Veiled by Auroras

*(it's what they call "you".)

let's start a chain

everyone reblog with your alterhuman toxic trait

but also my loyalty. when I trust someone, I am loyal to them with blind trust. that often gets me hurt.

I'm a wild animal, but people still touch me, go into my territory, keep me in confined spaces, and try to control me.

Thankfully, I'm moving out soon, so hopefully that part of me will improve. I'm hoping that my own apartment will allow me to be safely territorial. I'm also going to be living by a forest, so the noises of the city hopefully won't contribute to me snapping every few days.

making too many angel jokes and outing myself to almost everyone i meet. If its not the jokes that do it then it either happens when trying to comfort people or when im wearing one of my pins

the urge to claw out(or ruin some other way) every pretransition picture of me(but only the part with me in it) so relatives cant show me off to other people without consent

chewing on my nails even when i have clippers, i use them for my feet but i feel like they should be super short, though that doesnt help with the previously mentioned wishes to claw out stupid paintings

i used to bite when i was younger, i dont do it now and it was only in self defense but that doesnt excuse what i did, im not supposed to be violent.

theres also @archiethepuppyboy s input of feeling like i need to follow people around and help as much as possible, i have trouble relaxing if im trying to rest while knowing someone is waiting on my help so i try to assist them first then constantly bothering people if i can help with something because if i just sit while others are doing things i feel bad. Then i struggle to take care of myself and my own problems

@apollo-of-stars and someone elses take of feeling bad if someone is sick and i cant help them, i feel so useless like i should be able to at least ease their pain somehow, if i dont prevent every single bad thing that happens to loved ones i feel like that specific thing or sometimes everything that person has gone through is entirely my fault, even when i havent done anything to cause it. Then when i know something isnt my fault i still have to take the blame or ill seem too cocky and get yeeted.

whenever mom shows me off in a condescending fashion i have the urge to show off a pair of giant wings(and preferably some extra eyes but i dont think i have them) just to nudge her and tell her not to do that, if she doesnt quit i would make my way outside while knocking some things over and fly tf away until shes done

going “get off my wings!” Out loud when my naughty birds dont want to go into their travel carrier and climb around on my back like im a jungle gym instead

wanting to sing but unfortunately i dont want to do a cutesy, feminine aria or soprano whatever, i want to release a gut wrenching scream while pouring myself into the music to the point where im engulfed by it like a moth to a flame, preferably while shredding my lyre(“thunderstruck” and “make it out alive” are great examples of this). Unfortunately i cant even sing/play quietly in here

the urge to just show up at 3:00am while people are trying to sleep. In angel uniform. Wings out. Halo and eyes glowing. Just to warn them not to do a stupid thing that theyll regret. If they dont listen to me id slap em until they get the picture. im looking at you, put the chat GPT down if you dont quit using it like a search browser ill have to permanently change your phone background to scary clown gore that plays deafening recorder/accordion/kazoo/xylophone circus music for an hour every time you open the app, youll have to pay a professional $10,000 to get your tech fixed and we both know youll spend that money on nasty ass beer instead.

if im not good by a fucking saints standards i feel horrible and dirty like im going to lose wing privileges and my place at home in the stars, any anger or negative emotion feels like a sin, which proves to be a problem when im mad at people for causing harm to others while my protective instincts act up. I want to be peaceful and pure but im hanging on by a thread. I know its horrible and wrong but i want to even the scores just let me shatter the kneecaps of my abuser and yeet hot coffee on my mom’s abusers faces already pleeeaaase.(at least im requesting permission instead of just doing it…)

when standing on a ledge i frequently think about what would happen if i just jumped or fell. Ive never gotten close to it before but i dont want to

Being weirded out by my body in general. It doesnt feel right. Why are my shoulders and hips so wide? Why do i have boobs and a reproductive system? Lord knows i cant be trusted with children He’s seen how i am with them, can i trade these bundles of garbage for wings instead?

i get possessive over my personal space. I dont like people bragging about whatever random thing im doing just to make them look good while following me with a camera at all times, im like a bird and will hang out with you nonstop if i like you but otherwise i prefer you stay out of my business(im much more friendly on tumblr than irl, im usually pretty shy). Ive tackled my cousin repeatedly for always invading my space when calmly explaining to them didnt work, they liked it though so i didnt get my private space back until they went home after a few months of sprawling on my nest and breaking my stuff that i let them borrow

appearing odd and offputting so i weird people out and make relatives look bad, i have normal hair and i just wear tshirt/cargos or sweater vest/jeans with hightop sneakers and a plain gray hoodie so i still dont understand why i always look/feel so out of place

Not toxic but theres wanting to be bioluminescent so my halo/eyes/marks can light the way for people when its dark, i wanna be a nonhuman flashlight

Also not toxic but i frequently find myself wishing i could use my wings as a shelter/blanket when people need it, like when its rainy i can be an umbrella and if youre cold you can get swaddled up in my warm natural burrito

wanting to take that big bundle of my hair that my gene donor displays in his stupid grandfather clock and burn it. I want to set that greasy 10yr old ponytail on fire, along with the nsfw pic my gene donor has of me, all of his legal documentations and his computer full of kiddie porn and burn that too, i could even use some sage to disperse the evil energy coming from it if someone can tell me how sage works.(hes an awful, horrible, rotten man so i want to play it safe and cleanse the flames just in case somethings up)… on that note i should spare his pedo computer and hand it over to the authorities instead but you get my point!

