wallflower

“Oh really? And is it - are you happy?” Adelaide couldn’t stop the question that came to her first, just knowing that there was another submissive who had joined the family in that same way she was potentially about to. She didn’t doubt they were welcoming, not with the people she had already met. But she was more worried about what the future would hold for after. She couldn’t stop herself from brightening slightly at the question. “Only Carlo, but he’s become such a good friend already! We share a love of books and we have such wonderful conversations.”

That was a loaded question, and Mae hesitated before she could give an answer. “Our situations are very different,” she finally said, having decided it was both the most accurate and the most diplomatic. “I didn’t meet Wolfgang until just days before our ceremony, and it seems like you and Rafe already know each other. But I’m not unhappy.” And that was true; it wasn’t the blissful life she had hoped for, but most of her problems were of her own making. Adelaide didn’t seem like she would make the same sort of mistakes that Mae had. “There a lot of really nice people in the family,” she said, smiling, although her experience was rather . . . limited.

There was no way to get around a question like that. And since they were supposedly moving in together soon, she needed to be better about being honest. “Oh well. Our families actually arranged a claim for us, so its more that our respective parents knew each other. But he seems kind, so I’m sure it will be fine.”

It was, perhaps, an embarrassing or foolish reaction, but Mae felt both relieved and very happy that she wouldn’t be the only person in a fairly new, arranged claim. It made her feel like less of a freak. “Oh - my claim was arranged too! I didn’t even meet Wolfgang until a few days before the ceremony,” she said, dropping her voice a little. “The family is really very welcoming.” As long as you don’t break the rules, but Adelaide seemed like the sort of person who could very easily follow all the Romano family guidelines. “Have you met many of the other Romanos?”

“I know you’re trying. And, hey, if you don’t wanna do all that girly shit, you can always come hang out with me and help me work on my truck,” Mateo offered, giving her a grin. “Just, y’know - take your time but don’t give up. That’s the worst thing you could do.”

“You might not want me to work on your truck,” Mae said, laughing quietly. “I might ruin it.” At the moment, that seemed a lot more pleasant than spending more time trying to make friends with the other Romanos, but she knew Mateo was right. “I won’t, I promise. I just hope that it’ll pay off sooner rather than later.”

“I hope you’re doing that memorising at night because I know for sure that is one thing guaranteed to put you to sleep no matter how not-tired you are when you start,” Alessia continued the playfulness, it was good to air her opinions in this more humorous way rather than the alternatives which could get her in hot water.  “Skip the section about the anatomy of the grape though and just enjoy the wine instead.”  The Domme nodded encouragingly.  “If you like reading or researching things I can get you a guest pass to the university library if you like?  Or you could even start a course of study, the university here has far more courses and adaptive learning schedules than the one in Ragusa… and I’ll stop there before I sound like a billboard.”  Another understanding smile graced her features.  “I don’t think there would be an issue with you working, it would play well into the whole integration drive Silvius is currently droning on… sorry, encouraging everyone to do.”  She grinned mischievously to show her slip up hadn’t been accidental.  “Do you have any idea what you might like to do?”  She poured an Alessia measure of wine into a glass, meaning it was a very large glass and it was very full and then topped up her own before handing Mae’s over and leading her to the living room to sit somewhere more comfortable.  “It’s weird actually, I’m currently in one of those I’m busy and have no time to do anything but also have no idea what is actually taking all my time phases.  I’m sure every clock is just set to run faster.  How about you sweetheart, how’s life on the Estate?”

“Well, you know you got me as a friend,” Mateo offered, seeing the uncertain look still on her face. “I just don’t know how much help I can be with, y’know, girl stuff… but I’m your friend.” He knew how hard it was to fit in with the family. He couldn’t imagine trying to do it while in an arranged claim. “And, y’know, Georgie and Celia ain’t so bad. A little spoiled, but you get used to them.”

“I know, and I’m very glad for that.” If it weren’t for Mateo, Mae was pretty sure she would become a hermit now. And she never minded spending time with Georgie or Celia. “They just remind me of my sisters. And I love my sisters so much but I don’t always relate to them well, or connect with them. But I’m trying.” She felt like she said that on a daily basis, but it was true. Things had been simpler before, when she kept to herself and hadn’t made many waves - but then she tried to branch out and make friends and things just spiraled very badly.

