I am grade 12 student. You might call me accomplished, and in a way, I am, but not in the way you’d think. 12 years of pouring over text books and being lined up to be judged in front of my peers has not made me any more intelligent, but I’m lucky to also have my friends who encouraged me no matter what. I can tell you the first digits of Pi and I can explain to you the difference between an acid and a base, I can recite the Pythagorean Theorem in my sleep, and sometimes I will also memories my text books. But I cannot express or tell you the value of security, or of kindness. The distinct contrast between personal health and personal gain. I can tell you in grade 10 four of my classmates attempted to take their own lives before finals. I can tell you that our office is always booked. I can tell you how when I didn’t understand something in Chemistry my teacher asked me to leave if I could not participate in his class. I merely asked her to explain a question. Instead of doing his job and teaching, he told me to leave. Told me I was not good enough to be there. Mistakes are viewed as failure in almost every time. There is no “average” here, but I can tell you that I am an average girl, maybe that explains the hard times. We are expected to exceed expectations. Do your parents know that a grade that is considered average is a “C”? Once I got C, and all I heard is that I am not good enough, so had to prove myself and yes, I did push myself too hard. They said I was lazy. I never fool around. I worked and worked and worked, with a deep hollow of anxiety in my chest. I have never been good at History, never was, but I worked and worked and I attained at best B. It was not good enough. It is not said but we are expected to put our education before our personal health. It is not asked of us, but it is what we must do to achieve what we are asked to achieve. Our teachers will tell you, “Oh, I only give them one hour of homework each night.” Which is essentially true. But we never had one subjects. Overdue classwork, and projects. Say goodbye to sleep, say goodbye to feeling calm. Even when you get 100 percent on an assignment they still criticize you, it is never good enough. One slip, and you are in deep deep trouble. I can tell you that 90 percent of us try our hardest, and our teachers and parents stand in the sidelines, screaming, “You can do better than that’’
stormborns
germansingergirl
