhausted to even care, we stayed back in the stall breathing heavily trying to regain our strength.

Me: “how was that Jesse?” I asked.

Jesse: “idk, it happened so fast that I didn’t even have time to process what was going on!” He responded.

 We both stared at each other with a grin as we got dressed. We then proceeded out of the stall and out off the bathroom, luckily our family wasn’t paying attention and didn’t even notice us gone until we showed up again.

 In the end me and Jesse both had another successful sexual encounter, with a touch of something or shall I say someone to assist us. Anyways just like our other encounters we ended it like nothing ever happened, as we both headed towards the ocean for a quick dip we continued living our lives with our inner demon still hungry for more.

Cousin Bonding Pt. 1

           I lost my virginity on a stormy night in early autumn. It was near the middle of my first semester at Calhoun University and I can honestly say the timing was right. There was a combination of reasons why I hadn’t had sex before age nineteen but the prominent reason was timing. I had quite a few opportunities in high school but the timing was never right or I missed signs that I didn’t know at the time were signs. I literally met the guy I would lose my virginity to at freshman orientation.

           He walked up to me and said, “You’re the only black dude here who hasn’t given me weird looks.”

           I smiled and introduced myself and we ended up doing the rest of orientation together. His name was Jabari Davis and he was funny and cute and just cool to be around. When I learned we would be staying on the same floor of the same dorm hall, I got a little geeked but I put up a front and was blasé about it. After orientation when I was back home, he sent me a friend request on Facebook and that was the beginning of it all. That led to us exchanging numbers and texting and talking all the time all the way until move-in day. He gave me a hug in front of my family on move-in day and had my overprotective brothers ready to jump him!

           So, we’re deep into our first semester and we’re like new best friends doing everything together. We were literally scheduling our daily routines around our friendship and I didn’t even notice it at the time. I felt as though we were becoming more than friends but I wasn’t sure if Jabari was feeling that way for a while. It wasn’t until he began being blatantly affectionate that I knew for sure he was into other guys. I’d had gay friendly straight friends before and even some who were touchy-feely type guys, but he was different. No matter where we were, this boy would put an arm around me or hug me. Anytime I ran into a guy I knew from a class or a guy I’d become friends with on-campus and Jabari was around, he’d either get jealous or he’d keep asking me how I felt about the guy.

           The biggest confirmation came the night we actually had sex. There was a thunderstorm wreaking havoc that night and most of us were in our dorm rooms studying because midterms were like less than two weeks away. My roommate Gavin was busy on his laptop with his headphones plugged in listening to loud rock music and I was taking a break from studying and being silly as usual, taking selfies and texting friends.

                                           Me (Brayden Campbell)

           So, I get this notification saying Jabari had just posted a video to his Facebook wall. The caption said he’d just got back from the gym and the video was him in the bathroom shirtless. Naturally, my hormones took over and I liked the video without any hesitation. I watched it quite a few times and got turned on more and more each time I watched it. He licked his lips in the video the same way he always did whenever we were talking face to face. His body looked sexy as usual and I noticed his dick print as I always did whenever he wore gym shorts or sweatpants or pajama bottoms.

                                                Jabari Davis

           Not long after I liked the video, he sent me a text asking me what I was up to. I sent him one of my selfies and replied that I was just having fun and waiting out the storm. Immediately, he sent me another text telling me to come to his room. I did have a feeling something was different that night but I wasn’t nervous at all at that point. I slid on my slippers, grabbed my keys, and left my room and headed up the hall to his. He had the door propped open so I just went in.

           My first anniversary with Dezmond arrived and I was happy about it. When I met Dezmond Holloway through a mutual friend, I didn’t really like him like that. Our first date didn’t go well, but I decided to give him another chance and I’ll never regret it. He made me smile and laugh harder than I’d smiled or laughed in years. I fell for him quicker than I thought I would. We moved in together after only three months of dating. Our connection was crazy at times. It was like he was my other half. Yet, the deeper in love with him I fell, the guiltier I felt inside.

           The source of my guilt was someone who took everything from me. Just thinking about him was enough to ruin an entire day for me. His name was Omari Parker and he was my everything before I met Dezmond. Omari and I had known each other since middle school but didn’t realize we were attracted to each other until eleventh grade. Our mismatched friendship turned into a surprisingly solid relationship. I’d been aware of his bipolar disorder since we were in sixth grade, but I didn’t learn the depths of his struggle with the disorder until we began college. He’d been balanced up until that point and there really weren’t too many warning signs that something had gone terribly wrong. On most days, I wouldn’t even think about what happened. And then there were other days where it was all I could think about. The day of my first anniversary with Dezmond unexpectedly turned into one of those days.

           “Who’s Omari?” Dezmond asked me while I was taking our clothes out of the dryer in our building’s laundry center.

           I immediately froze up and looked at him before asking, “Where did you hear that name?”

           “From you. Yesterday you were on the phone with Cassandra and…”

           “You eavesdropped on my conversation? Wow Dez, I can’t believe you’d do that.”

           “It was an accident, Chad.”

           “Yeah, right.” I shook my head and went back to taking our clothes out of the dryer. “What all did you hear?”

           “You told her that you had a dream about Omari and that he was trying to tell you something but no sound was coming from his mouth. Is he an ex?”

           “I don’t think I’m ready for this conversation.”

           “Baby…”

           “No, Dez. Now help me fold these clothes.”

           He climbed down off of the washing machine he’d been sitting on and told me, “You know you can talk to me about anything. We’re a verse couple which means we get along better than most gay couples.” He laughed and I smirked at what he said.

           “All I want to talk to you about today is our plans for our anniversary.”

           “I’m down for whatever you’re down for, baby.” He kissed my cheek and then began to help me fold our clothes. “Mmm, these smell fresh.”

           “I know, right? It’s a miracle I could get the funk out of your clothes.”

           “Excuse you?” He laughed and started tickling me.

           As much as I loved Dezmond, I wasn’t ready to talk to him about Omari. I first needed to get to a place where I could discuss what happened without crying or having a complete meltdown. I knew all Dezmond wanted to do was comfort me and get me through whatever problem I had, but I just couldn’t push myself to tell him everything. How could I tell him that I’d been battling depression off and on the entire time he and I have been together? How could I tell him that I was still in love with my first love? Would he understand the reason why I will only sleep on the left side of our bed or why I keep the promise ring Omari gave me in twelfth grade on my finger? It all seemed like too much to explain to him so I pushed it off yet again.

