the most frustrating thing about Merlin is how different things could have been had Merlin been less afraid of discovery
the solidarity that could have existed between Merlin and Morgana, that was hinted at even in the second episode, would have been so powerful and changed the whole dynamic of the show
but instead the culture of secrecy that surrounded magic that Merlin internalised and lived by forced him to always be defensive, it stopped him opening up when he most needed to
like imagine Merlin and Morgana keeping each other’s secret, working in secret together by candlelight practicing spells, there being not one but two powerful sorcerers keeping Arthur and the kingdom safe, imagine the secret looks that would have passed between the two of them as Arthur boasts about how he took down an entire company of knights and wasn’t it lucky that their cart caught on fire when it did, and imagine when it all got too much, when the secrecy became too much to bear, Merlin goes to Morgana and they talk, and they reassure, yes one day we will be able to come out of the shadows, no Uther’s dogma is not fair or just, one day it will get better, like imagine what a powerful story that would have been about solidarity in the face of bigotry
but instead what we got was one brilliant woman who became twisted by isolation and bigotry, and a sweet man who was never able to reconcile who he was with his place in the world and the fact that we never got to see the other possibility kills me
