About me

Maddie | 34

“You don’t get to commit sin and then ask all of us to feel sorry for you when they’re consequences.”

Music is not just something I like, it’s something I live through. It runs under my skin, settles in my bones, and shapes the way I experience everything. I’m mostly into heavy music, but I drift through other genres depending on the mood, the moment, the need.

I read the way people breathe. Somehow, that led me to build a small personal library at home (romantasy, dark romance, thrillers, psychology, true crime, science…).

I write because it keeps me sane. I journal, documents my feelings and my emotions, overanalyze things, question everything and I also write smut.

I’m also into gaming, and I’m not bad at it, honestly. And because I’m drawn to art, cinema, and photography, I’m here for the aesthetics, the moods & the quiet kind of inspiration that stays.

I post, reblog, and occasionally overshare. Expect music, art, words, and the occasional NSFW ripple.

If something resonates, you’re welcome to react, just keep it respectful.

DMs are open to mutuals only. I choose them intentionally, the same way I choose the people I keep in my life.

Talk to me if you can hold an actual conversation.

If you’re here for attention, ego-stroking, or nudes: don’t. I’m not here to entertain boredom or whatever parasocial thing you’ve got going on. But if you’re here for real discussions, sharp minds, and genuine laughter, you’re welcome to stay.

Not interested in being your next distraction, thank you.

Also, if I may have your attention:

If you’re under 28, have no profile picture, run an empty blog, or are looking for a sugar baby, keep walking. And if you’re a self-proclaimed “dom” with zero understanding of the role, let’s not waste each other’s time. I don’t babysit egos. Been there, done that, didn’t like the ending.

I don’t send anons. Ever. If I have something to say, I say it directly.

Now, some links it you wanna read the spicy stuff I am writing.

Velvet Devotion

Tactical Surrender

The Chair

Maybe because they're never really about the first time itself.

They're about everything that comes before.

The stolen glances. The lingering touches. The unbearable tension of wondering when it will finally happen.

It's the anticipation that gets you.

The slow realization that you're becoming aware of someone in a way you weren't before. The way every interaction starts carrying a little more weight. The way a simple touch suddenly occupies your thoughts for hours afterward.

And the longer you wait, the more intoxicating it becomes.

Not because you're holding back.

But because desire has time to grow.

To settle beneath your skin. To turn every look into a question. Every touch into a promise. Every moment into something you'll replay long after it's over.

The anticipation. The tension. The unbearable thrill of wanting someone for so long that every little thing starts feeling electric.

When you don’t rush it, everything becomes heightened.

A brush of fingers can feel more intimate than a kiss. A lingering glance across the room can leave your stomach in knots for hours. The space between two bodies suddenly feels alive, charged with everything that hasn’t happened yet.

It’s the way his hand stays on your waist a second too long. The way your breath catches when he leans closer and then doesn’t kiss you. The way desire builds quietly, slowly, until even the smallest touch feels almost devastating.

Because anticipation turns people soft. Careful. Hungry.

You start noticing everything: the tension in his jaw when he looks at you, the hesitation before he touches you, the way his voice changes when the attraction becomes impossible to hide anymore.

And after waiting for so long, after holding back and letting the ache grow instead of satisfying it immediately, every first becomes overwhelming.

The first kiss feels deeper. The first night together feels warmer. The first time he pulls you against him feels like finally giving in to something your bodies have been saying for weeks.

There’s something beautiful about desire that takes its time.