           “You’re tired?” he asked me as I climbed into our bed and lied down. “I thought we were gonna spend the day doing fun stuff.”

                                       Me (Chadwick Fulton)

           “I just need a nap,” I told him. “You woke me up kinda early.”

           “Yeah because I made you breakfast in bed.” He sat down on his side of the bed and looked at me.

           “Why are you looking at me like that?”

           “Because I love you. And I love you so much that I can tell when something is wrong.”

           “Nothing is wrong, Dezmond. It’s our first anniversary and I’m happy.”

           “Chadwick Nathaniel Fulton, I cannot be fooled. You were happy until I asked you who this Omari person was.”

           “Dez, just drop it. Please.”

           “No. You know everything about me and I feel like I only know your full name.” He laughed a little. “Do you know how hard it was for me to tell you my parents kicked me out of the house at age fifteen and I was homeless for a long time? I’m still ashamed of that to this day, baby.”

           “I know but there’s some things that aren’t easy to talk about. Not even with the person you love.”

           “So we can get matching tattoos but we can’t talk about stuff that happened to us? Baby, you never know how much we can help each other just by talking. And on today of all days, we should want to be open with each other.” He paused and waited for me to say something. When I didn’t, he continued, “How about this, you tell me who Omari is and I’ll tell you the real reason why my parents kicked me out of the house.”

           “What are you talking about? You told me they threw you out because you’re gay.”

           “They learned that I’m gay from an uncle who saw me leaving a gay club when I was nineteen. They threw me out at fifteen for a totally different reason.”

           “You lied to me?”

           “You’re keeping the truth about this Omari person from me.”

           I sighed and admitted, “Okay, you have a point.”

           “So you’re going to tell me?”

           “If I can manage to get through it.” I already felt myself getting choked up as I sat up against the headboard. “This isn’t easy for me, baby.”

           “I’m here for you.” He grabbed my hand. “Take your time.”

           I took a deep breath before telling him, “Omari Parker was my first boyfriend. He was my first love. We’d been friends since middle school but when we got to high school, things changed. We finally became serious in the eleventh grade and it was like sparks flying. It was beautiful and so right on time. And I didn’t even…” I stopped as tears filled my eyes. “I knew I wouldn’t be able to do this.”

                                          Dezmond Holloway

           “Baby, it’s okay. Look at me. Look into my eyes, Chad.” I looked into his comforting hazel eyes. “I am here to help you. You have to believe in me the way I believe in you. Trust me, I can help.”

           “Okay.” I wiped my eyes and calmed down. “After high school, we both enrolled into the same college. At first, everything was fine. It wasn’t until our second semester there that things just started to go wrong. He started having trouble managing his bipolar symptoms. I thought he was off his meds but he was taking them. They just stopped working the way they used to. I wanted to get him help but he kept insisting that I let him work his way through it. He’d have these moments of clarity where he was one hundred percent the man that I knew. And then there were…other moments.”

           “How bad did it get?”

           “I once came to his dorm and found him sitting in a tub full of water with all of his clothes on. He’d hooked the toaster up in the bathroom and…I don’t even wanna think about what he would’ve done had I not shown up in that moment. After that, I knew what I had to do. I went to a counselor at the student health center and they had to have Omari committed to a mental health facility out of town.”

           “That must’ve been hard.”

           “It was the toughest thing I had to witness in my life. He was so angry at me. His parents thanked me though.”

           “So, what happened after he was committed?”

           “They were able to balance him out again but something just wasn’t right. The light in his eyes wasn’t there anymore. He just wasn’t the same and I could feel it. The meds they had him on kept him from having mood swings and they completely stopped the erratic behavior, but he was depressed. He was so depressed and I could feel him slipping away from me. No matter how hard I loved him or how many things we did together, he just wasn’t himself anymore.”

           “Chadwick, what happened to him?”

           “We were back home in Maryland for summer break and all of a sudden, he wanted to spend time with me. He still wasn’t himself but we made love a lot of times and cuddled. He kept telling me that everything was going to be alright. One night, he came over while my parents were out and we just cuddled in my bed for hours. We made plans to go to the movies the next day and then he left. That was the last time I saw him alive.” I got choked up again and had to grab my stomach because it felt like I was going to throw up. I was reliving every moment and it hurt.

           “He’s dead? Oh baby, I’m so sorry.”

           “He went home that night and took almost all of the pills in his parents’ bathroom. I don’t know what made him do it. I mean, I know the disorder played a role but I just felt so useless. I still feel that way. I couldn’t help him and he was my everything, Dez. He was my everything.” I cried and Dezmond wrapped his arms around me.

           “I’m so sorry, Chad. No one should have to go through something that heartbreaking.”

           I pulled away from him and told him, “I’ve been working on getting over Omari and what happened but it’s so hard. I love you, Dezmond. You know how I feel about you. But I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to truly move on.”

           “I may be able to help you move on.”

           When he said that, I looked at him and asked, “How?”

           “Do you remember what I said about the real reason why my parents kicked me out?”

           “Yeah.”

           “They kicked me out because…I’m not like most people, Chad. There’s something about me that I’ve learned to keep secret from people unless I know that I can trust them.” He took a deep breath before revealing, “I can talk to dead people.”

           I sat there silently looking at him before bursting out in laughter. “Okay, if that’s your way of getting me to stop talking about Omari, then it worked.” I wiped my eyes and laughed again.

           “I’m serious, Chad. If I pick something up that belonged to someone or has meaning to someone who is now dead, I can hear them. I can’t hear everything and I can’t see them, but I can hear them. When I was really young, I thought I was hearing imaginary people or that it was make-believe but as I got older, I realized my gift. It scared the hell out of me but I’ve been able to help a lot of people and this gift has made my life worthwhile.”

           “Dezmond, you’re scaring me.”

           “I know and I’m sorry about that but I need you to believe me. My parents did not throw me out because I’m gay. They were very religious but it wasn’t because I’m gay. They thought I had a demon in me because every time I picked up my late grandma’s cane in the living room, she spoke to me. And I’d tell them what she was saying and they’d call the pastor over. They didn’t believe me and eventually they made me leave their house.”

           “Why are you just now telling me this? We’ve been together for a year now.”

           “I was going to wait until I felt like the time was right but now I see the right time is now.” He looked around. “Is there anything in this room or this apartment that belonged to him? A jacket or a wallet? Anything?”

           “No, his parents got all of his stuff back in Maryland. Dezmond, this is crazy.”

