this was uncharted territory for collan . it was a mess and a half if he were being honest . she was backing him into an emotional corner that he wasn’t ready nor was he prepared to enter . he knew better than this . knew better than to get caught up in this again . though , when she kisses him , he can’t help but close his eyes . “ alright . one night . then we’re going to have to figure something else that will work for the both of us . ”

nodding her head, she sighed softly and removed her jacket. they were doing all of the things you shouldn’t do when you’re trying to co-parent, she was slightly disappointed in herself even making a move like this, but it was something about him she couldn’t shake, “mhm, but for now.” her soft voice trailed off as she stood up, her hands leading him to the his bedroom, “i missed your bed. not in the sexual way, but in the, it always supported every part of my body way.” she joked, releasing him from her hold as she crawled onto the mattress. “you wanna talk about how nervous you are or are we gonna keep pretending like we have this covered?” though she knew this night could go several ways, she didn’t want to be the one to initiate it.

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      “ mmm . ” he states , remembering just how that went . collan can’t breathe without someone being his mystery girl . it was tiring at this point . “ blair , doesn’t matter why you left me . you did , and that’s that . i’m not going to cry over it . your reasoning isn’t going to change anything . ” while he was tense , he immediately loosens up when she places his hand on her stomach . this was something he wasn’t ready for . wasn’t exactly sure he was going to be a good dad , considering the only person he enjoyed taking care of was georgia . “ and we will get through this without arguing but boundaries are going to have to be placed . if you didn’t want to share me , you shouldn’t have walked away . that’s not a call you can make anymore . just like i wouldn’t be able to do that to you . ”

“i don’t know how many times i have to say that i—“ digressing, blair nodded her head at his admission, she mustered a small smile. he had this wonder on his face, the same look she had when she found out. being a mother was on her list of things to do one day, but being with the person she was having the child with was also on her list. her plans were obviously not unfolding the way she had wanted, but she was trying and that was half the battle. “collan, i don’t want to share you with anyone but this baby if we’re being honest. it isn’t my place but,” before she knew it her hands fell to either side of his face to pull them into each other gently. she kissed his lips for a few moments, resting her forehead against his, “just for one night, can we please just go back to the old us. one night, i need it.” 

      “ i’m just simply saying what you read , isn’t my fault . i can meet a woman in a starbucks line and have a conversation and people are going to think she’s my girlfriend . i’m not going to explain myself to you every time you see some shit you don’t like . ––- though it must make you feel better , since you brought it up . you like waving the fact that you left me in my face every chance you get . i’m not going to keep this argument going . ” rubbing at his temples , collan sighs . “ i’m literally not sleeping with anyone else . no one . i’ve been celibate since you told me you were pregnant . ”

rubbing her hand over the small bump she carried blair realized that this conversation would end just like so many had. “you’re right, when they brought you into the ER after thinking you were hurt and caught us together when I was just checking your vitals, suddenly I was your girlfriend. until, I actually did become it.” blair found herself snickering at the thought of how they met, but the laughter ceased quickly, “I left you before you could break my heart.” she mumbled, twisting her hair around her fingertips she glanced up at him. “seriously? scared you might get someone else pregnant?” moving to sit beside him, she rested his hand on her stomach. “i want us to try and do this without arguing, the baby deserves that much. i guess i’m still not ready to share you.”

      doesn’t get why he’s going through this . thought that two people calling it quits meant that these comments didn’t come back up . “ yeah , but me being the father of our child doesn’t have shit to do with who i’m dating or who i might be dating . ” he states , simply . eyes roll , “ you’re literally the only person that’s keeping count of our break ups . i didn’t lose sleep over them . so if it makes you feel better knowing you’re the one who walked away , then so be it . ”

scoffing softly at his statement blair pushed her hair out of her face and leaned her head to the side to gauge his expression, “two seconds ago, you were at my throat about how i should mind my own. now you have a heart again? no, it doesn’t make me feel better. i thought we’d be doing this differently, yet here we are. i’m just asking because if i get horny, you’re my only option and it would make things easier if i could continue to be with you rather than you being with all of new york.” huffing she shook her head, “i didn’t mean that, i am sorry.”

