𝒜𝓁𝓁, 𝕠𝕣 𝔑𝔬𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔫𝔤

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Blog is semi-hiatus.

[05/10/2025]:

Here's the book I was working on by the way :3c

玫:

It's a wonder why she's not been physical with him yet, and she wonders that when his words cradle her ear in a warm manner that's far too close. He's in her space. Had he been anyone on the sidewalk — anyone normal, boring, and typical — he'd be warned, and if persistent, would likely not have a good time physically. He's interesting, and she's interested, and that is a rarity from an individual.

She does not know him. He betrays nothing, and that's what makes her paranoia worsen under that stoic surface. Even though he is taller, bulkier... She's conjured several hypothetical scenarios in her head on how to go about it if she has to. Basic taught her technique, survival taught her resourcefulness. Will she use his bulk and weight against him? The furniture? Go for vulnerable anatomy? Use the folded knife in her jacket?

Far too many options.

Her side-eye is sharp when she watches him, an inkling of warning closing in at his words, but the sigh that leaves her sounds like it would best coincide with an eye roll. She hates explaining herself. It's also destressing to a degree, unaware she'd been holding her breath.

"I have a tendency to be vague" she explains, "What I meant by that is — no, I don't have a boyfriend. I never have. No friends, nor family. Social connections aren't important to me. My work; however, is... And I don't understand why my nonexistent social network is relevant to this painting." Her words cross as matter-of-fact, like she's reading a textbook. She doesn't sound like she cares at all. Just business. A candid indifference. It's typically rude to display, but she isn't the respecting type toward formality. Honest by default.

She would appear delicate if she wasn't using her eyes and blunt words as a contrast. Sophisticated, distant, and cold. Confident, intense, and a bit arrogant. It's imperative she maintains this despite the screaming and thrashing anxiety in her psyche, that something about him is off. This house is too strange beyond the peculiar. It's there, but can't place why.

玫:

The sound that leaves her is hushed, a quiet hum. Hard to say if this was thought, curiosity, or interest being triggered. It's coupled with that slight turn of the head, an animal questioning a sensation or behavior.

He's not stupid, she can assess as much. To ask questions like these means he thinks far too much, has many questions, wants answers... That's how she at least perceives these inquisitive people. She is one herself.

"It would be the case, yes" she confirms, "My knowing too much, giving someone information that can be abused and exploit others... It would be my responsibility to keep it lock and key, yet in order for a people to advance, they have the right to know and understand. It's how we have civilization, societies, order — trial and error..."

Her arm raises then, with a dainty hand unveiling from one of the long sleeves to give a fluttering butterfly a perch on her index knuckle. It's observed plainly, with mild interest, yet respect. It's hard not to miss this slight soft gaze she gives this creature, a very selective courtesy and kindness to things not human is obvious.

玫:

He has her attention — which can be a good or bad thing, depending on who you ask and what her mood is. She's given the impression that he thinks she's a deity, and some have called her this over the course of her long life. Predominantly for how she looks and speaks, she's too outlandish, but also in part that she is someone who stays around far longer than one should. Human beings don't live forever, and she certainly gives this impression.

He is by far the most interesting of his entire group. Not everyone has such an extensive and expanded mindset.

"You seem to think me godlike, or of such status" she utters with some mild amusement, but it's far more flat and veiled than as animated as one may be. "I am not so, nor do I believe in such things. I merely respect nature as she has cultivated it." The clarification is necessary. She's not a god. She is human, started out as such... Her circumstances were merely different, and set for her. An ironic thing, given his question about fate and roles.

"Information is power, as I've stated. Such a thing is a key to many doors, and I have been alive for far too long to have seen majority of what lies beyond them: Greed, power, and domination. A hand could count the instances which it is used for their communities, families — the betterment of those around them than ill-intention... In some way, I myself am responsible for such an outcome. I swayed a moment in life, an experience, or aided destruction of another." She explains this somewhat vaguely. Like she doesn't want to say too much, give any ideas. A testament to what she just said. She's responsible for giving someone a proverbial key to a door yet opened. She's not a god for doing so. It's just moral obligation — ethical, in some cases.

"Because of this — depending on the magnitude of information given — if it should be something so altering that it defies nature or disrupts balance in this world, I am responsible to correct such actions... The only exemptions would be the ignorant and oblivious, as they do not know what was said and given. The individual who asked for knowledge and misused it will simply be added to my garden, nothing more."