           “I know how it sounds, but I can prove it to you. I just need one thing he cared about. Did he give you something meaningful?”

           “I don’t know. Maybe…” I lifted my left hand and that’s when I remembered the promise ring. “This. He gave me this promise ring back in high school.”

           “Can I hold it?”

           “I’m not sure if I want to do this.”

           “If it gets too weird or if you can’t handle it, then I’ll stop.”

           I thought about it for a little while before slowly removing the ring from my finger and placing it in Dezmond’s hands. The moment I placed it in his hands, his eyes lit up and he let out a long-winded gasp. He stood up and walked around in a small circle for a few minutes and then stopped. I stood up because I wasn’t sure if he was about to leave the room or stay. Out of nowhere, I felt a very cool breeze flow through the room.

           “He’s here,” he told me. “He’s in this bedroom with us right now.”

           I wasn’t sure if I believed in what he was doing, but I did have a strange feeling. It was making the hairs stand up on the back of my neck. “Can he hear me?”

           “Yes, he can hear and see you.” He paused for a short while before saying, “He keeps saying bed. I don’t know what he’s trying to tell me.” He closed his eyes. “He’s saying bed and side.”

           “My side of the bed? He used to always sleep on the right side and I slept on the left whenever we spent the night together. Can I ask him something?”

           “Yeah, go ahead.”

           “Omari, if you’re really here then tell me…well tell Dezmond what you were wearing the last time I saw you at my house back in Maryland. I remember every single detail about you that day. What were you wearing, baby?”

           Dezmond closed his eyes and quietly replied, “He says he was wearing a wife beater, khaki shorts and a white Run–D.M.C. cap. He’s saying he wore the cap because he didn’t have a haircut.”

                                             Omari Parker

           When Dezmond relayed that message for Omari, I realized that this was real and he indeed was speaking to my dead lover. Omari was supposed to get a haircut the next day before our date to the movies, so he wore that Run-D.M.C. cap that day. And he was wearing a wife beater and khaki shorts. As if I’d been punched in the gut, I grabbed my stomach and sat down because my knees got weak. My fear subsided but I still didn’t know how to feel about this whole thing. I wasn’t sure I could handle what Omari had to say.

           “He’s saying party,” Dezmond continued. “I think he’s saying warming party.”

           “Housewarming party?” I asked.

           “Yes, housewarming party. He’s saying housewarming party and I can’t make out the other word. Might or mate, I think.”

           My eyes lit up and I asked, “The housewarming party? Cassandra’s housewarming party? Dezmond, that’s where you and I met. He knows about that?”

           “He says he was jealous. Okay, now he’s saying doctor piper. No, pepper. Dr. Pepper, the soda.”

           It took me a little while to remember me and Dezmond’s first date. “Oh my God, it was him. Dez, remember our first date at Chili’s? Your glass of Dr. Pepper turned over on me. He did that?”

           “He says he’s sorry. He was jealous. He knew because of housewarming party.”

           “He knew what?”

           “Mate.”

           “Mate? Like soulmate?”

           “Yes.”

           “Is he saying he knew before you and I met that we’d be together?”

           “Yes. He’s saying sorry again.”

           “I forgive you, Omari. I understand why you were jealous. You didn’t even like it when I made new male friends.”

           “No, he’s saying sorry for something different.” He froze and his eyes widened. “Pills.”

           That’s when I finally felt like I could take it. I had to know why he did what he did. I had to know if he knew how bad it would make me feel, and that he left me. I approached Dezmond and touched his hand and to my surprise, tears filled his eyes. “What’s wrong?”

           “I can hear him more clearly now. Chad, I’ve never been able to hear a spirit speak like this.” He paused for a second. “He wants you to know that he couldn’t go on any more like that. He was in a lot of pain.”

           “I could’ve helped you, Omari. You know how much I loved you.”

           “He says that the disease won. He was hearing voices.”

           “Oh my God.” Tears rolled down my face and I quickly wiped them. “There were counselors that could’ve helped.”

           “He’s saying no. It was too severe.”

           “They could’ve helped him! He’d been suicidal before and they helped him!”

           “He’s saying he wasn’t just suicidal by that point. He was hearing voices telling him to kill you. And even though he couldn’t stop the voices, he says he knew that he could never hurt you and the thought of possibly hurting you…it made him want to end it all.”

           I sobbed and asked, “Why did he make plans with me to go to the movies then? I don’t understand. Why did he do it?”

           “He says you knew him best and if he didn’t tell you he’d see you the next day, you would’ve known something was wrong. He didn’t want to hurt you.”

           “Well, he did hurt me! You hurt me, Omari!”

           “You have to understand.”

           “What?”

           “He’s saying you have to understand. He wasn’t himself anymore. The only thing keeping him on this earth was you and your love. Once his mind began telling him to harm you, he says it had to end.” He paused for a short while before saying, “He wants you to know that…”

           “What? He wants me to know what?”

           “His voice is fading. I’m starting to hear him less.” He waited for a few seconds. “He’s saying you asked him something when you were alone in the church after his funeral. The answer is: always and forever.” He exhaled and told me, “He’s gone.” He placed the ring back in my hand. “Baby, what did you ask him in the church?”

           Choked up, I wiped my eyes and replied, “I asked him if he still loved me. I used to ask him that after we had an argument and he’d give me the same answer, always and forever. Dezmond, thank you.”

           I broke down and Dezmond held me. I’d never experienced something that surreal before in my life. A part of me was still upset with Omari but as I thought about the things he’d said through Dezmond, I realized just how bad his mental state had gotten. He really was in pain and there was nothing I could do to help him. There was nothing his family could do besides institutionalize him and there’s no way he would’ve been okay with that. Still, I was grateful of Dezmond and his ability. Many people lose love ones and never get real closure.

           “Are you mad at me for still loving him?” I asked Dezmond later that night as we prepared for a dinner party with our friends to celebrate our anniversary.

           “No, of course not,” he answered. “I understand that you two had something special and I would never want you to deny that.”

           “He sort of gave us his blessing.”

           “Yeah, he did.”

           “So, what happens to him now? Will he ever communicate through you again?”

           “Only if you want him to. For now, he’s in a different world. He’ll only come around if you strongly yearn for him.”

           “And how will I know he’s here?”

           “Unless you let me hold the ring when he’s here, you won’t know. But baby, that’s not the important thing. The important thing is that he’ll always be with you in one way or another. And he wants you to be happy. Do I make you happy?”

