yandere fuckers come get y'all juice (18+)

Thank you for everything you've done with this blog, and best of luck for whatever comes next ❤️

Asks like these are so heartwarming but also what makes it so incredibly painful that I'm having to move blogs. It means a lot to me that you sent this and I hope we can find each other again soon 😭

I totally understand people being too shy to come off anon so I guess the best I can say is, that I'm still going to be around and with all the specific fandoms I write for I think people familiar with my work will hopefully find me again before too much longer.

I really hope to get back into all of my hobbies more soon, and that also goes for writing. It's a good outlet for my stress and my frustrations and honestly i kind of need to spend less time on apps and stuff anyways so im also thinking of this in a "i want to write + i need to get back into using my time productively" kind of way

I still get all kinds of ideas for Hazbin, DC, i still think of the Chocobros, i even caught myself thinking of that one specific "female Reader x yandere CEO/high level manager Deku" idea i had a while back

But I also... cant help but like. Be sad obviously. I look at my follower count and how long that's taken and I wonder if, I could easily reach that again and a big part of things is just that I don't publish as much

You know sometimes I still think about you guys helping me when me and my mom were homeless and how amazing that was. You guys have honestly helped keep me alive and going more than just a couple times. I hope you guys know how important that was to me and how grateful I am

I've had this blog for like, what, 8, 9, 10 or so years and im really sad to lose all of that :( and also especially losing that connection with you guys, with you being able to contact me and all that. I deleted my ao3 recently and I very quickly started getting asks on my main from people looking for things they apparently regularly re-read and I just..

Obviously, moving blogs and regaining my privacy from my family and better separating my online and offline lives is more important but I sort of "feel like a jerk" for "creating all this mess" or something like that :(

What if my new blog never gets as big as this one? What if there were people that really wanted to stay in touch with me and we missed each other and never see each other again? I'm so bad with names and faces that I can't possibly reach out to all my regulars and mutuals to try and round everyone up and go all "hey find me at new blog xyz". What if people just don't send asks anymore? What if I delete and then just never write again?

I'm starting a new job soon and up to so much with new friends, but then the economy is getting scarier. I live alone now and what if I start struggling to survive? I want to try and look forward to the future but the future sounds incredibly uncertain and scary? I want to do fun things and instead everything seems so life and death like I have to put every penny away. I worry about being homeless.

In the past I would be able to use this platform in case of an emergency, to beg for money from people who knew me and wanted to help, but now I wont really have that anymore? I have to start basically all over? If I do commissions, who will want them? The record of what I've wrote and the popularity I've built up just won't be there

But... i have to. The whole sister and stalker and doxxing thing makes it a necessity. But it's still depressing. I have so many memories here. It's like I'm losing friends by deleting and not "having everyone stick around".

There's just so many uncertainties, in my health, in my finances,in my country, in my family, with my cat :( I just want to be a silly little guy with silly little hobbies and the world is far too scary... im just anxious all the time... sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't delete because this is the name I'm known under for commission purposes

It's already too late to go back though and I have to do this to move forward :( I have so many regrets. There's so much time I wish i could've done more with, so many things I wanted to write, so many people I wish I was better friends to. I want to try and go back on medicine and see if I cant punch through the learned helplessness of not doing anything if it takes too much time or effort. I want to actually have hobbies and fun again and not just rot my brain doomscrolling

I dunno... i juat feel really sad. I don't want "to leave anybody behind" and "lose the life that I have" but everything is changing :( I feel kind of like a helpless kid honestly.

