welcometothevoid,darling

something about tim trying everything to find where he belongs and hawk sticking to one thing even though he knows they'll never let him belong there.

the phrase “loving you is muscle memory” keeps running thru my head and i can’t stop thinking about how applicable it is to tim and hawk. they saw each other just a handful of times after the ’50s, yet every time they did see each other, they fell right back into that same dynamic. their love isn’t something they had to think about - it came as naturally to them as blinking or breathing.

one symbolic costume choice in fellow travelers that makes me insane is how, as the decades go on, Tim's style changes and adapts with the decade and who he is meanwhile Hawk's style stays very similar to what he's always in from the start (the hair, the button up shirt, trousers, etc). Tim changes and grows and comes more into himself meanwhile Hawk is relatively stagnant

Just thinking about how Hawk always behaves like he is so much wiser and knows so much more than Tim about how the world works but in reality Tim always did so much more with his life, believed in so much more, fought for so much more, and if I'm being honest has seen and experienced so much more and no matter how hard Hawk tries to keep the wise role he just starts to seem more and more like a child as the show goes on

I just finished watching Fellow Travelers and oh my god. I cannot stop thinking about the contrast at the end of Tim literally about to die but he's on stage surrounded by his community and he's standing up for what he believes in like he always does and his life has so much meaning vs Hawk walking into his house completely healthy and alive but the house is empty and he has nothing. And also the fact that Tim has no regrets because he always lived as authentically as he could and fought with passion and loved Hawk unapologetically whereas Hawk will always have to wonder what his life could have been if he hadn't shut everyone out to protect his own image. Hawk remains "bulletproof" all the way to the end but that also means that he closed himself off to love and vulnerability and real happiness. And when he finally does start to let his guard down, it's too late.

the choice of music in fellow travelers is just so brilliant… using Stevie Wonder’s if it’s magic, for the opening scene, including the notable line “if it’s magic/then why can’t it be everlasting?” (not to mention the lyric change in the final chorus: “if it’s magic/why can’t we MAKE it everlasting?) And then proceeding to tell a love story over the span of nearly 40 years and both explicitly and sub-textually detailing all of the reasons it couldn’t be made everlasting. And that’s just in the first five minutes. Insanity.

i dont see why i cant start a trend, so here goes. lets try to build back our attention spans. lets try to focus on just one thing for as long as possible. lets not watch those "asmr for people with adhd" videos where they fuck up adhd folks even worse. lets resist the urge to reach for our phones when watching a movie. lets read the articles we reblog, even when theyre boring. i know its hard, i have adhd too, but its worth it. i also know that this hard work doesnt always seem super impressive to other people, so id love for yall to tell me in the tags or replies if youve done something, no matter how small, for your attention span. you deserve to feel like youve taken back some of what social media has ripped from you

proclaiming we're in a lesbian music renaissance NOW thanks to artists like Billie Eilish, Chapell Roan, Fletcher, Phoebe Bridgers, Dove Cameron and Renee Rapp is qWHITE interesting to me (dgmw I like those artists but)........... people are acting like Janelle Monae, Victoria Monet, Hayley Kiyoko, Arlo Parks, Halsey, Kehlani, Syd, Dua Saleh, Raveena, Kelela, and even Megan Thee Stallion haven't been CONSISTENTLY making music about loving women and eating pussy for well over a decade. is it only a "sapphic music renaissance" when white lesbians and queer women do it?

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