           “You know you do.”

           “The only way you can satisfy him is by living. He wants you to live. He wants you to enjoy each and every moment you have here.” He kissed me. “Now, let’s check on that chicken.” He was about to turn to the oven but I grabbed his hand. “What is it, baby?”

           “I just wanted to say I love you.”

           He smiled and said, “And I love you. Always and forever.”

[Disclaimer]: Pictures used do not reflect the sexuality or personality of people in the pictures. They only serve as visual examples of the characters.

           The way Louis and I met has to be the craziest story ever. So I’d met this freaky girl in a private Facebook group that said she loved being in threesomes with two dudes. I’d never ran a train on a girl with any of my homeboys and didn’t want to, so when she suggested that I have a threesome with her and another nigga she was replying to on Facebook, I was all for it. I showed up at her house at the same time the other dude showed up, and it was pretty much instant between us. We double-teamed her until she couldn’t take no more, but both of us knew there was something more there. I could feel it in the way he looked at me and I knew he knew that I was checking him out. As we were leaving, we exchanged numbers.

           Before Louis, I’d only fooled around with one other dude and it wasn’t even a full experience. All it did was make my curiosity stronger. Louis gave me the full experience. He was downlow and claimed he liked fucking women just as much as he liked fucking men. And for nearly six years, he fucked me regularly. I got so addicted to him that I moved him into my apartment. We were friends in public and fuck buddies behind closed doors and for a while I was cool with that. It wasn’t until he got a girl pregnant that things started changing between us.

           “Wassup peanut head,” he said to me as he walked into our apartment. He closed and locked the door before collapsing onto the sofa beside me. He kissed my cheek and then kept looking at me. “Why you so quiet?”

           “I’m just thinkin’,” I replied.

           “Thinkin’ ‘bout what?”

           “This whole baby thing.”

           “D, I wish you’d stop trippin’. It ain’t like I’m gonna be with the bitch.”

           “See, this is what pisses me the fuck off. Lou, I don’t give a fuck about you bein’ with her and fuckin’ her. We both fuck females on the side. I just can’t…” I sighed and gave up.

           “You just what?”

           “Nothin’, bruh. Just forget it.”

           “I don’t know what the fuck your problem is but you need to chill the fuck out. I’m with you so there ain’t no problem. I hate when you get like this.”

           “And I hate that you had to go and fuck up a good thing.”

           “If all you gonna do is bitch then I’m out.” He stood up. “I already here this shit from Nyemah, I don’t need it from you.”

           “Leave then.” I turned my focus back to the TV thinking that he would leave, but he sat back down.

           “What do you want me to do, D’Angelo? I’m sorry I got her pregnant but there ain’t shit I can do about that now. It’s in her hands.”

           “You wanna know what you can do?”

           “Yeah. I’ll do anything to make you feel better. You know that.”

           “Be honest with me.”

           “Okay.”

           “Why did you fuck her without a rubber?”

           “What?”

           “Why did you fuck her without a rubber, Lou? Me and you don’t use condoms and we said we’d never fuck anybody else without them. So, why did you do it that one time with Nyemah?”

           “It was outside the club, man. I wasn’t gonna hookup with no bitches that night because I thought you were gonna be up and ready to take some dick after I got in from the club. But when I was leavin’, I saw Nyemah and that ass and…shit bruh I couldn’t help it. And she was givin’ me that look and my dick got hard…”

           “Just stop.”

           “Me and you didn’t fuck that night because when I got in, you was sleep.” He stopped and then put his arm around me. “You mad at me?”

           “What if she would’ve had somethin’?”

           “Bruh, chill. That girl could barely take dick. A bitch with a pussy that damn tight ain’t fuckin’ around. Besides, she said she’d seen me around the club plenty of times before.”

           “I wish you wouldn’t have fucked her.”

           “If I had known she wasn’t on the pill I wouldn’t have fucked her. But what’s done is done. I’ma be a man and take care of my responsibility.”

           When he said that, I couldn’t help but laugh. “Take care of your responsibility? What about your responsibility to what we got goin’?”

           “Here you go again. You sound like a fuckin’ bitch when you say shit like that.”

           “I guess I’m bitch then. You don’t take this shit serious enough for me, Louis. It’s like this shit is just some game to you.”

           “Nigga, I take everything I fuckin’ do seriously! Don’t you ever say no dumb shit like that again!”

           “Oh, so now I get a real reaction out yo ass. Okay.”

           “I swear you like fuckin’ with me for no reason, D. I’m really gettin’ sick of this shit.”

                                      Me (D’Angelo Clark)

           “I’m fuckin’ with you for no reason? Are you serious?! We have a code, Louis! You fuckin’ broke the code when you went up in that bitch raw! And I don’t care if you didn’t mean to do it and that it’s too late to change it, you fucked up!”

           “So what you sayin’?”

           “Nigga, I don’t know if this shit can be fixed. That’s what the fuck I’m sayin’!” I stood up and went down the hall and into my room. Even though he always slept in there with me, it was considered my room whenever we had people over.

           He stormed into the room and asked, “You done with me?”

           “Just leave me alone, Lou.”

           “Nah, if you thinkin’ it then you need to just say it. Are you done with me?”

           “I don’t know but I think you might need to go stay with Junebug or Ant or somebody for a little while. I need time to think.”

           “A’ight, whatever you need. I’ll go pack up some shit and I’ll call Ant on my way to his crib. I guess I can tell him me and you got into it, which wouldn’t be far from the truth.” He was about to leave my room but stopped and turned back towards me before saying, “You know how I feel about you. There ain’t a thing in this world that I wouldn’t do for you. And even when you don’t believe it, I’m always gonna have your back. I love you, bruh.”

           I don’t know why, but I got the strangest feeling when he told me he loved me. We’d been saying that four-letter word to each other so casually but it really did feel different that time. I felt this tingle go up my spine and my heart skipped a beat. It wasn’t until he’d left the apartment that I found myself wondering if I really could walk away from the relationship. What we had was special because no one knew about it. That’s probably why we were able to become so close, because no one could intentionally try to come in between us.

           Louis was pretty much all I had, and before he got Nyemah pregnant, I was all he had. We both grew up in the foster care system. His experience of moving from one group home to the next was almost identical to mine. We liked a lot of the same things and connected on a level that’s hard to even describe. There were times where I’d be thinking of something specific and just before I’d get a chance to say it, he’d say the exact same thing. And then there were times where it seemed like we were having a conversation without speaking to each other. It was weird how in sync we always were with each other. I had no idea just how in sync we were until that hot summer day.