There was something about the way she phrased the question that made it a little easier to answer. Plus it was nice to have someone else introduce themselves first so she felt a little bit more grounded. “It’s nice to meet you Mae, I’m Adelaide. I came with Rafe tonight.” 

Mae didn’t know Rafe very well - actually, she wasn’t sure she’d be able to pick him out of the crowd tonight, but it was better than moping about her own issues. “It’s lovely to meet you too. How do you and Rafe know each other?” She wasn’t involved in the family gossip, really, though she was quite sure she would have heard anything important.

Mateo smiled as he felt his face heating up. He knew he was lucky as hell and no doubt Mae was now thinking so too. On paper, they didn’t exactly belong together.

“You ain’t got to be nervous,” he assured her. “She’s really… she’s down to earth. Kind. She’s a Capulet as well so you ain’t gonna get a hard time about it from the family. I know how hard it is to fit in with the Romanos, so she could be another friend for you, y’know? Someone to go with you to get nails and hair done.”

It was easy for him to say that she didn’t have to be nervous. He knew Elle and was obviously very happy with her. Mae didn’t have much confidence that she would fit in well with Elle but there was no need to get into that with Mateo. “Well, I guess that’s one thing I can do right,” she muttered. She couldn’t even pick the right sort of friends. 

But he had a point; it would be nice to have someone who wasn’t a Romano - and who wouldn’t get her into trouble - to do things with. She’d never been much for manicures but maybe shopping or even just getting lunch. “I’m still not sure,” she said, but smiling, “but a friend would be really nice.”

“It’s ok sweetheart, no harm done.  I imagine you’re still on a steep learning curve being thrown into the family and then moved all the way up here so quickly so I get why you might be a bit antsy,” Alessia said with a kind smile.  “Not all of us are dinosaurs who can recite the Romano rule book from cover to cover… just most of us,” she joked.  Alessia was certainly proud to be a Romano but she had also had her fair share of disagreements regarding the way things were done.  “Being cooped up isn’t good for anyone so make sure you do get out once in a while, maybe you could find a hobby that makes you get out and about?”  A very knowing look crossed Alessia’s features and she nodded in agreement.  “I know exactly what you mean, for a little while I had a security team assigned to me to make sure I didn’t do anything really stupid… I had a habit of doing stupid things at the time, so I understood why but I still resented the fact they were there.”  She turned to face Mae with an open bottle of wine in one hand and coffee in the other.  “I’m on the wine but what are you in the mood for?”

“I can still go find Wolfgang for you,” Mateo offered again. But he knew him going to get the dominant wasn’t the same as him knowing to come on his own. That was the problem with arranged claims - you knew nothing and cared nothing for the person you were stuck with.

“Her name’s Elle. She’s the domme in the whiteish, lacy cut-out dress with the mask that has all the diamond things on it,” Mateo described, knowing her description should be memorable enough. Elle had certainly turned many heads since stepping into the main hall. “You can come meet her if you want. She’s perfect, Mae… she really is. And I know she wouldn’t mind keeping you company if you feel like you oughta stay a while longer.”

As tempting as the offer was, Mae shook her head. Mateo didn’t need a front row seat to her relationship drama, and she didn’t know if she wanted Wolfgang to see her in this state. Even if he wouldn’t recognize it as a state. “Thank you, but I can go find him myself.” If she wanted to. At the moment, she thought it would be a lot more interesting to meet Mateo’s domme than go in search of her own dominant. 

“Oh - she’s your domme?” Mae had seen the domme come in. She didn’t think anyone could have missed her. “Wow. Well now I’m a little nervous to meet her so maybe not.”

Mateo understood completely what Mae meant. It wasn’t so long ago that he felt like he got in trouble just by breathing. “It gets better,” he offered, his voice small. He didn’t fully believe what he said - it’d taken his whole life to get the little comfort he now enjoyed. 

“Little of both… mostly working, but my domme is here and when I start looking sorry for myself she’s been coming around to fuss over me,” Mateo replied, unable to help a little smile from forming on his face. “So it ain’t all so bad.”

Mae almost questioned him; the idea that things got better was so nice but at the moment, she couldn’t see how it would be true. There were things that might make it easier - like if she had a baby, or if she and Wolfgang could make things work. But she just didn’t know if she believed that life as a Romano would get better. 

