A very tired student is trying their best. @waytootiredstudent - Tumblr Blog

Lesser-known waifu: not Calvin's mom

The whole story is really cute btw ^w^

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when i say the symbolism in my life is currently heavy handed i am talking about how 'driving towards a difficult decision' is accomponied by thunder and ligthning and driving away from it while having slight doubts about said decision i am driving out of the tunnel and towards three (3!!!) rainbows with music randomly playing 'never again am i coming back!'

#there are more ridiclious details to this but i fear i gotta vague post #friend who i told about this/lived through part of this just started cackling until they were out of breath when told about the rainbows #listen i know you see what you wanna see but sincerely the amount of things that are currently happening is like.#I GOT IT OK. I GOT THE MESSAGE.#I AM DOING THE THING YOU CAN STOP NOW I GOT IT I GOT IT I GOT IT #anyway. in the words of my therapist 'your life does currently sound a bit like a soap opera' (contemplative)#and if that's true can someone get this scriptwriter please a better editor #and possibly convince them that it's time for a beach episode #i think i earned a beach episode #but first! I gotta write most of my bachelor thesis in a week #*disappears again from the face of the earth*

robotslenderman

Source

tributary

teetotailer

judygemstone

first incidence of good writing advice i've seen in 10+ years on this platform and it's in the notes of a mustelid wreaking absolute havoc in a german grocery store

scavengedluxury

*record scratch*

*freeze frame*

"Ja, das bin ich. Sie fragen sich wahrscheinlich, wie ich hierher gekommen bin".

hyrude

i've searched every combination of words imaginable and i still can't find that gif of the german star trek parody where gay spock is quickly drinking coffee and smoking freaking out PLEASE send it to me i need it urgently

lamphous

matched set

homeofhousechickens

"Whats your favorite bird?" "Oh, chickens" "Those aren't birds haha" ??????????????????????????????????????

chick-it-out

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parkchanwoohoo

strictlyfavorites

Wood chopping competition in Austrailia

jahaliel

Tree-felling is my favourite of all the woodchopping events. Every year I go to the local Show (like a state fair i guess?) and they have woodchopping and sawing competitions. (look i'm bi i appreciate the ladies sawing competition XD) but there is NOTHING like watching tree felling. and the competition at the Show is handicapped - so you have a delay based on how well you did in the trials. usually this is around 2-30 seconds and the commentator will say each number and people will start when their is called. (In this video it seems like everyone starts at once) I remember there was an older guy one year. I don't know how old - but he was weathered and grey haired and seemed like he had at least a couple decades on all the other competitors. (also might have been another competitors dad? this happens a lot) his handicap? over 80 seconds. You see how FAST these people are moving in the video? Most of this guys competitors were already working on their second ladder (past 50% of the way through the race) before he started. he came second. and only by like 3-4 chops. no movement was wasted, every ax-strike was precise, he was steady on his feet and the crowd was SCREAMING for it. anyway, i love this sport so much. def on the list of things to do with friends if you visit at the right time of year to see it

usamirenko

nourishes it

keeps it warm

fills it with love

fills it with rice

refills sanity bar

grants it a blessing

athelind

The Most Tumblr Punchline

I've noted before that my favorite punchline on Tumblr is "hang on, gotta look something up/okay that's funny."

Let me explain why:

It is a way to say "I don't get it" without blaming the joke or the teller.

It is a tacit admission of ignorance without shame or judgement.

It assumes responsibility for acquiring the knowledge the respondent doesn't already have.

It cues other people who Don't Get It to do the look-up themselves, allowing them to get that full impact of Getting It without derailing the post with explanations.

It gives subsequent readers, whether or not THEY got the joke, a little frisson of good feelings when they realize that someone else is now In On The Joke.

It not only makes the original joke funnier, it gets funnier the more often it's used.

embervoices

This, and You Are One Of Today's Lucky 10,000 are very much things I love about Tumblr culture, yes!

scumtrout

Sometimes I just look at this photo of when people had to enjoy the local canal (not optional).