           After he left the apartment, I decided to go for a walk. It was a typical afternoon in the neighborhood. I walked around for a good half hour before turning to head back. That’s when my phone started ringing in my pocket. I took it out and looked at the screen to see it was Louis calling. I ignored the call and continued my walk. About two minutes later, he called again. This time I decided to answer it.

           “What do you want, Lou?” I asked. He didn’t respond. “Lou?” I waited for him to say something but he didn’t. All I could hear was heavy breathing and static. “Louis, I can’t hear you. The phone got a bad connection.”

           “Meet me,” he finally said through the static.

           “What?”

           “Meet me at the…park.”

           “Huh? What park?”

           “The…park.”

           “I can’t hear what…” The phone clicked and I looked at the screen to see he’d hung up.

                                         Louis Jenkins

           His voiced sounded so weird. I could tell it was him but there was something different in the way he sounded. Cedar Park was the nearest park so I began walking towards it. I was almost halfway to it anyway so it would’ve taken longer to go back and get my car instead of just walking. When I got to the park, he wasn’t there. I looked all around and didn’t see him anywhere. I figured that he must’ve still been on his way, so I sat down and waited. After about twenty minutes, I called him back but his phone went straight to voicemail. I texted him three different times but the texts remained unread. I didn’t know what was going on, but I wasn’t liking the way it was making me feel.

           After waiting for a little while longer, I gave up and decided to walk back home. I thought about Louis and that weird phone call the whole way back. The moment I turned down our street, I smelled smoke. I looked up and noticed my building was on fire! There was a fire truck spraying water and police and people everywhere. I couldn’t believe what my eyes were seeing. I spotted my neighbor Kevonte and hurried over to him to find out what happened.

           “Yo Kevonte,” I called out as I approached him. “What the hell happened?”

           “You know Mrs. Hendricks?” he asked me.

           “The old lady that lives in the apartment above mine?”

           “Yeah. Somethin’ happened in her apartment and it caught that whole side of the buildin’ on fire.”

           “Shit, that means all my stuff got burnt! Fuck! Man, I can’t believe this shit!” I took a deep breath and tried to calm down. “Is Mrs. Hendricks alright?”

           “Nah man. I heard a firefighter say she was dead, bruh. Her and her cats died up in there. Shit is fucked up.”

           “Damn. I feel bad she died like that. My stuff, though.”

           “D’Angelo!” Louis called out. I looked behind me to see him getting out of his car. He ran over to me. I could tell he wanted to hug me but couldn’t due to our surrounding. “You okay, bruh?”

           “Yeah, I wasn’t in there. I had taken a walk and…” I suddenly remembered his phone call. “Wait, why did you come back here?”

           “Because I got all the way to Ant’s crib and realized I left my phone in the apartment.”

           “What? No, that’s not possible. You called me and told me to meet you at Cedar Park.”

           “Huh? No I didn’t.”

           “Yes you did. It was while I was heading back here. I walked to the park but you never showed up.”

           “D, I didn’t call you from my phone. I couldn’t have. It’s up in the apartment.”

           “Louis…” I pulled my phone from my pocket and pulled up my recent calls history. That’s when things really got weird. His two phone calls to me weren’t there. They weren’t in my recent calls history. “I don’t know what’s going on but you called me and told me to meet you at the park. My phone must’ve deleted the two calls from the history.”

           “D’Angelo, how could I have called you if my phone is upstairs probably burnt up by the fire? I never called you.”

           I felt like I was going crazy. I know for a fact that I didn’t imagine him calling me. How could something like that had happened? After talking to the firefighters and police, we learned that Mrs. Hendricks’s gas line behind her stove had cracked. She must’ve lit a cigarette or something and the apartment exploded, causing other apartments to catch on fire. Her floor and our roof caved in so had I been home, I would’ve died. That phone call from Louis saved my life. His phone had been destroyed inside of the apartment so there was no explanation for how I got the phone call from that phone.

           “Are you sure you’re okay?” he asked me as we rode in his car.

           “Yeah,” I told him. “This whole thing just doesn’t make sense, man. You gotta believe me, Lou; I’m not making it up.”

           “I believe you. If you would’ve walked back to the apartment instead of goin’ to Cedar Park…I don’t even wanna think about it. You’re safe and that’s all that matters.”

           “What are we gonna do?”

           “Well, we can stay at a hotel until we find another place. We just gotta work more hours than usual. We can replace all the stuff we lost. What we could never replace is each other. I know you’re still mad at me but we still got each other, D’Angelo. No matter what.”

           “I know.”

           “I love you.”

           “I love you, too.” I reached over and grabbed his free hand as he drove with the other.

           After that experience, our relationship changed. We became closer than we already were. I forgave him for getting Nyemah pregnant and I made sure he knew that I wasn’t going to leave him ever. About three weeks later, Nyemah got in a fight at the club with some girl. The girl’s friends jumped Nyemah and she ended up miscarrying at fourteen weeks. I could tell Louis was hurt by it so I did whatever I could to comfort him. All the while, we never discussed what happened the day our apartment burned. But both of us knew why it happened. We knew without a doubt that we were meant to be together, and that if we tried to break up, fate would only pull us back together again. That day was definitely a test for me. I’d never doubt how strong our love is for each other every again in my life.

[Disclaimer]: Pictures used do not reflect the sexuality or personality of people in the pictures. They only serve as visual examples of the characters.

           The cold February night Byron and his homeboys were shot was definitely the worst night of my life. Before I learned about the shooting, it had been the best day of my life because I’d received a full-ride scholarship to NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts. I’d found my way out of West Baltimore but my joy was cut short because the only boy I’d ever loved was shot five times and was fighting for his life. I remember going to the crime scene and seeing the black Ford Expedition riddled with so many bullet holes. There was blood everywhere and even though it had happened hours before and I wasn’t there when it happened, I could still hear his screams and his cries for help. My breath was taken away. My heart was taken away.

           By that summer, he was still in a coma and I was depressed. I was barely eating anything and I only wore black. I never hung out with my friends and I only left my house to practice dance routines at the studio. All I could do was think about my Byron and pray that he’d make it through. For some reason, our last conversation would always pop up in my mind. It wasn’t an argument or anything like that. Our last conversation was about me having his back no matter what. His last words to me were, “Never let me go.” It was so random but I didn’t even think about it at the time he said it. I didn’t understand how important those words would be later.

