who killed you?

          “  nope!  but that sounds way cooler than me bleaching my hair,  so i think i’m gonna stick with that story.   but,  uh—-   senpai,  maybe don’t try and get struck by lightning.  “

          “  doesn’t the sky look great from here?  “    there’s bubbling excitement in his voice and while the garden might be the setting,  for once,  the flowers aren’t his focus,  an array of stars laid out before him stealing his gaze.   stargazing had been more of a whim of an idea than anything—-  surena still barely knows a thing about the night sky.    /  @unregal

this kills me bc , I Love Them, but also because it’s like, one of the most obvious scenes in which you can see leo’s mental state rapidly and dangerously deteriorating...

he used to think everyone in chess were his friends, and he fought so hard to keep them all together even though izumi and eichi and madara and everyone else who even so much glanced at them for a second knew he was being used, but like izumi said, leo didn’t immediately think the worst of people. he constantly says he loves them, even if it’s someone he just met, because it’s true! he found so much beauty in life and people, and he was so full of love to give them, and so he did without even questioning it... and then he found out all that love was unrequited, that people were cruel and were only close to him since his songs benefitted them. save for a few people, the whole world turned against him, his fans became scared at him changing from the sweet boy he used to be into a ruthless king, and he only had izumi in the core of it all.

so he just... latches on to izumi emotionally (which is always a Bad Idea, but it’s Extra Bad bc izumi wasn’t exactly in his best state here either), because izumi was the first person he became friends with, because izumi was so kind and caring and hardworking it made leo think everyone else must be like him too. 

and he’s terrified of losing izumi too, to the point that he devoted himself to him so thoroughly he didn’t care how many bodies he left behind as long as they made izumi happy. the leo who used to be so genuinely childlike with wonder and joy, the leo who hated conflict and fights and just wanted everyone to get along, the leo who would bear beatings if it meant peace, becoming someone who would “destroy” anyone who looked at izumi wrong if he just said so...

why do you hurt me so

he wonders so too for himself, hanging by a thread between restless ghost and lost boy, of chivalrous knight and cruel king. he can’t see his face from beneath his crown, can’t feel his body from under the red velvet robe, wandering the hallways like he’s returning from his funeral everyone attended but won’t speak of, reeking of old blood not his own they pretend not to see.

he doesn’t really know who he is, these days.

but surena...