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robotslenderman

Source

tributary

teetotailer

judygemstone

first incidence of good writing advice i've seen in 10+ years on this platform and it's in the notes of a mustelid wreaking absolute havoc in a german grocery store

scavengedluxury

*record scratch*

*freeze frame*

"Ja, das bin ich. Sie fragen sich wahrscheinlich, wie ich hierher gekommen bin".

sergle

this is the thing I was talking about where people are playing with their cats the way that cats play with eachother lmao

drtanner

HE KILLED HIM

catasters

sighinastorm

Amazing photograph taken in the fraction of a second where the target doesn’t even know he’s being tackled yet. Idiot.

noodles-07

asking for praise for a thing you made feels so humiliating like oooh look at me I’m a little animal and I did a trick and made a thing can I have pets and treats about it. and then somebody tells you it’s good and you understand why golden retrievers are the way they are

carloskaplan

Alexey Kondakov

absolutelynotanidiot

Surrealistic Documentary Photography

The Artists page :) He has a store page on his website as well, including a cv for the case you’re not sure wether these are AI

Really cool stuff

Also his Instagram below

151K Followers, 1,115 Following, 391 Posts - See Instagram photos and videos from Alexey Kondakov (@alksko)

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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lets-talk-about-sects

Okay kids buckle up for the INSANE story I just heard from my little brother

lets-talk-about-sects

**As a disclaimer my brother is a cis straight dude who only dates the most basic white girls you can find. He's very emotionally aware but doesn't linger on his emotions, just processes them and moves on (this is wild to me)**

He calls me on my break just to say hi, that he’s driving back to Denver from visiting his girlfriend, to which I respond “didn’t you break up with your girlfriend (of like a month) last month” and to which he says “yeah I have a new girlfriend, we’ve been together four weeks but I went up to spend the weekend and meet her friends” and I’m like ok great this is already ridiculous

lets-talk-about-sects

So we’re chatting and I’m teasing him about how he doesn’t sleep with people on first dates and he says that he’s changed his policy, it’s just that he won’t have sex with them if he’d rather be doing something else, so I joke that I’ve had that where I’d rather be watching the show Chernobyl (true) and he says “yeah or watching a movie with my housemate” and I say hey bud that’s kind of gay and he says yeah I actually had a weird gay moment last night

And I go oh???? And he goes yeah, I was at the bar with the girlfriend and some of her friends and one of them was a guy and we were hitting it off, doing a little flirting as you do with your bros at the bar~

lets-talk-about-sects

And then my cis straight brother goes on to explain that sometimes when you’re out with the homies and you’re having a good time and the vibes are right you just give em a little kiss, like just a kiss on the mouth between bros, “no tongue or anything like that but just to express that you’re close and having a good time”

I’m like “My dude that’s not a thing” and he’s like “between confident straight men it is” and I’m like “NO IT’S NOT"

lets-talk-about-sects

So there we’ve got my brother having casual queerplatonic relationships with his homies at the bar, and he’s telling me this and I’m obviously speechless, so he goes on and he’s like “so because this guy and I were hitting it off I go in for a little kiss and he fucking swerves me” and I’m like yes my guy but because my brother is actually very good with respecting boundaries he was like “ok man great communication, won’t do it again"

BUT

Apparently my brother and the dude and my brother's GIRLFRIEND who has been there the WHOLE TIME go outside (I assume to have a cigarette but he didn’t tell me that part) and the guy turns to my brother and is like “man I should have kissed you when you offered it” and my brother is like “cool good shit man” like in the most bro way possible and then the guy grabs his face between his hands and just PLANTS a big one on his mouth

And THEN the guy panics and shoves him down on the ground!! And my brother has the normal reaction to being shoved on the ground unexpectedly which is to say “what the FUCK” and the girlfriend says “what the FUCK” and the guy goes “what the FUCK” and leaves

lets-talk-about-sects

And my brother ended the story there and was musing on it like "this guy obviously has some complexes to work through about his sexuality, no confident straight man kisses another confident straight man and then panics and runs away”

Which took me out at the KNEES lol

lets-talk-about-sects

And that, dear readers, is the batshit story my brother told me!

lets-talk-about-sects

OH MY GOD AND

AND

I told my coworker this and they were like I’m actually shipping him and his roommate and I was like HUH because I hadn't considered that and then later my brother sent me a photo of his housemate wearing sexy handcuffs

lets-talk-about-sects

nice

tocif

i just wanted you guys to know theres a porn parody of the force awakens and just when this storm trooper dude starts feeling this bitch up, kylo came in and started doing his usual tantrum shit in the background unprovoked, meanwhile oblivious to all thats happening and let me tell you no porn has ever cut me so off guard and brought me to tears in .01 seconds until now

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A very tired student is trying their best.