|| vala ||

I now identify as quantumgender (qgender for short)

basically my gender exists as a superposition of possibilities as it exists within my consciousness in a state before it is formulated into language, however upon observation this state collapses into a discrete set of possibilities, for me this set is {girl, boy, agender)

but only when it's loud

does it open wide revealing

my very own shroud

i sink as a lie

sink into the siren's cry

into the sawtooth rain

can it free me of pain 

it calls for a trade

to take all this anguish 

for the price of a blade

and the longer i sit with this deal

the more that i languish

the lesser i feel

---------------------------

a flame without match, stifled be

an eternal hatches nightly free

follicles mar within unbounded lazarus

the paradoxical char upon untoasted amethyst

founded i, my ghost it shrieks

sound the eye, its hearing peaks

beyond a figment, reality churns

because All that is all that burns

there is no reclaim

there is no solace

there is only

the deep

deep

------------------------

at the cavernous depths

of the hippo's trench

divers plunge

in search of evil

in search of hope

in search of closure

they find only what they take with them

every thought

every rationale

contorts the blackening walls around them

entrapping

suffocating

puncturing

why do they still dive

what lies beneath

--------

abrogate the air that stifles incursion

the frictional shivs of my spilt afterimage

harvests the essences welled in this visage

and burrows his stingers in nests of recursion

i will bleed in shimmering silver

as the magpies nurse my trembling wound

their stomachs rupture and birth new rivers

that feed their young; their cries obtund

his beaks shall crease and warp my armour

their tendrils threading through her hide

cursed to bear; forever to harbour