Wanting to be cremated when im gone so nobody can force me into a poofy princess dress and display my corpse like a doll. Ill live up to my (first)name and ill return to the interstellar winds that i came from

preferred weapon is a sword, who does that these days? Im scared i might accidentally shoot myself with a gun, also why do i daydream about attacking ICE agents with it? i shouldnt be like this i need to be peaceful like i previously mentioned

wanting sharper teeth so if i ever do have to bite someone again i can do so effectively so theyre more likely to leave me alone(i also want the ability to spread rabies, i dont want rabies myself but it would give people more incentive to leave me be)

holding grudges and personal beef on people for minor offenses for years, im quick to forgive accidents but if whatever you did was on purpose ill have trouble believing you wont do it again.

ive… thought about pooping on people, on purpose, like some kind of massive coffee addicted pigeon. This isnt a normal thought to have is it?

being kinda picky with foods and being aversive towards eating in general like eeeeewwwwww why do i gotta do this to keep my body running ill get called a pig and this feels weird…

also have daydreamed about having my perfect angelic body and simply streaking in public places if someone were to force me to wear a frilly ballgown once again. Just my squishy buttcheeks, flat chest, and body hair against the transphobes(i would prefer to cover up with wings in this situation, id feel bad for anyone who’d get mentally scarred by me). This is a more common thought than the projectile pooping its bad. At least i know ill never do either of these

considered training my birds to be attack birds so if a certain someone comes into my private space without consent the birds will give me a good headstart to get ready for defense, i just worry one of them might end a life or theyll get hurt from being so small. I should be the one to protect them not the other way around…

wanting to time travel to multiple points in my past in full angel mode undercover as my own guardian to protect that alternate universe version of myself from the abuse and scare the crap out of people while im at it. I want to save myself when no one did.

chased my cousin with a legit sword because they once again invaded my space and stole my favorite hoodie as a joke while they knew that would trigger me. Dont worry my cousin is fine they only suffered a small cut to the wrist but they learned not to steal my raggedy well loved hoodie after that. I still feel bad though even though talking it out wouldnt work. Sometimes i still want to chase people with swords(mostly ICE agents so they dont abduct people though)(thank God im medicated now and can control myself better)(sword was an impulse purchase on ebay, i want to rehome it…)

when not making the previously mentioned horrid noise sometimes i accidentally growl a little when angry and speaking, its gotten better and it hasnt happened for like a year or two but it still haunts me. Why do i do that?

having issues handling gore, for a somewhat violent minded person i sure do get concerned and sad when i see any creature that had to go through that.

aaand thats all i can think of for now, i wish i didnt have so many toxic parts😔🪽

@theonelerofey @fogg-inthe-clouds @ghostofhusbandspast @duskyumbra-indigo-1hundredand1 @empyrean-saudade @endearing-tear @earthbound-angell @seraphimloser @seraphicsam @seraphicdownfall @thereisanangelinyou @thehomohotspot @thelovelynarcissiseraphim @angelic-acceptance

@angelic-epidemic @angel-on-mars @averyamorr

@jnonewsoutlet @veiled-by-auroras @virtuedalit

@vic-fandom @divine-wanderlust-777 @fleshfeathers @falling-from-grace1666 @literally-divine @gildedfeathers @cup-of-fish @crevanthealmosthuman @k9phiel @kur0b6gs

@beepshroom @bleeding-wingsss @nebulabrigade @michaelaissleepy @heraldpdf

-ryoshu (limbus company)

i thought this was a funny idea

(some cuts made for simplicity)

Also while growing up we'd always feel dysphoric about our height, we always felt far too short even though we were pretty simillar in height to everyone else. It felt strange not having to physically look down to see people but again we didn't know why and just assumed it was normal height dysphoria. Another thing that always made us "dysphoric" (im not sure if it counts as dysphoria but it really agitated us) when we had to listen to other people or follow rules and not be the one setting up the rules or being in charge.

Fast forward a bit to like 3 years ago and we find out about the sb fandom (abreviated so that it doesn't show when searching) and we felt instantly connected. Everything felt so familliar in that show but at the time we wern't appart of the otherkin/fictionkin communities and lowk kinda thought they were a bit crazy. I felt homesick for the solar system in that show and i felt like i was missing something.

We related heavy to the sun and earth in that show and they became some of our favorite characters. Like a year or so later we found out that we were otherkin (our first kin was for our winged kin) and then like a few days later we realised "shit we might kin sun and earth from solarballs". First we kinfirmed earth because I think at the time, Andre (one of our headmates) was fronting a lot more often and it took us litteral months of debating and going back and forth to accept that we kinned sun aswell.

I personally have a white, gold and dirty blonde seraphim esq tail to help me steer, but I'm really curious on what types you guys have? =3