Thank you to everyone who's followed me for years. I really am sorry I lost my spark and stopped writing at some point. I think at some point I just felt like none of my fics were any good anymore. I feel like in general I'm kind of average in talent. But... I feel like I still have that creative love inside of me and I hope to share it again someday

With how dire things are right now i think one of the best things we can hope for is that we all keep a little piece of empathy and love and hope and creativity inside of us. I don't know how much longer I can afford to live on my own, but I can at least afford sharing my ideas with you guys for us all to have fun over

I wasn't even old enough to be menstruating and my mother would be asking me for advice on how to handle my sister and literally by no exaggeration telling me "i was her rock and she would completely fall apart without me" and it turned out my mother just didnt have ANY friends so she was constantly inappropriately trauma dumping on both of her children constantly to the point of being manipulative and abusive

She made me believe i was so special and smart and she relied on me TOO MUCH and then it turned out she was basically just constantly venting about both of her children.... to her own children, about each other, basically going back and forth based on who she was mad at

Separating my family from my hobbies and personal life by remaking my blogs is only a matter of safety given how not only abusive both of them are, but they genuinely struggle with understanding social boundaries and my mother raised us in a retaliatory "I feel that you wronged me therefore im justified in treating you like shit and trying to make your life worse" kind of way so both of them have "revenge seeking" malicious behaviors they're way too old for

My sister literally sexually abused me by calling her boyfriend (who was abusive and beating her) and humiliating me by loudly describing my naked body to him where i could hear how she was describing me.

And my mother WAS STILL gossiping behind my back to her about me over ANYTHING and also talking shit about my sister to ME and she genuinely refused to stop until I basically started being outright abusive to her to force her to stop dumping all her emotions on me

By no exaggeration her STILL venting about my sister to me even after I moved for safety and im literally telling her I hope my sister gets killed like literally telling i wont feel safe until my sister is dead and my mother STILL wouldn't stop dumping ALLLLLL her issues with my sister on me and asking me for advice "and please dont post on your blog where she can see it 🥺 im still gonna tell you anyways though even though I think you might do that because I dont respect either one of you 🥺" like literally acknowledging that I could share everything and blow everything up because my sister and I hate each other and she was STILL trying to cause shit!!!

My sister attempting to physically attack me with heavy glass liquor bottles IN FRONT OF MY MOM and my mom STILL playing high school mean girl "can I just vent to you about something your sister did 🥺" between both of us almost fucking daily

My entire childhood was ruined by these women and I wont let them take my hobbies and my friends too. My new job has a promising future and I'll tell everyone in the community what my family has done to me if it keeps them away from me

I'm not ashamed of who I am but I AM ashamed of not leaving my worthless loser family sooner than I did. I didnt want to believe the multiple childhood therapists who outright told me me and my mother were enmeshed and my mom wasn't letting me have my own identity and now at almost 30 I had to kick out of my apartment because she started randomly moving the furniture around in an apartment she doesnt even live in or pay money for because SHE thought it should all be different and when i say, again for the record, I was sitting there repeatedly telling her to stop to the point i was literally breaking down in tears and she was smiling completely unable to understand what was wrong with her actions the entire time and genuinely in her heart thought I was overreacting as I was beginning to sob because I was having to literally beg her to just sit down and she was refusing and making excuses for why it was ok

I'll have permanent trust issues for the rest of my life. I guess that's more fuel for content for you guys but. There really is a pain in realizing your life was only horrible because your mom is just incompetent and fucked up and all around weird

There's a historically significant very serious food and energy crisis coming. It's already starting to slowly roll out right now as food and gas inflates in price.

The illegal attack on Iran not only caused worldwide shipping problems but it caused many farmers all over the world to miss planting season. We aren't talking JUST inflation: there's going to be scarcity genuinely worse than Covid. Speaking of which there's currently a rapidly spreading ebola outbreak that's already historically/statistically significant!

There's also the possibility this year's El Niño may become a Super El Niño which will make it a storm so catastrophic we're talking if Hurricane Katrina tore through several countries and caused massive flooding and droughts and famines. Did you know citizens in the southern US basically NEVER got FEMA aid after Hurricane Helene? Our government straight up doesnt give a fuck about helping us anymore; they're hallowing out our country for resources and are trying to make us a massive prison-labor economy

So this is from me to not just my fellow Americans but to everyone reading this right now:

start stocking up on nonperishable foods. Canned meats, tuna pouches, rice, dried beans, water, water purification tablets.

