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@uhhhhjhfrogs

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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thinking fondly of this meme I made for a coworker years and years ago
i know in my heart that shane is the most obnoxious sick person of all time
not because he's a baby a la classic man cold
but because he will AGGRESSIVELY try to pretend he is not sick
he is trying to gaslight others but ALSO himself
he has a gold medal immune system thank you he did NOT get taken down by ill pikeling spreading Elementary School Plague to him
not happening
as an itty bitty he lied so he wouldn't have to skip hockey, and that has NOT changed as an adult
his true toxic trait is that he WILL be typhoid mary in that locker room if it means he doesn't have to stay home and miss playing
the majority of the struggle when shane is sick is just making him ADMIT he is sick
Tags via @penandinkprincess
also CACKLING about the way this looks on the outside.
like. no one else on the team understands Hollander Illness Behavior yet, so they're teasing ilya about being overprotective because shane is SO underplaying it and meanwhile ilya is just, "no, i am so fucking serious. get a medic and then call an ambulance."
and shane who is barely on this realm of existence and about 0.2 seconds from having Involuntary Floor Time is just, "don't worry :) i'll just take an advil or something :)"
WHICH IS NOT HELPING EVERYONE ELSE UNDERSTAND THE MOTHERFUCKING GRAVITY OF THE SITUATION, SHANE, NO MORE CONTRIBUTIONS AT THIS TIME FROM YOU, THANK YOU
i can't explain what seeing him in a cap does to me
Movie about a depressed and rather morbid autistic man planning to commit suicide and picking up a number of odd jobs in an effort to raise enough money to meticulously plan and prepay for his funeral so his mother doesn’t have to worry about it after he is gone. He begins to connect with people and enjoy life for the first time while working part time as a greeter in the funeral home, helping an eccentric old lady organize her basement, walking 7 dogs and maintaining a feral cat colony for a guy with a broken foot, playing a number of bit parts in local ads and stocking the shelves at the convenience store at night. In the end, he has befriended many of his neighbors and he decides he does not want to die and goes back to school to become a funeral director instead.
He is popular at his funeral home gig because he keeps accidentally saying things that are very reassuring and death positive. Because he wants to die. He eventually donates his funeral fund to the old lady’s granddaughter after her sudden death so she does not have to sell her grandmother’s prized possessions to pay for her funeral.
The old lady gifts him one of her ceramic cats at the beginning of the film which he reluctantly accepts out of politeness. Near the end of the film, he adopts a friendly cat from the cat colony that looks remarkably like the ceramic cat and names it after her, signaling his commitment to surviving and caring for his cat the way the old woman lived for her ceramic collection.

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Lots of drama in our household
my favorite thing about the "guy fieari doesn't swallow" controversy is that in every video i've seen on it there's someone in the comments going "actualy we were featured in diners drive in and dive episode 342 and he came to our restaurant and he definitely ate our food on and off camera like he cleared the plate and he's a really chill dude actualy" and it's like. does guy fieari know that he has a loyal army across America defending him AS WE SPEAK against the stupidest conspiracy theory i've ever heard of
guy fieri doesn’t what now?

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is it possible to fix my life but still be weird abt books tv film & music forever? i will attempt it
College AU Russian studies major Shane Hollander forgets to tell the fuckbuddy he met through his speaking tutor Svetlana Vetrova that he is fluent in Russian and that he understands phrases like "you're so fucking perfect" and "you have ruined me" and "you look like a sexy librarian you perfect slut"
among the reasons i love shane goes to boston as an idea is that cliff marlowe is a fucking GIANT of a man, and i have the very funny idea in my head that being ilya's boyfriend means shane gets auto-included into the Bro Manhandling that i KNOW that man gives out to his friends.
and like. LISTEN. shane is a tough, strong dude, okay? he has played a heavy contact sport since he was an itty bitty. he is no shrinking violet. he can take a hit and get back up and keep going. he's no stranger to like. grabbing shoulders and a little playful jostling. but i also feel like his vibe on the team with the metros made him a little untouchable (first with respect that still made him "other" and then with. well.) beyond things like shoulder punches from jj and helmet taps with hayden.
and now he's gotten tossed into this locker room where he is accepted and welcomed but ALSO maybe getting fucking whiplash on the reg from cliff's affection. like hey! thank you for including me! but also you just fucking RAGDOLLED me the SECOND i walked in here today and i am a little turned on and ALARMED about it. just a little.
like hits on the ice? yeah. shane understands those. gets 'em and deals 'em all the time. no big. a little bro shoulder tapping/shaking? yeah sure.
but cliff just fucking. 🗣️HOLL-ZY! MY GUUUY! 🗣️ and that is shane's ONLY warning that he's about to get borderline shaken adult syndrome. everyone else in the locker room including ilya knows to brace or dodge by this point, but shane is still adjusting.
and like!! it's nice!! thank you for including me!! but also jesus fuck!!! i have a new empathy for anya's favorite toy when she death shakes it!! oh my god!!!
Post-outing and post- honeymoon pre-season Hollanov step out and are photographed for the first time in Ottawa featuring Shane— white t-shirt pre-season muscles bulging gray sweatpants dick outline healthy yes he's wearing his reeboks Mom and Ilya— decked out in TIGht Adidas track pants with the snaps black tank top clinging to that waist with Anya on a bedazzled leash— YES they're holding hands rings glinting in the golden hour YES they have their dog at this outside restaurant seating YES they're going to win this season YES Shane will have dessert and will give the first bite to his husband YES they're dropping a black card in the bill YES they're kissing each other's hands at the table and in a way it's kind of like Diana in her revenge dress except their best revenge is just living their best fucking life TOGETHER
My Shane is an enabler. He’s gonna roll his eyes and tell ilya to fuck himself, but he loves that shit. He’s icing Ilya injuries after a fight barely hiding the fact that he found it funny. He’s providing information for chirps. He’s joining in on the fun cause he loves his husband. Idk man I just don’t think Shane, who fell in love with the NHLs biggest asshole is gonna be annoyed when he’s being an asshole.

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FIHMF!!!!!!!!
FRANÇOIS ARNAUD François Arnaud x Under Armour Teaser