Her violet eyes settle on him again, with a dark existential dullness. Maybe it's her exhaustion with life, this same song and dance she's experienced and endured for centuries. Perhaps it's arrogance that she looks an Uchiha in the eye, especially with such eyes active that would typically warrant a person to be wary. It's another note to perhaps her strength, her disregard for herself and this uncaring demeanor for the typical. She is not to be trifled with. It's a quiet reminder.

玫:

"If you're going to assume so casually of me, I'm going to give you issues..."

@chidoricry

玫:

"Telling yourself that by using my life as an example will only be more fruitful by your actions, Sasuke. Letting your emotions take reign of your body and mind will bring you down with me, understand?"

Apathetic:

A lot of art drawn does not often depict Sakuyoru emoting, and it's not because of a skill barrier, it's just because she is always emotionless in the face and in her body language. Nothing about her makes much sense, and she tends to defy the norm. It's how she prefers it — to be left unread.

It was a conditioned behavior from her father: To not ever show emotions. It was such a learned behavior that it never did go away as she aged.

Despite what she is taught, she feels very deeply. Whatever is felt, it's always seen in her eyes, but never her face. All of it internalized, all the time. Particularly anger and sadness, which impact her more profoundly than any other feeling. Great sensations of despair trigger an all-body tenseness, shaking, and tearful eyes — but she will never actively shed them. It's no longer forced, just habitual. You cannot tell her to not bottle something in, it's just her default. It's enough she will let you see her feel so greatly in an instance of vulnerability.

The concept of being indominable and unyielding is what defines her from an outward perspective, and it's what she wants to convey at all times. This uncanny immovability is what also crosses as a warning, like how animals will show bright colors to detail toxicity and a deterrent, and for her — it is so outwardly presented it tends to make people feel uncomfortable, judged, or inferior if she is watching them.

Her apathy is also a form of numbness and detachment, and is often seen in those who experienced great trauma. In a way, it is a defense mechanism, but is intensely debilitating at the same time. Loneliness is something she feels greatly as well, but perceives it as a necessary cost for her own emotional and mental safety when it comes to connections with others.

Tagged By: @s-talking Tagging: Anyone who wishes to do so

@chidoricry

玫:

"The dawn waits for no one, young raven" the woman muses, her hand teasing the dark and disheveled spikes, correcting it only after a moment of meddling.

"You must learn that in this world you must be ready for everything and anything. Death will not wait for you to sober, nor give you a second try." she reminds, the slight tenderness in her tone being the only softness to cushion the intense monotone she brings. Never was it a brevity with her. No leisure, at least not as often as he might prefer. With no doubt, he is more than protected in her presence from all the things she claims, but she will not always be around him at every instance. He must learn and retain the teachings, as cruel as they may seem in this era of 'peace'.

玫:

The silence she puts this room in is uncomfortable at best, only likely due to the fact she is simply staring and watching. Ever so still like the cold of winter. It's hard to pinpoint what she's thinking, if she's planning, scheming... This mask of hers puts even a porcelain doll to shame. Right until she finally sighs to herself through her nose. Not really defeated, but it's there. Like she's come to terms with herself.

"I am guarded for the information I harbor for good reason" she starts, the monotone she's carried so far has a tired lilt to it, but it's not to betray that she is very capable and ready at all times. Life is not kind, and thus you must be cruel when necessary.

"I care not what moral and/or ethical conscience you maintain — should you agree or no — knowing things is not for the faint of heart, and is a greater asset than an army of many men." Her bare soles finally move. There was not such a single sound from her as she moved, a testament to her ability to be unseen effortlessly. This inaudible approach is toward the window where he is closest, but only to stand by its wooden frame looking out. It's not hard to tell she is taller than him at 6 feet, which is a rare feat even for a woman.

"The tailed beasts have a history older than all of us. The power they encompass in themselves is but a fraction to a greater entity, split in 9 parts to keep order... To so much as attempt to control one is suicide, and to keep its energy stowed away is a fool's demise on this world."

Not a chance in Hell this woman is that old. She looks like she just turned 20, but talks like an elder. Maybe she's being vague for a reason. Trust issues and all that...

"Being that I know more than one should, for such an overstayed extent of time, means I carry pertinent information that could easily sway this world. Be it a mundane task, a village, or in such a case as tailed beasts — the world. I have responsibility to assess where that information falls to, and whom knows it. If by any means what I relay is used for ill-purpose that is beyond mere wars and human nonsense, I will have no choice but to step in and make... corrective measures" It's not said lightly. If anything, stating so much as corrective measures didn't sound like a mere assassination mission, no collection operation. It seems she understands her vagueness was not helpful, so when she looks at him — it's like Death was standing there instead, warning.