      “ this conversation is pretty much useless . we’re not in a relationship so confronting me about what you’re reading in the tabloids is just wasting time . it doesn’t mean anything . ”

the sound of the condescending tone that dripped from his lips, blair scratched her nail against her temple. queasiness overcame caramel features, holding her hand up as he spoke she shook her head, “you’re making me sick, seriously.” the dark-haired woman admitted as she regained her composure, “you’re right we aren’t, the moment we called it quits two months ago, it stopped being my business— then you came over drunk and what did we do? had sex all over my place—unprotected. making sure that the father of my child—” inhaling sharply, blair rose to her feet and held her hands up. “i am not here to tell you who you can and can’t fuck, i’m asking that if this is a real thing for you? respect me enough to tell me that. oh, and by the way? let’s not pretend like you were the person who left me. ”

Rose couldn’t stop the scoff that fell from her lips as she insisted she wasn’t writing off her issues. But she didn’t get a chance to say much else before Sevyn mentioned Rose wasn’t a good listener. She frowned in disbelief as she continued to speak. “To move past it when need to talk about it, Sevyn,” she insisted. “It’s the only way. Sex isn’t going to fix this. And you know it.” She was silent for a moment before she asked: “You’re not really prepared to throw away the past two years just because you can’t fix it with sex?” 

Sevyn found herself growing frustrated because she was such a non-confrontational person, these conversations never went over well because she simply didn’t how to say what she meant without hurting her opposite or herself. “I love you, remember that through all of this.. I love you and I am trying to be the person I was when we met, the evolved version, but the person who spoke their mind as best as they knew how. I don’t want to throw us away, and no I’m not saying I wanna just have sex and be done with this. I am saying that’s when we’re the closest intimacy wise and I am able to just be in the moment without wondering if I am doing the wrong thing or saying the wrong thing. I am sorry that I don’t know how to tell you all the things I want to say, but I just wasn’t raised that way. I hold things in and it’s easier for me, so when you cry or yell at me? I let you. I am unhappy because I know that when we argue or disagree you are really venting and getting it all out and moving on and I can’t even stop fumbling over my own words to say how I feel. So sometimes it’s resentment.” She let out a gust of air as she rambled.

“Seriously? Are you seriously trying to write off your issues opening up on me? And for crying at that,” she frowned. “Seriously, Sevyn. You can’t just refuse to talk to me because I show my emotions.” After a beat, she added: “And weren’t we happy at some point?” 

“I’m not writing off my issues,” cheeks rosey as she shook her head at her opposite, “You don’t listen either, you hear what you want. But you know what always fixes things? Sex. That’s the best way I know how to just be with you, because it’s easier. Not like that—i don’t how to communicate either, clearly.” Sucking her teeth, she stuffed her hands into her back pockets. “We’ve been together for two years, we’ve hit a rough patch. We can move over it or we can go our separate ways.”

“We keep fighting because you never actually want to sit down and talk, Sevyn? How are we supposed to work through our issues and be happy if your first instinct is to leave as soon as you’re not happy?”

“It’s me? Maybe it’s your attitude, or the fact that you make me not want to talk or afraid to say anything. You cry at the drop of a dime and I don’t like to see you hurt, so I just don’t say anything. I am not happy and I haven’t been for some time and it shouldn’t be that way.”

“Wait. Where are you going?” 

“So that we can say what to one another? There’s nothing else left to say, I’m tired of fighting, I just wanna be happy. Here? I’m not.”

“Wait. Where are you going?” 

“I don’t know what else to do! I can’t stay here with you and I can’t go? What am I supposed to do?”

How to lose a guy in 10 days (2003) dir. Donald Petrie

Simone Davis in Star on Fox’s Season 3 Episode 6

Brittany O'Grady as Simone Davis Rivera on Star → 3.06 “Ante Up”