Start exercising amd strength training not just for your health but also for matters of possible self defense. Historically in times of crisis, people who are hungry and desperate and starving often resort to crime. You may someday have to defend yourself from being robbed or defend people trying to steal food from your home. Consider purchasing a metal baseball bat

In a time period where the government is trying to say life begins at fertilization and they want to make it legal to hunt people down and kill them for wanting to have an abortion, we should also be having the discussion of what I've been calling Radical Celibacy. In a world where it's becoming dangerous to be pregnant even if you WANT kids, in a world where mothers who already have children are being left to die because their malformed fetus still has a heartbeat, having sex at all is becoming a life threatening risk, AND the global elites are literally constantly throwing us into the corporate meat grinders and by no exaggeration are hunting children all over the globe. We're being bred like cattle and now we're just straight up by no exaggeration watching women's rights go completely backwards

Don't just prepare to survive, prepare to recover and grow stronger. Start keeping physical notes and journals of any skills you might need or have learned, things you can reread or copy down again if you potentially don't have your phone or electricity. I've been meaning to keep journals for things just like tailoring, growing food/rotating crops/keeping soil healthy, how to purify water, how to make repairs. Record your knowledge to help yourself and others

I wish I was fearmongering but I'm not. We ARE heading for historically significant hardship. I'm worried how I'm going to survive and I'm worried for others too. Literally, there's certain medical care I'm finally seeking and will just bite the bullet on, because certain financial aid programs i can use now literally may not exist or have the funding to function in the future. Also it's like... might as well get things looked at before it becomes debilitating during a crisis. Hospitals are becoming so short staffed they're fundamentally changing how they operate like having some roles and consulting being performed via webcam. America is basically collapsing.

These are all reasons I'm trying to stay posting and thinking of story ideas: art and creating and having our own fun may be one of the only luxuries and things we will be able to afford enjoying. I.... I also just deadass believe civil war will break out eventually but I genuinely don't know where things are going, and I just... idk. My writing hobby and my friends are keeping me from losing it

just thought i'd mention it in case you didn't know -- no pressure, obviously :P

good luck with everything!!!

Ooo I think I'll definitely do this! Even though I'm deleting, this way I can back things up in case I want to repost them later or even use them for other content. One thing id like to start doing is practicing my art again so I can get back to drawing and making comics and stuff and I think that'd just be something fun :)

I really REALLY want to say this is more of a "by deleting and remaking im shaking off my sister following my accounts and by my assumptions she wouldn't really have that easy of a time finding my new blogs, and even if she did she would be randomly accusing someone without proof, so I'm still gonna be around posting very quickly after deleting" situation

I just want to be able to post some goofy bullshit like "hey here's another soulmate Superman x Reader scenario" without worrying im gonna bump into her on the street and she can just whip out her phone and show people stuff, because that's the kind of person she is. She would be harassing my mother and i inside our apartment she was staying as a guest at and she would be deliberately riling us up to record our responses and share them with other people to frame it as her being abused for no reason. Even after things between my sister and I started getting physical and my mom and I weren't feeling safe in our own home, even after my mom was a witness to me being attacked multiple times, even after my sister lied to police to try and have them harm me, my mom was apparently still gossiping between us and basically still does so.

Deleting and remaking just gives me some reassurance I'm not being followed in that way anymore, if that makes sense. She only found my account vecause I was dumb enough to reuse a handle I had on Snapchat years ago that she still had added on one of hers apparently

I've made a lot of friends both online and offline and I'd like to keep them all :) thats why I want to "warn" people that I'm moving blogs so they know I'm still gonna be around and I'm not disappearing for good!