           “Are you sure you don’t want to go with me?” my mama asked me as she put in her earrings. “You know Lynn and Gayle won’t mind.”

           “Ma, it’s a ladies’ night out,” I said. “Y’all go have fun.”

           “You sure?”

           “Yes, I’m sure. You’ve been working all week and you need to have some fun for a change. I have some reading to catch up on.”

           “Reading? You just graduated high school a couple of months ago and you’re reading?” She laughed and shook her head. “When I graduated high school, the last thing I wanted to do was read something that reminded me of classwork.” She noticed that I wasn’t laughing and came over to the sofa where I was sitting. “Sweetie, I know this year has been difficult but you have to keep your focus on your future. You’re going to New York in a few weeks to start a whole new life.” She softly stroked my hair and sat down beside me.

           “How can I start a new life when Byron will still be here? What if he never wakes up, mama?”

           “Kyle, I know you love that boy but what happened to him isn’t that much of a surprise.”

           “Mama…”

           “No, you need to hear this. I have been walking around here on eggshells for months hoping that you’d move on but it’s gone on too long now. Byron was a thug. He’s in that stupid Lafayette Street Killas gang and he sold drugs. He couldn’t even be with you in public. I do not understand what you saw in him. I’ll never understand it.”

           “You could never understand it because my connection with him is unexplainable, mama. It’s like he’s a part of me and I’m a part of him, and when we’re together there’s this overwhelming sense of unity. We’re complete opposites but we fit together so perfectly.”

           “You’re going to have to let him go, Kyle. You cannot put your life on hold just so that you can hold onto some shred of hope that he’ll wake up out of that coma. What happened to him and his thug friends was unfortunate but he put himself in that situation.”

           “I don’t want to talk about this right now.”

           “See, every time I try to get through to you, you shut me down and then you shut yourself down. You can’t keep going on like this, sweetheart. You weren’t the one sitting in that car, he was. You’re not the one in the coma, he is. Count your blessings and move on.”

           “Count my blessings? Mama, besides you, Byron was all I had. I shared things with him that you could never understand. He was more than just my boyfriend and my first love, he was mine. I truly believe he and I were put on this earth to be together. And the fact that I can’t be with him right now…it’s a pain that you could never know.” Tears filled my eyes and I buried my face in my hands.

           “I’m sorry but all I want is for you to take advantage of the big opportunity that has been given to you. I want you to get out of this place and never look back. And when you make it big, send money for my cute ass to get out of here.” She laughed and I couldn’t help but look at her and crack a smile. “There’s that smile I miss.” She hugged me. “I don’t care how old you get, you’re always gonna be my lil’ itty bitty. I love you, baby.”

           “I love you, too, mama.”

                                          Me (Kyle McKell)

           After assuring her that I’d be fine, she headed out to have fun with her friends. Instead of reading the novel I’d planned on reading that night, I decided to just curl up on the sofa and scroll through my phone and look at all of the pics of me and Byron that I had stored on it and on my micro SD card. Some of the pics on my micro SD were from my old digital camera, back when he and I first started talking and I was still a virgin. We spent most of our time in my bedroom talking and cuddling, so most of the pics were in that setting.

           I met Byron Patterson on the first day of ninth grade at Frederick Douglass High School. It was after school and I was walking home when a group of boys started picking on me and threatened to beat me up. They chased me down an alley and just as they were about to jump me, Byron and his homeboys came out of nowhere and fought the guys who were messing with me. They whooped their asses and I took off running. I didn’t even realize I’d dropped my backpack in the alley until Byron showed up at my door with it. My wallet was inside and so was my ID, which was how he found me. He told me he saw the group of guys chasing me and that he rounded up his boys to save me. When I asked him why he did that, he just smiled and then handed me his number.

           I learned that day that Byron and his friends back then lived by a specific code. They never harmed children or older people, and they always stood up for people who were outnumbered in a situation—such as the one I’d been in. Byron was my first everything. He treated me like royalty and I was so in love with him. Even when we I did something to make him mad, he’d easily forgive me and then kiss me.

           “I can’t stay mad at you,” he’d say with that cute smile of his. “How can I stay mad at my boo?”

           I swear whenever he called me his boo, I melted inside. Things changed when he dropped out of school near the end of our tenth grade year. He joined the Lafayette Street Killas and began selling drugs. I wanted him to leave that gang but he said he couldn’t because his brother was a member and when he died, the gang approached him to join. He told them no at first but they threatened to kill him if he didn’t join. So he joined and I hated it, but I wasn’t going to give up on him or our relationship. I stayed with him and we made sure we were careful. The only people who knew about our relationship were my best friend Erika and my mama.

           So there I was curled up on the sofa looking at old pics of me and Byron, when all of a sudden I heard footsteps running upstairs. Startled, I jumped up and hurried over to the staircase. I looked up but didn’t see anyone. The lights were off upstairs so I slowly walked up the stairs. When I got up there, I turned on the hall light to see my bedroom door had been closed. I distinctly remembered leaving it open.

           “Hello?” I called out as I approached my door. “Is anybody in here?” I opened the door and screamed when I saw Byron lying on my bed shirtless. I grabbed my chest because my heart was pounding.

                                            Byron Patterson

           “Oh, I ain’t mean to scare you,” he said with that smile on his face. “You a’ight?”

           “What are you doing here? How are you here right now?” I pinched myself. “Have I lost my mind?”

           “Kyle, you didn’t lose your mind. Boo, I’m here.”

           “That’s not possible.”

           He sat up and climbed off my bed and told me, “I’m here.” He grabbed my hand and that’s when tears filled my eyes. “I need you.”

           “I need you, too.”

           “No, I really need you. Boo, you gotta pay close attention because there ain’t much time left.” He stared into my eyes. “You have to stop them.”

           “Stop who?”

           “The people in my hospital room right now. They’re gonna kill me, Kyle.”

           “What?”

           “If you don’t stop them they’ll kill me. It’s not my time. You’re my only hope, baby.”

           “But I don’t understand. How can…”

           “Never let me go, Kyle.” He wrapped his arms around me. “Never let me go.”

           Before I could say anything else to him, I woke up on the sofa. It was a dream. I’d fallen asleep on the sofa while looking at the pics of me and him. My heart was still pounding in my chest and I had the strangest feeling in my gut. I put my hands up to my face and that’s when I realized his scent was all over me. He always smelled of Axe body wash, cocoa butter and a hint of Black & Mild because he smoked those all the time. That scent was on me as if he’d just been holding me. And I kept hearing his voice over and over in my head saying, “Never let me go.”

