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@vitiaetus
most fun i’ve ever had — and i’d do it OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN if i could. incredibly selective + private SITH obi - wan kenobi of star wars. very low activity , will only interact with mutuals from my main blog. sideblog to @deificio.

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SERENA CARLISLE ,
SERENA LOOKS BEHIND HERSELF AS WELL , as if trying to follow his gaze , but she quickly turns back to him ━━━━ nothing else matters now that he’s here , now that he’s within her reach. ❝ i belong with you , obi - wan. anakin doesn’t need me. ❞
“ he needs you more than you think. ” of this , he is absolutely certain. obi - wan looks at her , reaching for the distance the jedi had taught him between he and those he loves. “ you do not belong here. ”
MAGNOLIA CASTILLO ,
his question strikes her with the realization she doesn’t know what her purpose is now. she was useful when coruscant was shrouded in mystery and war, but now the fog is lifting. she imagines without the chancellor pulling strings they will find peace again. she won’t be needed. and while she never wanted to be a tool for the senate, she doesn’t know what value she has to anyone outside of that role. ❝ don’t know… ❞ she admits. she hadn’t thought far beyond finding him. the uncertainty envelopes her demeanor ❝ just…missed you. ❞
obi - wan’s searching gaze rests on her for a long moment , and then whatever reservations he had had seem to fall away. he steps forward , taking her wrists in his hands. “ if you want to stay with me , then you will , ” he says , whisper - soft. “ but you can’t go back. not to anakin or padme or bail. if they know you have been with me , they will follow you here. they fear what they do not understand , and they will try to kill me. i don’t want to hurt them , but i will.. ”
SERENA CARLISLE ,
𝓢𝑯𝑬 𝑰𝑺 𝑮𝑹𝑨𝑪𝑬 , she is shaking. from her resolve , to the tips of her rose - petal fingers , but she isn’t scared. serena would never be afraid of obi - wan , no matter what he’s become. ❝ no. you should have taken me with you. ❞
“ i did not want to take you with me. ” obi - wan draws a step closer , gaze shifting over her shoulder. has she brought reinforcements , someone to drag him back to coruscant? no. he thinks it unlikely. “ you belong on coruscant. ” in the light , with her friends. “ anakin will be looking. ”
MAGNOLIA CASTILLO ,
her features smooth out when he cups her face, any uncertainty melting away beneath the warmth of his palms. magnolia shakes her head a little. ❝ you’re not, ❞ she insists firmly. her own hands lift to gently curl her fingers over his hands. ❝ i…know. mon—monsters. ❞ and she sees no traces of monstrosity within him now. ❝ they. are. wrong. ❞ she takes a step closer, eyes unwavering as they stare into the golden hue of his own. she doesn’t understand why they could believe such things. he did what needed to be done, did he not? he protected them all from the chancellors twisted games. ❝ they don’t. get it…i do. ❞
she is perhaps the only one who could understand. the jedi mean well , but they are misguided , irrevocably so. it is a rarity for one to break through , to see clearly , to embrace the force in its entirety rather than cling to the light. he is one of the fortunate. “ and what will you do? ”

