Nine companions. So be it. You shall be the fellowship of the ring. Ā Ā Ā Ā ā Great! Where are we going?

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@valleysurvivor
Nine companions. So be it. You shall be the fellowship of the ring. Ā Ā Ā Ā ā Great! Where are we going?

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The hobbits and the color I associate them with:
Samwise and the color yellow.
My hometown just lost a senior to suicide. I just want to make sure you all know~ it gets better. I remember a time, where I stood in my sisters bathroom with her husbands pistol. My niece, three at the time, was sleeping down the hall. I was ready to end my life. I wanted out. I needed my nightmare to end, I needed the pain to end. I had tons of friends, amazing grades, people who loved me. But my pain was so great, I saw no other way out. But my pain? It was temporary. It was real and yes. It hurt like hell. And sometimes, nearly five years later, I still feel echoes of it. Like a phantom limb with a cramp~itās still there. But Iām healing. Iām happy. My dreams are becoming realities. Iām about to watch my brother graduate college and I get to watch my niece grow up. I get to move in with my best friend and have margaritas with my sister. The sheer terror of the decision I nearly made? It takes my breath away. Reach out. Get help. Tell someone, and if they donāt help, tell someone else. Tell me, Iām always here. Your soul is too beautiful. Donāt choose a permanent fate based on temporary pain. Live this life. Make it your bitch. Conquer this world before you move on to the next š
In one of my classes today, we were discussing the demographics who most frequently use different social media platforms. My prof went through the list and asked who had which~ and when a tumblr came up I was the only one using it. Everyone looked at me a little strangely but JOKES ON YALL this place has given me the best of people, who love me for me and for some reason put up with all my shit. I love you guys š

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Sometimes you just gotta lol and keep it moving
@valleysurvivor
Work-Life Balance
IS A JOKE.
Yesterday: leave at 7:30. Work 9-1. Class 2-3:14 Work 3:45-9. Arrive home at 10. Homework 10-1
Today: leave at 6:30. Work 8-10:30. Class 11-3:15. Work 3:45-9. Home at 10. Homework 10-the limit does not exist
How much coffee is too much coffee??
Adventures in Anxiety
So I had a really stressful/overwhelming day in class yesterday (seriously yāall fuck accounting istg). Then I have to go to work. I went to shred something and my boss asked me to hand it to him so he could use it as scrap paper, but it didnāt register fast enough and I shredded it. Not a big deal right? We have PLENTY of paper in the pharmacy. But it stressed me out. So I started popping the hair tie on my wrist(my boss has picked up on the fact that I do that when anxious). He walks over to me, and really quietly so that nobody else gets all up in my business, tells me to stop. Heās gentle about it? Tells me I donāt need to be mad at myself, itās not a big deal. Then he asks me if itās okay to hug me. I said no, and he just smiled and said ok. But ten minutes later I walked over to him and laid my head on his shoulder. Forehead to shoulder, a minimal touch. He doesnāt say anything. Just lets me rest there for a minute.
Why is this a big deal? Why am I telling you this? Because four months ago, he had no idea what anxiety was like. He made fun of me for flinching, called me a snowflake, was generally awful. Donāt let anybody use age as an excuse to belittle you for your mental issues. My boss is 55. He was not raised with mental health awareness. But he learned. When I came to work for him, he started asking respectful questions. He learned that we canāt have some blanket protocol for how to treat people. He learned because he gives a shit, about me. So if there is somebody in your life who isnāt learning, who isnāt even trying? Someone who repeatedly mocks you, triggers you, or makes you feel unsafe? Drop them. There is no excuse for that behavior.
Finding your Soulmate
I hate this idea that soulmates have to be romantic partners cuz BUTCH NO. I found mine, and she is my world. She is sunshine on cloudy days, rain after a desert. She is the sun to my moon, and the night to my day. She is my bravery, and I, her anchor. She is my peace, and I, her laughter. She knows the depths of my sorrows and the heights of my joys because she lives them with me. She is also annoying. We do NOT have a perfect relationship. I am too clingy. It took us years to learn how to fight, while still respecting each other. We once went six months without speaking to each other, and we both recall it as one of the worst times in our lives. But I find new reasons to be grateful for her every day. Currently, itās super late and Iām watching this slideshow picture frame my brother made at Christmas. Itās filled with all of these great memories of our family~ and my girl is a major actor. She is not like my sister, she is my other half. I canāt wait to see our dreams become realities as we take this world by storm and rise above the trials of our lives to become more than anyone ever dreamt that we could be. I love you Goose. @worldslover
Also, please come home. I miss you

