dialogue prompts from hot milk by deborah levy.

if my laptop is broken, so am i.

will you still be here in a month?

they used to film spaghetti westerns here.

i don't have an occupation, so much as i have a preoccupation.

i'm starting to think you want to keep me here.

i want a bigger life.

some things are getting bigger, but not the right things.

may i refer to you as _____?

identity is always difficult to guarantee.

memory is not always reliable.

jesus called his mother 'woman'.

i don't know why i'm so frightened.

i failed my test four times.

can you ride a horse?

i didn't mean to frighten you.

it's not your fault. i was frightened, anyway.

when i look in the mirror, i do not recognize myself.

you are always so far away.

you smell like the ocean. like a starfish.

i picked these flowers for you.

i want to mess up the story i've been told about myself.

my whole life has been about endurance.

my first enemy and adversary is endurance.

let's take twenty minutes for a coffee and a pastry.

where have you got to by trying to please everyone all the time?

it seems like i am always freaking you out.

does that feel nice?

shall i lie with you for a while?

if you want me to go away, why don't you say so?

i need to be bolder.

everyone is a field study to you.

you are getting bolder.

do i look like i am thriving?

i feel completely safe in your hands.

i will have to be your eyes.

have you ever said what you've meant in your life?

i am wounded with desire, and i am ready for the ordeal of love.

one is not born, but rather becomes, a chameleon.

guilt is very disabling.

i have no grip on time anymore.

my own sexuality is an enigma even to me.

i'm not sure what it is that you want for me.

my life isn't enviable. even i don't want it.

i suppose i am boring you. i am bored, too.

i am not okay, not at all, and haven't been for some time.

i'm not sure what the rules are anymore.

i am panging for artisan coffee.

are you anticapitalist?

all greek myths are about unhappy families.

i am freer than i've ever been.

you were only a child.

you look like a popstar.

all you need is a guitar and a band.

you are obsessed with me.

your boundaries are made from sand.

i do know how to keep a secret.

it's unfortunate. you are always here when i am here.

something about you touches me very deeply.

you're my _____. your pains are my pains.

i often fear the future has already happened.

i'm not sure what kind of reality i'm living in right now.

sleep is for happier people.

i'm afraid to sleep.

why are you dead, when you are alive?

we have to mourn our dead, but we cannot let them take over our life.

𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧,       after    all.

❛    …    it's   printed   on   the   label?    ❜    rena   gazes   at   him   in   disbelief.    she   chose   not   to   say   anything   else,    at   least   to   save   his   dignity.    as   she   digs   through   her   bag,    she   pulls   out   a   much   more   people-friendly   treat,    at   least   to   give   him   something   to   eat   if   he   was   hungry.    (    that's   why   he   was   doing   that,    right?    )    ❛    here,    eat   this   maybe?    ❜

     love takes time? okay, true, she isn’t wrong about that, however … in a video game, it should be easier, simpler, not as anger inducing to accomplish just one specific task. is it immature to get so annoyed by a mii not doing what he wants it to do? well, yes. does he care? absolutely not. she’s seen him at his worst, this is nothing in comparison to anything else she’s witnessed in their time spent together.     ❝     she’s liked every mii on my island besides the one i created in my likeness, mind you,     ❞     he’s convinced that if he simply deleted all the miis even that wouldn’t do anything, she would simply never develop a crush.     ❝     i’m going to delete her as punishment, so she can think about what she did before i remake her.     ❞     

     ❝     i was     …     just joking.     m’not     …     gonna fall asleep,     ❞     he is,     they both know he will eventually,     better to do it here,     with her than to do it in the middle of a grocery store aisle because arceus knows he would,     he has no care for human society’s arbitrary rules,     if he’s exhausted he’ll lay on the ground     &͟.     take a nap,     thank you very much!     (     or well,     on his own,     perhaps not when he has rena accompanying him because he doubts she would follow suit     &͟.     do the same.     )     nonetheless he’s exactly where he needs to be,     relishing in the warmth of the living room,     next to her,     with his espeon resting on the opposite side of the couch,     nosy as she is.     (     they’re hardly talking,     he hasn’t a clue what sort of information she’s trying to scope out in the first place.     )

     ❝     m'not tired,     ❞     horrible liar that he is;     the yawn that escapes him right after calls his bluff but he remains adamant,     even though he hasn’t moved an inch,     hasn’t even attempted to open his eyes in order to make his comment sound convincing.     perhaps it would sound like the truth if he actually tried to make it seem possible but he doesn’t budge,     not a semblance of alertness to his name.     he’s practically a minute away from falling asleep,     hell,     even that’s too gracious,     he’s seconds away from that.     ❝     just     …     thirty seconds and we can——     we can get back to baking.     ❞     

her   expression   softens   while   he   makes   himself   comfortable,    her   posture   bending   instinctively to   accommodate   him.    she   fit   around   him   naturally,    almost   as   if   she'd   done   this   over   a   dozen   times   now.    it   doesn't   register   that   she's   smiling   until   much,    much   later.    &    truthfully…    she's   tired,    too.    she'd   drag   herself   out   of   bed   much   earlier   than   normal,    stumbling   through   her   routine,    half-awake,    then   making   the   trip   all   the   way   to   his   apartment   from   a   few   towns   over   had   already   taken   it's   toll   on   her.    

but,    all   of   that   effort   was   worth   it   the   moment   she'd   arrived.    

now   that   they're   cuddled   up,    warm    &    comfortable,    &    safely   hidden   away   from   the   world…    exhaustion   seemed   to   creep   in.    

❛    mmh...    ❜    the   sound   is   little   more   than   a   sleepy   hum.    one   of   her   hands   reaches   for   his   sleeve   absentmindedly,   fingers   curling   loosely   into   the   fabric   as   if   anchoring   herself   there.    if   anything,   she   leans   into   him   a   little   more,   content   to   borrow   his   warmth   for   a   while   longer,   listening   to   the   steady   sounds   of   the   apartment   around   them   and   enjoying   the   rare   comfort   of   just   being   with   him.