“I’m glad that she’s here to cheer you up,” Mae said. Truthfully, she was a little jealous that Mateo had someone to look after him like that. Wolfgang didn’t even know if she was upset unless she was crying. “Who is she? I don’t think I’ve met her and I want to.”

Mateo shrugged. “I don’t think it’d be a big deal if you did. The main hall is busy. Lord Silvius ain’t gonna miss you and I’m sure Wolfgang’s doing his own socializing.” He gave the other sub a small smile, grateful that he hadn’t been forced into a similar arrangement. He wasn’t sure how things were between Wolfgang and her, but he knew his domme would likely already have his mother on the phone if he looked half as homesick as Mae did. “I can cover for you too, if anything is said. I can tell them you had a problem with your dress.”

“Every time I’ve done something that seemed like it wasn’t a big deal, I’ve gotten into trouble.” Mae tried to laugh it off, although it never seemed very funny in the moment. Leaving the party was appealing but her worries about upsetting Lord Silvius or one of the other Romanos outweighed the desire to leave. “It’s nothing anyway. Are you able to enjoy the party or are you too busy working?”

“I’m sorry…” Mateo said softly, wishing he could do something to help her our. Mae had always been a friend to him. “I can try to find Wolfgang for you, if you want,” he offered. “Maybe you can sneak off and give your folks a call? Just to hear their voice.”

“I’m just complaining,” Mae said dismissively; her mother had always made it clear that she needed to handle her problems without whining about them. “I probably shouldn’t sneak off to call them but I’d really like to. I didn’t think I’d miss them so much.” The offer to look for Wolfgang was also tempting but Mae didn’t know if it would help or not. If he wanted to be away from her, she didn’t want to bother him.

Alessia raised both hands as if surrendering, she had clearly touched a nerve based on the bite behind Mae’s words and she reminded herself that the girl was still adapting to the Romano way of doing things.  “I wasn’t checking up on you sweetheart so no, I don’t want to see it.  After everything that’s happened recently I’m just surprised anyone is venturing out anywhere.  I do appreciate the visit though.”  She smiled kindly and motioned for Mae to follow her to the kitchen.  “They can certainly make you feel claustrophobic at times but if they’re good at their job you should barely notice them.  If they’re crowding too much you should tell them so they know and they’ll adapt for you.”  She sighed.  “It’s the feeling of constantly being watched isn’t it?”  There was understanding behind both her words and her smile.  “Would you like a drink?”

At the woman’s words, Adelaide felt a certain kinship with her. She too had lost the dominant who was supposed to get her through the evening and she wasn’t sure what she was supposed to do now. “It’s all right. It’s hard to find anyone in this masked crowd, even if you know exactly which mask you’re looking for. I was sort of hoping my escort would find me if I stayed still, but I think he got wrapped up in other things.”

Mae was not the most outgoing of people, but she thought she understood very well what the other girl felt at the moment. Even having been here with the Romanos for close to a year, she didn’t like being left alone at an event. Not that being with Wolfgang was much better, because it was still awkward, but she found it a little easier. “Who did you come with? I can help you look for him if you’d like. I’m Mae.”

Rafe had just walked away to get a drink? Talk to a family member? He had told her, but she was so overwhelmed by the atmosphere that she hadn’t really processed exactly what he had said. All she knew was that there were so many strangers here, and with the masks she couldn’t even tell if she did recognize anyone. This was her first time meeting the Romanos, and she had not thought it would be like this. Carlo introducing her to his family because they were friends? Sure. Rafe introducing her to his family as an arranged claim? Borderline panic inducing. She stood awkwardly at the side of the room, not sure what she should do. She was so wrapped up in her thoughts, when someone came up next to her and spoke she jumped. “I’m sorry?”

Mae had lost sight of Wolfgang; they’d split up so she could check her messages and he had said something about getting drinks, but when she came back, he was nowhere in sight. She made her way through the crowd careful - mindful of both her own dress and the difficulty walking, and the fact that almost everyone else was not paying attention. “Where did he go?” The question would have gone unnoticed by almost anyone else, she assumed, and she was startled when the other girl spoke in turn. “Oh - no, I’m sorry, I was just looking for my dominant. He’s disappeared.”