f e m m e

INTRODUCTION

Greet warmly and compliment how he looks. “You’re looking good today.”

Ask him how his week has been.

Tell him my week has been good. I’ve been hitting the gym, took a driver’s class, met with a friend for dinner, and planning to get some flowers after the call.

Thanks for getting on this call with me! I appreciate you being here with me.  I just wanted to share some things that have been coming to mind since the last time we hung out together.

POINT ONE: COMMUNICATION AND DAILY EXPECTATIONS

Something that’s coming to mind that I’m realizing that I haven’t had the chance to ask you is: What does a healthy connection look like to you? This could be like day-to-day communication. I just wanted to hear your thoughts on what that looks like so we both have an idea of each other’s viewpoint on this.

For me — I have a bit of a confession -LOL - but I really prefer not to rely on texting every day to keep in contact with each other. For me, I’m someone who generally is not a texter — even with my closest of friends. I’m an introvert, and I’m someone who often needs some time to recharge and come back to myself. Even when I have an amazing time with someone. My idea of a healthy amount of communication look like every other day.  Or a single phone call once in a while is good too.

Don’t get me wrong, I really love when you send me songs and messages that recall something we’ve talked about in person. It makes me feel good to know that you’re present with me when we spend time together.

The best way I feel reassured is having a date scheduled in advance so that we both have that day to look forward to without getting caught up in the texting back and forth.

I think that early on in dating, it’s good to have healthy space to not only build excitement and tension, but for us to balance our own lives. There’ something about texting every day in early dating that actually takes away from the experience of building intimacy in person because it’s so easy to feign emotional connection through texting constantly. I would hate for us to have a break down in communication because we are both feeling overwhelmed by the pressure to text every day.

What do you think about that?

I would love to figure out a way we can communicate that is comfortable for the both of us. Where we can both recharge and come back to ourselves, and then show up presently for each other.

POINT TWO: HESITATION FOR FLIRTATION AND AFFECTION

Another thing that’s coming to mind since the last time we spent time together is that I’ve noticed that there seems to be a hesitancy surrounding flirtation and affection. I feel like our second date really felt right and good. It felt safe to experience that kind of touch and closeness with you. It really broke down some walls for me personally. But I think I noticed in our last date, there seemed to be some hesistancy.

I just wanted to check in with you and ask how you’re feeling about that and what’s coming up for you?

FREE BALL IT.