           I didn’t even put on presentable clothes, I just slid on a pair of shoes, grabbed my keys and phone, and dashed out of my house. I figured I’d get to the hospital faster if I ran, so I ran past the bus stop instead of waiting on the next bus. The urgency in Byron’s voice was driving me by that point. I knew it was only a dream but I had to be sure. I had to know if he was really in danger and if I could save him the way that he’d saved me years ago.

           When I got to the hospital he’d been in since February, I took the elevator up to the tenth floor where his room was. I got to the door and paused for a few seconds to catch my breath. I then opened the door and stepped inside to see some of his family and friends gathered around his bed. Sitting next to him was a doctor, who looked like he was trying to remove something.

           “Stop!” I called out, causing everyone to turn their attention to me.

           “Who the hell is this faggot?” asked one of Byron’s homeboys.

           “I think you’re in the wrong room, honey,” said Byron’s mama. I knew who she was because he’d shown my pictures of her before.

           “No, I’m not in the wrong room. I know Byron from…school. I used to tutor him before he dropped out and…”

           “Get the fuck outta here!” another gang member shouted.

           “Nah hold up,” said Dequan, one of Byron’s old friends. “Your name is Kyle, right?”

           “Yeah. Do you remember me? Remember the guys tried to jump me after school and y’all helped me?”

           “I remember. What you doin’ here?”

           “I know this sounds crazy but…it’s not his time.”

           “It’s time for you to leave,” said one of Byron’s family members.

           “No, please,” I pleaded. “My grandma used to always say God speaks to us in many different ways, and all we have to do is listen. God spoke to me tonight and he told me that it isn’t Byron’s time. I don’t know when he’ll wake up or if he’ll be alright after waking up, but he is going to wake up.”

           “This is fucked up,” said Byron’s homeboy. “I know y’all not gonna let some faggot ass bitch come up in here and play games!” He reached to the back of his pants and said, “I should smoke this bitch right here.”

           “I wanna see you try,” I snapped at him. “I am so sick of you and your poison. It’s your fault this happened to him in the first place! He didn’t deserve this! He’s not bad like you and your fake ass thug wannabe homeboys. Fuck you and fuck the Lafayette Street Killas!”

           Everyone lost their cool by that point. We were all shouting at each other and getting in each other’s faces. All of a sudden, I noticed the doctor leaning over Byron. The machines were beeping faster and louder. The doctor raised his hand and our yelling died down gradually. We all turned our attention to the doctor. The moment I heard Byron wheezing, tears filled my eyes.

           “He’s coming out of his comatose state,” said the doctor.

           “Oh thank the Lord,” called out Byron’s mama.

           The doctor looked at me and informed me, “Had you not walked in that door at the exact time you did, this patient would be dead. I was moments away from disconnecting the machines keeping him alive.”

           It only took about twenty minutes for Byron to wake up and get through some excessive coughing. The doctor made us all step out into the hall while he and some nurses checked Byron’s vital signs and other functions. While his fellow gang members still looked like they wanted to kill me, his family were thankful.

           “I don’t know who you are,” said his mama with tears in her eyes, “but you saved my baby’s life. That’s my only child in there and I’d given up on the hope of him ever waking up.”

           “It wasn’t me,” I told her. “It was Byron.”

           The doctor stepped out of the room and told us, “In my twenty years of dealing with comatose patients, I’ve never witnessed this. He’s going to make a full recovery. He’ll need to stay in the hospital for monitoring for two weeks but after that, he’ll be able to return home.”

           “Thank you so much, Dr. Radcliff,” said Byron’s mama.

           “Oh, he wants to see Kyle,” the doctor told us. “He specifically requested to talk to Kyle in private.”

           They all looked at me and I assured them, “He probably heard me when I entered the room. I’ll tell him you’re all out here waiting to see him.” I stepped into the room and closed the door. There were still some nurses in there moving things around, so I was expecting him to be coded with me in front of them.

           He smiled and coughed a little before saying, “Damn, look at you. You look just like you did the last time I saw you.”

           “You remember?” I asked him as tears rolled down my face.

           “I remember everything. Come here, boo.” I sat down beside him and he placed his hand over mine. “I’m sorry.”

           “No, you have nothing to apologize for.”

           “Yes I do. I fucked up. Fuckin’ around with that stupid gang shit…” He shook his head. “I can’t even think about what you been goin’ through.”

           “Byron, you’re here and you’re going to be fine. That’s all that matters.”

           “No, I’m supposed to protect you. How can I do that if I’m not here?” He touched my face. “I love you, baby.”

           I looked around and laughed nervously before telling him, “Byron, we’re not alone.”

           “I don’t care. I’ve been in this hospital a long ass time, ain’t I?”

           “Yeah, it’s been about six months.”

           “Six months without seein’ you and touchin’ you.” He leaned forward and kissed my lips. “I promise you I’ll never leave you alone again. On my life, baby.” He wiped my tears.

           “I wasn’t sure if I was going to go to New York in a few weeks.”

           “Oh yeah, the dance scholarship. You found out about that the day I got…” He stopped and shook his head. “You were gonna stay here because of me? Nah, I wouldn’t have wanted that.”

           “I couldn’t leave you.”

           “You know your moms woulda kicked your ass if you tried to stay here instead of goin’.” We shared a good laugh.

           “True.”

           He paused and had this look on his face as if he was remembering something. “Yo, I had this crazy dream. I probably had a lot of them but I can only remember this one.”

           “What was it about?”

           “I was in bed with you in your room and we were about to go to sleep. Of course we were naked.” He laughed and I smiled at him. “So we was in bed and I told you I had to be somewhere at ten, and that I needed you to wake me up at nine-forty-five.” He looked into my eyes for a second and then turned and looked up at the big clock on the wall. “Boo, when I woke up in this hospital tonight the first thing I did was look up at that clock. It was nine-forty-five on the dot. You woke me up just like you said you would.”

           It was in that moment that I realized we really were one entity at times. It wasn’t just some coincidence that we both had surreal dreams and that he woke up from the coma following those surreal dreams. We were meant to be together and there really was no denying it. I was more than just happy that he was going to be alright, I was overjoyed. I had to keep pinching myself to make sure it was really happening.