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also
Men are so āprivileged,ā that they have less of a chance to win custody of children after a divorce, along with having higher suicide rates, homeless rates, and die at work rates. Yeahā¦. soooo āprivilegedāĀ
goody, now letās do sexual assault, sex trafficking, spousal abuse, and some other handy pink and blue circles
you fucking moron
1- combat deaths exclude women because women in most countries are not allowed to be in combat. therefore most women who die during war are counted as civilian deaths. Women are also more likely to die after a conflict is officially over than during the conflict itself. Please also note that combat deaths comprise 2-29% of total deaths related to wartime (see table 2). Therefore, 71-98% of all wartime deaths happen after the conflict is officially over, typically caused by things like infectious diseases and traffic accidents due to the damage to infrastructure that inevitably follows a war. These deaths are primarily seen in women and children. From the same reference as above:Ā
Effect of Armed Conflict on Life Expectancy - Plümper and Neumayer 2006 In this study, armed conflict was demonstrated to have a statistically significant and adverse effect on women as measured by the decline in the ratio of female to male life expectancy (Plümper and Neumayer 2006). Normally women live longer than men in almost all societies, so a decrease in the gender gap is interpreted as suggesting that the direct and indirect consequences of conflict combined either kill more women or that the killed women are younger on average than the men killed. The authors therefore concluded that wars negatively affected women more than men when taking into account the entire conflict cycle.
So the takeaway is that yes, more men than women die in combat, but this is because in the vast majority of combat zones, even in recent history, women were specifically barred from being considered active combat, making them more likely to be counted among civilian casualties than military casualties. (Civilian casualties comprise approximately 90% of all war time deaths.)
Therefore the graph should look more like this (assuming the highest ratio of military:civilian ratio and extrapolating it onto every single conflict ever AND accepting the numbers given above as accurate):
(please note that the gray above would be mostly female in most conflicts)
2- custody is not contested in a majority of all cases (link to another tumblr post enumerating the stats)Ā Men who seek custody are more likely to receive itĀ and abusive fathers are the most likely to seek custody. From source #2 in this bullet point:
Fathers who actively seek custody obtain either primary or joint physical custody over 70% of the time.
Therefore the graph would look more like this:
3- Child abusers are numerically more likely to be female, but when you consider that 90% of the time, child caregivers are female and only 10% of the time child caregivers are male, the likelihood of an individual female or male to abuse children is tipped in the favor of men: see here for a breakdown of the probabilities. It is p=0.77 for men and p=0.23 for women, making men nearly four times as likely to abuse children they have access to than women. Here is the graph:
4- Homicide: Homicides are also most likely to be perpetrated by men. Men commit approximately 88.7% of US homicides. So letās make it fair:
5- Homelessness: single men are more likely than single women to become homeless. Thatās where that statistic comes from. However, the stat ignores that 34% of the homeless are families, and that 84% of those families are female-headed. Homeless women are far more likely to be responsible for the care of a child under the age of 18 than homeless men (US stats only)
Women and families are also the fastest growing segment of the homeless population.Ā
6- Suicides. Women attempt suicide more often than men and have higher rates of mental illness. Suicide by definition is self-inflicted harm. To blame women for the actions of men (as many of these graphs actually do) is dishonest.Ā
7- College graduates: Until the mid-20th century most higher education was barred to women. The fact that men earned more college degrees was framed as a justification for how much more intelligent men were than women. Now, of course, that women have more of a chance to earn the same degrees, it is being painted as female privilege. Interesting how it wasnāt male privilege that keeps faculty overwhelmingly white and male. In fact letās take a look at that:Ā
Bonus: breakdown of faculty by race from the same source
The Alaskan Native and Native American representation in higher learning is so low that it rounds to zero percent. In all my years of lab work, research, symposia, and interviews, I have only met one phd holder in my life who was a Native American.Ā
