Livin’ Lá Vida Loca

I’ve been gone for awhile. I’m trying to be better about my health. Thanks to everyone who sent kind messages in the inbox, it meant a lot that people care. <3

I like to think Spam was lowkey offended until he found a way to insult Ramb from it.

He cares so deeply about the world but lacks the empathy to connect with people the way he does with animals,,, he feels both alienated from the masses and also like he is the only one who has woken up to the jaded reality of the world

he is just a kid he doesn’t have the ability to make any substantial change and that bothers him. The world is shit and he can’t do anything but watch it burn

He wants to do the right thing but he rarely does. Stan is selfish. He doesn’t like to think about it, but he is. He is so easily influenced by praise and fame and money and power and a sense of belonging that he gets blindsided and forgets his core values in search of approval and adoration.

He wants so badly to fit in— he pretends to fit in— he even fools his friends into thinking he fits in. Terribly enough, Stan is so confused about his identity and has such a fragile perception of self, he will convince himself that this new clique or niche that he’s involved with is were he belongs.

But he can never fool himself into believing, he knows that there’s part of him that won’t fit in no matter how hard he tries to squash that thought.

A weird, sensitive, cynical, kid who craves normalcy but will never truly get it….

And I’m not even getting into the gender identity issues and obvious AuDD that is another can of worms entirely