Death did ride a pale horse...

"Whomever is informed that undermines the balance of nature: They will be sought. Those they informed so much as a vague single word, is sought. If their families and neighbors informed, they are sought... There will be no trace of what was said, written, nor recorded. If I must, should this information be housed in a town, village, or any civilization that it has been mass-spread — it will be cleaned out and its foundations torn asunder like a clean slate."

玫:

The sound of a single-horse carriage is what gave away its nearing approach. A rough rolling against old overgrown cobblestone in tandem with light trotting of a black horse, whom was being guided by a servant on its back donning grey samue. Not too opulent was the courtier carriage, but obviously noble in material: The wooden boards painted a deep red, a black ornate top, and golden accents. There was a neat golden rope above the entrance of this carriage specifically, adorned with shide as if it was a holy space.

Once the horse halted, the door was opened almost readily so. Not by the servant, but a beauteous woman donning a red-violet hanfu with various floral patterns. Her skin so very porcelain in its pallor, and long styled hair as white as snow. It made her stand out all the more with this lovely tinge of color at her eyes and lips as she smiled their way. Carefully stepping out to give a respectful and curt bow.

When she stood again, her eyes looked so joyous. Like she was seeing distant family members again after a long time away. These people were strangers to her in reality, but something about her was so welcoming. A far cry from the very formal and almost stern wording in the scroll sent by her husband a month ago.

"I understand the formality is out of place. Do forgive me." she says sweetly, her words soft and pleasant to the ears. Her Korean was somewhat fluent, but it’s distinct that she was taught and not grown with the language. “I couldn't help myself to see my son and mother in law in person so soon... I felt you deserved to be seen by one of us directly than being sent a servant. Please do step inside. I'll explain along the way to our estate" she ushers, her gentle hand hovering but not touching as she directly assists them into the carriage. Her scent is a lovely and quiet lavender undertone as she sits among them.

"I am Xiù Fāng, lady of the Fāng estate~" she begins warmly, dainty hands folded upon her lap in a very formal and calm fashion, despite the happiness akin to an excited child dancing behind her bright lavender eyes.

Towering trees untouched for hundreds if not thousands of years pass by them on the ride back. The moment the cobblestone became more even and cleaned up is when the cherry blossoms started to show, overhanging in places until they ended at a tori gate. It was walled off, on each side and around the entirety. The stone path turned into wood as they walked across the bridge and up to the combination of an estate and a castle. It was surrounded by water in places, and seemed to be modelled around it to preserve the land. Many more servants donning brown samue were waiting by the entrance up a little bit of stairs, but no one else was present. It was like nature had a heavy hand in this, it felt like they were still outside than on noble grounds. More like a sacred shrine of sorts, or maybe that was also part of the estate.

“My husband is out at the moment, but aware of your arrival and will be back in time for the wedding. Please do make yourselves at home” the lady assures, walking ahead to guide them to the tearoom. Her sandals left by the doorway in favor of softer shoes to meander. It seems this arrival was well accounted for, as perfect shoe sizes for the young man and his mother were there in order as well.

“Please feel free to get accustomed to our estate at your pace, I know it's a bit spacious... It belonged to my ancestors for generations — typically upheld by a matriarchal shrine maiden — so you may see much older architecture about. We keep it organized by sections: We arrived on the southern side, and now in the center where the tearoom and meeting space reside. The upper portion is where myself and my husband stay, east is the prince's wing, and the west is where things like the library are located. The gardens are north of us, where the ceremony will be held. There are always servants nearby if you need assistance.” she informs extensively, her words ever gentle, as if she was a doting matriarch. It seemed to be a habitual and generational mindset with her ancestors to be so.

The young man’s mother is approached a bit giddily, fawning over her garments quietly at its make and color. “I’m sure your son won’t mind I steal you for a while to talk of arrangements?” she utters, a twinkle in her eyes, but it wasn’t menacing or conniving. Clearly she just wants to surprise their sons to be wed later in the day, and consult his mother for any equal considerations.

“Oh… Should it be okay he meet my dear rose now? Or should we surprise them both at the ceremony?” she asks, her giggling light and infectious as her gaze rests on the woman's son. Her 'scheming' was playful in nature.

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