           So after talking and kissing for the longest, he finally explained to me what happened the night he and his homeboys were shot. He told me they were parked outside of a fish market waiting on their food when a white van pulled up and just started shooting. He remembered getting hit once in the shoulder but passed out after that. He had no idea who shot them and when I told him he was the only one in the SUV to survive the shooting, it really sunk in how lucky he was.

           Before I left to let him spend time with his family and friends, he told me to do something very important. He’d stashed a duffle bag full of money under the floorboards of a trap house him and his homeboys did work at. He told me I was the only person he could trust with it, and gave me instructions on how to get into the house without being seen.

           “You gotta enter from the broken kitchen window in the back,” he told me. “That window is our escape outta the house in case some shit goes down. Sneak in through that window and go into the pantry on the right. The money is under the floorboards in that pantry. It’s gotta be like fifty thousand in that bag, maybe more.”

           “What do you want me to do with it?” I asked him.

           “Take it with you to New York. Put it in an account or somethin’. That’s our money, boo.”

           “But what about you?”

           “I damn sure ain’t stayin’ here. Once I get released from here and I can get around by myself, I’m outta Baltimore. I’ll come up there with you.”

           “I don’t wanna leave you, Byron.”

           “It won’t be for long, boo. I promise.” He gently placed his forehead to mine. “You have my word. I love you.”

           “I love you, too.”

           After leaving the hospital, I did just as he’d said. Luckily, no one was at the trap house. I was able to get the money and take it back to my house. I took it up to my room and hid it in my closet just before my mama came home. I told her Byron woke up and while she still wasn’t ready to accept my relationship with him, she was happy to see me happy. I didn’t tell her about the money and the plan I’d made with Byron, but I did tell her that I looked forward to going to New York.

           Three weeks later, I enrolled at NYU’s Tisch School of the Arts. I’d been talking on the phone with Byron daily and I’d put the money in an account with both our names on it. One day after my classes, I had to return to my studio apartment to get something I’d left behind. I had the strangest feeling in my gut the moment I got to my building. I entered the lobby and dropped all my stuff the moment I saw him sitting there waiting on me. I couldn’t believe it. I had everything I could’ve ever wanted, and he was everything I wanted. And I was never going to let go.

[Disclaimer]: Pictures used do not reflect the sexuality or personality of people in the pictures. They only serve as visual examples of the characters.

           I opened my eyes for the third time to see I was now shirtless and standing on a balcony overlooking a courtyard on a beautiful warm morning. This reality was definitely more pleasant than the previous two and I didn’t feel a strange vibe as I had with the others. The air was so fresh and everything looked new around me, including the outdoor bamboo wicker chair I realized I was leaning against. I was careful this time not to do anything that would cause me to black out again because I remembered what would happen if I ventured further than three different realities. With that in mind, I decided to remain exactly how I arrived and waited for the essence of that reality to approach me.

                                                  Jordan (Me)

           “Are you ready, Jordan?” a man’s voice asked me from within the room that the balcony was attached to. “Don’t be afraid. Come on in and learn why you’re here.”

           Slowly, I backed away from the bamboo wicker chair and immediately noticed my navel was pierced. I’d always wanted it pierced but never had it done because I was afraid of what people would think if they ever saw it. I stopped thinking about it as I proceeded into the room. Unlike the previous two realities, nothing seemed familiar at first. I’d never seen the outside nor the inside of that room before in my life. However, when I noticed who was lying on the bed, I realized familiarity had taken the form of someone from my personal life. His name was Bryce and he was my girlfriend’s best friend and roommate. I had no idea why he was appearing to me in nothing but a pair of yellow briefs but there he was.

           “What is this?” I asked him.

           Keeping his attention on the large uncovered windows that showed the other side of whatever building we were in, he sighed and told me, “As with your last journey and the one before that, there can only be one way forward. If you make a mistake then you will proceed to your fourth and we both know what that means.”

                                                   Bryce

           “Bryce, what do you have to do with any of this?”

           “You tell me. I’m in your process, not the other way around. If I’m here then it means you want me here.”

           “That doesn’t make any sense. It would make more sense if Rochelle was here half-naked.”

           “Why am I here then? Make it make sense, Jordan.”

           As I tried to think of a reason for why he was there, I noticed how the morning sunrise caused a singular beam of light to bounce off of his golden skin. He was as heavenly pure as a virgin in holy water and as hauntingly beautiful as honey being harvested from a honeycomb covered in killer bees. I knew I was meant to admire him in that moment; however, the thought of going past admiring him seemed dangerous. I’d never wanted to see him that way before; yet somehow, that was the way he appeared to me. If this was truly my mind’s doing, I indeed wanted him as he was.

           Summer break was coming to an end and I was ready to go back off to college at the University of Tennessee for my sophomore year. As prepared I was to return to school, I was a little mad at myself for not accomplishing the one thing I’d wanted to do before the end of summer: suck and maybe even get fucked by my future stepbrother’s dick. I’d wanted to get freaky with Deandre the moment our parents introduced us to each other. His dad had already moved into me and my mama’s house earlier in the year and Deandre was spending the last few weeks of the summer break with us. I was determined to get Deandre’s dick before our parents got married that October and I wasn’t accepting defeat.

           It was a hot afternoon, just days before we were both to leave off for our second year of college that weekend. I’d bought a pack of ExtenZe liquid male enhancement while out on my run that morning and had to wait for the perfect opportunity to use it. When he came home from hanging out with some friends at the mall, I noticed he had a cup from McDonald’s in his hand as I stared out from my window. He entered the house and I heard him come upstairs and go into the guest bedroom across the hall, which he’d been staying in while visiting us. When I heard the bedroom door reopen, I peeked through the crack in my door and saw him coming out of the bedroom with nothing but a towel around his waist. He went into the bathroom and I soon heard the sound of the shower running. I knew I had a little time to do what I needed to do, so I got to it.

                                          Me (Montel Robinson)

           I made my way into his room and quickly removed the top from his McDonald’s cup. I poured the male enhancement liquid into his drink and stirred it with his straw before putting the top back on it. Not a second after I’d returned to my room, I heard the shower turn off and the sound of him going back into his room. I was nervous as hell but had it in my mind that he’d automatically come to my room once that stuff made him horny. Why wouldn’t he? He knew I was gay and he’d caught me looking at him many times. Nearly an hour went by and I was ready to give up when I got a notification on my phone. I’d created a fake Instagram account so that I could see Deandre’s Instagram because it was private and I knew he’d never allow me to see his posts. He’d made a recent post and I checked it out.

           I laughed to myself and asked, “Oh, is that right?”