I originally wasn't even going to say anything at all but I remembered how many times I've had anons (like yourself) reach out to me and I realized, since I am kind of a known presence to some people, since I HAVE had this blog for like close to a decade, and since I'm still gonna be writing anyways, I wanted to let people know so we can all continue to have wacky goofy fun. Also having a lot of followers means nothing if they never send asks or interact or reblog so obviously I dont want

I'm still filled with plenty of ideas for hazbin and honestly I hate hate hate how many posts I was cooking with are gonna get deleted 😫 I may just have time remix and repost some things iykwim? I've had some many good posts that weren't fics and I should maybe save some of my "greatest hits"

But yeah, thanks so much for reaching out, it's honestly people like you that kept me from just suddenly disappearing without warning (which was something I considered for safety but I realized it doesnt make much of a difference just letting you guys know)

This is really just to ensure certain people I'm related to arent still following me and won't continue to pry into my business for malicious purposes. I don't have shame about what I post but that doesnt mean im not made uncomfortable that it's still known and accessible to someone who i know will screenshot it and share it to try and make things harder for me. Simply deleting my blogs and remaking is enough to fix that problem.

There's so much I'm learning to do and create and share, and I'm also making lots of new friends and getting to do new things, and I want to be able to share all of that with you guys :) once I remake my blogs, I'll be able to better set up a masterlist and have things better organized as well! Also. To put it bluntly I'm getting back on Prozac so I'm hoping that'll help the numbness and lack of will issues I've been having to help me better get back into my former groove

Unfortunately all of this means deletion is a necessity :( the official fics i plan on hopefully reuploading but, copying all my different prompts and ideas from all the years I've had is way too tall an order. There are certain ideas I can maybe repost but, we'll just have to accept that some posts are gonna go kaput

I just wanted to give people an official heads up that if I suddenly vanish in the next week or two, just look in the tags and fandoms I usually use ;) i AM going back to working two jobs soon but! I'm actually really excited because the new part time job is through/with a friend and it's something I like! It could really branch out into some cool fun stuff! It's also a higher hourly wage than where I'm currently at, but I do plan on just doing both jobs

I've got a screen display drawing tablet now too so I hope to get back into making art! I used to draw all the time when I was younger and it'd be fun to make comics and :) other stuff :) i also want to learn 3d modeling/sculpting and there's plenty of affordable 3d printers! I think i have the creative heart and the friend network to get a side hustle going and make some extra money!

Anyways... yeah! I have so much i want to write and draw and sew and sculpt and hey, maybe someday even animate, but for now, continuing my little goofy writing hobby means I gotta set up a new shop! Feel free to reach out and let me know you'd like to continue following me and I can add you to the lil list i have of people to reach out for, and otherwise, people who consume the content I produce will have no trouble finding me

I also just wanted to go ahead and bite the bullet because... knowing I want to remake is actively holding me back from new posts since I don't want to post new stuff that's just going to be deleted when I can just save it for the next blog. I've still been getting plenty of ideas for Invincible, and there are still older fandoms like DC/Justice League/Batman, and I've also had my eye on Qifrey from Witch Hat Atelier 👀

So... yeah! Gonna give it a few more days to look through my drafts for anything I want to keep or things like that and, I have backups of everything on my ao3 so. It sucks to lose a blog I spent so long building up but I'll still be around! This is for my own safety and benefit and I'm sure you all understand

If the world is about to get really depressing and scary, between all the outbreaks and Super El Niño and war aftermath, I'll be wanting to create and share my stuff more than ever, so... yeah! Fingers crossed my antidepressants start working soon and I'll get back into the groove of things!

People are going out of their way to aggressively destroy products that aren't corposlop and also manufacturing an environment where small creators or indie creators cant produce ANYTHING without it either being ruined or people constantly being harassed over shit that genuinely doesnt matter, and this is appearing at the same time The Powers That Be want everything to be an electronic subscription economy where none of us own everything and they also want one of those things we have to rent literally being computers themselves. These people are acquiring physical media to digitize it and then destroy the physical copies so they can sell licenses to view them to you.

