Critter Chronicles 🐾

Ever have a dream where you develop a multi-million-dollar idea and you can’t wake up because you need to make it a success? It started in Joann. I was at the cutting counter, and someone set their kid down to run the store. It was modeled like one of those old fabric shops — aisles of fabric, enormous cutting table in the middle, none of that grasshopper, paper, or sticker nonsense wasting…

“I wish I could’ve done that! That guy’s a menace!” the bartender said. He set a fresh bottle of ice-cold Coors Light in front of me, adding, “This one’s on me!” I said “thanks” and smiled awkwardly, sitting alone in the corner next to the popcorn machine, whose level never noticeably changed but always seemed to be popping. I wasn’t ashamed. I wasn’t embarrassed. I just don’t like attention…