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Elena Ferrante, from Those Who Leave and Those Who Stay (translated from the Italian by Ann Goldstein)
[Text ID: Ever since I was a child I had constructed for myself a perfect self-repressive mechanism. Not one of my true desires had ever prevailed, I had always found a way of channeling every yearning. Now enough, I said to myself, let it all explode, me first of all.]
» @eidolaes ♡
“ i told you not to follow me. ” he is too still , fingers resting on the hilt at his belt , gaze intent , too sharp. “ perhaps i wasn’t being clear. it was not a request , serena. you must go. ”
MAGNOLIA CASTILLO ,
she has never fully grasped this idea of separation between light and dark. it’s not how she senses the universe. she has never existed in extremes. they all speak as if they have lost him. or like he must be saved from himself. but looking at him now, he still just seems like her ben. his eyes are changed and she misses their vibrant, blue hue. but he has accepted her despite her darkness before. she could accept this if he let her.
magnolia nods a little at his response. his energy is changed, she can’t deny that. he feels a little different. but is that bad a thing? jedi restraint seems suffocating. and he doesn’t appear to be strangled by hatred either. ❛ i don’t care, ❜ she signs dismissively ❛ and i’m not really important enough for anyone to notice i’m gone. not for a while. ❜ there’s bail, but she left a note. and he trusts her, even if she couldn’t tell him the full truth yet ( as much for his own plausible deniability as her knowledge he might’ve stopped her ). ❛ do you…not want me here? ❜
does he want her here? he isn’t sure. for all their flaws , is the best , safest place for her not still within the walls of the temple , with bail? “ i want you to be safe , ” he returns , and , drawing closer , takes her face in his hands. “ i am not safe for you. not anymore. ” were they to come for him again , it would be all too easy for her to be caught in the crossfire. “ does it not trouble you that they believe me to be a monster? that anakin believes as much? ”
— master , i don’t -- i don’t understand how this could have happened , you’re ... what have you done?
— you don’t understand? i have done this for you , anakin. i love you , and i have put you first. is this not what you always wanted?
*Immediately start using newly acquired skill for Evil.*

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MAGNOLIA CASTILLO ,
❛ i’m not here for them, ❜ head shakes as her hands move through the air with an earnestness to be believed. she knows they would all expected her to try and bring him back. but she isn’t here as a tool for the senate or the jedi. they can use her for anything ( she owes them her life after all ) but not this. ❛ i miss you, ❜ lashes flutter as she blinks back tears. he left her. he abandoned her like everyone does and she should be angry. but she isn’t. she is just sad. and she wishes he would have at least said goodbye. ❛ i just wanted to know that you’re okay. ❜ the temple isn’t the same without him there.
were it anyone else , he would not have believed them. but this is mags , and there is nothing to alert him in the force , no alarm bells , no hint of deception -- and most importantly , no other signatures , no indication that someone lies in wait to ambush him.
obi - wan softens , just as he always has and always will for her. “ i feel better than i have in -- a very long time. ” and that much is true , now that his chains have been cast aside. “ they do not know you’re here? that’s just as dangerous for you. if they discover that you’ve been in contact , it doesn’t look good for you. you must realize that. ”
like for a starter.
» @desafia ♡
" you should not have come. ” for once , his near - perfect composure is truly shaken. fingers still tensed around the hilt at his belt , honey - colored gaze too bright in the dim lighting of the dilapidated building. doesn’t she know he could have killed her -- that he still could , were he truly the monster they all believe him to be? “ it was wrong of them to send you to me. ”
through victory , my chains are broken. obi - wan of course did not massacre the jedi , nor does he have any desire to rule the galaxy ; that much didn’t change. he loves the jedi as the only family he’s ever known , but believes himself to be enlightened , whereas they are misguided. to cling to the light is to be caged ; the dark side is freeing. the dark side is suffocating him bit by bit , snuffing out what makes him obi - wan , but he has lost the ability to see that and is entirely under its influence.
he is in hiding because he knows that the jedi will be forced to imprison or slay him. he also knows that anakin would seek to bring him back to the light , and he has no desire to be ‘ chained ’ again. twice , troops have been sent out to bring him back on the orders of the new chancellor , and have been found dead later. these killings are not without remorse , but he believes it’s the only thing he can do.
he has also taken to tracking down those in palpatine’s inner circle and murdering them as well. obi - wan sincerely believes that he is still protecting those he loves.
the day he was to depart for utapau , obi - wan went to the supreme chancellor’s office and murdered him in the name of saving anakin skywalker. no one will ever know just what it was that caused the pieces to fall into place , nor what happened in those final moments between them. before obi - wan disappeared , he was confronted by a devastated anakin , and the only reasoning he offered was this : i love you , and i have put you first. is that not what you’ve always wanted? obi - wan was gone before the council or the guards in the senate complex reached the room , and has remained elusive since. he has cut off his bonds with his padawans entirely.
with the chancellor dead , it required little for his lies and plots to begin unraveling. much of the story remains a mystery , including the details of his end goal , but it was made clear that he had orchestrated the war on both sides.

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