I Just Am

You’re in the wrong environment.

Sometimes CSA makes you afraid to touch other women’s bodies because you’re afraid to touch yours because when you do you get flashbacks to the person that touched you without your permission and sometimes the brain isn’t ready to deal with that so you are subconsciously in the closet. Wow. It’s me. I am gay. Like wholely. Not a piece of me. Lmaooo. It’s the whole me. Motherfuckers. Trauma really interrupts your greatness. You gotta peel your whole self back before you realize who you are. I am made to love women so fucking deeply because I love myself. I am my perfect man and woman. And like what if as a civilization that is the blueprint. Why would I not love myself and those in my image? And that should be the same for men and anyone else. It’s okay to be attracted to yourself and love yourself through those who embody what it is you are. Maybe we must start there. Treating our own bodies with kindness and respect. Loving our bodies beyond our reproductive organs. Seeing ourselves as a whole so we may see others wholely too. That’s beautiful to me. I want that. In people.

Please let her be ready to surrogacy our child. 🥲. I want to hold her belly and do the photoshoots. Rub her feet and feed her grapes and crackers. A lil bit of wine is good for the baby. Run her baths. Cool for her. Give her kisses on her face. Drive her places. Remind her of how beautiful her nose is when the baby makes it fat. Just love on her man. Give her the pregnancy I never got. I’ve always been better at treating women well because men have treated me and the women I grew with horribly. Like it’s nothing to me to be a great partner. The only requirements are a heart and brain.

I actually love that for her.

Whoever is here is like the opposite of a straight woman’s relation to liking lesbians. That thing where she can be sexual with a woman but not date or marry one. She can be sexual with a man but to mate or marry probably isn’t going to happen. Sis is waiting for her Queen Pharaoh.