People even fucking spoiled AVATAR and then you find out they were having a zionist voice Aang and to have HIM out of anyone on the show voiced like that feels incredibly intentional and sinister

We have a frontrunner for The Boys openly admitting he's kidnapped Palestinians while serving in the IDF but hey no big boycott or hubba hubba for that unlike people pissing and moaning that the cartoon they like didnt have the children they wanted to kiss end up getting married

Anissa: but Grand Regent, why has your attitude towards the earthlings changed? Why do you suddenly seek coexistence?

Thragg, in denial that he just spent the last two weeks cracking a thick bitch with tummy rolls and getting emotionally attached because he saved her from an alien and she let him crash at her place for cover and the whole entire time was constantly feeding him home-cooked plates and making him cum so hard he nearly went blind:

America is a country fundamentally founded on structural and systemic inequality. There is no voting out of this. We are genuinely heading for civil war and that's on top of what is hopefully not going to be a hantavirus pandemic and the fact we're in a recession going on a depression

Maybe art and creating will become one of the only joys I'll have. I got a sewing machine a while back and im starting to try and learn tailoring stuff. I want to draw more. I want to publish again. I want to learn coding and make all kinds of different things. I got a cricut and a heat press and I just wanna make little stickers and shirts and maybe hawk some shit to friends and vendors. I wanna paint. I want to learn 3d sculpting and animating and 3d printing. There's so much I want to do

I have friends I've made who are wonderful to me and I care a lot for but I wonder how far that will stretch me when no one has any money or jobs if the economy/society collapses?

that's on top of the fact they're already quite literally openly and constantly targeting trans women and other minorities

Now there's going to age verification mass info gathering Epstein class shit?

Is it just me or is the author a falsely-advertising FRAUD for making this male lead, i shit you not

an 18 year old boy who just happens to have a lot of facial hair

Lex who initially has no problem with letting you work until he sees how hard and how many hours you have to work just to pay simple bills, quite literally not being able to afford spending much time with him and still not being able to afford certain little luxuries and treats for yourself

Billionaire-going-on-trillionaire Lex Luthor slowly going insane as he has to wait for you to get home from your menial tedious bitchwork job only to receive a text that you're being forced to work a double because someone else called out and if you're not a team player you'll lose your job and wont be able to pay rent

Luthor slowly formulating some sort of plan to help you as he watches you wear your body down because, ope! You don't have any sick days at this job :) as someone who obsessively adores you, it's inconceivable, bordering on a crime against humanity in his eyes if you ever have to go to work after throwing up or anything like that. Meanwhile he's like paying mercenaries to do some shit like strip-mine a village in Africa using slave labor and couldn't give less of a fuck if a tunnel collapses on some kids sent into the dark to harvest mica

He accompanies you to an urgent care visit because you have some injury or illness and he's all but turning beet red watching the doctor tell you you have something menial like anxiety and afterwards he's looking over the bill for the visit while you cry (because they didn't even help and now you're even more fucking broke)

Having this genius man literally sit down and go over all your budgeting and expenses and realizing you are genuinely doing everything you can and then some and it's STILL not enough. Sitting there with all his intellect and running the numbers and he KNOWS you're basically trapped so deep in poverty you'll never make it out

Just this sort of back and forth where this electrical box i pass daily is getting added to, not beautiful in like the malice portion but like the spirit of the trans artist to persevere and all that

and for a while I was wondering if this was our local cat faced graffiti artist and sure enough, on my way to work tonight--

To people living outside of America: there has been an extremely fast and loudly growing sentiment in America of civilians declaring, basically, "hold people in the epstein files accountable and give us affordable housing/healthcare and divest from the illegal apartheid settlement of Israel or we will vote for people who will. We will vote for politicians who actually want to help us"

and the Epstein deep state responded to this by America's highest court overturning a critical fundamental piece of legislation that gave Americans more equal voting rights and protected them from gerrymandering and explicitly racist voter discrimination, literally called The Voting Rights Act

I am literally getting fucking scared to live here and then they're openly talking about "pre crime databases" and tbh i believe sites like Tumblr are going to be complicit and active accomplices in helping accumulate this kind of data