My stupid poser kidnapper wants to show me my missing person's poster but I don't think they do those any more and I kept saying this but they wouldn't listen until they wordlessly handed me a printout of a bbc article talking about it. They want to compose a ransom note with newspaper type but don't know how to buy newspapers as someone under 60 without looking suspicious. The other day I saw in the fridge a carton of oat milk with a home-printed photo of me obviously taken by them awkwardly glued to the side. I don't even get a basement. This is a one-bedroom flat.

i cannot stop making this bitch blush . i cant its too important to me and my agenda

*vigor, warmth, and light returning to my eyes suddenly* That’s right, I’m an irredeemable pervert…!

mutuals have this incredible power to curse you with liking kinks you previously would never engage with even with a gun to your head

T shirt that says “I ❤️ getting laid” & then on the back it says “to REST” with a photo of a coffin + the name & phone number for a local cemetery. Please follow for more advertising ideas