To get back to the matter at hand, however, itās interesting how those privileged women are still primarily learning from male faculty. Also interesting is to see how many professors have successfully climbed the tenure track to reach full professor (It is in the link above; I am simply showing the breakdown of all collegiate instructors.)
8- Work place deaths. The professions with the highest workplace death incidence are also the professions where women are either officially or unofficially barred from entry. Logging, working on the oil fields, even being a female truck driver can leave women vulnerable to attack at truck stops from other truck drivers or stopping motorists.Ā However, I will concede that more men die in the workplace than women, so long as those workplaces are legal and aboveboard.Ā
Women still make up the vast majority of trafficking victims, sweatshop workers, and prostitutes in the world. All of those professions, were they cataloged, would certainly rival some of the deadliest US professions.Ā
Bonus, for TS: Forcible rape is perpetrated by men 99.1% of the time and by women 0.9% of the time.
hello police Iād like to report a murder
men: the wage gap is a myth because women choose lower paying positions
also men: more men dying in workplace accidents than women is female privilege
I donāt really have time to text back and Iām sorry, but Hugo and I are moving to Spain tomorrow and I wonāt be able to text you guys, again. Iāve been feeling better, so has Hugo. Weāre doing okay! Please take care and I love you! @dajosaf @worldslover @valleysurvivorĀ
Hope you three are okay. Hugo says he loves you!
Babes!! Hey I love you both! Travel safe and take care of yourselves pretty please! Miss you both so fucking much šš
A Letter from the Dark Place
If life was like a walk in the woods, depression is a trap, a hole in the ground. It isnāt however, well-hidden. I see it coming. I know the exact moment when my body will make the familiar fall. I know every snake, spider and sharp rock inside. And the craziest thing? I know the way out. I know the way around it. But itās like coming home from a long day of work and knowing that you hate sleeping with socks on, but lacking the energy to remove them from your feet. When the terrain gets rough, the conditions insufferable, and the storms of life rage all around me, I lack the energy to maneuver around the trap. So instead, I fall. And once Iāve fallen, I am already handicapped. The dangers of the hole: the self-hatred, the anger, the sleeplessness, the self-harm and eating disorders; I am susceptible to their bite and sting. And all of these factors wear me down, so even though I can see the path out, I will not take it. So please, know that I am sorry. I too, wish I had not taken this plunge again. I too, wish that we had more time together before my relapse. Have patience, when I cannot force myself to eat or sleep. When my mouth spews hateful comments like a volcano spitting fiery ash. When I do not want to watch a movie with you. When it takes me hours, days, or weeks to respond to the simplest text. My struggles are real. I am in the dark place, and I am terrified. I am exgausted. I have been hurt by my own brain more than you could know. The one thing that gets me through, that keeps me standing and that will eventually be the push, the burst of adrenaline so desperately needed to force my way out of the hole and back into your world, our world, itās you. Knowing that you wait for me, with a smile and a laugh and love. Knowing that there is sunlight and warmth and fresh air, waiting on me to welcome it. So please my friend, do not give up on me. I hope to see you soon.
Itās a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you donāt keep your feet, thereās no knowing where you might be swept off to. The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001) dir. Peter Jackson

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Equal rights is a spook. Its neither desirable or practical. Different people should have different responsibilities. Do you think elites let women vote because it wasĀ āfairā? Or because they saw a way to increment their power? It turned women into more reliable units of production and tanked the average salary. Womanās suffrage destroyed the west. A slow death that will last centuries.
Conservatives in 2019 literally still mad that women can vote.
You could say that anything caused āa slow death that will last centuriesā. For example āthe invention of pizza rolls is destroying the west. A slow death that will last centuries.ā See? Itās obviously untrue because pizza rolls are inherently good.
@khanofthemardu correlation does not equal causation. Also. Love that you squeezed pizza rolls in there
Try your hardest not to love a drug addict. Youāll never be enough for them. Their love for you gets buried beneath that addiction until youāre just an obstacle to overcome, a bank to manipulate, and a person they can hurt.